Gerry Ryan Megathread!

Armin_Tamzarian

2. The Gerry Ryan show is less annoying than the Panel.
3. The Gerry Ryan show is 3 hours long, let's be grateful it's not 4 hours long.

Here's a class Gerry Ryan joke stolen from another thread, it's an old one but a good one, thanks to randylonghorn.

Gerry Ryan pwned!
I'm sure this never happened ... but it should have ...!

The Gerry Ryan radio show was holding a competition (for one hour only) for the listeners' best jokes.

One Dublin bloke rang in with only 5 mins to the end of the show...

Caller: "An amazing thing happened to me recently. I had just bought a top of the range 67,000 pounds worth of Mercedes Benz. I was thrilled with the car. It had every extra. Revolving wheels, see-through windscreen, power assisted ash-tray, it was fully loaded."

Gerry: "That's very nice but, have you got a joke to tell or what?

Caller: "Hang on will you. You'll really love this; I drove out from the dealer and was driving down the road, when I noticed that there was no radio in the car. Can you imagine that? No feckin' radio in a car that cost me nearly seventy grand! So I turned right around and headed back."

Gerry: "Get on with it will you, I've only a couple of minutes left and we've to squeeze in an ad break too."

Caller: "Relax. I guarantee you this is brilliant. So anyway, I go back to the salesman and ask him where's the bleedin' radio and that it better not be extra. He started laughing and told me that there was, in fact, state of the art voice activated radio fitted in the car. He showed me how it worked. It was UNBELIEVABLE! All you have to do is say 'radio on' and it turns on, radio off' and it turns off. It's bleedin' magic. You say 'Ballads' and it plays Ballads, 'Rock 'n' Roll' and a rock & roll station comes on. I've never seen anything like it."

Gerry: "You're wasting our feckin' time here, I'll have to move on and try to fit in a quickie before the end of the show."

Caller: "Hang on Gerry I'm nearly finished."

Gerry: "Just finish it will you."

Caller: "So I drove off again even happier than earlier on. Then you won't believe what happened. This idiot passed me on the outside and clipped me bumper on his way back in. 'Stupid B0ll*x!' I shouted and you'll never guess what happened."

Gerry: "What happened?"

Caller: "The Gerry Ryan Show came on the feckin' radio."

The caller was cut-off....

deadhead13

Gerry Ryan has increased his listenership fiqures by 1,000. We are struck with him forever :eek: - I'm off to lie down in a dark room.

Utopia Parkway

deadhead13 wrote: »

Gerry Ryan has increased his listenership fiqures by 1,000. We are struck with him forever :eek: - I'm off to lie down in a dark room.

He'll interpret that as people backing him on his wages issue.

deadhead13

I know. Sickening isn't it.

magnumlady

He just bought 1,000 radios and tuned them all in to himself:rolleyes:

aierlan1000

One thing that bugs me about Gerry Ryan, Tubridy, Pat Kenny and Co. is that they suggest that the listeners they get is entirely down to them and this is how they justify their wages. Surely the fact that they are on the national broadcaster with well financed and highly produced shows is the real reason they get such high listenerships. If Gerry Ryan wasn't there but a similar show was put on in it's place, I'm sure the listenership wouldn't collapse. All these guys need to take a massive paycut. There is no way they can justify what they earn. If they're so great, they should set up their own commercial stations and then produce the same advertising revenue based on their talents. They are all completely overpaid and overrated.

mod snip: Blog pimp removed.

yoshytoshy

I've been listening to gerry ryan for years ,he's no way near as funny as he use to be.

ManFromAtlantis

yoshytoshy wrote: »

I've been listening to gerry ryan for years ,he's no way near as funny as he use to be.

maybe you've changed.

yoshytoshy

ManFromAtlantis wrote: »

maybe you've changed.

Aye ,I have to be sure and so has the gerry ryan;)

Edit: I still think he's good ,but I don't think it's fair to keep new talent away.

fryup

well so far this year, he's seems to be very chirpy & full of life......so.....he must be getting his end away with the new one;)

Our man in Havana

Hopefully there will be no international incident.

humberklog

I see he's feathering his new nest nicely. Whilst some D.4 bizzies were nagging a ugly austentatious building proposal off their front lawns another rather ugly and austentatious being was unpacking the black plastic bags of clothes from the 8series into their invirons. But he's nestling nicely by plugging Donnybrook Fair at every turn this week.

ManFromAtlantis

so hes a d4 resident ?

humberklog

ManFromAtlantis wrote: »

so hes a d4 resident ?

So the word is.
He's moved from the parent's old spot.

maxwell smart

So we will now be regaled with tales of Roly's, Donnybrook Fare and drinks in the Horseshoe Bar? Please God Nooooooooooo!

I suppose he will be name dropping all the international "embassy belt" parties he will be going to now?

ManFromAtlantis

yea im sure we'll hear about embassy parties or the loike.

magnumlady

fryup wrote: »

well so far this year, he's seems to be very chirpy & full of life......so.....he must be getting his end away with the new one;)

ewwww I hope she's got a bag on her head and the lights off...yuck:eek:

ManFromAtlantis

you're not a big fan of gerry, then.

Armin_Tamzarian

magnumlady wrote: »

ewwww I hope she's got a bag on her head and the lights off...yuck:eek:

She'd be safer using two bags.
One for him and one for her...
...In case her's falls off...

Our man in Havana

Ah now lads.

She is quite a good looking woman.

Armin_Tamzarian

Bond-007 wrote: »

Ah now lads.

She is quite a good looking woman.

The bag's are there for her benefit...

juuge

Ryan is the highest paid in RTE evn though he has the worst listenership figures - strange that!

ibarelycare

juuge wrote: »

Ryan is the highest paid in RTE evn though he has the worst listenership figures - strange that!

He has far from the worst listener figures on RTE! If you're talking about RTE talk shows, then he still has more listeners than Pat Kenny and Ryan Tubridy. And as far as I'm aware, he isn't the highest paid there either.

deadhead13

He is the only not to take a pay cut - "because he's worth it"

jonny oxford

juuge wrote: »

Ryan is the highest paid in RTE evn though he has the worst listenership figures - strange that!

What are you on about?

That is completely untrue on both counts.

ibarelycare

deadhead13 wrote: »

He is the only not to take a pay cut - "because he's worth it"

Ryan Tubridy didn't take a pay cut either.

deadhead13

Whatever you think of Tubridy's "charitable donation" at least he saw a need to make a gesture, given RTEs and the countrys current financial situation.
Gerry on the other hand, since his ill-advised outburst, has just stonewalled the very notion that his pay should be cut. Despite the fact, the revenue form his show has decreased by a third in the past year.

ibarelycare

deadhead13 wrote: »

Whatever you think of Tubridy's "charitable donation" at least he saw a need to make a gesture, given RTEs and the countrys current financial situation.
Gerry on the other hand, since his ill-advised outburst, has just stonewalled the very notion that his pay should be cut. Despite the fact, the revenue form his show has decreased by a third in the past year.

Where did that information come from? I'm not being smart, I'm genuinely interested

deadhead13

Sunday world(I know) 1st feb. Site doesn't have an archive. It was in the city slicker column - a source had shown him documents showing a 35% fall in revenue. If it were untrue I'm sure Gerry Ryan or RTE would have denied it the following monday.

ManFromAtlantis

would you google gerry