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Truth about Porn

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Comments

  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    Andrew33 wrote: »
    Ya put animals ahead of children ya freak, you should be burned at the stake:D, porn is probably the second oldest industry on the planet, but I do think the whole porn industry is becoming a bit too mainstream and that just numbs people against ANY sex crime.

    Err, I think its advertising & the amount of media (including the news) that we receive on a daily basis that is numbing people to any sex crime. Lets be honest here, unless you go seeking to find Porn, you're not going to stumble upon it. Which means that people are not going to be exposed to it on a daily basis. In fact, the only people exposed to it are those actively seeking it.

    How often in the last week have you been exposed to porn just by switching through channels at home or scanning magazines in the shop?


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    This post has been deleted.

    So the difference is based entirely on the perception that this comes from Hollywood and the other comes from something else?

    And the fact is that Hollywood and other reputable studio's have released movies depicting the crimes of serial killers, rapists, etc which were based on fact.

    And TBH, most porn is based on fantasy just like the movies we see in the theaters. If anything the movies we see from Hollywood regarding the terrible acts are portrayed as being more factual and realistic than the porn movies themselves.

    There have been quite a number of "official" type movies which have shown rather dispicable acts in the past from rape, to child abuse right through to genocide. All of which were based on real life, stated as such, and the actors received awards for being so real-life... TBH, your explanation doesn't cut it.

    The only real difference is that one is categorised as porn, and the other as "thriller", or "real life story" or "Drama".


  • Registered Users Posts: 9,348 ✭✭✭nozzferrahhtoo


    But I guess if rape has to do with sex and porn industry has to do with sex also, then there is a bit of a link, though. Do you find the correlation acceptable, now, nozferatu'?

    Not in the slightest no.

    Escaping a crime scene involves running. So does marathon training. Do you think if I found a handful of anecdotes about people who ran away from crime scene and then went into marathon running that I somehow have found some correlation containing any explanatory power what so ever?

    Not in the slightest.

    There are many good and bad things in our lives that share common elements. This does not mean that those common elements are automatically a casual link between them. Good food feels good to us to eat. Obesity also involves food. Do you honestly think that obesity occurs because people love the taste of food so much? Do you think anorexia occurs only in people who do not like food?

    Not in the slightest I imagine.

    AngreyBadgers example of procreation and rape is also very good, better than either of mine. Just because the two things involve sex does not in any way mean you have an automatic correlation, let alone a causal one.

    However can we find some anecdotes about someone who was abused sexually and then went on to work in porn? Of course we can. It would be a shock if you can not. The danger however is in extrapolating anecdotes that confirm your own biases into generalised statements about the industry as a whole.


  • Registered Users Posts: 9,348 ✭✭✭nozzferrahhtoo


    This post has been deleted.

    And which do you think is worse to portray, if you forget for one moment that one is real and one is acted?

    On one hand you have the portrayal of a sexual act that some people enjoy very much, many people consent to, and in fact harms no one and is one of the many aspects of the pleasures of human sexuality…

    On the other hand you have the portrayal of horrific violence being perpetrated against unwilling, non-consenting victims in wanton, gory ways.

    The difference here is a lot deeper than merely waving ones hands and saying “Ah well the second one is not real, only acted, the other one is really happening”. Both of these things happen for real in our real world. In a straight comparison I think there is a world of difference between watching a bloody violent non consensual act, against watching a pleasurable consensual one.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 25,848 ✭✭✭✭Zombrex


    so my friend is an idiot because her first time sleeping with a new guy he started choking her?

    No, the new guy (who I assumed was your friend) is an idiot for thinking "Oh I saw this in a gonzo porn movie I'm sure the girl I hardly know and have never slept with before will like it because after all all girls are exactly the same"

    Blaming porn for this is a bit like playing the A-Team because your friend drove his car off a bridge while trying to jump it.


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  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    Wicknight wrote: »
    No, the new guy (who I assumed was your friend) is an idiot for thinking "Oh I saw this in a gonzo porn movie I'm sure the girl I hardly know and have never slept with before will like it because after all all girls are exactly the same"

    Blaming porn for this is a bit like playing the A-Team because your friend drove his car off a bridge while trying to jump it.

    You're all assuming he learned this from porn... he could just have easily picked this up from a previous lover, and assumed it was the norm for most relationships...


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 19,777 ✭✭✭✭The Corinthian


    Wicknight wrote: »
    No, the new guy (who I assumed was your friend) is an idiot for thinking "Oh I saw this in a gonzo porn movie I'm sure the girl I hardly know and have never slept with before will like it because after all all girls are exactly the same"
    I don't think it is unfair to suggest that while art imitates life, life will often do the same. It is quite likely that many current trends in sexual grooming and practice have been influenced by porn, just as porn draws from market demand. For example, shaved or waxed pubic reasons were rare in Ireland up until ten years ago - for men they were unheard of - yet these are more common nowadays.

    Of course, that any guy will assume that a woman will do something because it is in a porn movie is a bit ridiculous - just as it is ridiculous that a woman will assume that a guy should be able to shag her standing up supporting her solely with his John Thomas, for the same reasons. But then again, idiocy pretty much predates pornography.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 39,022 ✭✭✭✭Permabear


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  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    This post has been deleted.

    Take a porn film showing a rape, and a Hollywood movie showing a rape. The first uses rather cheesy lines, hunky actors, and big boobed women with tattoos which just reinforces the lack of realism.... whereas the Hollywood movie throws millions of dollars, the top actors, research departments, etc to make the experience as realistic as possible.

    Personally, I believe the majority of porn films look like porn, and rarely enters the real world. Hollywood movies on the other hand regularly seek as much realism as possible. If we're talking influence over people, the studios with the money behind them, are going to come up trumps.
    That the actors received awards for the verisimilitude or plausibility of their performances only highlights the point that I'm making. What porn actress has ever received an award for doing a really authentic imitation of being gangbanged?

    Dunno. I'm sure they have their own award schemes... considering they're not going to get recognition from the mainstream award schemes from Hollywood or such.
    No, the real difference is in the kinds of "acting" that is required to produce the film in the first place.

    Why? As I have said above, the high budget movies of Hollywood have more money & technology to make the experience more "real".. I've never seen a Porn film that didn't fail to appear to be "a porn".

    Unless you're including the amateur movies which are posted on the internet, that are made with a home camera, and are realistic simply on their basic technology/camera handling?

    Because I think we need to decide here.. whether we're talking about Porn as in the studios publishing stuff, and the material which comes from the ether of the internet.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 39,022 ✭✭✭✭Permabear


    This post has been deleted.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,251 ✭✭✭AngryBadger


    This post has been deleted.

    I'm still not seeing your point here, if a woman consents to being in a movie of this type then it's her decision to have these things done to her. If you're point is that seeing these acts in pornography numbs us, I have to point out that's adults watching porn KNOW that it's a bunch of people being paid to "perform" on screen, so I don't think it's reasonable to say they're going to be "numbed" by something they know is almost completely divorced from reality.

    In contrast the kind of person who watches porn and then "assumes" this is normal, has to be more than a little unbalanced already. In which case it's a "chicken vs. egg" situation, and you can hardly blame pornography for their actions, that kind of person is just as likely to take their cues from reports of real-life events, the hollywood movies you've described, or trumped-up stories told by bragging friends.
    This post has been deleted.

    There are "adult entertainment" awards every year. Are you saying getting an award somehow makes things more legitimate?
    This post has been deleted.

    Again the only point I see you making here is that you feel porn should be done away with to protect the "poor wimmins"? Obviously it's sad when anyone has a negative experience of any kind whether it's an actual sexual assault, or consenting to be in a pornographic film and finding the experience harrowing, surely the issue here is that people have a duty of care to themselves and unfortunately a great many people don't discharge this responsibility properly?

    I mean if someone walked into a cage at the zoo and started poking a sleeping lion on a dare, would you feel sympathy for them after hearing their arm had been bitten off, or would you think they were very foolish to poke a sleeping lion?


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    This post has been deleted.

    No I'm arguing that the productions from big budget places like Hollywood are more capable of producing movies which have the appearance of being real compared with the porn productions.

    But I'm also seeking not to place all porn in the same category.. There's a huge difference between the amateur porn on the net, the production movies available for purchase off Amazon, the stuff you buy in seedy shops in Amsterdam, and the underground movies of S&m or such.
    Regardless, when a mainstream Hollywood movie contains a sex scene, the actors are not actually having intercourse; they are simulating it. While some elements of porn films may be simulated—the ridiculous scenarios, the fake moans, and the like—when it comes down to the sexual act itself, there is no simulation. Neither is there simulation when it comes to "portrayals" of men spitting on women, urinating on them, ejaculating on them, penetrating them with baseball bats, or performing oral sex on them so roughly that they gag or vomit. To call this "acting" is something of a misnomer.

    Really? So movies from directors like Stanly Kubrick which have rather "different" ideas than the mainstream Hollywood, and yet receive the full backing of it, don't seek to portray an certain element of realism?

    You seem to hold the mainstream movies as something higher.. however Hollywood has its own share of sexual movies which aren't classified "porn" but "art". They seek to get as close to realism as possible, and lets face it, in many cases they do. There are many such movies from many different directors hosting many different levels of sexual themes. Kubrick is probably the best known of the lot, but they're there nonetheless.

    And the influence is there nonetheless. Despite your stance that none of it is real in a mainstream movie, versus a porn, the impression is there. If someone is likely to believe that an act in a porn should be repeated, then its just as likely that they'll believe some act in a mainstream production house should be repeated also.


  • Registered Users Posts: 9,348 ✭✭✭nozzferrahhtoo


    This post has been deleted.

    Is this what they signed up for though? Some people are willing you know. Some people even enjoy pain, though I am as far from understanding that as it is possible to get while recognizing it exists.

    If they are in actual distress then this can only be because they are performing their job under duress, in conditions that they did not sign up for, or are being forced to perform the acts against their will. These are not problems of porn. These are problems of legality.

    There are many industries where people are cajoled or even forced into performing actions that they simply did not sign up for. This is not a problem of those industries, but a problem of the employer in question breaking the law.

    What you say here can just as easily be said of some people working in McDonalds, as secretaries, in politics, or just about any industry you can name. Women, for example, who have signed up to be secretaries answering phones and doing data entry can suddenly find their boss telling them that they will lose their job if they do not now proceed to make everyone a coffee and then go clean the company toilets.

    If you take a job and you are cajoled, forced, or pressured into performing tasks or actions that are NOT in the job description you signed up for then this is a work place legality issue.

    Alas when it comes to pornography, our attitudes to it socially and in some countries legally have pushed it underground to the point that when such work place ethics are broken the sex workers in question do not have the same legal workplace recourses that you and I likely take for granted. The secretary who loses her job for not cleaning the toilets has grounds to take a case of “unfair dismissal”. Have you heard of a girl in porn having this option because when she got on the set she was told she had to engage in a form of penetration she did not sign up for?
    However the problem here having said all that is that „porn“ is a catch all term for anything sexual that is in some way recorded fort he viewing of others. Clearly however the entire industry is a very wide spectrum of actual products.

    This is a fact that pushes discussions such as this around in a never ending circle. Usually when a product category has so many sub products and product types… and some of those sub products are problematic or unethical…. We focus our discussion on THOSE sub-products and not the category as a whole. When, for example, alcopops we getting people too drunk, too fast, too young, people rose up against alcopops. Very few rose up against alcohol as a whole.

    Alas that does not happen with porn and when people find some extreme porn of one type or another, this is held up as a banner against porn itself, and the resulting impression people have of porn causes us to push it further underground, make it more taboo, and hence create the working environment for the sex workers that actually fosters and perpetuates the type of events that we are using to indict the industry in the first place.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 25,848 ✭✭✭✭Zombrex


    You're all assuming he learned this from porn... he could just have easily picked this up from a previous lover, and assumed it was the norm for most relationships...

    True. As TC points out acts in porn simply reflect what people do during sex anyway. Porn didn't invent a whole lot of new stuff that no one had ever done before.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 63 ✭✭Bella_purple


    I tried to look at why a woman would choose such a career. If coming from a poor environment and in this way making the money, I understand, has limited possibilities.
    Then, the correlation between sex and sex industry (be it pornography or prostitution) is not any correlation. Otherwise, I agree with the example of athletes who run and the criminal who flees the scene.
    I do not think I want to make connections where they don't exist. Rather try to find out what would be in the minds of ordinary women who would choose such a career. I can understand everyone's fantasies that can carry out and fulfill by opting for this career.
    But from a psychological perspective (not that I would be in the right position, for I'm not a psychologist), especially for a normal woman, sex is not random. We are genetically programmed to seek stability. In our brain, sex is linked with love. That's why I said that I find it hard to believe that a woman would get into such a career without some hidden psychological motivations.

    On the other hand, is a pretty good book that explains the mechanism of a woman raped. The result is that it will be more active sexually slipping towards promiscuity.

    Understand that I am not against pornography. Not even close. I was trying to figure out what made those women enter the industry. Of course some come because they want more sex (biological, that translates into more testosterone they have).


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,251 ✭✭✭AngryBadger


    But from a psychological perspective (not that I would be in the right position, for I'm not a psychologist), especially for a normal woman, sex is not random. We are genetically programmed to seek stability. In our brain, sex is linked with love. That's why I said that I find it hard to believe that a woman would get into such a career without some hidden psychological motivations.

    What you say about sex/love/stability is valid, however you're forgetting that humans (stupidly) throw "culture" into the mix. A huge part of culture in general is the power associated with creation, and by extension women, (since they are the bearers of children). Now that's all fine and dandy, but unfortunately for many women nowadays they confuse this idea with the notion of using sex as a means of control. i.e. Men want to have sex with me, and I can use that desire to get what I want.

    I'm not saying this explains why women get into pornography, but there are examples where this is exactly what happens, sadly this approach does not involve any real understanding of being a part of the porn industry can entail.

    Similarly there are instances of women who get into prostitution because using the same reasoning, "Men want to have sex with me, and I can charge them for that privilege/service", again on paper this seems fine, but does not reflect any real understanding of the industry they're getting involved in.

    For the record I'm not comparing prostitution and pornography directly, I'm simply offering a possible explanation of the logic driving at least some women to get involved in either since these are both part of the "sex industry" share many criticisms.

    On the other hand, is a pretty good book that explains the mechanism of a woman raped. The result is that it will be more active sexually slipping towards promiscuity.

    See this logic would only apply if it was shown that every woman who got involved in porn had been raped at some point in their lives, (maybe they have I don't know but I'm opposed to this being presented as an "accepted fact").


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,872 ✭✭✭strobe


    But from a psychological perspective (not that I would be in the right position, for I'm not a psychologist), especially for a normal woman, sex is not random. We are genetically programmed to seek stability. In our brain, sex is linked with love. That's why I said that I find it hard to believe that a woman would get into such a career without some hidden psychological motivations.

    In general...........

    I know a couple of girls that believe in the "free love" concept of the hippy era. They enjoy sex and sleep with many different people, most have no interest whatsoever in being in a stable relationship unless it is a open relationship sexually. Are they outside the norm for females? Yes certainly. But so are a lot of people for a lot of different reasons outside the norm.

    From a psychological (if that is the right word) persepective, for a normal man, sex is "random" in that they want to sleep with as many women as possible. But I know men that outside of a relationship have absolutely no interest in sex. They wouldn't consider having a one night stand for a second. If it isn't with a girlfriend they love they have no real interest as far as I can tell.

    Not all women have the same view of sex anymore than all men have the same view of sex. Some women want nothing more than to have sex with no strings attached and some men only ever want to have sex if it is in a loving relationship. This is outside of what you would expect in general but it is pretty common all the same.


  • Registered Users Posts: 9,348 ✭✭✭nozzferrahhtoo


    I tried to look at why a woman would choose such a career.

    In this you failed, no matter that you tried. You openly said that you chose one particular explanation, out of the infinite number available, and then sought out anecdotes to confirm that assumption. This is not trying to "look at why a woman would choose such a career"... this is trying to "confirm the reason I think a woman would choose such a career".

    As I said in post #127 this is not a good way to do research at all. In fact it is a mockery of research and your methodology needs a massive overhaul. As I said in that post "Essentially what you have done here is come up with a hypothesis which, you admit yourself, was based on NO data at all, and then you engaged in “confirmation bias” by searching for anecdotes which confirmed your idea."

    There is even a flaw in your basic research topic. It seems to suggest you may be of a mind to think that there is one reason why a woman would choose such a career. I challenge you to show me many careers that have ONE reason for choosing them. Every career has people in it that had a diversity of motivations for joining it. Some love the work, some hate the work but find it noble, some just are in it for the money... whatever career you find you will find near infinite motivations behind the workers being there. Some even have no motivations, life just egged them in that direction.

    That is "in the minds of ordinary women who would choose such a career" as you put it is likely to be different for each and every woman that is in it.
    But from a psychological perspective (not that I would be in the right position, for I'm not a psychologist), especially for a normal woman, sex is not random. We are genetically programmed to seek stability. In our brain, sex is linked with love.

    Alas it would seem you are not only not a psychologist but not a neuroscientist or evolutionary biologist either. These are very sweeping statements you just made and I struggle to find more than a mere modicum of accuracy in them.


  • Registered Users Posts: 9,348 ✭✭✭nozzferrahhtoo


    See this logic would only apply if it was shown that every woman who got involved in porn had been raped at some point in their lives

    Or, it could be added, that every woman raped showed some tendencies towards porn, but this is far from the truth. There are strong tendencies in rape victims AWAY from sex too in many cases.


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    strobe wrote: »
    In general...........

    I know a couple of girls that believe in the "free love" concept of the hippy era. They enjoy sex and sleep with many different people, most have no interest whatsoever in being in a stable relationship unless it is a open relationship sexually. Are they outside the norm for females? Yes certainly. But so are a lot of people for a lot of different reasons outside the norm.

    And what is the norm for females? Are we talking about what the norm was 10 years ago, 5 years ago, etc?

    And more importantly what age are these females? From my experience younger women have less respect for sex and what it entails, than women in their late 20's, whereas women in their 30's have developed their own individual ways of dealing with it.

    My point is that its rather difficult to talk about the norm, especially when we factor in Age. I can talk about my personal experiences, but thats no guarantee or respectable measurement of the whole. In fact, I doubt there is any respectable measurement possible.

    There are just assumptions.
    From a psychological (if that is the right word) persepective, for a normal man, sex is "random" in that they want to sleep with as many women as possible. But I know men that outside of a relationship have absolutely no interest in sex. They wouldn't consider having a one night stand for a second. If it isn't with a girlfriend they love they have no real interest as far as I can tell.

    This is typical stereotyping. Most of my friends do not do one-night-stands. Tried them once or twice, and moved on. Casual sex is rubbish, and most acknowledge it.

    However your statement is a reinforcement of past attitudes. The reputation that men are horny beasts and sex has little real meaning beyond the act. :rolleyes: If anything it is this attitude and the propaganda that goes with this attitude that encourages younger men to sleep around.
    Not all women have the same view of sex anymore than all men have the same view of sex. Some women want nothing more than to have sex with no strings attached and some men only ever want to have sex if it is in a loving relationship. This is outside of what you would expect in general but it is pretty common all the same.

    And that paragraph means what? That your previous points were meaningless? Its a justification. ;)


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,872 ✭✭✭strobe


    Are you disagreeing with me Klaz? I think you missed my whole point. You seem to think I was agreeing with Bella? I wasn't. My post was in relation to Bella's view that in general for women sex is more tied in with emotional intimacy than it is with men. She is probably right. It's probaby true that women are preprogrammed to seek out a single partner and men are preprogrammed to spread their seed far and wide. You can disagree with that but it's pretty much the generally excepted biological viewpoint. It's just how are species reproductive system is set up. But just because that is what is common doesn't mean it is definitive. My whole point was that for some men sex is completely about intimacy and has huge emotional meaning every time, and for some women sex is just a feel good activity that doesn't have to have any particular deep emotional resonance. Then for some men it can be one thing one time and another another time. The same for women.

    As for your "casual sex is rubbish" comment. Well I will have to respectfully but forcefully disagree. :cool: Maybe you're doing it wrong man?


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    strobe wrote: »
    Are you disagreeing with me Klaz? I think you missed my whole point. You seem to think I was agreeing with Bella? I wasn't. My post was in relation to Bella's view that in general for women sex is more tied in with emotional intimacy than it is with men. She is probably right. It's probaby true that women are preprogrammed to seek out a single partner and men are preprogrammed to spread their seed far and wide. You can disagree with that but it's pretty much the generally excepted biological viewpoint.

    The point being that many of the "generally" accepted beliefs about sexuality and predispositions towards sexual activity are based upon assumptions made 30 or 40 years ago. Our society, and that of societies in other countries have changed drastically over the last few decades, and the drivers that influence people have also changed.

    Its a stereotype from the past that hasn't been reviewed and updated to fit changed times.
    It's just how are species reproductive system is set up. But just because that is what is common doesn't mean it is definitive. My whole point was that for some men sex is completely about intimacy and has huge emotional meaning every time, and for some women sex is just a feel good activity that doesn't have to have any particular deep emotional resonance. Then for some men it can be one thing one time and another another time. The same for women.

    And I can agree with that. Its about the individual.
    As for your "casual sex is rubbish" comment. Well I will have to respectfully but forcefully disagree. :cool: Maybe you're doing it wrong man?

    I'm 33 years old, been single most of my life, and during my 20's had plenty of casual sex in multiple countries. It can be good, but mostly its not that great. Ultimately the woman you can have repeat encounters with and form a relationship/attachment that generates the best sex.

    My comment is based on my experience as a sexually active male. You have your own experience. Grand. No problems there. But the assumption that all men find casual sex to be fulfilling or enjoyable is bogus. Its similar to the assumption that all men watch porn. Or that all women watch coronation street.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,872 ✭✭✭strobe


    My comment is based on my experience as a sexually active male. You have your own experience. Grand. No problems there. But the assumption that all men find casual sex to be fulfilling or enjoyable is bogus. Its similar to the assumption that all men watch porn. Or that all women watch coronation street.

    I agree....... That is not my assumption. Again I'm not really sure what you are disagreeing with that I said. Or if you are even referencing anything I said. You appear to be reading all my posts in a meaning opposite to the one I intend. I presume it's not deliberate on your part.


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    Okie Dokie.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 63 ✭✭Bella_purple


    Interesting, AngryBadger your point of view resambles with a democratic economy: me (a female) give sex for men for my benefit (power or money) :) ... I guess it's a realistic approach, based on giving-receiving/ supply and demand let's call it game.

    ok nozzferrahhtoo, I'm wrong (I already explined how I did my little research. I'm not a psychologist/ bilogist/ neuroscientist). Then how do you see this matter of porn/ prostitution?


  • Registered Users Posts: 9,348 ✭✭✭nozzferrahhtoo


    ok nozzferrahhtoo, I'm wrong (I already explined how I did my little research. I'm not a psychologist/ bilogist/ neuroscientist). Then how do you see this matter of porn/ prostitution?

    No do not say that either!!! The issue is not with whether you are right or wrong, but with how you did your research.

    You could very well be right. I can not say!!! Do not give up on this so easily.

    Something you should NEVER do is think that if people say "Your reason for thinking X is a load of ****e" that they are saying "You are wrong about X".

    Our history is PEPPERED with people who have been spot on the money, but people crapped on them because their arguments were useless.

    How do I see the matter? I see it like I see everything else. "innocent until proven guilty".

    What we have is an industry, and until that industry can be shown to be damaging in some way then I would never move to speak against it.

    Not that speaking against it is EVER enough. We are inundated with research showing the damage caused by the cigarette industry. We KNOW it is damaging, we KNOW it does no good yet we allow it to continue.

    So speaking against it is not the only thing you can do, but at least when you speak against ciggs, you know you are on strong ground. It is NOT an innocent industry and it HAS been proven guilty.

    You have not even got that far with porn though, which is why I take issue. There are so many things to rise up against that you have good reason to rise up against....

    ... yet porn.... I have seen no good arguments against it.... and what arguments I have seen always seem to be ones that... if you pause to think about it... can be leveled at a hell of a lot, if not most, of our other industries....

    And if there is one thing i hate... is an argument that can be taken against a lot of things, but people use against only one while ignoring the rest. Pet peev for me.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 63 ✭✭Bella_purple


    See, nosferatu', I didn't try to think about porn from a ethical, moral perspective. My research, or less exigent term because it wasn't a scientific research, my analyse began with the motivations of women who chooses it. I don't have anything against porn or the ones that do porn.


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    See, nosferatu', I didn't try to think about porn from a ethical, moral perspective. My research, or less exigent term because it wasn't a scientific research, my analyse began with the motivations of women who chooses it. I don't have anything against porn or the ones that do porn.

    To be perfectly honest, this seems less about their actual possible motivations, and more about passing your own judgment. Which is fine, since this is a bulletin board. Still, don't dress it up as something else.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,847 ✭✭✭HavingCrack


    The article the Op linked to criticised the new acts of porn but surely these acts must always have existed??. But porn isn't a new issue-have you seen some of the pictures of the walls of Pompeii brothels, dirty feckers :p


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  • Registered Users Posts: 9,348 ✭✭✭nozzferrahhtoo


    See, nosferatu', I didn't try to think about porn from a ethical, moral perspective. My research, or less exigent term because it wasn't a scientific research, my analyse began with the motivations of women who chooses it. I don't have anything against porn or the ones that do porn.

    Yet another correction (and not on the spelling of my user name which I have resisted correcting on numerous occasions now)… you did not “analyse” the “motivations of women who choose” it. You systematically attempted to confirm the presumption of ONE SINGLE possible motivation for choosing it.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 63 ✭✭Bella_purple


    Yes, it is true, nozzferrahhtoo (I written your nick-name exactly the way it is pronounced). However, the fact of looking from one perspective does not invalidate the correctness of that view. It just doesn't say anything about other possible angles. Those unexplored sides can be valid. I mentioned them, you have shown them too: that they chose porn or entering in the sex industry just with a greater desire of having sex, of poverty etc.




    If you look at something you don't necessarly do it with the role of issuing judgments. Analysis allows a neutral location outside the problem, klaz.


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    If you look at something you don't necessarly do it with the role of issuing judgments. Analysis allows a neutral location outside the problem, klaz.

    I know what an analysis of a situation or subject is. I'm wondering though if you do, because your usage of the word isn't applicable to what you were doing. You were offering your opinion on a subject. As I said thats fine in itself. However, you seem to want to make it sound like it was based on measurable or quantifiable material, which it wasn't.

    My objection is the manner in which you're projecting your opinions. You're playing with words. And frankly, IMHO your stance is not neutral.


  • Registered Users Posts: 9,348 ✭✭✭nozzferrahhtoo


    Yes, it is true, nozzferrahhtoo (I written your nick-name exactly the way it is pronounced)

    Really? I hope you do not meet a Siobhans in your life. I tend to find it more polite to spell peoples names, online and offline, correctly. Not phonetically. Mainly because… you know… one is their name and the other is not.
    . However, the fact of looking from one perspective does not invalidate the correctness of that view

    Never said it does. Not once. It however does invalidate your methodology and makes your view useless for presentation as a result, even if it is 100% correct.

    Remember, you can be 100% right about something, but if your methodology is entirely useless (and it is) your conclusions are unpresentable. Just because your bad methodology does not "invalidate the correctness of the view" as you put it, does NOT mean your view is still not, currently, entirely devoid of credibility (and it is).

    Put it another way. I could say you are green. I could then say "I know this because I looked at an apple and IT was green". Having pointed out the complete ridiculousness of my methods, would I then lend ANY CREDIBILITY WHATSOEVER to my claim that you are green by saying "Ah well, but just because my methodology was bad... it does not mean you are NOT green.... It just doesn't say anything about other possible angles"

    No. The problem is it does not say anything about other angles. NOR HAVE YOU.

    If however you want to start, we are here for you. IF "those unexplored sides can be valid" then explore them, rather than wasting your time presenting self-confirming bias.

    Until then if the only support for your position is "my bad support doesnt negate the position" you have a long... long long..... looooooong way to go yet.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 63 ✭✭Bella_purple


    klaz, let's put things straight: my only problem regarding porn was if a considerable amount of the women who entered this industry were raped or something related. And if things were staying in this way, even if they were raped, if it gives any insight at all for the matter. But apart from this, apart for my interest in porn linked with the assumption of those women being raped, I didn't draw any conclusion about weather it was right or wrong if women enter in this industry. I wasn't emphasising any moral views. Not interested in that. So why do you say I judge? If I am to error, my only error can be a false hypothesis: that women who enter this industry had problemes regarding sex and that led them to practicing sex by choosing a porn career. When I think of the word "judgde" I relate it to opinions of the rightness or wrongness of the issue. Not my case.

    So, back to the problem, nozzferrahhtoo I'm sorry if I wasn't polite... in my own language we write as we pronounce. That's not an excuse, I just wanted to tell you that my intention wasn't rude. The result, yes, for which I apologise. What's a "Siobhans"?
    I think we are spinning around not coming up with any conclusion, just for the sake of the spinning... So for everything to be clear: I tryed to see if there is any connection with a rape, a molested child and a woman who later in her life chooses to follow a sex industry path of career. Yet, if there is a link, does it gives any insight of porn industry? Or should I take only what's seen on the surface: a bunch of people who deliberatly choose to have sex, no strings attached, no nothing. I told you: it can be that case too. You, other than criticising my bised opinion, my lack of information regarding the industry, my anecdots etc., what exactly have you really tryed to understand from this industry, nozzferrahhtoo? What is your perspective upon things? It's easy to demilosh something, I wanna see you building a hypothesis. I understand that you don't want me or another person to jump to the conclusions or assume things which don't stand at a propper observation. So I do understand that your criticism was constructive. Ok, I may be biased, but how do you see the matter?


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    klaz, let's put things straight: my only problem regarding porn was if a considerable amount of the women who entered this industry were raped or something related.

    And the point being that while some women may indeed have suffered rape in the past, there is no evidence to support the supposition that this a common occurrence. Considering the high profile that porn receives from monitoring agencies, religious groups, morality groups, etc such a trend would be promoted to the extreme and yet it doesn't. While there are cases of it happening to some individuals, its not widespread.

    Secondly, there is nothing to suggest that rape victims have shown a greater desire to enter the porn industry than non-rape victims. Nowhere in this thread does it show any evidence to support such a belief. Unless you're going to provide such reputable evidence?
    And if things were staying in this way, even if they were raped, if it gives any insight at all for the matter.

    Your whole stance above was if the women were raped. There is nothing else. So why put in " even if they were raped "? :confused:
    But apart from this, apart for my interest in porn linked with the assumption of those women being raped, I didn't draw any conclusion about weather it was right or wrong if women enter in this industry.

    Your assumption, first off. Secondly, both the tone you write in, and the area(s) you have focused on, show a definite bias on the subject.
    I wasn't emphasising any moral views. Not interested in that. So why do you say I judge? If I am to error, my only error can be a false hypothesis: that women who enter this industry had problemes regarding sex and that led them to practicing sex by choosing a porn career. When I think of the word "judgde" I relate it to opinions of the rightness or wrongness of the issue. Not my case.

    Think back. I objected to your Analysis... not your hypothesis. An analysis tends to rely on facts, statistics, and measurable references to function. A hypothesis can be based entirely on whats going on in your head.

    When i think of the word Judge (not "judgde") I think of passing judgment on a subject. Generally people posting or arguing will create a pyramid or a stack of "evidence" (i.e. posts with opinions, links, research, etc) under them to support their belief. That is what you attempted to do, and yet.... remain "neutral".

    How can you remain neutral on the subject when you only talk about rape, sex abuse or other such negative influences?


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  • Registered Users Posts: 9,348 ✭✭✭nozzferrahhtoo


    I think we are spinning around not coming up with any conclusion

    False. We came up with a conclusion. The conclusion was that you did no research, nor did you consider a multitude of possibilities. You decided on one possibility and then engaged in an attempt to support it by selective use of anecdote.

    Sounds like a good conclusion to me, and it appears to be sound based on your posts so far.
    what exactly have you really tryed to understand from this industry, nozzferrahhtoo? What is your perspective upon things?

    Read the posts I have made on this thread, my perspective and my conclusions, and what they are based on are clear. If you want to ask me ABOUT anything I have written in this thread then go ahead. But do not ask me to repeat myself just because you are too lazy to scroll back and read it.

    However a quick summary to help you find it when you do scroll back: I believe in innocent until proven guilty. And given that no guilt or harm is being established from porn in and of itself, I see no reason to indict it or speak against it.

    What I find instead is that speaking against it, forcing it underground and making it taboo, is a larger cause of harm in porn than the porn itself. It pushes the sex workers beyond the benefits that everyone else has in their day job that they take for granted. Medical insurance. Work place safety laws. Contractual obligations on the part of the employer and employee.

    We all spend our days taking these things for granted in our own job, and create an environment where this is absent in porn. Then when employers take advantage of the women in this industry because of this, we indict porn itself with these crimes of the employer, ignoring all the while that it is societies treatment of porn that nurtures the environment that those advantages are taken in.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 63 ✭✭Bella_purple


    Your whole stance above was if the women were raped. There is nothing else. So why put in " even if they were raped "? :confused:

    Even if they were raped this doesn't mean it can give relevant insight on the porn industry as a whole. Here I agree with nozzferrahhtoo. I mean I'm not sure if it would...


    How can you remain neutral on the subject when you only talk about rape, sex abuse or other such negative influences?

    Simple, I don't think if it's right nor wrong to enter in this industry. My attempt was to know more about the procentage of women who enter. And if a woman who is raped or molested as a child or has other sexual problemes is more drawn to this activity.
    I think I said that several times. I don't have any scientific evidence, just some anecdotes, as you call them, nozzferrahhtoo. I openely admited myself from the very beginning how I conducted this investigation or whatever you wanna call it.




    So basicly, I see women who enter in this industry divided in 3 categories:
    1. the ones that have been raped
    2. the ones with more testosterone -this hormone is responsable for a greater desire to have sex
    3. they come for poor enviornments.

    I was interested in point 1. The problem is that in other industries are also women who were raped. So the question is: does this rape-elemnt is concludent for the porn industry? This is what I'd like to find out.


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    Even if they were raped this doesn't mean it can give relevant insight on the porn industry as a whole. Here I agree with nozzferrahhtoo. I mean I'm not sure if it would...

    Never mind. You're missing the point completely.
    Simple, I don't think if it's right nor wrong to enter in this industry. My attempt was to know more about the procentage of women who enter. And if a woman who is raped or molested as a child or has other sexual problemes is more drawn to this activity.

    Then perhaps frame these as questions rather than suggesting that they're the norm?
    I think I said that several times. I don't have any scientific evidence, just some anecdotes, as you call them, nozzferrahhtoo. I openely admited myself from the very beginning how I conducted this investigation or whatever you wanna call it.

    Then why use words like investigation or analysis? You didn't investigate anything. You didn't gather data on the subject. You made an assumption and went with it. You make it sound as if your pretext comment allows you free reign in your comments...

    Like. God is wonderful, and I haven't done any research on the subject, but my analysis suggests that God is really a strawberry. - I suppose you could be right. God could be a strawberry based on your pretext.
    So basicly, I see women who enter in this industry divided in 3 categories:
    1. the ones that have been raped
    2. the ones with more testosterone -this hormone is responsable for a greater desire to have sex
    3. they come for poor enviornments.

    So much for those that have free will... that see a solid investment for their time... those that enjoy the attention... those that see absolutely no problem with doing it... etc.

    Again, the manner in which you post suggests a negative trend.

    You see, I'm partially biased. My two first girlfriends were strippers in Australia. And you'd be amazed at the sort of attitude that "normal" people have towards strippers. My mother considers them not far removed from hookers. It was tense when my mother met my girlfriend at the time. :D

    In any case, I've heard from them the manner in which their lives went. The amount of bigotry they receive off people with no clue about their lives both professionally and personally. I'm not saying its a great life, but neither of them were mistreated. Neither of them were raped. The both had university qualifications, were highly intelligent and saw immediately that they could make more money stripping and getting groped by strangers than if they did normal work. And it was true, they were.

    And having had these as girlfriends, I had other friends in that industry. Who admitted to sleeping with customers for extra cash. And while I would never say they had "normal" personalities (it was rare i met a girl who could switch off the manipulation skills they developed), none of them were messed up.

    So when talking about porn, I think back to my own experience with strippers.. those who did have sex with customers, and those that didn't. I think of their reasons for doing what they did, in spite of the social stigma, and I don't go searching for the worst possible reason.
    I was interested in point 1. The problem is that in other industries are also women who were raped. So the question is: does this rape-elemnt is concludent for the porn industry? This is what I'd like to find out.

    Well, you'd have to do some decent research and leave your own thoughts on the matter at the door until you've gained some solid results. You're not going to find that information here, since I doubt there's many porn actors/actresses here... and from what I have read on the subject, theres very little research done on what encourages people into doing porn.

    But I'd suggest that the desire to be wealthy and famous is rather high.... and the end justifies the means.


  • Registered Users Posts: 9,348 ✭✭✭nozzferrahhtoo


    I think I said that several times. I don't have any scientific evidence, just some anecdotes, as you call them, nozzferrahhtoo.

    So basicly, I see women who enter in this industry divided in 3 categories:
    1. the ones that have been raped
    2. the ones with more testosterone -this hormone is responsable for a greater desire to have sex
    3. they come for poor enviornments.

    Again just because you think you see it that way, does not mean it IS that way. The only difference between the above and your attempt to confirum your own biases from before… is that this time you have three things and not one that you are declaring to be so and providing no evidence or causal arguments for.

    Put another way: We are not interested in HOW you see it or WHAT you think. We are interested in WHY you think it… what it is based on.

    And thus far nothing you have said appears to be based on anything except you think it… because you think it. There is nothing for us to work with here.

    You seem to want to declare that if a woman wants to enter into this industry she either has emotional, economic or hormonal issues which drive her to it.

    a) This is based on nothing that I know of and appears not to be correct.
    b) This is highly insulting to these women as it pre-judges them based on their career choice as being somehow deficient or defective and
    c) so what? Even if you were 100% right, which it appears you are not... so what? Your premise appears therefore not to be only baseless and likely false... but entirely irrelevant too.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 189 ✭✭Dr. Zeus


    I actually heard that lady speaking on Newstalk and I thought she made some valid points. I didn't get to read through all of the posts but what I did notice was that some men get very defensive when any negatives towards porn are expressed. That is a worrying trend IMO. Of course porn comes with side effects. This is like saying been exposed to advertisements does not impact people.

    There is no denying that porn culture has seeped into the mainstream. The majority of the internet is taken up with porn so we cannot say that this does not impact users in some way.

    If children as young as 11 are viewing porn that we should be talking about this. Of course this is impacting their view of sexuality. Nobody in society is talking about this. it is the massive elephant in the room.

    I have started to think more about what use of porn means for me and have started to see it in a more negative light.

    For a lot of people it is very addictive and I myself noticed in the past that previous stuff I would have found distasteful becomes more acceptable after a while! You become desensitized to what you are seeing.

    There is no doubt that there is an increase of hardcore stuff even on more vanilla sites. The author of the book interviewed porn makers in the States and they admitted that they were surprised by how hardcore/violent/degrading/abuse porn had become so mainstrean and they had a tough time keeping up with demand Why is there such a demand for violent and degrading porn? Is it a reflection of society? Why do some men need to see women being abused to get off?

    There is no doubt that a lot of porn objectifies women as mere sex objects to be used for male pleasure. I have a huge issue with the language used "whore/bitch/slut. Why is this neccessary. No-one can argue that does not degrade females. They aren't even given a first name. This is language I hear a lot of my friends using and I find it disturbing. it''s also very prevelant on another forum here. Also, some of the comments that users post on videos is disturbing and severly misognistic.

    I have also spoken to many female friends about guys coming on their faces and demanding anal and this IMO is definetely due to the porn culture making this seem like the norm.

    I know if I have watched porn during the day I find myself thinking about sex a lot more and looking at women more objectively and imaginging scenarios in my head. This has made me think about porn differently.

    I am not saying all porn is bad -it's not. I am just expressing my views as a porn viewer. While some men can separate the reality from the fantasy not all men can unfortunately and porn does blur the lines! Subconsciously even you have to be picking up some messages from porn -impossible not to. What are those messages?

    On the women being paid more than men - it's one of the few industries where they are. Why is that? Maybe to attract women into the industry and keep them there. Maybe to "compensate" for the humilitation and degradation they often suffer. I don't know.

    It's great to talk about this and I was happy to see this thread. To challenge anything to do with porn is often reduced to you're a prude and that's just bogus. Porn does have side-effects for both men and women and we need to discuss this. We need to remember that porn is a business first and foremost a very rich one and it's going to do everything it can to hook you in and keep you coming back for more.

    Let's hope this doesn't turn into a for/against debate where there is no meaningful debate. I look forward to reading the other posts in more detail.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 189 ✭✭Dr. Zeus


    Article from the Guardian about the impact of porn on men, written by a male jounrnalist. It's long but worth a read!
    There's an episode of Friends - The One With The Free Porn - in which Chandler and Joey discover they have tuned into a porn channel. And it's free. They leave the TV on, afraid switching off will mean no more pornography. By the end of the episode, Chandler is seeing the world through porn-tinted spectacles. "I was just at the bank," he complains, "and the teller didn't ask me to go do it with her in the vault." Joey, bewildered, reports a similar reaction from the pizza-delivery girl. "You know what," decides Chandler, "we have to turn off the porn."


    As a society, however, we are further from turning off the porn than we have ever been. Pornography is everywhere - it masquerades as "gentlemen's entertainment" in the form of clubs such as Spearmint Rhino, it infiltrates advertising and it will soon be available in our back pockets, thanks to a deal by adult entertainment giant Private Media Group to beam porn to UK mobile phones.
    In its hardcore form, pornography is now accessed in the UK by an estimated 33% of all internet users. Since the British Board of Film Classification relaxed its guidelines in 2000, hardcore video pornography now makes up between 13% and 17% of censors' viewing, compared with just 1% three years ago, a rate of growth that is being cited as a causal factor in the recent bankruptcy of Penthouse, at one time the very apotheosis of porno chic but in recent years little more risqué than Loaded. In the US, with the pornography industry bringing in up to $15bn (£8.9bn) annually, people spend more on porn every year than they do on movie tickets and all the performing arts combined. Each year, in Los Angeles alone, more than 10,000 hardcore pornographic films are made, against an annual Hollywood average of just 400 movies.
    Pornography is not only bigger business than ever before, it is also more acceptable, more fashionable, more of a statement of cool. From pieces "in praise of porn" in the normally sober Prospect magazine, to such programmes as Pornography: The Musical on Channel 4 last month, to Victoria Coren and Charlie Skelton's book, published last year, about making a porn film, to the news that Val Kilmer is to play the part of pornography actor John Holmes in a new mainstream movie, there is a widespread sense that anyone who suggests pornography might have any kind of adverse effect is laughably out of touch.

    Coren and Skelton, former Erotic Review film critics, focus on their flip comic narrative, scarcely troubling themselves with any deeper issues. "In all our years of watching porn," they write, in a rare moment of analysis that doesn't get developed any further, "we have never properly resolved what we think about how, why and whether it is degrading to women. We suspect that it might be. We suspect that pornography might be degrading to everybody."

    With pornography, it seems as if the sheer scale of the phenomenon has, in time-honoured capitalist fashion, conferred its own respectability; as a result, serious analysis is hard to come by. Only occasionally, amid porn-disguised-as-documentary that distinguishes much of Channel 5's late-night output, is there broadcasting that gives any kind of insight. Channel 4's documentary Hardcore, shown two years ago, told the story of Felicity, a single mother from Essex who travelled to Los Angeles hoping to make a career in pornography. Arriving excited, and clear about what she would not do - anal sex, double-vaginal penetration - she ended up being coerced into playing a submissive role and agreeing to anal sex. Felicity - the vicissitudes of whose own troubled relationship with her father were mirrored by the cruelty of the men with whom she ended up working - eventually escaped back to the UK.

    Hardcore offered a rare, unadorned look at the inside of the industry, as did Pornography: The Musical, albeit in a more surreal form, with actors interrupting sex to break into song. Yet what about the millions who consume pornography, the men - for they are, despite pornographers' claims about growing numbers of female fans, mostly men - who habitually use it? How are they affected? Is pornography, as most these days claim, a harmless masturbatory diversion? That episode of Friends, albeit with tongue in cheek, suggested a heavy diet of porn might encourage men inappropriately to expect sex. Is that true? And what about more profound effects?

    How does it affect relationships? Is it addictive? Does it encourage rape, paedophilia, sexual murder? Surely tough questions need to be asked.

    First, though, some definitions. According to the Shorter Oxford Dictionary, the word "pornography" dates to 1864, when it described "the life, manners, etc of prostitutes or their patrons". More recently, it has come to signify material, in the words of Chambers, "intended to arouse sexual excitement". Its most common themes, however, are power and submission. By contrast, "erotica", which is pretty hard to find now, carries additional connotations of "amorousness" and is far less concerned with control and domination. No, it is pornography plain and simple, from teen magazines such as Front to venerable "wrist mags" such as Playboy, to the almost daily bombardment of teaser pornographic emails, that confronts all of us on a ceaseless basis.

    The received wisdom, pushed hard by such mass-market magazines as Loaded and FHM, is that men derive a pretty uncomplicated enjoyment from pornography. That, certainly, is the argument put forward by such proponents as David Baddiel, AA Gill, who has directed his own pornographic film, and the musician Moby, who once said in an interview, "I like pornography - who doesn't? I don't really trust men who claim to not be interested in porn. We're biologically programmed to respond to the sight of people having sex." Danny Plunkett, then features editor of Loaded, takes an equally relaxed view: "We know that a lot of people enjoy it and take it with a pinch of salt. We certainly don't view it as dangerous."

    But is it as simple as this? One of my best friends is a man for whom pornography has apparently never held even the slimmest interest. Moby may choose to distrust him, but his sex life otherwise has always seemed to me perfectly robust. He is, however, so much in the minority as to seem almost an oddity.

    For most men, at some point in their lives, pornography has held a strong appeal and, before any examination of its effects, this fact has to be addressed. Like many men, I first saw pornography during puberty. At boarding school, dog-eared copies of Mayfair and Knave were stowed behind toilet cisterns; this borrow-and-return library system was considered absolutely normal, seldom commented upon and either never discovered by the masters or tacitly permitted. Long before my first sexual relationship, porn was my sex education.

    No doubt (though we'd never have admitted it then) my friends and I were driven to use porn through loneliness: being away from home, we longed for love, closeness, unquestioning acceptance. The women over whom we masturbated - the surrogate mothers, if you like - seemed to be offering this but, of course, they were never going to provide it. The untruths it taught me on top of this disappointment - that women are always available, that sex is about what a man can do to a woman - I am only now, more than two decades on, finally succeeding in unlearning.

    From men everywhere come similar stories. Nick Samuels, 46, an electrical contractor from Epping - now, with a wife and four children, the very image of respectable fatherhood - says he first discovered the power of pornographic images at the age of 16, when he found a copy of Mayfair in his father's garage. "I can even remember the picture. There was a woman walking topless past a building site and the builders were ogling her from the scaffolding. It was pretty soft stuff, but it heightened my senses and kicked off my interest in pornography. Before long, I was reading Whitehouse and then, through a friend at my squash club, I was introduced to hardcore videos."

    Si Jones, a 39-year-old north London vicar who regularly counsels men trying to "come off" pornography, admits that, for him, too, it was his introduction to sex. "As a teenager, I watched porn films with my friends at the weekend. It was just what you did. It was cool, naughty and everyone was doing it." Set against today's habit of solitary internet masturbation, Jones's collegiate introduction to porn seems peculiarly sociable. Today, boys no longer clandestinely circulate magazines after school; nor do they need to rummage through their fathers' cupboards in search of titillating material. Access to internet pornography has never been easier, its users never younger, and the heaviest demand, according to research published in the New York Times, is for " 'deviant' material including paedophilia, bondage, sadomasochism and sex acts with various animals".

    At its most basic level, pornography answers natural human curiosity. Adolescent boys want to know what sex is about, and porn certainly demonstrates the mechanics. David Morgan, consultant clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst at the Portman Clinic in London, which specialises in problems relating to sexuality and violence, describes this phase as "transitional, like a rehearsal for the real thing. The problem with pornography begins when, instead of being a temporary stop on the way to full sexual relations, it becomes a full-time place of residence." Morgan's experience of counselling men addicted to porn has convinced him that "the more time you spend in this fantasy world, the more difficult it becomes to make the transition to reality. Just like drugs, pornography provides a quick fix, a masturbatory universe people can get stuck in. This can result in their not being able to involve anyone else."

    For most men, the way pornography objectifies sex strikes a visceral emotional chord. Psychotherapists Michael Thompson and Dan Kindlon, in their book Raising Cain: Protecting The Emotional Life Of Boys, suggest that objectification, for boys, starts early. "By adolescence, a boy wakes up most mornings with an erection. This can happen whether he is in a good or bad mood, whether it is a school day or a weekend ... Boys enjoy their own physical gadgetry. But the feeling isn't always, 'Look what I can do!' The feeling is often, 'Look what it can do!' - again, a reflection of the way a boy views his instrument of sexuality as just that: an object. What people might not realise when they justly criticise men for objectifying sex - viewing sex as something you do, rather than part of a relationship - is that the first experience of objectification of sexuality in a boy's life comes from his experience of his own body, having this penis that makes its own demands."

    But the roots go back further still. Research has shown that boy babies
    are treated more harshly than their female counterparts and, as they grow up, boys are taught that success is achieved through competition. In order to deal with this harsh masculine world, boys can learn not to trust their own feelings and not to express their emotions. They become suspicious of other men, with whom they're in competition, after all, and as a result they often feel lonely and isolated.

    Yet men, as much as women, hunger for intimacy. For many males, locked into a life in which self-esteem has grown intrinsically entwined with performance, sex assumes an almost unsustainable freight of demands and needs. Not only does the act itself become almost the only means through which many men can feel intimate and close, but it is also the way in which they find validation. And sex itself, of course, cannot possibly satisfy such demands.

    It is into this troubled scenario that porn finds such easy access. For in pornography, unlike in real life, there is no criticism, real or imagined, of male performance. Women are always, in the words of the average internet site, "hot and ready", eager to please. In real life, by contrast, men find women are anything but: they have higher job status, they demand that they be sexually satisfied, and they are increasingly opting to combine career and motherhood.

    Men, say psychologists, also feel threatened by the "emotional power" they perceive women wielding over them. Unable to feel alive except when in relationships with women, they are at the same time painfully aware that their only salvation from isolation comes in being sexually acceptable to women. This sense of neediness can provoke intense anger that, all too often, finds expression in porn. Unlike real life, the pornographic world is a place in which men find their authority unchallenged and in which women are their willing, even grateful servants. "The illusion is created," as one male writer on pornography puts it, "that women are really in their rightful place and that there is, after all, no real and serious challenge to male authority."

    Seen in this light, the patently ridiculous pornography scenario of the pretty female flat-hunter (or hitch-hiker, driver with broken-down car, or any number of similar such vulnerable roles) who is happy to let herself be gang-banged by a group of overweight, hairy-shouldered couch potatoes makes perfect psychological sense.

    The porn industry, of course, dismisses such talk, yet occasionally comes a glimmer of authenticity. Bill Margold, one of the industry's longest-serving film performers, was interviewed in 1991 by psychoanalyst Robert Stoller for his book Porn: Myths For The Twentieth Century. Margold made no attempt to gloss over the realities. "My whole reason for being in this industry is to satisfy the desire of the men in the world who basically don't care much for women and want to see the men in my industry getting even with the women they couldn't have when they were growing up. So we come on a woman's face or brutalise her sexually: we're getting even for lost dreams."

    As well as "eroticising male supremacy", in the words of anti-porn campaigner John Stoltenberg, pornography also attempts to assuage other male fears, in particular that of erection failure. According to psychoanalytical thinking, pornography answers men's fetishistic need for visual proof of phallic potency. Lynne Segal, professor of psychology and gender studies at Birkbeck College, University of London, writes: "Men's specific fears of impotence, feeding off infantile castration anxiety, generate hostility towards women. Through pornography, real women can be avoided, male anxiety soothed and delusions of phallic prowess indulged, by intimations of the rock-hard, larger-than-life male organ."

    Pornography, in other words, is a lie. It peddles falsehoods about men, women and human relationships. In the name of titillation, it seduces vulnerable, lonely men - and a small number of women - with the promise of intimacy, and delivers only a transitory masturbatory fix. Increasingly, though, men are starting to be open about the effect pornography has had upon them.

    David McLeod, a marketing executive, explains the cycle: "I'm drawn to porn when I'm lonely, particularly when I'm single and sexually frustrated. But I can easily get disgusted with myself. After watching a video two or three times, I'll throw it away and vow never to watch another again. But my resolve never lasts very long." He has, he says, "seen pretty much everything. I've even seen pictures of men being buggered by a pig. But once you start going down that slope, you get very quickly jaded."

    Like many men, McLeod is torn. Quick to claim that porn has "no harmful effects", he is also happy to acknowledge the contradictory fact that it is "deadening". Andy Philips, a Leeds art dealer and, at 38, a father for the first time, says there have been times when he has been "a very heavy user". His initial reaction, like that of many of the men to whom I spoke, is studiedly jokey: "I love porn." Yet, as he grows more contemplative, he admits: "I've always used it secretly, never as part of a relationship. It's always been like the other woman on the side. It's something to do with being naughty, I guess."

    Again and again, despite now being married, he is drawn back. "You can easily get too much of it. It's deadening, nullifying, gratuitous, unsatisfying. At one point I was single for three years and I used a lot of porn then. After a while, it made me feel worse. I'd feel disgusted with myself and have a huge purge."

    Extended exposure to pornography can have a whole raft of effects. By the time Nick Samuels had reached his mid-20s, it was altering his view of what he wanted from a sexual relationship. "I used to watch porn with one of my girlfriends, and I started to want to try things I'd seen in the films: anal sex, or threesomes." Sometimes, he says, this was OK - "She was an easy-going person." At other times, "it shocked her". Married for 15 years, he admits he has carried the same sexual expectations into the marital bedroom. "There's been real friction over this: my wife simply isn't that kind of person. And it's only now, after all these years, that I'm beginning to move on from it. Porn is like alcoholism: it clings to you like a leech."

    Psychoanalyst Estela Welldon, author of the classic text Mother, Madonna, Whore, has treated couples for whom such scenarios spiralled out of control. "A lot of men involve their partners in the use of porn. Typically, they will say, 'Don't you want a better sex life?' I have seen cases in which first the woman has been subjected to porn and then they have used their own children for pornographic purposes." When couples use porn together - a growing trend, if anecdotal evidence is anything to go by - there is, says Welldon, "an illusory sense that they are getting closer together. Then they film themselves having sex and feel outside themselves. This dehumanising aspect is an important part of pornography. It dehumanises the other person, the relationship, and any intimacy."

    Even when in a loving sexual relationship, men who have used porn say that, all too often, they see their partner through a kind of "pornographic filter". This effect is summed up eloquently by US sociologist Harry Brod, in Segal's essay Sweet Sorrows, Painful Pleasures: "There have been too many times when I have guiltily resorted to impersonal fantasy because the genuine love I felt for a woman wasn't enough to convert feelings into performance. And in those sorry, secret moments, I have resented deeply my lifelong indoctrination into the aesthetic of the centrefold."

    Running like a watermark through all pornography use, according to Morgan at the Portman Clinic, is the desire for control. This need, he says, has its roots in early childhood. "A typical example might be a boy with fairly absent parents, either in emotional terms or in actual fact." The boy, wishing his parents were more present - more within his control, as it were - can grow up wishing "to find something over which he can have control. Pornography fills that space."

    But the user of pornography is also psychologically on the run, Welldon adds. "People who use pornography feel dead inside, and they are trying to avoid being aware of that pain. There is a sense of liberation, which is temporary: that's why pornography is so repetitive - you have to go back again and again."

    Lost in a world of pornographic fantasy, men can become less inclined, as well as increasingly less able, to form lasting relationships. In part, this is due to the underlying message of pornography. Ray Wyre, a specialist in sexual crime, says pornography "encourages transience, experimentation and moving between partners". Morgan goes further: "Pornography does damage," he says, "because it encourages people to make their home in shallow relationships."

    Jan Woolf believes it might also prevent a relationship getting started. A former special needs teacher, she lasted only six months in the job of BBFC censor in 2001. During this time, she watched hundreds of hours of hardcore videos. At the time, she was single. "If I'd been in the early stages of a relationship, it would have been very difficult, because I'd have been watching what I might have been expected to be doing, except it would never have been like that." She left the job because the porn was starting to make her feel "depressed - I wanted my lively mind back".

    The more powerful the sense of pre-existing internal distress, the more compelling becomes the pull towards pornography. For John-Paul Day, a 50-year-old Edinburgh architect in his first "non-addictive" sexual relationship, the experience of being a small boy with a dying mother drove him to seek solace in masturbation. He says he has been "addicted" to pornography his entire adult life. "The thing about it is that, unlike real life, it is incredibly safe," Day says. "I'm frightened of real sex, which is unscripted and unpredictable. And so I engage in pornography, which is totally under my control. But, of course, it also brings intense disappointment, precisely because it is not what I'm really searching for. It's rather like a hungry person standing outside the window of a restaurant, thinking that they're going to get fed."

    Day, who has attended meetings of Sex Addicts Anonymous for 12 years, says, "Pornography is central to my own sex addiction in as much as sex addiction has to do with the use of fantasy as a way of escaping from reality. Even in my fantasies about 'real' people, I am really transforming them into pieces of walking pornography. It is not the reality of who they are that I focus on, but the fantasy I project on to them."

    Like drugs and drink, pornography - as Day has realised - is an addictive substance. Porn actor Kelly Cooke, one of the stars of Pornography: The Musical, says this applies on either side of the camera: "It got to the point where I considered having sex the way most people consider getting a hamburger. But when you try to give it up - that's when you realise how addictive it is, both for consumers and performers. It's a class A drug, and it's hell coming off it."

    The cycle of addiction leads one way: towards ever harder material. Morgan believes "all pornography ends up with S&M". The now-infamous Carnegie Mellon study of porn on the internet found that images of hardcore sex were in far less demand than more extreme material. Images of women engaging in acts of bestiality were hugely popular, the most frequently downloaded being of a brunette with - in the pornographer's trusty lexicon - "a huge horse cock in her tight pussy".

    The mechanics of the pornographic search - craving, discovery of the "right" image, masturbation, relief - makes it, says Morgan, work like "a sort of drug, an antidepressant". The myth about porn, as a witness told the 1983 Minneapolis city council public hearings on it, is that "it frees the libido and gives men an outlet for sexual expression. This is truly a myth. I have found pornography not only does not liberate men, but on the contrary is a source of bondage. Men masturbate to pornography only to become addicted to the fantasy. There is no liberation for men in pornography. [It] becomes a source of addiction, much like alcohol. There is no temporary relief. It is mood-altering. And reinforcing, ie, 'you want more' because 'you got relief'. It is this reinforcing characteristic that leads men to want the experience they have in pornographic fantasy to happen in real life."

    In its most severe form, this can lead to sexual crime, though the links between the two remain controversial and much argued-over. Wyre, from his work with sex offenders, says, "It is impossible not to believe pornography plays a part in sexual violence. As we constantly confront sex offenders about their behaviour, they display a wide range of distorted views that they then use to excuse their behaviour, justify their actions, blame the victim and minimise the effect of their offending. They seek to make their own behaviour seem normal, and interpret the behaviour of the victim as consent, rather than a survival strategy. Pornography legitimises these views."

    One of the most extreme examples of this is Ted Bundy, the US serial sexual murderer executed for his crimes in January 1989. The night before his death, he explained his addiction to pornography in a radio interview: "It happened in stages, gradually ... My experience with ... pornography that deals on a violent level with sexuality is that, once you become addicted to it, and I look at this as a kind of addiction like other kinds of addiction, I would keep looking for more potent, more explicit, more graphic kinds of material. Like an addiction, you keep craving something which is harder, harder, something which gives you a greater sense of excitement, until you reach the point where the pornography only goes so far ... It reaches that jumping-off point where you begin to wonder if, maybe, actually doing it will give you that which is beyond just reading about it or looking at it."

    Bundy, as damaged as he was, stopped short of blaming pornography for his actions, though it was, he believed, an intrinsic part of the picture. "I tell you that I am not blaming pornography ... I take full responsibility for whatever I've done and all the things I've done ... I don't want to infer that I was some helpless kind of victim. And yet we're talking about an influence that is the influence of violent types of media and violent pornography, which was an indispensable link in the chain ... of events that led to behaviours, to the assaults, to the murders." In the understated words of Wyre, "The very least pornography does is make sexism sexy."

    The average man, of course, whatever his consumption of pornography, is no Bundy. Yet for those who have become addicted, the road to a pornography-free life can be long and arduous. Si Jones advises accountability: "Make your computer accountable, let other people check what you've been looking at."

    And the alternative to pornography, says Morgan, is not always easy. "Relationships are difficult. Intimacy, having a good relationship, loving your children, involves work. Pornography is fantasy in the place of reality. But it is just that: fantasy. Pornography is not real, and the only thing human beings get nourishment from is reality: real relationships. And, anyway, what do you want to say when you get to the end of your life? That you wish you'd spent more time **** on the internet? I hardly think so."


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 19,777 ✭✭✭✭The Corinthian


    Dr. Zeus wrote: »
    I actually heard that lady speaking on Newstalk and I thought she made some valid points.
    Pornography aside, my main issue with "that lady", aka Gail Dines, is that she is a pretty blatant misandrist. It's pretty difficult to respect someone like her when while arguing against misogyny she ironically drips with hatred towards men - something that has been raised, with evidence, earlier in this discussion if you care to look back.
    I didn't get to read through all of the posts but what I did notice was that some men get very defensive when any negatives towards porn are expressed.
    I think both sides of this debate have a tendency towards the soap box.
    If children as young as 11 are viewing porn that we should be talking about this. Of course this is impacting their view of sexuality. Nobody in society is talking about this. it is the massive elephant in the room.
    That is utterly ridiculous. Pornography and it's effects of children and society in general has been discussed for a very long time - all that is new is the Internet.

    In the past, such anti-pornography campaigners such as Mary Whitehouse made similar arguments against pornographic magazines and explicit sex on TV (anyone remember her crusade against Channel 4's 'Red Triangle' movies?) on the basis that it could fall into the hands of children. So regardless of the good or ill of pornography, it's ridiculous to suggest that this is something undiscussed.
    Is it a reflection of society? Why do some men need to see women being abused to get off?
    Why do some women (and men) get off on being abused? Why are movies such as Secretary so popular with women, rather than men?

    In reality human sexuality is, for lack of a better word, weird, and there is an entire BDSM subculture of people who are into this kind of weirdness out there. You'll even find pornography catering towards men being abused by women. Go figure.
    I have also spoken to many female friends about guys coming on their faces and demanding anal and this IMO is definetely due to the porn culture making this seem like the norm.
    Why is it definitely due to the porn culture? Unless you are at least in your late thirties, if not older, your anecdotal evidence assumes that such things did not occur prior to the Internet.

    This is not to say that facials and anal sex has not become more popular in the last ten or twenty years as a result of the Internet - this is quite possible - only that you're jumping to conclusions and ignoring the simple fact that sexual practices are changing constantly, with or without the Internet.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 189 ✭✭Dr. Zeus


    Damn this is what I hate about boards. The Pedantic Police come out in force and start nit picking.

    In response to Corinthian, first of all I apolgise I didn't remember the author's name while I was replying so I referred to her as "that lady". Forgive me. Also, I did state that I had not got time to read all the posts in advance. I did not say that Gail Dines was the gospel but I did say she made some valid points IMO. It doesn't matter if she is an alien from outer space, she still made some good points.

    You reference to the secretary made me roll around the floor. It's not exactly what I was referrring to when I was referencing abuse porn. I think that movie is mild in comparison to what is out there and maybe that's why women like it.

    With respect to the 11 year olds what I meant was that teachers/parents are not sitting down with kids and discussing what they are viewing. You barely get sex-education in this country let alone info on how viewing porn might impact you.

    If you want to think that porn is a harmless pastime with no side effects that's up to you. I think it would be helpful to think a little bit deeper about the issue and think what messages sub consciously am I picking up here- that's all.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 189 ✭✭Dr. Zeus


    QUOTEThis is not to say that facials and anal sex has not become more popular in the last ten or twenty years as a result of the Internet - this is quite possible - only that you're jumping to conclusions and ignoring the simple fact that sexual practices are changing constantly, with or without the Internet.[/QUOTE]

    I think it is very possible. Based on what female friends told me about their experiences and the guys response was "what's the big deal everyone in porn does it and I thought you would like it"

    Of course sexual practice are changing but the internet speeds things up for sure. That is undeniable


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,388 ✭✭✭gbee


    Just more feminist claptrap.
    "To think that so many men hate women to the degree that they can get aroused by such vile images is quite profound," says Dines.

    If she had not come to this conclusion, then I think much of what she says can have merit.

    however, she OBVIOUSLY does NOT understand when she uses the words "men hate women" ~ she is putting HER interpretation and slant on what should be 'independent' observations.

    There is MORE wrong with the loose morals of women today who allow men to practice porn on them. Men will do only what they can get away with ~ outside of criminal activity and rape ~ I'm not referring to this element.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,639 ✭✭✭PeakOutput


    Dolorous wrote: »
    What disturbed me most was the undertone of violence and humiliation, that this 'wh*re' being f*cked as hard as possible and reduced to a collection of orifices was apparently what men were supposed to get off on.

    i have met more women then men in my life who are into that sort of fantasy / that sort of sex so you really have no idea what your talking about. there are in fact books written on the fact that womens fantasies are usually far more extreme then mens(im trying to findthe link to it now)

    yes porn desnsitizes people to certain acts

    no it wont turn anyone into anything like arapist or an abuser

    no kids should not be able to access porn

    no porn should not be banned or controlled any more then is necessary to stop kids getting it


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,639 ✭✭✭PeakOutput


    gbee wrote: »

    There is MORE wrong with the loose morals of women today who allow men to practice porn on them

    thats complete bollix too, there is nothing wrong with sex at all ever as long as its consensual and between people of age


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 189 ✭✭Dr. Zeus


    gbee wrote: »


    There is MORE wrong with the loose morals of women today who allow men to practice porn on them. Men will do only what they can get away with ~ outside of criminal activity and rape ~ I'm not referring to this element.

    Jesus H! Are you for real? So men take no responsibilty for their actions and it is up to women to police them sexually.That is what strict Islamic regimes teach i.e uncovered women lead men into lust and therefore cannot be responsible for their actions if they rape a woman.

    BS and insulting to both men and women!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 19,777 ✭✭✭✭The Corinthian


    Dr. Zeus wrote: »
    Damn this is what I hate about boards. The Pedantic Police come out in force and start nit picking.
    I wasn't 'nit picking' - I wasn't even correcting you. Citing Ms Dines by name was relevant for me only in that we are not quoting some nameless, all knowing source, but a very questionable one with an agenda that is well documented on the Internet.
    Also, I did state that I had not got time to read all the posts in advance. I did not say that Gail Dines was the gospel but I did say she made some valid points IMO. It doesn't matter if she is an alien from outer space, she still made some good points.
    I never disputed that she may. However, I did point out that it is difficult to respect, or even trust, an argument presented by someone with what amounts to a 'hate agenda' - it would be akin to saying that the National Front make some valid points about immigration or race (which may be the case, but I would be very suspicious about such a source).
    You reference to the secretary made me roll around the floor. It's not exactly what I was referrring to when I was referencing abuse porn. I think that movie is mild in comparison to what is out there and maybe that's why women like it.
    It was anything but mild in that it explored a consensual sexual relationship that included physical abuse and degradation. What the movie was not was explicit; just as you won't see a couple in a Hollywood movie actually having sexual intercourse, in this you won't see the type of abuse and degradation that was implied and touched on.

    People are into that kind of abuse and degradation - both giving and receiving. It's never been for me, but I've come across it myself upon occasion over the years and it is not always the man that requests certain acts.

    I suppose they're all victims of Internet porn - even the ones who were like that before the Internet.
    With respect to the 11 year olds what I meant was that teachers/parents are not sitting down with kids and discussing what they are viewing. You barely get sex-education in this country let alone info on how viewing porn might impact you.
    Lack of sex education though is historically tied into societal attitudes with sex in general though, not pornography. If it was not discussed in the past, then this is a fault in society, not the pornography that forced the discussion - assuming that it was pornography that forced said discussion.

    As such I still would question relevancy of raising the issue.
    If you want to think that porn is a harmless pastime with no side effects that's up to you. I think it would be helpful to think a little bit deeper about the issue and think what messages sub consciously am I picking up here- that's all.
    You'll note that I never suggested that it is a harmless pastime with no side effects. If you read back you'll also find that I even mused that it almost certainly has side effects, although to what degree and whether they are harmful is a matter for debate.

    Ironically, along with your accusation of somehow taking you up on a point of pedantry, you appear to be as defensive in your response as those defending pornography.
    Dr. Zeus wrote: »
    I think it is very possible. Based on what female friends told me about their experiences and the guys response was "what's the big deal everyone in porn does it and I thought you would like it"
    Oh, it's possible, but you are looking at a few anecdotal examples and concluding with absolute certainty that it is. Not only that, but you are ignoring other changes in Irish society during the same period - the increased availability of contraception leading in increased sexual activity, for one.
    Of course sexual practice are changing but the internet speeds things up for sure. That is undeniable
    If you look at what you've said, it's meaningless. You accept that sexual practices are changing. You don't know how quickly they previously changed, to begin with. Then you make a simplistic assumption that because the Internet is fast, ergo this change (that must be as a result of the Internet) has also accelerated.

    It sounds more like a snappy soundbite than an argument, TBH.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 189 ✭✭Dr. Zeus


    IIf you look at what you've said, it's meaningless. You accept that sexual practices are changing. You don't know how quickly they previously changed, to begin with. Then you make a simplistic assumption that because the Internet is fast, ergo this change (that must be as a result of the Internet) has also accelerated.

    It sounds more like a snappy soundbite than an argument, TBH.

    The internet had made porn widely accesible that is undeniable. Of course this is going to have an impact. Has the availabilty of music on the internet changed the way we consume music - yes it has. Somebody posting themselves on youtube can become an overnight sensation.

    The internet has faciliated wide access to child abuse imagery and connected tonnes of child abusers who file share etc.This would not be possible without the internet as these abuser would not necessarily have made contact with each other in the real world.

    You can access porn at the touch of a button, on a mobile phone etc. OF course this has impacts


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