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How much € should parents take off grown-up children towards their keep per week
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Micky Dolenz wrote: »In Italy it is extremely common for people in their 30's to be living at home. I was shocked to hear that it is also very very common for the parents to buy their childs first home. Suppose it's the only sure way of getting shot of them
I'd rather live in the street than have me Ma still washing my jocks.darkpagandeath wrote: »Wow, These attitudes would explain a lot. Some of my mates parents have died, And there has been absolute war between them and their siblings. Must be the same attitudes of its my home.
Difference is that the stay at home kids wait until the parents kick the bucket then the huge sibling disputes kick in over who owns the house and land. The amount of fighting i have seen over land and house ownership is crazy.
Take Nox for example, he purports that this parents house is also his. I presume his sister has the same ideology. What happens when the parents one day pass on. Who gets the house and land in the will? If they both get it and have their own families they are both not going to move in together and therefore in this type of scenario usually litigation and family feuds begin. If one gets the property over the other then the troubles still continue as the both siblings were raised in a fashion to believe they both own the house.
The idea that a parents house is also your house is a complete naive fallacy if you have siblings.
Enjoy your mother still washing your underway and mashing your spuds for you as an adult because the money you are saving will one day need to be spent on solicitors to fight your siblings
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There would be no dispute if there was a will thoughDifference is that the stay at home kids wait until the parents kick the bucket then the huge sibling disputes kick in over who owns the house and land. The amount of fighting i have seen over land and house ownership is crazy.
Take Nox for example, he purports that this parents house is also his. I presume his sister has the same ideology. What happens when the parents one day pass on. Who gets the house and land in the will? If they both get it and have their own families they are both not going to move in together and therefore in this type of scenario usually litigation and family feuds begin. If one gets the property over the other then the troubles still continue as the both siblings were raised in a fashion to believe they both own the house.
The idea that a parents house is also your house is a complete naive fallacy if you have siblings.
Enjoy your mother still washing your underway and mashing your spuds for you as an adult because the money you are saving will one day need to be spent on solicitors to fight your siblings0 -
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Kash Noisy Room wrote: »Land to the son obviously!
What's your sister's opinion of this. Do you seriously think she will be happy to let you take the land and house. If she has anywhere near the same sense of entitlement that you do, she will fight all the way.
Good luck with that.
Its one of the negatives of stay at home children that not only do they lack true independence, they tend to be spoilt with a major sense of entitlement! Additionally the mammys tend to not be impressed when some man or woman shows up ready to steal her precious darling children away and cut the apron strings.When i was at home and on the dole i gave €75 out of €188 a week to my parents. I was never and still am not a mammies boy if any of ye are wondering!
Thats a little different. You were not working and still contributing so you were not a spoilt leech like some others.
Anyone earning a good wage and still leeching of their parents should be ashamed of themselves. I guess some people just refuse to grow up though!0 -
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I've two brothers and a sister in their twenties who all live in my parents house. Both brothers are currently unemployed, and my sister is in college. None of them pay my parents anything.
The only money my sister gets is from babysitting, and she uses it to cover college costs etc and very rarely looks for money from my parents for anything, so that's fair enough.
As for my brothers, they're both getting JSA, I'm not sure how much exactly but it's not the full rate. So I guess it's fair enough that they're not paying their way - they need some little bit of money for themselves. But what annoys me is that my parents do everything for them - laundry, cooking etc. My dad even brings them breakfast in bed when they ask him to, it's ridiculous! Since they're sitting at home and not doing much else, they should be doing pretty much everything around the house.
Also, even when one of them was working until quite recently, he still lived at home (even though he was working in a different county, over an hour away on the bus.) And my dad used to wake him up in the mornings, make his breakfast, then drive him to the bus station (which would be a fifteen minute walk away) at 7am. And he still didn't hand over any money, even though he was making a decent amount.
There are no jobs going in the local area, and they know this. They'd both have enough savings that they could move to Dublin or abroad if they wanted to, and they'd probably have little trouble getting a job if they did so. But they're so unmotivated to do so, when they have it so cushy at home. :rolleyes: I've often told my parents that they're doing them no favours by letting them have it so easy. But my parents just love having them around, so they're unlikely to change their ways any time soon.
Myself and their other older siblings couldn't wait to move away and get a bit of independence as soon as we finished secondary school. I don't know how those two ended up being such spoilt lazyarses!
Oh and as for the poster above who has his mam do his laundry ... jaysus! I had to laugh at the image of a grown man handing his mammy his dirty jocks and socks for her to wash them! Don't you even feel a little bit silly and embarrassed arriving home with that stuff? How would you feel if your mam arrived at your house with all her clothes and undies and expected you to wash them? It's just weird!!! 0 -
Kash Noisy Room wrote: »Your self and your condescending sh*t is quite funny. Your life sounds pretty damn **** to me, cut of form your family at an eairly age, I wouldn't wish it on a dog...not something I ever want. Good luck to yourself and your foreign "women" my girlfriend of a few years is perfectly happy with my situation.
And yes as my dad and his dad before him land to the son (minus a small few acres) and my two sisters know that's how things work , i never mentioned the house but as I plan to build my own house beside the home house I won't need the house!!.
My life is sh1t according to you because i have been washing my own jocks and wiping my own arse for a long time. Each to their own i suppose, but it sounds like a pretty sh1t life to still be suckling at mammy's teet and nearly 30
Also good to see that women are second class citizens in your house. I can see the women are probably conditioned in your home to expect to have to take care of the men even as adults.
Fair play yourself, condescending to others who live independently, not sponging of others and expecting the women to take a passive servants role in life.
My mother would laugh me out the door if i gave her my jocks to wash. My grandmother on the other hand would do it and ask if i wanted them ironed too. She is of an aged generation where she was conditioned to believe that men need to be taken care of all their lives by the women.
I hope your girlfriend is okay with taking care of you if you manage to wean yourself from your mother and move in with her otherwise it will be a shock.
Of course some women will overlook such things if they think they are marrying into land and houses. Id prefer to have no part in a woman such as this but again each to their own. Personally i prefer women that look down on mammy boys and recognize real men for what they are. Foreign women are excellent at this. Some irish girls are pretty good too but some are trapped in time warp families that dont teach what a real man is
Right time to back to my very enjoyable life. I might give the family a call later to say hello because strangely enough, just because my mother doesn't cut my sausages and mash my spuds doesnt actually mean i am cut off from them
I guess the weird breastfeed 4 year olds might look down on bottle feed 2 year olds as having a sh1t life too0 -
My life is sh1t according to you because i have been washing my own jocks and wiping my own arse for a long time. Each to their own i suppose, but it sounds like a pretty sh1t life to still be suckling at mammy's teet and nearly 30
Also good to see that women are second class citizens in your house. I can see the women are probably conditioned in your home to expect to have to take care of the men even as adults.
Fair play yourself, condescending to others who live independently, not sponging of others and expecting the women to take a passive servants role in life.
My mother would laugh me out the door if i gave her my jocks to wash. My grandmother on the other hand would do it and ask if i wanted them ironed too. She is of an aged generation where she was conditioned to believe that men need to be taken care of all their lives by the women.
I hope your girlfriend is okay with taking care of you if you manage to wean yourself from your mother and move in with her otherwise it will be a shock.
Of course some women will overlook such things if they think they are marrying into land and houses. Id prefer to have no part in a woman such as this but again each to their own.
Right time to back to my very enjoyable life. I might give the family a call later to say hello because strangely enough, just because my mother doesn't cut my sausages and mash my spuds doesnt actually mean i am cut off from them
I guess the weird breastfeed 4 year olds might look down on bottle feed 2 year olds as having a sh1t life too
You are so far of the mark on everything you are saying it's not even worth formulating a reply. So many assumptions, no allowance for middle ground etc . You have decided how my life works and you are way off the mark. On the other hand when I hear a person who had to move out at 17 I actually pity them. I would much rather be involved in my parents life day to day (and vice versa) than having an odd chat and meeting them now and again.0 -
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