Womens Attitudes in Nightclubs

Húrin

Alarums wrote: »

I think Irish nightclubs are fairly depressing places for lads a lot of the time. They go there because the pubs have shut and they want to keep drinking and they have the faintest dying ember of a hope that maybe this will be the night they finally find someone in the nightclub who will shag them. Then they go to the club, the conversation between them dies as nobody can hear anything and one liners tend to lose their subtle nuances when they are shouted into someones ear. Then you can see all the groups of men, not talking to each other but instead looking longlingly at the women dancing on the floor. The women are having a good time dancing but quite a few of them are just there to have a dance and a laugh and hope the lads in the place stay away and don't bother them. It seems like an expensive waste of time for a lot of men to be honest.

That's the whole idea. The only thing to do in a nightclub is just to rub bodies against each other rather than people trying to talk their way into someone else's bed. It's a totally uncivilised way of interacting with people, so I gave up nightclubs.

Dinter

Húrin wrote: »

It's a totally uncivilised way of interacting with people.

And yet if done right it cuts through all the bullshit of having to "date" or "talk". You might even get a nice breakfast out of it.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Dinter wrote: »

Yep, don't listen to them talking about their boyfriend problems. You're a man you don't care about relationships.

The only advice you can give to anything is "let's go out and drink, it'll make you feel better". That "what should I do" crap is real friendship zone and there are women friends to deal with that.

Oh unless you start reading the worst motives into everything the boyfriend does. That's hilarious!

Friend: "He says he's to work late".

Ikky: "You know a third of people meet their partner through work don'tr you"?

Friend: He said he'd a headache last night."

Ikky: "You know tension headaches can be a sign of a man stressed about conducting an affair?"

point 1 - I know, but I can;t shut them up either!
point 2 - we're usually already out drinking by the time this starts.
point 3 - I like the worst-motives idea. Very clever.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Dragan wrote: »

Yore ma?

I'm running out of comebacks for yore ma

mossyj

Wibbs wrote: »

People dress for comfort, practicality, increasing sexual attraction and as a means to fit in with whatever social group they feel allied to. There is an element of competition in that group as well.

When people say they dress for themselves what does that actually mean? It means that on one level dressing a certain way makes them feel better. Why does it make them feel better? It makes them feel better because it makes them accepted and admired by their group and those they wish to attract. It's a chicken and egg situation.

Women as the peacocks dress as much to impress other women as to impress men. Two women show up to a party wearing the same dress? Aaaawkward and nastiness may ensue. Two men show up in the same shirt and trousers? Bugger all. Maybe a joke about it. That's why the question "does my arse look big in this" can never be really answered by men, as it's more a case of "will other women think I've a fat arse and bitch about it".

In our society women dress up more than the men. They are by and large the peacocks. In other societies it's the men. Even the expression to "dress up" suggests increasing whatever signals he or she wishes to express to the group. By doing so in a sexually charged social environment will attract attention from those in that environment. Throw in lack of inhibition from alcohol etc. In which case, while it is at times irritating when unwelcome it is hardly unexpected.

If you look at the extremes, say a woman dressed in fúck me heels, a mini skirt that barely covers her arse and a low cut top that exposes her charms. She would have to be naive(dense really) in the extreme to think that she will not attract sexually charged attention from men. After all that is what that mode of dress is primarily designed to do. It's not for comfort, its hardly practical and it's certainly not (directly) aimed at women. Now it may make her feel better about herself, but it does so because it makes her feel higher value in the attraction stakes. The same woman in a pair of baggy dungarees is not going to garner the same attention. Simple as that.

In an ideal world men would be respectful and polite and ogling and unwelcome comments would not happen. Sadly we don't live in an ideal world and have to at times accept that. I'm not going to march down the Falls road in a Union Jack tee shirt, though it is my "right" to do so. I would expect unwanted attention. A clumsy example to be sure, but not a million miles away.

Men should have manners and cop on. sadly enough of them don't. Women should have manners when dealing with someone who is being polite to them, but again sadly enough of them don't.

Oh yea, YORE MA dresses like a slappa.

+1

seahorse

Publin wrote: »

Well that bloke you described in the example sounds like a plank. The situation the OP described was quite different I think you'll admit. If you and your mates hate being hit on so much, I don't get why you still go to niteclubs then (I'm not questioning your right to do so, or to have a drink, dance and enjoy yourself, but if it's SO off-putting would you not just stay in a late bar or do something else instead, as you know what's going to happen in a niteclub from experience)?

By the way, I've no issue with girls telling some persistent, creepy guy who won't take no for an answer to f**k off. I'm talking about it being your first response in reply to a guy politely approaching you. Which is why the OP posted.

Yeah I get what you’re saying Publin; of course there is a difference in the example I cited and the one in the original post. The point I’m making though, is that if a woman has had enough of the type of experiences I’ve described that’ll inevitably raise the likelihood of men having the type of experience the OP has described.

You assumed that experience I relayed had to have happened in a nightclub; well, to me that just shows how out of touch a lot of men are when it comes to what women are forced to deal with in any environment involving men and alcohol. I rarely ever go to nightclubs anymore; there’s far too high a ratio of desperate-for-their-hole drunken arseholes in them in my experience, and I couldn’t tell you the last time I wore a dress or skirt on a night out. I only ever wear tailored jeans anymore because I’ve found that if you show your legs some men seem to take that as though you had ‘GIZ A RIDE’ emblazoned down either side of them. That prick who tried to tell me I’d no right not to cheat on my partner with him on account of my bloke not being physically present said so in a regular pub, and it wasn’t a late bar either.

seahorse

norrie rugger wrote: »

I was home recently, in a club with my girlfriend. Everytime she went to tge dancefloor the same 2 girls would come over. Does that give me the right to tell them to **** off??? Or be polite and say "I'm not interested"?? If they continue, I can be rude to them but not to the next person

Of course you’ve every right to tell them to fukoff, given they can see you’re with your partner and are therefore insulting you, her, and your relationship. Telling the pair of them to fukoff in that situation would be fairly mandatory; I’d go one step further and tell them to buy a couple of vibrators if they’re that fukin desperate.

Shryke

seahorse wrote: »

I’d go one step further and tell them to buy a couple of vibrators if they’re that fukin desperate.

Someone needs a sedative.

hottstuff

Sandor wrote: »

Someone needs a sedative.

Or a Fleshlight.

Honey-ec

hottstuff wrote: »

Or a Fleshlight.

23 pages and we've finally had the best post EVER!

I LOLed...

Publin

seahorse wrote: »

Yeah I get what you’re saying Publin; of course there is a difference in the example I cited and the one in the original post. The point I’m making though, is that if a woman has had enough of the type of experiences I’ve described that’ll inevitably raise the likelihood of men having the type of experience the OP has described.

Just because you've a few bad experiences doesn't mean you should have "f**k off" as your automatic response. I've held doors open, or given up a seat on the bus/train for lots of people who didn't say thanks. Doesn't mean I won't hold a door open or give up my seat again, just in case they lack manners. Just as you shouldn't assume that a guy approaching you is going to be rude just because the last guy who approached you had no manners.

seahorse wrote: »

You assumed that experience I relayed had to have happened in a nightclub; well, to me that just shows how out of touch a lot of men are when it comes to what women are forced to deal with in any environment involving men and alcohol. That prick who tried to tell me I’d no right not to cheat on my partner with him on account of my bloke not being physically present said so in a regular pub, and it wasn’t a late bar either.

You're drinking in the wrong pubs so I think.

javaboy wrote: »

The attitude from some women here is ridiculous. Men aren't allowed talk to a woman unless there is reciprocal eye contact. But then somebody said if he's not a looker he can make up for it with his wit and charm. So how exactly does he get this reciprocal eye contact going if he's not the most handsome of guys?

Tbh it sounds a bit shallow. And anybody who says why can't a girl not go out to a nightclub without being chatted up is being naive. Women should be able to go out without being harassed certainly but a lot of people seem to be equating striking up a conversation with harassment.

Thanks, I'm glad someone understood the point I was making .

St Bill wrote: »

Yes he does sound like a plank, and I totally agree with the idea that we shouldn't generalise Irish men.

However, the girl in the OP's story sounds like a plank too, so I think it would also be a good idea not to generalise Irish women.

I think it I have the gist now....Irish boy approaches Irish woman and is told to f... off. Now instead of the Irish boy realising that the Irish girl is a bint and thanking his lucky stars he didn't get involved with her, he assumes that all Irish women are the same. He tries to approach some other Irish girls, but he now has a bad attitude towards Irish women (which I've seen to a great extent in this thread) and so once again he's going to be told to f... off. Cue thread in After Hours.

Well you're reading a bit too much into the OPs post I think. I'm taking what he said at face value. He could well have just approached an Irish girl in a niteclub, in a polite manner, and was told to "f**k off". Obviously he didn't take to kindly to it, and probably was in the back of his mind of the rest of the night and made the night out less enjoyable.

The OP never said that he tried to approach other girls after that, but if he's going to bother chatting them up, he's hardly going over with a "bad attitude" towards them!

I'd also like to point out that the kind of guys who would take offence to this sort of treatment are likely to be the type of guys who are decent and polite and don't deserve to be spoken to in this manner. From the details given, the OP didn't try to be macho or even throw out an abusive comment even after he was told to f off for no reason. Whereas if some guy comes over all sleazy and doesn't take no for an answer, he knows he deserves it, and doesn't let the "fook off" response ruin his night (as he expects it) and off he goes to annoy more girls.

seahorse

Publin wrote: »

Just because you've a few bad experiences doesn't mean you should have "f**k off" as your automatic response.

Could you quote where I say that it does please, since that's what you seem to be saying.

Publin wrote: »

You're drinking in the wrong pubs so I think.

Well think on. There was nothing wrong with the pub I was in; plenty wrong with one of the arseholes in it though, and in my experience there are no shortage of those in all manner of establishments where alcohol is served.

Tha Gopher

UnReg2008 wrote: »

Its only Irish women that do it as well. Talking to polish girls etc is no problem. They are very down to earth and will chat away. Me and my mates have a laugh about it but it happens a lot and i'm definately not a sleazebag and don't understand womens reactions sometimes.

You were trying to ride her, nothing more.

If you happen to get talking because of some common interaction, say, for example, the barman tries to serve you first but you point to a girl who was there beforehand....yes, legit convo may arise. If you are pissed because you got the elbow off some random bird who you simply went up to after thinking christ Id rattle the muff off her, you hafta be having a laugh.



As for Polish girls, I cant drag any of my mates to decent electro nights in the likes of Zanzibar because all the girls are E European. Cue attempts to strike up convo with women who largely either speak little English or cant comprehend the accent, and all for to find out she has a boyfriend anyway, like most of them. Therefore, nobody wants to go. If Irish men love Polish women as much as boards seem to show how come there are very few at these clubs? Id go for the decent music and lookers regardless of nationality but you would have a 1000 times better chance of pulling in a club full of Irish girls than one full of Poles.

seahorse

Tha Gopher wrote: »

You were trying to ride her, nothing more.

If you happen to get talking because of some common interaction, say, for example, the barman tries to serve you first but you point to a girl who was there beforehand....yes, legit convo may arise. If you are pissed because you got the elbow off some random bird who you simply went up to after thinking christ Id rattle the muff off her, you hafta be having a laugh.

+ 1

Tha Gopher wrote: »

If Irish men love Polish women as much as boards seem to show how come there are very few at these clubs?

I think the men on here giving it all that about foreign women are just trying to get a rise out of Irish women tbh. The attitude certainly isn’t reflected in the dozens of Irish men I know; every last one of them is involved with an Irish woman.

Tha Gopher

seahorse wrote: »

I think the men on here giving it all that about foreign women are just trying to get a rise out of Irish women tbh. The attitude certainly isn’t reflected in the dozens of Irish men I know; every last one of them is involved with an Irish woman.

The man speaks the truth. Most of the lads I know work in heavily foreign firms. We have seen both sides. Some of it aint pretty.


Rather than "all Polish girls are beautiful" chats we seem to have chats along the lines of "ever notice how quite a few good looking Polish girls go and get a bad haircut" type of thing. Or how alot of the college educated ones dress like it is 1982.

Wibbs

seahorse wrote: »

I think the men on here giving it all that about foreign women are just trying to get a rise out of Irish women tbh.

I tend to agree.

The attitude certainly isn’t reflected in the dozens of Irish men I know; every last one of them is involved with an Irish woman.

Well statistically you're bang on there anyway. I dunno every male mate of mine that has gone out with a foreign woman has tended to stay foreign in subsequent relationships for some reason. I would say I've gone out with more foreign women than Irish. Not by any plan on my part it's just ended up that way. They were as different from each other far more than their birthplace came into it. I did notice some differences between say the Latins and Irish TBH, some bad some good.

Trippie

Semele wrote: »

Oh and btw-

That is a ridiculous generalisation, as was the rest of your post. I reserve the right to go to any pub or club I want without having to be on the pull. Should a woman not go out in Coppers if she has a boyfriend because by being there she's implying that she's available and deceiving all the honest menfolk? Should she not wear revealing clothes unless she's single? Cop the f*ck on!

213 posts and finally we have a mention of coppers, iv found that the upstairs smoking area is one of the best places in any club to just talk to ppl. it seems people are much more approachable as they know what its like downstairs on the dance floor so ta sober conversation is a somewhat unique experience

norrie rugger

seahorse wrote: »

Of course you?ve every right to tell them to fukoff, given they can see you?re with your partner and are therefore insulting you, her, and your relationship. Telling the pair of them to fukoff in that situation would be fairly mandatory; I?d go one step further and tell them to buy a couple of vibrators if they?re that fukin desperate.

and I did end up being somewhat rude to them. But I would not be right to do so to the next lady

Publin

seahorse wrote: »

Could you quote where I say that it does please, since that's what you seem to be saying.

Could you show me where I said you have it as your automatic response? Anyway, this is what the thread is about. Girls having "fook off" as their immediate response. Me, nor anyone else, has questioned a girl's right to tell a persistent drunken idiot to "f**k off", only that is shouldn't happen when a guy approaches politely. I think that's clear to everyone else reading this thread, and I can't spell it out any more clearly.

However, just to entertain your request (although I never said you did this), in the quote below you have tried to justify why it happens. Instead of trying to justify it, maybe just admit that some girls are simply rude.

seahorse wrote: »

of course there is a difference in the example I cited and the one in the original post. The point I’m making though, is that if a woman has had enough of the type of experiences I’ve described that’ll inevitably raise the likelihood of men having the type of experience the OP has described.

Red Alert

There's a couple of polish women in work who pretty much knock the socks off any of the other talent in the place... and the attitude/talent ratio is generally much more positive in my opinion with them.

Semele

Semele wrote: »

Oh and btw-

That is a ridiculous generalisation, as was the rest of your post. I reserve the right to go to any pub or club I want without having to be on the pull. Should a woman not go out in Coppers if she has a boyfriend because by being there she's implying that she's available and deceiving all the honest menfolk? Should she not wear revealing clothes unless she's single? Cop the f*ck on!

Sure, why shouldnt non single people go out!
But hang on a second.......you go somewhere you KNOW people will be drinking and if you wear revealing clothes sober guys will look and drunk guys will leer.
Its what you should expect tbh. In fact to what purpose do you wear revealing clothes ? To attract attention? Then give out about it? Is this some mind game?

And why arent women up for a laugh, I enjoy meeting different people when I go out and buzzing. Whether I fancy someone or not I like to enjoy a night out! Abroad you can do that and women dont feel threatened. Foreign women here are easier for having a laugh with. LOTS of Irish women are great for having a laugh with but there is a sizeable minority that give ye a bad name. Who are repulsed by a fella saying hi or sitting down at a table near them or shocked at how dare you intrude upon them when in all reality they are in a public place that people go to socialise..........

flushje

I remeber i tried to give a rose to some bird and she actually threw a 1/4 pounder at my face from point blank range.

Id say it looked hilarious.

SV

flushje wrote: »

I remeber i tried to give a rose to some bird and she actually threw a 1/4 pounder at my face from point blank range.

Id say it looked hilarious.

Seen something similar like that happening.


Yer man went back at her, laughed and threw chewing gum in her hair. Got messy too.
Good enough for her, don't care what problem ya have, don't take it out on someone being nice to you.

ewj1978

look its simple... Nightclubs are for only one thing and thats More Drinking after being removed form your favourite pub at 1.30am... Women should be ignored in clubs as the beer goggle effect is vastly increased by flashing lights and large quantities of spirits..

thefinalstage

ewj1978 wrote: »

look its simple... Nightclubs are for only one thing and thats More Drinking after being removed form your favourite pub at 1.30am... Women should be ignored in clubs as the beer goggle effect is vastly increased by flashing lights and large quantities of spirits..

Anybody ever in Barcode? Every person is like 12 in there! By the gods, seeing some kid sit down at at half nine with a cigarette in one hand and what I can only assume was ribena in the other made me laugh really hard. I was watching people in their twenties/30's chat up and score these....girls. nasty place. I will not go to there again!

I never talk to girls in clubs at all. I simply cannot hear them!

St Bill

Publin wrote: »

Well you're reading a bit too much into the OPs post I think. I'm taking what he said at face value. He could well have just approached an Irish girl in a niteclub, in a polite manner, and was told to "f**k off". Obviously he didn't take to kindly to it, and probably was in the back of his mind of the rest of the night and made the night out less enjoyable.

The OP never said that he tried to approach other girls after that, but if he's going to bother chatting them up, he's hardly going over with a "bad attitude" towards them!

I'd also like to point out that the kind of guys who would take offence to this sort of treatment are likely to be the type of guys who are decent and polite and don't deserve to be spoken to in this manner. From the details given, the OP didn't try to be macho or even throw out an abusive comment even after he was told to f off for no reason. Whereas if some guy comes over all sleazy and doesn't take no for an answer, he knows he deserves it, and doesn't let the "fook off" response ruin his night (as he expects it) and off he goes to annoy more girls.

You didn't quote the last part of my response where I said no genuine man deserves to be spoken to in a rude manner. Hell, no-one should be spoken to in a rude manner...says more about yourself (general 'yourself') than the other person.

I'm just getting the gist from some posters to this thread (not from the OP though!) that they've had a hard time with some women and instead of shrugging it off, they decide to think that most Irish women are cruel, heartless wenches. There are many posts in this thread referring to Irish women as 'fugly bitches', 'greasy dish water' and 'moonpig' and all because the man in question couldn't see that he was dealing witha raving lunatic instead of a nice girl. Not everyone is going to act like you want them to act, and the quicker these guys realise this, their lives will be a hell of a lot easier.

Ooh, and I think Irish men are lovely, fecking foreigners coming over here and stealing OUR men : )

Kintarō Hattori

Tha Gopher wrote: »

As for Polish girls, I cant drag any of my mates to decent electro nights in the likes of Zanzibar because all the girls are E European. Cue attempts to strike up convo with women who largely either speak little English or cant comprehend the accent, and all for to find out she has a boyfriend anyway, like most of them. Therefore, nobody wants to go. If Irish men love Polish women as much as boards seem to show how come there are very few at these clubs? Id go for the decent music and lookers regardless of nationality but you would have a 1000 times better chance of pulling in a club full of Irish girls than one full of Poles.

Ahh here, why can't you just accept that eastern european ladies are here and we like them. Maybe you don't like them, maybe you were burned by one but you always seem to place them in a negative light in these threads. No-one is saying they are the be all and end all but there is a significant amount of them here involved with irishmen in relationships.

seahorse wrote: »

+ 1



I think the men on here giving it all that about foreign women are just trying to get a rise out of Irish women tbh. The attitude certainly isn’t reflected in the dozens of Irish men I know; every last one of them is involved with an Irish woman.

Why on earth do you say that? I'm not trying to get a rise from the irish ladies but the fact of the matter is that the foreign ladies are alot less difficult to talk too/get on with than the irish ladies. They certainly seem to have less hang-ups and are less bitchy.

Different folks/different strokes I guess. You have your opinion and I have mine.

Poccington

I've always preferred Irish women to be honest... I just don't find the Eastern Europeans to be that attractive.

As for impolite and stuck up women.... The only way to combat them, is to deliver a very harsh comeback.

Poccington

Poccington wrote: »

I've always preferred Irish women to be honest... I just don't find the Eastern Europeans to be that attractive.

I like women FULL STOP.

Publin

Kintarō Hattori wrote: »

I'm not trying to get a rise from the irish ladies

Viagra sorted out that problem? :pac: