Jeremy Clarkson suspended

El_Duderino 09 · 01-04-2015 07:51AM

I've no idea if this is legit but there's a prescribed path to take in cases like this. American pastors and politicians have it down to a science. Think pastor Ted Haggard or that politician who said he was uncontactable because he was hiking, when he was in South America with his Argentine mistress.

First comes hard work that results in success, then the pride before the inevitable fall (everybody loves to see the big man fall). Then they see the light and confess their sins in front of the public. Then go to the relevant counselling, usually one o the following; AA, NA, pray away the gay, sex addiction or the most likely rehab in this situation, anger management. He could do it ironically and go for huggy huggy sensitivity and diversity training.

Then once the celebrity has been sufficiently humiliated... the comeback tour/election bid /mega church launch. And redemption has been achieved.

Simples

dr.fuzzenstein · 01-04-2015 08:04AM

I hear Top Gear is going to Mike Brewer and Ed China.

kylith · 01-04-2015 08:11AM

dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »

I hear Top Gear is going to Mike Brewer and Ed China.

Mike Brewer, no, but I'd watch the hell out of a Top Gear with Edd China and Fuzz from Car S.O.S.

Cienciano · 01-04-2015 08:19AM

Edd China would be brilliant.

dr.fuzzenstein · 01-04-2015 08:24AM

kylith wrote: »

Mike Brewer, no, but I'd watch the hell out of a Top Gear with Edd China and Fuzz from Car S.O.S.

Would be a change if it went to people who actually knew about cars.
As car shows Wheeler Dealers and Car SOS are absolutely brilliant. I could watch Ed take a rear diff apart for hours. And I have.
And it's even practical! In one episode Ed replaces the steering box for a W123 Merc. And guess what? I had to do the exact same on a W123 I owned at the time, so it saved me the mechanic fee.
I wonder every day why I do it to myself. It's terrible when you crawl under a car in the middle of winter in a cold, cramped, dirty garage, but it's my idea of fun and I'm sticking with it!:D

dr.fuzzenstein · 01-04-2015 08:27AM

Actually, now I remember, Ed was on TG before, he brought along his motorized sofa and some other contraptions I think. Pity he didn't become a regular, but I'd say they copped on to the fact that an actual mechanic would make the others look stupid.Which is not hard.

kylith · 01-04-2015 08:27AM

dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »

Would be a change if it went to people who actually knew about cars.
As car shows Wheeler Dealers and Car SOS are absolutely brilliant. I could watch Ed take a rear diff apart for hours. And I have.
And it's even practical! In one episode Ed replaces the steering box for a W123 Merc. And guess what? I had to do the exact same on a W123 I owned at the time, so it saved me the mechanic fee.
I wonder every day why I do it to myself. It's terrible when you crawl under a car in the middle of winter in a cold, cramped, dirty garage, but it's my idea of fun and I'm sticking with it!:D

I love those programmes and I don't even have/particularly like cars. They're just fantastic.

jimgoose · 01-04-2015 08:53AM

dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »

Actually, now I remember, Ed was on TG before, he brought along his motorized sofa and some other contraptions I think. Pity he didn't become a regular, but I'd say they copped on to the fact that an actual mechanic would make the others look stupid.Which is not hard.

As Mike would say, that boy's a genius!

Brendan Bendar · 01-04-2015 08:55AM

dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »

Would be a change if it went to people who actually knew about cars.
As car shows Wheeler Dealers and Car SOS are absolutely brilliant. I could watch Ed take a rear diff apart for hours. And I have.
And it's even practical! In one episode Ed replaces the steering box for a W123 Merc. And guess what? I had to do the exact same on a W123 I owned at the time, so it saved me the mechanic fee.
I wonder every day why I do it to myself. It's terrible when you crawl under a car in the middle of winter in a cold, cramped, dirty garage, but it's my idea of fun and I'm sticking with it!:D

Each to his own Dr, wouldn't do anything for me, but if that's your bag, enjoy it:p

tipptom · 01-04-2015 11:50AM

Bench Press wrote: »

Jezza is coming back already!!! Brilliant! You can't keep a good man down

Jeremy Clarkson to appear on rebranded Top Gear live shows

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-32137424

Oh,I do hope no Irish mucksavages turns up and cause you shame.

My name is URL · 01-04-2015 02:37PM

All three presenter's pictures have been removed from the Top Gear site. Only The Stig is there now

http://www.topgear.com/uk/

Junkyard Tom · 01-04-2015 02:43PM

dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »

Would be a change if it went to people who actually knew about cars. As car shows Wheeler Dealers and Car SOS are absolutely brilliant. I could watch Ed take a rear diff apart for hours. And I have.

I too enjoy Wheeler Dealers (apart from the 'profit' bit at the end) but viewers of that show are largely not the target audience of Top Gear.

ScumLord · 01-04-2015 02:56PM

dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »

but I'd say they copped on to the fact that an actual mechanic would make the others look stupid.Which is not hard.

You're comparing apples and oranges though. The guys from wheeler dealers have a good show format that suits a particular audience. The people that watch top gear don't necessarily want to hear from a mechanic who can tell them what type of oil filter a particular car took.

Clarkson had the unique experience of trying lots of rare and unusual cars, cars the wheeler dealer guys would probably never get a chance to drive despite their expertise and fame. I very much doubt Clarkson is as uninformed about the cars he is driving as he lets on. He was a unique viewpoint and sells himself as someone who knows nothing about the mechanics but just enjoys the car.

I love watching Chris Harris and he has a great on screen personality but all these people are car geeks. They pore over the details and stats, as much as I like cars I have little interest in stats. I want to see a show where they do something crazy with these cars.

dr.fuzzenstein · 01-04-2015 02:57PM

Junkyard Cat wrote: »

I too enjoy Wheeler Dealers (apart from the 'profit' bit at the end) but viewers of that show are largely not the target audience of Top Gear.

Worst negotiator in the world. I call him origami, because he folds immediately.

dr.fuzzenstein · 01-04-2015 03:19PM

ScumLord wrote: »

You're comparing apples and oranges though. The guys from wheeler dealers have a good show format that suits a particular audience. The people that watch top gear don't necessarily want to hear from a mechanic who can tell them what type of oil filter a particular car took.

Clarkson had the unique experience of trying lots of rare and unusual cars, cars the wheeler dealer guys would probably never get a chance to drive despite their expertise and fame. I very much doubt Clarkson is as uninformed about the cars he is driving as he lets on. He was a unique viewpoint and sells himself as someone who knows nothing about the mechanics but just enjoys the car.

I love watching Chris Harris and he has a great on screen personality but all these people are car geeks. They pore over the details and stats, as much as I like cars I have little interest in stats. I want to see a show where they do something crazy with these cars.

Of course, no argument there.
I do enjoy both shows for entirely different reasons.

Dravokivich · 01-04-2015 03:29PM

ScumLord wrote: »

You're comparing apples and oranges though. The guys from wheeler dealers have a good show format that suits a particular audience. The people that watch top gear don't necessarily want to hear from a mechanic who can tell them what type of oil filter a particular car took.

Clarkson had the unique experience of trying lots of rare and unusual cars, cars the wheeler dealer guys would probably never get a chance to drive despite their expertise and fame. I very much doubt Clarkson is as uninformed about the cars he is driving as he lets on. He was a unique viewpoint and sells himself as someone who knows nothing about the mechanics but just enjoys the car.

I love watching Chris Harris and he has a great on screen personality but all these people are car geeks. They pore over the details and stats, as much as I like cars I have little interest in stats. I want to see a show where they do something crazy with these cars.

Edd has really come on over the last few seasons of Wheeler Dealers where he takes on more of a presenter role from Mike. I think he could fill May's quirky nerd type of spot without getting too over bearing quite well.

Harry Palmr · 01-04-2015 03:32PM

My name is URL wrote: »

All three presenter's pictures have been removed from the Top Gear site. Only The Stig is there now

http://www.topgear.com/uk/

That could be any old Stig though! (a sort of philosophical poser that)

Junkyard Tom · 01-04-2015 03:34PM

dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »

Worst negotiator in the world. I call him origami, because he folds immediately.

And the numerous hours of labour costs are never included in the final bill rendering Wheeler Dealer's use of the word 'profit' redundant.

Dravokivich · 01-04-2015 03:37PM

Junkyard Cat wrote: »

And the numerous hours of labour costs are never included in the final bill rendering Wheeler Dealer's use of the word 'profit' redundant.

Wheeler Dealers is an advice show on what to look out for when getting second hand cars, masquerading as savvy business.

MEGA BRO WOLF 5000 · 01-04-2015 03:41PM

You can't Compare the two shows.

Top Gear is about a bunch of lads doing laddish things all over the world...they just happen to be in cars while wheeler dealers is actually about cars. Like both shows but I'd rather watch ed China take a gearbox apart than watch Richard Hammonds face.

ScumLord · 01-04-2015 05:40PM

The Honey Monster wrote: »

I'd rather watch ed China take a gearbox apart than watch Richard Hammonds face.

What if it was Ed China taking apart Hammonds face?

MEGA BRO WOLF 5000 · 01-04-2015 05:52PM

ScumLord wrote: »

What if it was Ed China taking apart Hammonds face?

Now that I'd watch.

Mint Aero · 01-04-2015 06:12PM

It's astonishing to see people who can't quite grasp the concept of Top Gear, the mind boggles.

Cienciano · 01-04-2015 06:30PM

Wheeler dealers isn't about selling at the end. Same way top gear isn't about exotic car reviews. Its just car porn

dr.fuzzenstein · 01-04-2015 08:45PM

Cienciano wrote: »

Wheeler dealers isn't about selling at the end. Same way top gear isn't about exotic car reviews. Its just car porn

:P

Capt'n Midnight · 01-04-2015 10:39PM

Joe Doe wrote: »

Would like to see that nice lady (Porsche racing driver & used car trader) Rebecca Jackson also, nice.

Or Sabine Schmitz.

Clarkson got around the Nürburgring ring in an S Type Jaguar in 9:59 which beat her time by 9 seconds. Her time in a Ford Transit.

Perhaps they could do Top Gear like the way Have I Got News For You uses guest presenters since yer man dirtied his bib.

My name is URL · 01-04-2015 11:43PM

My name is URL wrote: »

All three presenter's pictures have been removed from the Top Gear site. Only The Stig is there now

http://www.topgear.com/uk/

lol.. just saw this pointed out elsewhere.

Anyone know what those three cars are in the reflection of Stig's helmet?

:pac:

http://www.topgear.com/uk/assets/images/core/topgear-cast.png

That's either the most brilliant and subtle April Fool's joke ever or else a very strong statement!

ScumLord · 02-04-2015 10:37AM

My name is URL wrote: »

Anyone know what those three cars are in the reflection of Stig's helmet?

Looks like the three hypercars they were supposed to race, the La Ferrari, P1 and 918. How dare they mock us like this.

dr.fuzzenstein · 02-04-2015 10:48AM

ScumLord wrote: »

Looks like the three hypercars they were supposed to race, the La Ferrari, P1 and 918. How dare they mock us like this.

Maybe they're still doing it with the new lineup.

Kirby · 02-04-2015 11:00AM

Capt'n Midnight wrote: »

Or Sabine Schmitz.

Clarkson got around the Nürburgring ring in an S Type Jaguar in 9:59 which beat her time by 9 seconds. Her time in a Ford Transit.

Context needed here. Sabine has several thousand laps of the Nurburgring under her belt. Clarkson does not. She knew it like the back of her hand. Shes faster than most round there.

If you recall when they raced in identical cars on an unfamiliar track the following season, she couldn't lose him. He stayed right with her.

I'm not for one second questioning her ability, but that wasn't the best example of it.

Jeremy Clarkson suspended

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