Let's be honest - It's money time...

flanna01

Greetings my little Fur Ball's... It's been a while.

Yes my little cherubs, It's time for the boxing Guru to post the annual Christmas Cracker, the very one that rolled home at 15/1 not too many moons ago....

I have sat back and viewed this forum from the 'outside'... I very rarely intruded on the many squabbles I seen breaking out, indeed some of them quite amused me...

However, one thing is for certain... You need a Father figure to keep ye all in line, there's no discipline anymore?? Some of the new punters are either sucking on a bong pipe 24/7, or are indeed just a plain embarrassment to themselves, their parents, and basically society in general..... I would prefer to assume they are under the influence of something.... Pleease don't tell me they are the future of boxing debate and opinion..??

So then, without further ado, allow me to present the cast iron, rock solid, guaranteed ** 15/1 ** 2015 Flanna Christmas Cracker....

Yes my little ass wipes I said 15/1 !!!

There is practically no risk whatsoever attached to this wager, it is legally holding up your local investment agency, and clearing out their tills (bookies to the bong pipe suckers).

The 15/1 Christmas Cracker will be bear fruit at the beginning of December, so all your festive needs will be catered for in good time...

All aboard Pilgrims.. The Flanna Express is leaving once again!

1) Fedor Chudinov
2) Lucas Mattysse
3) Liam Smith
4) Kell Brook
5) Wlad Klitshko (KO)
6) Anthony Crolla
7) Canelo Alvarez
8) Anthony Joshua (KO)

All the above to win (Except Wlad Klit & Joshua - They win by KO) 15/1 !!

Now my little hens... Go forth and proper... Their is drink to be supped!!

flanna01

So my little poodle droppings....

That's the first of the Christmas cracker picks home and dry.... So much for the popular opinion that the Bugman would be knocked out by the machine....

There was more chance of the Mrs uttering some kind words over the tea on Saturday night...

Of course the Guru knew the knockout was highly unlikely.... In fairness, this eunuch couldn't dispose of a burnt out Felix Sturm, work it out my little chick peas... You know the truth is spoken by the Guru.

Anyway, Deontay Wilder will be putting his chin on the line again later tonight... Where does he find his opponents from??

Till next time Furball's.

hawkeyethenoo

flanna01 wrote: »

So my little poodle droppings....

That's the first of the Christmas cracker picks home and dry.... So much for the popular opinion that the Bugman would be knocked out by the machine....

There was more chance of the Mrs uttering some kind words over the tea on Saturday night...

Of course the Guru knew the knockout was highly unlikely.... In fairness, this eunuch couldn't dispose of a burnt out Felix Sturm, work it out my little chick peas... You know the truth is spoken by the Guru.

so why didn't you put chudinov points then if you were so confident.

flanna01

Hawkey.... You need to slow down and smell the cider!

For the benefit of Hawkey and the rest of the bewildered, permit me to elaborate on the structure of the annual Christmas Cracker..

The Christmas Cracker investment is built to cover all the expenses of the festive season. Due to this, I have taken as much, if indeed, not all the risk out of the named investment.

With the exception of Dillan Whyte & Tyson Fury meeting the canvas, I have the balance of the wager set as a win only format - Who cares in what fashion the Christmas Cracker pays out, just as long as the end result is 'Winner'.

I strongly suspect that Kell Brook will not need the score cards to determine his legacy... But I still opted for a win only. (It's Christmas!!)

The Christmas cracker is 15/1... That's right my little bottom wipes... Its the safest, surest thing since Frank Bruno's destruction at the hands of a young Mike Tyson...

To all the many pilgrims that have deposited there hard earned dole money on the Christmas Cracker... Fear not my little ruddy nosed half wits, the good times are coming...

The Guru

weemcd

Long live the king!

Mantis Toboggan

flanna01 wrote: »

Hawkey.... You need to slow down and smell the cider!

With the exception of Dillan Whyte & Tyson Fury meeting the canvas, I have the balance of the wager set as a win only format - Who cares in what fashion the Christmas Cracker pays out, just as long as the end result is 'Winner'.


The Christmas cracker is 15/1... That's right my little bottom wipes... Its the safest, surest thing since Frank Bruno's destruction at the hands of a young Mike Tyson...

To all the many pilgrims that have deposited there hard earned dole money on the Christmas Cracker... Fear not my little ruddy nosed half wits, the good times are coming...

The Guru

You do know that the Fury fight isn't going ahead righttt...?

akelly02

Did Deontay win after?

ASOT

akelly02 wrote: »

Did Deontay win after?

Yeah destroyed him for 11 rounds before getting the stoppage.

flanna01

@ Dennis Reynolds... (The legend in disguise?? What manner of deviant is this I ask myself??)

Dennis - Of course the Guru is aware of the postponement of the Fury kissing the canvas engagement..

But for yourself, and any other bewildered parties, let me explain how this plays out:

The Fury walloping has been pushed out until the end of November.. November 28th too be precise if the boxing chief scribes are to be believed..

Now.. The final fight for this year's Christmas Cracker is Canelo vs Cotto - This is around the 22nd of November I believe??

So.. When the investment is duly paid out, you immediately reinvest again on the Tyson Fury drilling the following week (The odds will still be the same). The only difference being, is that Fury will have broken his training camp for a week or so, and gone on an unmerciful bender... Not too much unlike the vast majority of this forums contributors...

Now my little scrotums, I hope I have eased your fears for a while..

The Guru

flanna01

Greetings to one and all...

So... The Christmas Cracker continues to plough forward. This weekend we have another segment to fulfil, that of Lucas Matthysse...

Too be honest, this is all too easy, it is indeed legalised robbery!!

My little cherubs, we may have to replace the mentally afflicted.. Tyson Fury's demolition appears to have been pushed out to February?? The Guru may have to shuffle the pack again.....?? But fear thee not my little rubber livered layabouts, the Christmas festivities will not be compromised, the Guru promised 15/1, and 15/1 it will be...

As the money keeps mounting, the more pilgrims jump aboard the Flanna Express... I can only say - Welcome to the good times, the thirsty, sober days are behind you... Have faith.

As the journey too the land of riches and liquor continues, I look down on my subjects with a feeling of pride, these very wretches of society will be partying full swing within the coming weeks... I will have brought happiness to one and all..

Until after the Matthysse fight....

Keep the faith pilgrims..

The Guru.

flanna01

Greetings Fur Ball's....

Like the dedicated shepherd that I am, I must stay awake at this ghastly hour of the morning to ensure one of my flock come home ok....

Yes my little degenerates... Lucas Matthysse is working on the Christmas Cracker tonight, his victory will result in 25% of the wager being done, and it isn't even Halloween yet..... I really am a God given gift to this forum of rabble and general loafers...

I trust the pilgrims are awake to keep me company during the graveyard shift.....??

I am missing a few of the regular punters, not showing up on any posts recently.... I must assume they are in prison?? Hope ye boys are out for Christmas...

The Guru

Mantis Toboggan

flanna01 wrote: »

Greetings Fur Ball's....


Yes my little degenerates... Lucas Matthysse is working on the Christmas Cracker tonight, his victory will result in 25% of the wager being done, and it isn't even Halloween yet..... I really am a God given gift to this forum of rabble and general loafers...

The Guru

Looks like another Christmas in the slums, washing myself in the river and drinking floor polish just for a buzz..

thanks Guru

keysersoze0330

At least the pilgrims in prison will be watered and fed over Xmas!

flanna01

Greetings.... It is with a heavy heart, and a light pocket that I address this forum tonight. There are no words to paint over the Christmas Cracker failure, and I offer no litigation nor blame for the said failure - Because that is what it was - A Failure.

Too the many that have followed me over the years, you will be aware that I don't run away and hide... I will always face the forum when things go south...

Two things stand out with regards to the Matthysse fight: 1) He tried to go all out for the KO in round seven, once this failed, he lost heart... He was still marginally ahead on points at this stage. 2) He could have beat the count, he chose not to...??

Shur it doesn't matter anymore... No use crying over spilt milk is there.

I now have to impose sanctions against myself... Everybody has to man up to their responsibilities.. even me.

Due to my incorrect selection in this years Christmas Cracker, I will no longer go by the term of Guru... And I would ask all fellow contributors not to refer to me as such again....

(Although I still consider myself to be of a higher social standing than all of you (much higher obviously!), I will ensure that my social graces do not undermine any of your comments)

Too the pilgrims that lost out on my investment.... My apologies.

Not sure where I go from here.... I expect some negative posts, that's ok.

I will either walk off into the Sunset, and never grace this forum with my presence ever again.....

Or, I may rise like a Phoenix among all ye turkeys and post the big one.... Yes my little Furball's, a big, ball's of steel, not for the faint hearted, messer's need not apply, Christmas Spectacular.....

On Christmas morn, all the raging, ruddy nosed, dead beats of society would be throwing bundles of cash around, far from sobriety, with little chance of seeing it again.... How the scrotums will celebrate in the street, the eunuchs will be singing...All around, the Christmas carols will be replaced by chants of praise for the Guru!

Till then... Your humble servant - Flanna01

flanna01

Greeting my faithful pilgrims...

My hour of reflection has passed, I no longer carry the burden of guilt for leading all ye misery's onto the wrong path..

I was quite prepared to leave this forum and never darken its doors again. After a few bad wagers, my very reputation as the boxing Guru came into dispute... (and rightly so). I posted a semi-retirement post (as seen above), and set off into the sunset to contemplate where it all went wrong...

After a lot of soul searching, I asked the patron saint of betting (St Jude), to show me a sign.. To give me a reason to return to the very forum that I was all but ousted from.... ?

It was on that very night, that I turned on Boxnation... And right before my eye's, the patron Saint of gamblers (St Jude), had left me the sign,,

There in front of me, was the new Andy Lee vs Billie Joe Saunders poster... Miraculously named as ...'The Christmas Cracker'!!!

I swilled the last of my buckfest and brandy down, and knew there was work to be done..

Coming soon - In conjunction with the righteous holy St Jude, I will be proud to present the new Flanna Christmas Cracker 2015!!

Get on board Fur ball's, this is a guaranteed, cast iron, Christmas Cracker (sponsored by one of the associates of none other than 'Himself'!)

Too be published soon.... (Starting 4th November and concluding in the televised main event - The Christmas Cracker!)

flanna01

Greetings my fellow Fur Ball's... As promised, the 2015 Christmas Cracker, sponsored by St Jude, and with the blessing of none other than 'Himself'.

The vast majority of the picks are deemed as a given, that is the beauty of it all.. With the exception of one selection, all matches are made on the 'win only ' format.

Ladies and Gentlemen, eunuchs and reprobates, and boxing fans around the world, I present to you, the 2015 Christmas Cracker, endorsed by the most senior of management, and guaranteed to romp home at 25/1...!! That's right my little half wit compatriots... 25/1!!!

The Christmas Cracker has been formulated to keep all the pilgrims at the edge of their seats (stools), for most weekends between now and pay out day... Each and every week, we will be jumping another hurdle until the grand final comes home to roost on 19th December... Aptly being hyped as the Christmas Cracker.. (Andy Lee vs BJ Saunders)

Like a soccer team, we have eleven selections to keep us busy....

So without further ado... I present to you, The 2015 Christmas Cracker...

4/11 Alexander Povetkin
7/11 Callum Smith
8/11 Tim Bradley
21/11 Martin Murray
22/11 Canelo
25/11 James DeGale
28/11 Klitschko
12/12 Joshua KO (Only KO of the sheet)
12/12 Roy Jones Jr - (cant lose in Russia!)
12/12 Chris Eubank Jr
19/12 BJ Saunders

And that's it my little turnips... A guaranteed 25/1 wager!

I will post my views on each fight later, I have 100% faith in this St Jude inspired investment... Once the winnings are cashed in, I will resume my position as the forum's undisputed boxing Guru once again... I look forward to looking down my nose at ye all once more....

Everybody on this forum must invest in this year's Christmas Cracker... It was by divine intervention that I returned to this forum, with St Jude and 'Himself' as the chosen one to lead ye wretches to the promised land...

It starts 4th November - Get aboard...

Until then...

The character formerly known as the Guru.

flanna01

As the majority of you start twitching and sweating, please permit me to dissect the Christmas Cracker for you...

/11 Alexander Povetkin - Poor old Wach isn't even getting paid for this fight, he took it to prevent his promotion team dragging him through the courts.. He even states that win, lose or draw he will be a free agent after this fight... Oh yeah, and his coach is not speaking to him!

7/11 Callum Smith - Rocky not singing from the same sheet here.

8/11 Tim Bradley - Teddy Atlas has worked wonders on Dessert Storm

21/11 Martin Murray - Andre is a big stiff yoke, Murray will win on heart alone.

22/11 Canelo - Cotto is good... Canelo is better, its that's simple.

25/11 James DeGale - Bute?? Pleeeease!

28/11 Klitschko - An easy nights work for the good Doctor.

12/12 Joshua KO (Only KO of the sheet) - Total mismatch!

12/12 Roy Jones Jr - (cant lose in Russia!) - If Jones got knocked out in Russia, he'd still be awarded the decision via points...

12/12 Chris Eubank Jr - I like Spike, but business is business... Lets call a spade a spade, Spike is going to get absolutely destroyed! (Kinda makes me sad....)

19/12 BJ Saunders - The man who took Chris Eubank Juniors zero won't be phased by the Limerick man... Saunders has an exceptional amateur record, has mixed it with the best.. I would have backed him at Thomond Park, now its in the UK, its a foregone conclusion...

So my fellow dumplings, it's time to grow a set of steel ball's, step up to the plate, and take a risk...... It's the Christmas Cracker!!

Johner

I like the look of this, agree on all of them. Would love to see Spike win but think he'll be soundly beaten on points and struggle to win a round.

weemcd

You really are too good to us. Not only the bet but the breakdown too.

Inspiring

akelly02

flanna01 wrote: »

As the majority of you start twitching and sweating, please permit me to dissect the Christmas Cracker for you...

/11 Alexander Povetkin - Poor old Wach isn't even getting paid for this fight, he took it to prevent his promotion team dragging him through the courts.. He even states that win, lose or draw he will be a free agent after this fight... Oh yeah, and his coach is not speaking to him!

7/11 Callum Smith - Rocky not singing from the same sheet here.

8/11 Tim Bradley - Teddy Atlas has worked wonders on Dessert Storm

21/11 Martin Murray - Andre is a big stiff yoke, Murray will win on heart alone.

22/11 Canelo - Cotto is good... Canelo is better, its that's simple.

25/11 James DeGale - Bute?? Pleeeease!

28/11 Klitschko - An easy nights work for the good Doctor.

12/12 Joshua KO (Only KO of the sheet) - Total mismatch!

12/12 Roy Jones Jr - (cant lose in Russia!) - If Jones got knocked out in Russia, he'd still be awarded the decision via points...

12/12 Chris Eubank Jr - I like Spike, but business is business... Lets call a spade a spade, Spike is going to get absolutely destroyed! (Kinda makes me sad....)

19/12 BJ Saunders - The man who took Chris Eubank Juniors zero won't be phased by the Limerick man... Saunders has an exceptional amateur record, has mixed it with the best.. I would have backed him at Thomond Park, now its in the UK, its a foregone conclusion...

So my fellow dumplings, it's time to grow a set of steel ball's, step up to the plate, and take a risk...... It's the Christmas Cracker!!

You are getting a christmas prostitute from me when this comes in

Andre 3000

Throw in Jose Aldo to beat Conor and you're gonna have the best Stephens night and new years of your life!

flanna01

Last 48hrs to get on this year's Christmas Cracker - Kicks off on Wednesday.... 25/1 guaranteed winner!

So Halloween is over for another year, that can only mean one thing... The Christmas lights will be going up, followed by the tone deaf drunkards singing seasonal Christmas Carols at chucking out time. It also means the start of the get rich quick seasonal investment...

As a final last touch to this years investment, I called into the local parochial house and asked that the selections be blessed... Father Dick Long was only too happy to oblige, and obviously placed his own stake accordingly..

My fellow Fur balls, this year's Christmas Cracker is buzzing with positive vibes, this can only mean one thing - We are on a winner, the liquor will be flowing, Christmas 2015 will be a blur for most pilgrims who climbed aboard the Flanna Express... By this very weekend, 25% of the investment will have played out... Leaving a steady flow of rock solid winners to lead us to the promised land on December 19th... (Incidentally, the same day I will be crowned the undisputed 'boxing Guru' for all eternity...)

I have not asked people to rob their Wives / Mothers handbags.. Nor have I asked ye to use this months mortgage payment ... The expectation is that that has already been considered and achieved without any prompts from myself...

Never has there been an easier 25/1 wager! This is akin to stealing out of the very coffers of Paddy Powers, Ladbrokes, Betfair, Boyles... and all the other legalised extortionists & racketeers currently running money scams on our high streets..

My little mince pies... It's time to step up to the plate and tighten that belt a notch. The good times are before us, but you must have the faith.. The bookies have made a mistake, they didn't have the vision to see the error of their ways.... All selections are still being accepted as an accumulator at a staggering 25/1 !!

Go forth my little pip squeaks, time is of the essence... The Christmas Cracker begins this Wednesday evening!

The journey begins in less that 48hrs

Are you in ????

flanna01

Last Call.....

24hrs left to get on the Flanna Christmas Cracker - 25/1 sure thing!!!!!

Time to grow some steel balls...

Faint heart never won fair maiden.......!

You have until tomorrow evening to times your investment by 25....!!

Last call,, From tomorrow onwards I will be dealing with the pilgrims that showed faith.... The rest of ye can revert back to the handbags and high heels forums....

Your fellow Fur Ball.. (status upgrade pending).

flanna01

Last Orders Gentlemen.... (believe me, the use of the word 'Gentlemen' is spoken in a sarcastic context)

6pm tonight is the cut off point.. You can't win it, if your not in it!!

25/1 still being accepted by the bookies, who are can't see the forest because the tree's are in the way.....

25/1 Furball's (that's more like it)... A quarter of this investment will have played out by the weekend... Easy pickings after that... This is the ultimate Christmas Cracker 2015...

The grains of sand are fast draining out of the hour glass..... 6pm - Or you have missed the train!

** Ps. What's all this nonsense about Eubank Jr being forced by matchroom to take the Spike fight? That he tried to avoid him? And that Spike has already won the mind games???....

Will the moronic few who are of that opinion, please leave this forum and drop anchor on the conspiracy section - You'll get along great there....

Sometimes... I really wonder why I humble myself to grace this forum...

That's it - It's Christmas!!

walshb

Wouldn't it be a bitch if Spike was the one to spoil the fun......

FTA69

walshb wrote: »

Wouldn't it be a bitch if Spike was the one to spoil the fun......

How do you think he'll get on?

walshb

FTA69 wrote: »

How do you think he'll get on?

I would love to see him KO Eubank. Love it. He is just not polished enough, and Eubank's beard seems somehwat sturdy. Spike can bang a bit, so you never know. Eubank is getting a littlt bit overrated I feel. He still should have enough to beat Spike. If Eubank cannot get Spike out of there then he may be in for a tough night via points.

efb

Switched to Lee and went with 7 folds up

boxer.fan

walshb wrote: »

I would love to see him KO Eubank. Love it. He is just not polished enough, and Eubank's beard seems somehwat sturdy. Spike can bang a bit, so you never know. Eubank is getting a littlt bit overrated I feel. He still should have enough to beat Spike. If Eubank cannot get Spike out of there then he may be in for a tough night via points.

if Spike can't find Eubank's chin then it will have to be a points win for junior. Saunders had his number all night long.

A Shaved Duck?

Callum Smith could let this bet down early, 11/4 in whats essentially a 50-50 fight with similar records.

Rocky is no eejit.