Anxiety and/or depression discussion.

chinacup

Dr.Alucard wrote: »

seriously, please do start talking to other people on the course, it gets better i promise you!! i dreaded going into my course everyday untill i bit the bullet and just started talking to people. I know its really hard, i suffer from social anxiety so sometimes im freaking out in my head, but im still forcing myself to talk to people and you know what, im actually getting a weird buzz out of it and smiling to myself in my head after doing it and also people have started to warm up and talk to me which also give me a little buzz. try it

Thanks Dr Alucard, that's great to hear you're making progress, well done. Took a day off myself because the anxiety was horrible this morn but it ended up that I actually got my work and thoughts back in perspective so I'm glad I did. I'm more hope for tomorrow now.

Roquentin

chinacup wrote: »

I've found the more fear inducing things I attempt the better it is in the long run but I can totally relate to the anxiety killing things. Sometimes the anxiety is just too much and you need to just keep it simple. Changing routine is hard no doubt, is there something specific you wanted to do lately where it held you back?

meeting a friend would cause anxiety. job interviews and training. uncertainty is my enemy

cloudatlas

Stressful situation today so I have stomach pains and a sore back in anticipation.

BringBackMick

cloudatlas wrote: »

Stressful situation today so I have stomach pains and a sore back in anticipation.

Par for the course.

Avoid any tea/coffee. Drink lots of water and I find some milk can help but only if you like it. Avoid food too, maybe a sugary lucozade if you can stomach it. You'll be hungry like a horse after the 'event' Good Luck

cloudatlas

BringBackMick wrote: »

Par for the course.

Avoid any tea/coffee. Drink lots of water and I find some milk can help but only if you like it. Avoid food too, maybe a sugary lucozade if you can stomach it. You'll be hungry like a horse after the 'event' Good Luck

I drank a lot of boiled water and then I had some whiskey afterwards so I've almost recovered :pac:

chinacup

Roquentin wrote: »

meeting a friend would cause anxiety. job interviews and training. uncertainty is my enemy

Ya same as myself tbh. Any normal thing to be anxious about except ten fold!

Gongoozler

How do you stop your anxiety affecting other people? I mean I get grouchy with people when I feel under pressure, which isn't fair if the person hasn't done anything to contribute to the pressure. How do you stop yourself being affected by the anxiety, so that it doesn't effect other people.

LegacyUser

Why do I despise myself? Am I depressed do you think?

Roquentin

Gongoozler wrote: »

How do you stop your anxiety affecting other people? I mean I get grouchy with people when I feel under pressure, which isn't fair if the person hasn't done anything to contribute to the pressure. How do you stop yourself being affected by the anxiety, so that it doesn't effect other people.

i avoid everyone. no people=no anxiety.....

kronsington

Hope everybody here is doing ok this week. I've found this thread very helpul since since i started looking and reading it recently, as well as educating myself on anxiety and related issues.. I am much more mindful now than ever... I can "see" the way i am acting when interacting with others (my body language, fidgeting, eye contact) and work on it.. Even making small minor changes is making a difference..

handbagmad

No sleeps tonight...all or nothing with sleep lately

stuba

Supposed to be going out in Limerick tonight, starting to get anxious about it now though. Can feel my stomach starting to knott. Any tips for me?

Really want to go but really don't want to keel over when I get there either.

CZ 453

stuba wrote: »

Supposed to be going out in Limerick tonight, starting to get anxious about it now though. Can feel my stomach starting to knott. Any tips for me?

Really want to go but really don't want to keel over when I get there either.

Keep yourself busy today. Not busy in preparation for going out but busy as in doing something else

Mental Mickey

My GF suffers with depression. She's going through a really tough time at the moment. She has counselling sessions to help with, but she is really low at the moment.

Any suggestions as to what I can do to help?

Roquentin

Mental Mickey wrote: »

My GF suffers with depression. She's going through a really tough time at the moment. She has counselling sessions to help with, but she is really low at the moment.

Any suggestions as to what I can do to help?

watch a bit of comedy on netflix. laughter is a great medicine and i find it improves my mood.

kronsington

I found this quite helpful.. It touches on the differences between empathy and sympathy.. This is related to breast cancer, But can be applied to anything really, and might be helpful to anyone looking to support somebody fount through a difficult patch right now

http://blog.thebreastcancersite.com/the-power-of-empathy/?utm_source=social&utm_medium=bcaware&utm_campaign=the-power-of-empathy&utm_term=20140925

handbagmad

And I've been a fool and I've been blind,
I could never leave the past behind....

Its always darkest before the dawn.

Esel

And dawn always comes...

Dark now, light after
Black (yeah), for a while
Eventually, a small smile
Then, maybe,... laughter.

Adopt a pet, maybe a small dog
Yeah, you may get wet when you fall off the log.
Hey, dry yourself off, get right back on that horse.
Try to remember that you control the force.

Cats may not like cat food
But they usually come back.
Dogs like home; a bone to chew is good;
Food is even better -even hard tack.

So - too long, didn't read;
Couldn't even stop to think,
Finding it too hard to even breathe?
Eyes still work - you can still blink.

Copyright Esel on the above verses, and all previous lyrics by Esel.

kronsington

Feeling the anxiety a lot this week. Don't know anyone else, but for me a lot of the time it's triggered by everyday things, everyday errands.. For example, I've been getting calls from mobile provider in ireland (im in Canada) about an unpaid bill. Got one at 4am ( 12pm irish time) and haven't slept since. Admittedly I am bad with money ( like father like son) and am a bit behind on some bills dice I came out here, and I'll this sorted. While this is not a big deal or a major issue, a little things like this puts me in a spin. Then after thinking about it he a recurring pattern: interviews, going about everyday, calling a person about something/query and a lot of other run of the mill stuff triggers it. I've always been called a "worrier", I didn't take offence to it as my grandfather was the same and people who knew him said we were alike in that way. In many ways, I handle the more serious stuff better than the run of the mill things. So much so that I don't even really answer my phone much. Private number? Forget about it.

I've read about how being disorganised, having a cluttered mind and space can be a sign of an anxious mind.. Indoor have much money, but over the allowed a simple student credit card bill build up and have barely touched it. As sad my phone bill is unpaid. Have another student loan building up all the time. The room in the house is so untidy. I give out about others untidiness but I'm a state. And then I compare myself to my father at home- who's is in a financial jam himself on a far bigger level- and last time I was at his house i counted over 30 unopened letters from banks and solicitors etc I don't want my life to be run with this head in the sand mentality like his is.

My dad worries me a lot. He's one of these guys who won't accept he has problems and pretends like everything is fine. Our relationship is poor enough these days and we haven't talked since I moved to Canada apart from the off trivial text. We've never been close. Always much closerto my mother. Even though I'm an adult now, my parents recent although long time coming marriage breakup was quite traumatic. Around this same time we had to sell our family home and my father attempted auicide after a particularly hicoous fight with mother. I say attempted, I think it was heat of the moment. There's no doubt my brother and I are damaged from growing up in an environment like this. And now we're dealing with my mothers recent breast cancer diagnosis. I know life is unfair and there's so explanation for any of it, but there are days when I look at all this and a lot more and just think why has all this happened? I know it's selfish or whatever.. My "friend" ( the toxic one I mentioned before) said I dwell on this too much. He basically trivialised all this. Maybe i do dwell a little ( like I am now) but **** me, these past few years have been a nightmare. I can feel a rage inside me at times that's just a part of me. I can be very irritable at times, quiet moody despite being a pretty decent normal and funny guy most of the time..

Anyway that's my ramble for now as I can't sleep.. For me, I can only so much for myself but i am going to look into some CBT to try talk all this through with a professional

Mental Mickey

I'm bringing the OH for something to eat after work, and also to get her hair done!! She doesn't know it yet. I've told her I've booked a surprise for her. :-)

handbagmad

Mental Mickey wrote: »

I'm bringing the OH for something to eat after work, and also to get her hair done!! She doesn't know it yet. I've told her I've booked a surprise for her. :-)

I hope to find someone like you some day.
Very sweet, hope it cheers her up
Good on you

alaskayoung

I feel like I'm losing my mind. Everything feels so wrong. My mind is torturing me. I don't even feel like its my own anymore. I don't even feel like I'm the one making these decisions, just the host of something else

On another note, had a moment of realization today. I've been feeling down for quite awhile about my lack of friends or more so, lack of people I feel close to. I always assumed that it was because I wasn't a very likable person or whatever. But anyway, it suddenly came to me that it's not that I'm not an unlikable person, it's that I expect people to feel close to me while I put absolutely zero effort or energy into the friendship. Expect them to always approach me while I only do so when it suits me. I'm not sure I even want friends though, it's more the idea of friends that I like. I honestly don't have the energy to talk to people most of the time. Rambling..

Roquentin

alaskayoung wrote: »

I feel like I'm losing my mind. Everything feels so wrong. My mind is torturing me. I don't even feel like its my own anymore. I don't even feel like I'm the one making these decisions, just the host of something else

On another note, had a moment of realization today. I've been feeling down for quite awhile about my lack of friends or more so, lack of people I feel close to. I always assumed that it was because I wasn't a very likable person or whatever. But anyway, it suddenly came to me that it's not that I'm not an unlikable person, it's that I expect people to feel close to me while I put absolutely zero effort or energy into the friendship. Expect them to always approach me while I only do so when it suits me. I'm not sure I even want friends though, it's more the idea of friends that I like. I honestly don't have the energy to talk to people most of the time. Rambling..

I am the same.... lots of cigarettes before having to meet people, talk to them, entertain them etc. im just not a people person. i can meet them in low dozes like a recovering alcoholic who goes on a monthly binge. Id say once every two months i come out of my shell and meet people and then disappear again. ah well its who i am and i wont apologize for it or i wont be like others want me to be

alaskayoung

Roquentin wrote: »

I am the same.... lots of cigarettes before having to meet people, talk to them, entertain them etc. im just not a people person. i can meet them in low dozes like a recovering alcoholic who goes on a monthly binge. Id say once every two months i come out of my shell and meet people and then disappear again. ah well its who i am and i wont apologize for it or i wont be like others want me to be

I'm not alone Yes, I feel like my only desire for friends is to conform to society's expectations rather than to satisfy my own personal needs. Right now at least..

Dr.Alucard

i think i get what ye mean, Meeting up with people can take a lot of energy, for me at least, i am most at peace when im chilling out on my own either on my laptop or watching tv. Before this is was quite the opposite i used to be getting my energy from hanging with people. mad how i went form one end of the scale to the other.

Roquentin

Dr.Alucard wrote: »

i think i get what ye mean, Meeting up with people can take a lot of energy, for me at least, i am most at peace when im chilling out on my own either on my laptop or watching tv. Before this is was quite the opposite i used to be getting my energy from hanging with people. mad how i went form one end of the scale to the other.

when i was young i had a close group of friends. In secondry school and college, but we each went our separate ways, sort of like the film Stand by Me. i think looking back i was just pretending though. Pretending to be happy with such a life. Deep down and it took me a while to realize it, that it wasnt for me. I prefer just being alone. Would love to go off and live in alaska

Mental Mickey

handbagmad wrote: »

I hope to find someone like you some day.
Very sweet, hope it cheers her up
Good on you

She loved it. She loves her new hairdo!!! :-)

handbagmad

Mental Mickey wrote: »

She loved it. She loves her new hairdo!!! :-)

nawww That's great

Killer_banana

So I contemplated ditching my job, house everything and just moving to Edinburgh earlier. I felt like two people were arguing 'cause while I knew it was a terrible idea part of me was really excited and kept saying I should do it, that I was being boring for not doing it. It's still in the back of my mind and I still kind of want to do it. Doctor said I'm not bipolar so don't know what this is but it's really scary. I'm also super dizzy but I just got over a bug so that could be the tale end of that, I'm not sure. I kind of feel like I'm losing it. Having first contact meeting with counsellor this week (although after that I'll have to wait a few months) and also seeing GP so will mention to one or both.

chinacup

Killer_banana wrote: »

So I contemplated ditching my job, house everything and just moving to Edinburgh earlier. I felt like two people were arguing 'cause while I knew it was a terrible idea part of me was really excited and kept saying I should do it, that I was being boring for not doing it. It's still in the back of my mind and I still kind of want to do it. Doctor said I'm not bipolar so don't know what this is but it's really scary. I'm also super dizzy but I just got over a bug so that could be the tale end of that, I'm not sure. I kind of feel like I'm losing it. Having first contact meeting with counsellor this week (although after that I'll have to wait a few months) and also seeing GP so will mention to one or both.

I can relate to that up and run - in need of a fresh start feeling. I have yet to find out whether it is an instinct you should follow or ignore.