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Limerick mum and five children told ‘go to hostel’

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    #152
    Electric Sheep
    Registered Users Posts: 2,106 ✭✭✭Electric Sheep


    masculinist wrote: »
    Women can choose to abort, adopt, give away the baby etc. They can choose to have a baby or not have a baby but a man has zero choice. It's not fair could be the point being made. Why cant a man give up his rights and responsibilities towards a child if a woman wants to have that child on her own ? I couldn't do it but I can see the logic of it. Why can women choose to put the child up for adoption but not the man ? many men are lied to by women who got pregnant on purpose and against agreement. I can link to hundreds of articles about it. Some women have poked holes in condoms. And even worse stories abound about used condoms being retrieved and emptied... but in each case the man cannot give up his rights and legal responsibilities ... even under age boys who got raped by older women are forced into paying child support in some places...

    None of this can happen if he keeps it in his pants.


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    #153
    Gatling
    Registered Users Posts: 40,291 ✭✭✭✭Gatling


    sup_dude wrote: »
    Not sure how it does when it falls on deaf ears. It's more like people just want to have a go at spreading crap that the media created in the first place, and don't want to let reality get in the way of that

    What crap exactly .

    Everything posted have been backed up by fact .

    Care to counter an argument
    360_F_102352090_ie3kLjDIvgrT1sxVDknWCUh8PxgMYzM7.jpg




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    #154
    KERSPLAT!
    Closed Accounts Posts: 31,152 ✭✭✭✭KERSPLAT!


    sup_dude wrote: »
    Not sure how it does when it falls on deaf ears. It's more like people just want to have a go at spreading crap that the media created in the first place, and don't want to let reality get in the way of that

    MOD

    You've made your point regarding the thread, discuss the topic or don't, it's up to you.

    Back on topic please


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    #155
    Rightwing
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,101 ✭✭✭Rightwing


    G2ECE wrote: »
    For me the most galling aspect of the story is that she expects not only to have a house handed to her but she is trying to dictate where the house should be.

    Beggars belief!

    I don't think it's an unreasonable request looking to move to Garryowen.

    LK Council have a lot to answer for.


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    #156
    RDM_83 again
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,116 ✭✭✭RDM_83 again


    waffleman wrote: »
    337 per week for single parent family??

    That seems crazy

    How is that payment broken down? Per child per week?

    Is it that crazy though? I've no kids but I can imagine they are bloody expensive.
    I just find it pretty hard to get that outraged about single parents receiving decent financial support if the money is actually spent on the kids having a decent upbringing.
    You don't even have to argue it from the moral stand of a child not suffering because of a parents choices, even with a cynical unemotional purely financial viewpoint, looking at long term costs, if the kids go onto become productive members of society it is most likely a worthwhile investment.

    That said its just stupid that the state penalises you for being in a relationship, the payments should be equalised so that there isn't the current disincentive for the father to live with his kids.
    Also should be happy enough to receive housing where-ever it is as long as its fit for purpose (kids can share rooms!).


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    #157
    masculinist
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,616 ✭✭✭masculinist


    a house where and when you want it is taking the pi**

    However ... as great as free money sounds , its still not a lot to raise 5 kids on. Some are great moms but I fear some just have kids so they can drink and smoke the extra money so the poor mites get even less. Thats why some infamous nightclubs have been allegedly packed on ''pay day'' for single moms.


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    #158
    Streetwalker
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,906 ✭✭✭Streetwalker


    Poor woman. Must be a terrible situation to be in. I wish her all the best.


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    #159
    m5ex9oqjawdg2i
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,221 ✭✭✭✭m5ex9oqjawdg2i


    Plenty of humans in this thread I see...


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    #160
    masculinist
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,616 ✭✭✭masculinist


    Electric Sheep wrote: »
    None of this can happen if he keeps it in his pants.

    None of this can happen if she keeps her knickers on. You have an extremely one dimensional view of life.


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    #161
    diograis
    Registered Users Posts: 435 ✭✭diograis


    My mentally ill uncle who has easily a few hundred grand in savings had the HSE pay to paint his kitchen for some reason, they also paid for the taxis to visit his mother in the nursing home. Bizarre country we live in sometimes...


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    #162
    Electric Sheep
    Registered Users Posts: 2,106 ✭✭✭Electric Sheep


    masculinist wrote: »
    None of this can happen if she keeps her knickers on. You have an extremely one dimensional view of life.

    But according to you it is the men who are being victimised. They could prevent this by not having sex with random women.


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    #163
    Stheno
    Moderators, Business & Finance Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 51,687 Mod ✭✭✭✭Stheno


    Streetwalker wrote: »
    Poor woman. Must be a terrible situation to be in. I wish her all the best.

    regardless of this womans circumstances, there is a growing issue for those who rent when their landlords end up with receivers being appointed.

    The tenants then lose all rights regardless of whether or not they have been paying their rent, and are in a dreadful situation. I heard a show on this with Matt Cooper a few months ago and estimates for Dublin alone were 2,000 households renting houses in receivership, and powerless to prevent themselves being evicted.


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    #164
    masculinist
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,616 ✭✭✭masculinist


    Electric Sheep wrote: »
    But according to you it is the men who are being victimised. They could prevent this by not having sex with random women.

    Listen to yourself. You came to this thread with a closed mind. Unlike me. I do not engage in stereotypes but you apparently do.
    Are you seriously saying that no men are victimised ? And that the only victims are women ?


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    #165
    Frank O. Pinion
    Registered Users Posts: 1,584 ✭✭✭Frank O. Pinion


    Autonomous wrote: »
    Hard to feel sorry for someone who decides to bring 5 kids into world
    Yeah, what is with women in Ireland not getting abortions for children they can't afford to raise. Right?


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    #166
    YFlyer
    Registered Users Posts: 9,717 ✭✭✭YFlyer


    She is on Badoo. I clicked the love heart, so will let yee know if she responds :)


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    #167
    mrsbyrne
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,228 ✭✭✭mrsbyrne


    Frank O. Pinion wrote: »
    Yeah, what is with women in Ireland not getting abortions for children they can't afford to raise. Right?

    How about an adult woman taking responsibility to ensure she doesn'tget pregnant in the first place?


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    #168
    Bipolar Joe
    Registered Users Posts: 3,443 ✭✭✭Bipolar Joe


    Frank O. Pinion wrote: »
    Yeah, what is with women in Ireland not getting abortions for children they can't afford to raise. Right?

    Or, y'know, keep their fanny shut.


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    #169
    Frank O. Pinion
    Registered Users Posts: 1,584 ✭✭✭Frank O. Pinion


    mrsbyrne wrote: »
    How about an adult woman taking responsibility to ensure she doesn'tget pregnant in the first place?
    Unless she can travel through time, that advice isn't worth much to her now, with five children born and alive, is it?

    "Hey love, you have a few kids and you have money issues? Maybe try not getting pregnant!?" Gee, thanks lady.


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    #170
    eviltwin
    Registered Users Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    Let's just bring back laundries and forced adoption :rolleyes:


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    #171
    lukesmom
    Registered Users Posts: 4,400 ✭✭✭lukesmom


    Cannot imagine being faced with having to move my kids into a hostel. You are all so smart up on your Ivory towers, just thank your lucky stars it's not you in that situation.


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    #172
    Ave Sodalis
    Registered Users Posts: 7,549 ✭✭✭Ave Sodalis


    mrsbyrne wrote: »
    How about an adult woman taking responsibility to ensure she doesn'tget pregnant in the first place?

    Were you not giving out about Medical Cards a few posts back?


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    #173
    YFlyer
    Registered Users Posts: 9,717 ✭✭✭YFlyer


    Bipolar Joe wrote: »
    Or, y'know, keep their fanny shut.

    But but but she is allowed to spread her legs or not. Its the man that takes sole responsibility if she gets pregnant.


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    #174
    masculinist
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,616 ✭✭✭masculinist


    Frank O. Pinion wrote: »
    Unless she can travel through time, that advice isn't worth much to her now, with five children born and alive, is it?

    "Hey love, you have a few kids and you have money issues? Maybe try not getting pregnant!?" Gee, thanks lady.


    These types of conversations are not so much for her benefit [as that bird has already flown its coop] but for the education of those who might follow in her footsteps - and the future outcomes of the future kids of those who follow in her footsteps. And who is to say she wont have any more kids ?


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    #175
    ceadaoin.
    Registered Users Posts: 8,154 ✭✭✭ceadaoin.


    She's already on rent allowance, why can't she just find somewhere else to rent? How come a hostel or homelessness are her only options? This happens all time and people don't demand the council provides a house. They find somewhere else to live within their budget and move. Am I missing something? Why does she think that somehow she is special and should have a house bought for her?!


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    #176
    P. Breathnach
    Registered Users Posts: 12,089 ✭✭✭✭P. Breathnach


    It is remarkable how much the average AH poster knows about the relationship history of strangers.


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    #177
    Stheno
    Moderators, Business & Finance Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 51,687 Mod ✭✭✭✭Stheno


    lukesmom wrote: »
    Cannot imagine being faced with having to move my kids into a hostel. You are all so smart up on your Ivory towers, just thank your lucky stars it's not you in that situation.

    This womans story is a bit like your friends story that you posted about, she is not willing to move anywhere to settle her kids, but instead expects somewhere she wants.
    ceadaoin. wrote: »
    She's already on rent allowance, why can't she just find somewhere else to rent? How come a hostel or homelessness are her only options? This happens all time and people don't demand the council provides a house. They find somewhere else to live within their budget and move. Am I missing something? Why does she think that somehow she is special and should have a house bought for her?!

    She appears to be suffering from address snobbery, will only live where she deems suitable.


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    #178
    ahnowbrowncow
    Registered Users Posts: 2,565 ✭✭✭ahnowbrowncow


    Iwasfrozen wrote: »
    Last time I checked it took two parties to make babies.

    I know a girl who got pregnant at just one party


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    #179
    Frank O. Pinion
    Registered Users Posts: 1,584 ✭✭✭Frank O. Pinion


    masculinist wrote: »
    These types of conversations are not so much for her benefit [as that bird has already flown its coop] but for the education of those who might follow in her footsteps - and the future outcomes of the future kids of those who follow in her footsteps. And who is to say she wont have any more kids ?
    Every time a story like this comes up, there's a bunch of people saying things like, "...she should have kept her fanny shut", talking about the woman in question. Maybe "she" should have, but saying that after the fact isn't great advice and isn't going to help her in the present, or magically stop her from (possibly) having children in the future.

    "Keep your fanny shut!" Why didn't I think of that?


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    #180
    One eyed Jack
    Registered Users Posts: 23,695 ✭✭✭✭One eyed Jack


    ceadaoin. wrote: »
    She's already on rent allowance, why can't she just find somewhere else to rent?


    Private landlords now are very reluctant to take welfare tenants (those on RA and other schemes in the pipeline that have been passed recently into legislation - HAP scheme), so a welfare tenant with children, five children? The odds of her being able to find somewhere else to rent, let alone somewhere suitable for her five children, ignoring all the other logistics such as available school places and so on, are nigh on impossible.

    How come a hostel or homelessness are her only options?


    See above, as well as the fact that the Housing Authority waiting lists are measured in years at this stage, as opposed to weeks! Temporary accommodation may be the only viable solution as council housing just isn't available.

    This happens all time and people don't demand the council provides a house. They find somewhere else to live within their budget and move. Am I missing something?


    Tbh you're missing an awful lot more than could be explained simply in one post. That's not trying to be smart or anything, but there does seem to be a huge amount of misinformation and lack of understanding in this thread, ill informed opinions and so on. I neither have the time, nor the inclination to address them all.

    Why does she think that somehow she is special and should have a house bought for her?!


    Do you believe everything you read in the media, or do you believe only what suits you? Rhetorical question by way of pointing out that the media spin and twist stories all the time to make better copy, and with certain organisations involved looking to raise their public profile, perception is everything, so none of us here would be privy to the full facts of this specific case. There are cases similar to this, and some in more direct need of housing provision, but for many reasons, their cases aren't highlighted, one of the main reasons being that they're reluctant to have their personal lives shredded apart and subjected to speculation and derision in, ahem, Ireland's biggest online "community".

    As far as Ireland thinks it's come in terms of social progression and learning from the mistakes of the past in the last 20 years, it only takes a story like this to be reminded that Irish society really hasn't changed that much at all.


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    #181
    Stheno
    Moderators, Business & Finance Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 51,687 Mod ✭✭✭✭Stheno


    Frank O. Pinion wrote: »
    Every time a story like this comes up, there's a bunch of people saying things like, "...she should have kept her fanny shut", talking about the woman in question. Maybe "she" should have, but saying that after the fact isn't great advice and isn't going to help her in the present, or magically stop her from (possibly) having children in the future.

    "Keep your fanny shut!" Why didn't I think of that?

    You have to wonder why a woman ends up alone and with five kids, and no support from the father, and I'm posting that as a woman who had to pay her ex husband maintenance for years;

    Is it lack of education?
    Is it the welfare state?
    Is it a culture of living off the welfare state that breeds a generation who feel they are entitled?


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