Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
The Fathers Thread
Options
Comments
-
-
-
-
-
-
Advertisement
-
-
-
-
Forget everything that you've learned from the TV about labour and childbirth. Aside from pain and a baby at the end, every portrayal of the process on film is wrong and misleadingI have to admit though I am absolutly terrified about the birth itself. I know I have to stay calm for her but my mind will be a wash of worry and anxiety for everything to be ok I get nervous even thinking about it. Any words of wisdom from the wise?
Get your hands on a good baby book that's aimed only at fathers, so you can understand how the process will work from your end and how it will appear to you.
I've the same, first child due at the end of October and had our first prenatal class last night. The physio had a great way of describing labour and contractions as a bit like a wave pool. At first you have some random ripples, then some small waves, and it progressively builds up to bigger and bigger waves.
The key things I took away from last night were:
- the average time from the onset of labour to birth is about 12 hours, 90% of which is spent doing nothing except coping with contractions - so no pushing or anything, just learning to manage the discomfort (a mild word for it) of contracting.
- Once dilation is complete (after about 11 hours on average), you're 45 minutes to an hour away from a baby appearing.
To me this basically said, "Don't panic". From the onset of labour, you have lots of time. If you get a phone call in work, you don't have to break every traffic light on the way home and barge in a sweaty mess. The process is quite slow and if you can be aware of it and the various signs, then you can be in control of it and your emotions.
No doubt your wife and yourself have heard stories from other people of their horrendous birth, from parents of 36 hours of labour and from random stories on the internet of women who went into labour and gave birth 13 minutes later on the kitchen floor.
These are the statistical outsiders. And the reason you hear about them and and not all of the "everything went as expected" stories is precisely because they're the statistical outsiders.
Don't worry too much about this, you're still only 30/31 weeks? I remember at a small scan (28 weeks I think), the doctor said that the baby was breech which might be something to be concerned about, and we almost laughed at him. There's plenty of time yet for the baby to turn. Breech at 34 weeks is the time to start considering alternatives, and still breech at 36 weeks is generally the time when you decide for definite if you want to turn the baby or go for a c-section. Babies can still turn later than this, but since 38 weeks is considered "term", the doctor may want to avoid a breech birth and schedule a C-section for the first day of the 38th week.We had a check up last week and the doctors told us that the baby is in a breach position at the moment, if he doesn't move around in the next few weeks they are going to try and move him manually , herself really doesn't want to have this done as it's meant to be pretty painfull so were hopefull he turns himself otherwise we may be looking at a section.
The baby turns quite quickly, so she could wake up practically any morning to find it's in the correct position.0 -
Did our last parenting class last night. Overall it was 2 with the physio for birthing positions and stuff, and 3 with a midwife, discussing labour, feeding and looking after a newborn. Totally worth it, especially for someone like me who's never had to spend more than five minutes alone with a baby. Lots of info I knew already, but then lots of "on the ground" stuff to fill the gaps in what I knew.
Last night at one point she was discussing "resuming sexual relations" (if you have the energy) and recommended that you wait until you've had the six-week post natal checkup to make sure everything's OK. "But you don't have to. We've had women come in for their six-week checkup and discover that they're pregnant again" :eek:
I think that, more than anything, is the scariest thing I heard in any of the classes 0 -
Advertisement
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
Have enjoyed reading through most of this thread, some great info here, so thanks to everyone for contributing.
We found out a few days ago that we're expecting our first. It's already been a long road, with a couple of years of fertility treatment, so it's just great to finally reach this stage. We're both very worried about everything that could go wrong (especially as it's still very early days) but also both excited and scared and in shock!
Fingers crossed everything goes well between now and June...
J.0 -
-
Six whole days for me. Still hasn't really sunk in tbh, I'm not feeling the "imminence" of it yet. In my head it's still "miles away" like it was 6 months ago. Maybe when I have trouble sleeping next Tuesday, it'll have sunk in.
I'm very excited though.
My wife is equally glad and pissed off she's still working. Pissed off because she's sore and uncomfortable and tired and just wants the baby here now. Glad because she would be climbing the walls if she didn't have something to do. She only gets four real days maternity leave before the birth and she has already filled them up with going for dinners and coffees and such 0 -
Advertisement
-
-
-
-
-
Congrats to you and your girlfriend Capri86! Has it sunk in yet? We're slowly getting used to my wife actually being pregnant, but I don't think we're used to that meaning we'll have a baby in June yet!
J.
I know the feeling. It has sunk in a bit alright but it's a great feeling. I forget about it in work sometimes and then when I remember I can't believe it. It's all good. I'm hoping the next few months fly in!0 -
-
-
-
-
Advertisement
-
My beautiful baby girl born via csection on Wednesday. Totally scheduled and still scary as hell.
Funny how quickly you get into the swing of it. Hopefully bringing her home today, I'm utterly shattered but totally besotted
Her Mum got her first sleep last night after 72 hours awake, she's a trooper, I'm in awe.0
Advertisement