Talk About Your Relationships Here

jellie

Rozabeez wrote: »

What annoys me about it? The fact that it's not a relationship and I'm in that 'Just before a relationship' stage where you're like, "Man, is this just a once, twice, third off thing?", "Why doesn't he bother texting?", "Is he bored ALREADY?"

****ing hell, I'm actually insecure over a guy because he's not giving me any attention unless we're out together... says a lot for my personality eh?

Sounds like things are only starting? If he cant make an effort at the beginning of a relationship its really not worth it.

Why do we let men f*ck with our heads so much..

Wibbs

sar84 wrote: »

Why do we let men f*ck with our heads so much..

I reckon for the same reason men let women f*ck with their heads. You let them, or don't have enough confidence in your own value to call a spade a spade and establish boundaries. that or a simple lack of communication or compatibility.

jellie

Wibbs wrote: »

I reckon for the same reason men let women f*ck with their heads. You let them, or don't have enough confidence in your own value to call a spade a spade and establish boundaries. that or a simple lack of communication or compatibility.

or for some reason you love the stupid fool

although the lack of communication is probably more likely. had a nice long chat with the bf last night about stuff & feeling so much better about everything. but when were both busy we dont have all that much time for communication

Wibbs

sar84 wrote: »

or for some reason you love the stupid fool

Which is a good thing, but it can't be used as an excuse for being one sided or a fantasy of how you think they should be either. We've all done that at some point.

although the lack of communication is probably more likely. had a nice long chat with the bf last night about stuff & feeling so much better about everything. but when were both busy we dont have all that much time for communication

There's always time I reckon though, if you want to make the time. Everyone can find 10 minutes in the day.

jellie

Wibbs wrote: »

Which is a good thing, but it can't be used as an excuse for being one sided or a fantasy of how you think they should be either. We've all done that at some point.

There's always time I reckon though, if you want to make the time. Everyone can find 10 minutes in the day.

i understand youre just picking up on what i am saying but i feel the need to point out we are making a point of making time to speak to each other. we're both crazily busy at the moment, he has lots of college work & exams coming up & work is mad for me, but weve agreed to talk every night before bed. things got bad because id been away for work and simply couldnt AFFORD to talk for more than 5mins on stupid roaming rates. were back to every night now though the 10mins keeps turning into an hour though!

i was just frustrated & having a rant - as per the thread title. things have calmed down a lot since my first rant (thank God!). i just miss him.

Wibbs

Well that's good!

jellie

yeah, sorry if i got a bit defensive there. feeling lots better now

Macha

My boyfriend spends all his spare time on sports. He's a triathlete & trains about 10 times a week. Average time getting home: 9pm. We rarely eat dinner together anymore.

I know I should be happy he's fit & healthy & not spending his time in the pub or in front of the TV...just wondering if anyone else has this problem?

marshmallow

/Rant
He's annoyed I didn't go over to his house on Sat night. Turned into little tiff on Sunday night & haven't talked since.

So mature, right?

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

/rant over

ali.c

taconnol wrote: »

My boyfriend spends all his spare time on sports. He's a triathlete & trains about 10 times a week. Average time getting home: 9pm. We rarely eat dinner together anymore.

I know I should be happy he's fit & healthy & not spending his time in the pub or in front of the TV...just wondering if anyone else has this problem?

Eh not as such mind you last year my bf was finishing a part time masters and his job is pretty demanding to begin with. Was pretty frustrating for me, the most annoying part though was that he wouldnt take any study leave. No holidays and little or no chill out time to do couply things. Anyhow its different but i can emphatise with your OH having something else taking up all of his free time! For me though we just had to learn to make time for each other whenever possible. Dunno if that helps or not but i feel for you!

SarahSassy

I am so annoyed with men.... Met a guy a couple of weeks ago... Had good fun, he asked for my number and texted me there and then so I had his. H knows my friend through her work but not very well. During the course of the night he told me he is more of a text person than a talker and then the day after we met he was texting ....

He stayed in touch for a few days and then asked me out by text... I agreed but had to change the plan so I texted him (as he was at his parents house) last weekend to rearrange for tomorrow. This was all agreed but no plan made and then he replies at 2 am that night with some strange text... Nothing sinister but defintiely a drunk text. I didnt know if it was for me so I didnt reply....

Anyway, have heard NOTHING since... I was in touch with him to arrange this so I have NO intention of contacting him to see if he still wants to meet. The way I see it, if he still wanted to meet he would be in touch..

Why do some people do this??? Its so mean and rude....

Pj!

SarahSassy wrote: »

I am so annoyed with men.... Met a guy a couple of weeks ago... Had good fun, he asked for my number and texted me there and then so I had his. H knows my friend through her work but not very well. During the course of the night he told me he is more of a text person than a talker and then the day after we met he was texting ....

He stayed in touch for a few days and then asked me out by text... I agreed but had to change the plan so I texted him (as he was at his parents house) last weekend to rearrange for tomorrow. This was all agreed but no plan made and then he replies at 2 am that night with some strange text... Nothing sinister but defintiely a drunk text. I didnt know if it was for me so I didnt reply....

Anyway, have heard NOTHING since... I was in touch with him to arrange this so I have NO intention of contacting him to see if he still wants to meet. The way I see it, if he still wanted to meet he would be in touch..

Why do some people do this??? Its so mean and rude....

Really thought for a while you were actually talking about me there!

In general men are afraid of commitment and have other stupid issues. Me included. But I say text him.

SarahSassy

Forky wrote: »

Really thought for a while you were actually talking about me there!

In general men are afraid of commitment and have other stupid issues. Me included. But I say text him.

Haha - are you from Louth????

I dont understand why he would ask me out, agree to a night and then bolt?????? Its so alien to me.

I wont contact him.. I have learned the hard way that if a guy has the nerve to ask you out, then does not follow through then he is unlikely to be interested enough... I made an effort and arranged a day with him but he didnt follow through...

At this point, I dont want to see someone who is only there cos I pushed them in a corner... He asked me out and he knows where I am.... I do think his chance has passed though...

Macha

Ah yeah! He won't take any holidays. He's about to start a new job and hasn't taken a break between. Plus he's cashed in his holidays from his old job. Grrrr.

Right now he's outside in the hall (lovingly) putting together his new triathlon bike. *Sigh* That bike has gotten more attention since it arrived than me. And there's a DVD on the sitting room table that arrived a week ago & we still haven't watched. Men!!

SarahSassy - it might be no harm texting him in the morning to confirm meeting. He may be sitting at home totally paralysed by mortification at the drunken text he sent you.

Wibbs

taconnol wrote: »

He may be sitting at home totally paralysed by mortification at the drunken text he sent you.

Then he's lacking the cahonays to be straight about it. Not a good sign in my gender.

Pj!

SarahSassy wrote: »

Haha - are you from Louth????

I dont understand why he would ask me out, agree to a night and then bolt?????? Its so alien to me.

I wont contact him.. I have learned the hard way that if a guy has the nerve to ask you out, then does not follow through then he is unlikely to be interested enough... I made an effort and arranged a day with him but he didnt follow through...

At this point, I dont want to see someone who is only there cos I pushed them in a corner... He asked me out and he knows where I am.... I do think his chance has passed though...

I was actually still thinking you may be talking about me, but no, i'm not from Louth.

Hope his drunken texts werent as stupid as mine. :rolleyes::o

SarahSassy

Forky wrote: »

I was actually still thinking you may be talking about me, but no, i'm not from Louth.

Hope his drunken texts werent as stupid as mine. :rolleyes::o

If you did this to some poor girl then you are very naughty

What did you do?? I am curious why someone would do that??? PM me if you wish... I am so curious...

Sugar Drunk

why do people have such double standards grrr.

my boyf is in a group who recently put on a show. one of the girls from the show invited us to one shes in and offered to let us stay. I might not be able to go and yet the boyf is thinking of going by himself.

like he thinks i'm going to be okay with him heading out and staying in some girl i barely know's house?! ffs if I wanted to stay in some lads house instead of comin home he would go mad!

am i just a jealous psycho or would anyone else have a problem with this??

P.s. sarah sassy if he text you when he was drunk he might wonder why you didnt reply. what people actually text when they are drunk can vary a lot from what they think they wrote! im guilty of that myself 'hey babe how ya doin' can come out as 'hy baeb hwyadoin' but in my drunk head looks perfectly legible

Cmol

Ahhh I dont know if it makes me a total psycho too but in your shoes I would not be happy!! Its not like their life-long friends or anything....

Although in saying that, presumably you've seen them together, do you think you have any reason to be jealous?!?! We ladies can usually pick up on these things pretty quick!!

Marbles

me and my boyf of 2 yrs went on a break last yr, we were in the same club one night, and he was with someone all night in front of me and all my friends a week later, grinding on the dancefloor,and dancing on the podiums so everyon could see. it was the worst night of my life ...it wasnt the fact that he was with someone, as we were on a break, but infront of me, so soon after the break, and all my friends there too..so i left the club, he ran after me, denyed it to the last aacted like a complete nutter and swore to all the gods and saints that i was IMAGINING IT!!??? making me out to be the nutter?? i got mad, slapped him across the face.. and then he preceeded to threaten to slit his wrists infront of me with a big knife whilst screaming and acting really really pyschotic!! horrifying ..

Pj!

Marbles wrote: »

me and my boyf of 2 yrs went on a break last yr, we were in the same club one night, and he was with someone all night in front of me and all my friends a week later, grinding on the dancefloor,and dancing on the podiums so everyon could see. it was the worst night of my life ...it wasnt the fact that he was with someone, as we were on a break, but infront of me, so soon after the break, and all my friends there too..so i left the club, he ran after me, denyed it to the last aacted like a complete nutter and swore to all the gods and saints that i was IMAGINING IT!!??? making me out to be the nutter?? i got mad, slapped him across the face.. and then he preceeded to threaten to slit his wrists infront of me with a big knife whilst screaming and acting really really pyschotic!! horrifying ..

Jesus! Sounds like a nice lad.

and your still with him Marbles?

Sugar Drunk

Sugar Drunk wrote:

like he thinks i'm going to be okay with him heading out and staying in some girl i barely know's house?! ffs if I wanted to stay in some lads house instead of comin home he would go mad!

Ehm...
tbh, these are two totally seperate issues, and one person going into an unjustified jealous rage doesn't mean the other should do the same...

why wouldn't you be ok with it? do you not trust him?

Wibbs

Moonbaby wrote: »

and your still with him Marbles?

I would be thinking the same. If she is and he hasn't changed radically and I mean not that she's convinced herself that he has, then on her head be it.

SarahSassy

Sugar Drunk wrote: »

P.s. sarah sassy if he text you when he was drunk he might wonder why you didnt reply. what people actually text when they are drunk can vary a lot from what they think they wrote! im guilty of that myself 'hey babe how ya doin' can come out as 'hy baeb hwyadoin' but in my drunk head looks perfectly legible

He was in touch the following morning and explained why he was not in touch and it was all perfectly plausible. Have re-arranged to meet so hope its a good night out...

Thanks all

Shine7

Just broke up with my girlfriend of 6 months and I'm afraid I've made a mistake but even more afraid that I'll change my mind and make a bigger mistake! Feelings didn't change and I'm still completely attracted to her and care about her but we were fighting a lot and compatibility was something I was questioning.

Now we've broken up and are trying to remain friends but she's leaning on me as a crutch to get her through the break up. I'm trying to be strong and put some distance between us so she can have a chance to get over it but it's not working and it feels like we're breaking up daily. I'm trying to be the strong one but she keeps breaking down my resolve.

I'm living in a city that I'm not from and only have a handful of people down here that I know and even fewer friends where as she is from here so has her family and all her friends. Part of me is afraid I'm not being strong enough to walk away from her completely because I'm losing my closest friend here. Another part is afraid I've let go of something that might have lasted a lot longer than I let it.

Sorry, needed to rant

Kelly O'Malley

Had this fella once who had the most awful temper.He came into the sitting room one day where I'd collapsed onto the sofa after a hard day at work prior to starting supper.He started to rant coz I hadn't hoovered the minute I'd come in.He yelled so vehemently his false teeth flew out of his mouth and hit the tv screen with a 'ping'.I folded up,I mean I was on the floor laughing.He scuttled over and palmed his teeth,slipping them back into his mouth and slunk out of the room.I stayed with him for 2 years and stayed friends with him after he dumped me.If he'd been half as nice to me when we were together as he was afterwards I'd have married him!:D

aliqueenb

grrrrrr why do guys text you, and then you text back and then they don't text back, its so retarded, like why did they text you in the first place, grrrrrrrr

Wibbs

That I don't get. text or not. Jeez not exactly a big decision really. Think of it as a gobshíte detector test. If they pull that should you invest any more emotional energy on them? That would be a no.

ilovetulips

Would I be right in thinking that its a bit strange that my supposed 'boyfriend' of 5 months hasnt introduced me to any of his friends other than the one I met him through. And if he doesnt make an effort to meet up on weekends when its the only time he's free. Im just feelin a bit insecure cos his ex is unbelievable looking as well and I know theyre still in contact.
Also, when he told me he was going somewhere in particular, I subesequently found out through my best friend that himself and his friend were going to a party that his ex was hosting. I rang him that night as I was out myself and he text me back apologising that he missed my call and that he couldnt meet me that night.
Am I just being paranoid or does that not sound strange?