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wedding invitation - "no posting of pic's on social media site's"

1246

Comments

  • #92
    homemadecider
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,858 ✭✭✭homemadecider


    I think people honestly over-inflate the importance of their wedding day. Genuinely, hardly anyone will notice or give a sh1t if you have pics on facebook or other social media. The request on invites to avoid posting to social media reeks of diva-ness to me.

    I understand people get caught up in their wedding day, but this is beyond precious and would annoy me. You're getting married, it doesn't make you a celebrity. Just relax and enjoy the day.


  • #93
    shewasdiesel
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 138 ✭✭shewasdiesel


    Princess Peach wrote: »
    I don't think it's really that crass to put it on an invite, if it's what's the hosts want.

    I was bullied a few years ago on Facebook, through photos of me appearing on a friend of a friend's profile, that were then tagged with horrible comments by some other random guy I barely knew. Now I rarely even pose for photos, I was always very self conscious even before that!

    If I have a big wedding I would possible make this request. You can call me precious but it would make me happy and confident on the day knowing that my photos won't be judged and commented on by so many people.

    I think it's just a pity the obvious has to be explained to some people. There will always be a few behind the back whiners at a wedding who are not really interested in being friends to Bride and Groom at all. They'd be better to do the honest thing and decline the invitation.


  • #94
    fro9etb8j5qsl2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,391 ✭✭✭fro9etb8j5qsl2


    Pipmae wrote: »
    I was due my third baby in August 2011. I warned my family members that nothing was to be posted on social media, particularly Facebook, until DH or I gave the go ahead.

    There were certain people we wanted to speak directly to tell them our good news. We didn't want every Joe Soap who is a friend of a friend of a friend knowing when the baby arrived before one of our good friends or a relative who isn't on FB. The last thing we wanted was one of them hearing it like that.

    I totally agree with what that invite. I hope the guest respect the request.

    This didn't even occur to me until a distant relative of my OH wrote a big long maudlin post congratulating him (and only him, no mention of me) less than 10 minutes after our baby was born. To say I was livid is an understatement :mad: Made worse by the fact that he isn't even close to this woman. I already have him warned that this time around, we are both disabling other people's ability to post on our pages or tag us in posts until we want to give an update ourselves.

    On topic, OP so what if she is always commenting on things that other people choose to put up themselves. I think it's ridiculous that people can instantly upload photos of others without any permission or notification.


  • #95
    BabysCoffee
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,713 ✭✭✭BabysCoffee


    lulu1 wrote: »
    Anyone who would post pics of a couples wedding on face book when they were requested not too would be a very ignorant person and should not call themselves a friend of either the bride or the groom.

    It could be considered ignorant to think you have the right to be the boss of your guests and their actions and put directives on your invitation.


  • #96
    Princess Peach
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,698 ✭✭✭✭Princess Peach


    BabysCoffee wrote: »
    It could be considered ignorant to think you have the right to be the boss of your guests and their actions and put directives on your invitation.

    I just don't see why it's a big deal.

    Things like "black tie dress code" and wedding gift registries, or weddings in far away locations can affect a guest's experience. Not sharing photos of the hosts makes them happy, and inconveniences nobody.

    Already they are getting judged on just the wording of their invites people wonder why they don't want every aspect of their day viewed by strangers!


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  • #97
    BabysCoffee
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,713 ✭✭✭BabysCoffee


    I know I'd regret putting this "regulation" on my invitation (in 20 years I would be cringing). Unnecessary IMO.

    Just spread the word with a few key people that you don't want pics on Facebook. Job done.

    No need for tacky pronouncements on the invitation to what is meant to be a classy affair I presume.


  • #98
    December2012
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,695 ✭✭✭December2012


    I think the people who would complain about a request like this are the type of people who complain about weddings.


  • #99
    mrsbyrne
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,228 ✭✭✭mrsbyrne


    December2012 wrote: »
    I think the people who would complain about a request like this are the type of people who complain about weddings.

    I'm the worlds no. 1 wedding hater but this wouldn't bother me. I could find 50 other things I hate about your wedding but this wouldn't be one of them.


  • #100
    ronjo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,941 ✭✭✭ronjo


    amdublin wrote: »

    Well I think people were worse for nodding. I am sorry, but I would respect their wishes and not post anything (I couldn't be bothered with the confrontation) but I would RESENT that they asked me.

    You would genuinely resent someone for asking you not to post their picture on social media??

    Wow, you are very easily annoyed.


  • #101
    BabysCoffee
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,713 ✭✭✭BabysCoffee


    lulu1 wrote: »
    Anyone who would post pics of a couples wedding on face book when they were requested not too would be a very ignorant person and should not call themselves a friend of either the bride or the groom.

    The issue here is what way the request is made. No one is saying that they would post pics after being asked not to do it.

    I think the following ways are better to get your feelings about social media out:
    1. Mention it to a few key people and ask them to spread the word - particularly those that you feel will be the ones who will do the posting
    2. Ask the best man to say it to all present before the ceremony begins
    3. Say it to all attending hen and stag
    You get the idea!

    But don't put it on your invitation!! It's so tacky imo. And you'll regret it in 20 yrs when you look back at your invite. It will look so petty and it will also instantly date your wedding.

    I think it is just not classy to be putting silly rules on your invitation. And I think it does smack of "Princess Bride". As someone said above - Get over yourself!!


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  • #102
    meeeeh
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,612 ✭✭✭✭meeeeh


    amdublin wrote: »
    Depends.

    If it was because she was completely hammered I wouldn't need to be asked I just wouldn't do it.
    If she wasn't hammered but was obviously having a good old time knocking back a few drinks but I (as her friend) was aware that she didn't like pics of her drinking on social media (for her job etc) I'd would not post.*

    (*Personally my rule is: if I wouldn't walk in on a Monday and slap the photo of myself up on a noticeboard on work then I shouldn't post it of myself on fb i.e. a pic of myself posing with a fun cocktail is fine, me with a load of shots fine, me "a little under the weather" carrying a traffic cone along, not fine)

    If she asked me not to post because "I want to look at them properly tomorrow" before they go up or "I want to see them first" or "I want to show them to my aunt moira/boyfriend/sister first"
    I'd be like (a) get over yourself it's going up or (b) I wouldn't put it up and would be thinking "get over yourself" and yes resent it.

    Edit.
    I'd never post a pic of my friend that was "bad"....either drunk bad or not attractive bad....as much as is humanly possible!!!!
    That is very selfish attitude. People have different reasons why they don't want photo's in public domain and yet you are unable to respect that and post some other photo. If a friend posted pictures of me against my wishes I wouldn't consider them a friend. It means they are too preoccupied with themselves to consider my wishes.

    Btw Who looks at invitations twenty years later?


  • #103
    ronjo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,941 ✭✭✭ronjo


    meeeeh wrote: »
    Btw Who looks at invitations twenty years later?

    So I am not the only one that finds it strange that this gets mentioned over and over and over again :)


  • #104
    BabysCoffee
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,713 ✭✭✭BabysCoffee


    ronjo wrote: »
    So I am not the only one that finds it strange that this gets mentioned over and over and over again :)

    Did you not keep your invite???

    Who never looks at their wedding invites when they look at their wedding video and photos?

    I have my invite in my wedding album.....and I'd hate to have some tacky bossy directive on it :D


  • #105
    ronjo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,941 ✭✭✭ronjo


    BabysCoffee wrote: »
    Did you not keep your invite???

    Who never looks at their wedding invites when they look at their wedding video and photos?

    I have my invite in my wedding album.....and I'd hate to have some tacky bossy directive on it :D

    It might be in the album but I dont really know to be honest.


  • #106
    shewasdiesel
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 138 ✭✭shewasdiesel


    ronjo wrote: »
    You would genuinely resent someone for asking you not to post their picture on social media??

    Wow, you are very easily annoyed.

    Apparently, they don't like people telling them what to do, where to sit, what to eat, what to wear etc. I think they would be best to do the honest thing and stay at home.


  • #107
    amdublin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,653 ✭✭✭✭amdublin


    shewasdiesel wrote: »
    Apparently, they don't like people telling them what to do, where to sit, what to eat, what to wear etc. I think they would be best to do the honest thing and stay at home.

    ??

    Is this directed at me? Because i never said that.

    Yes i don't like being told what images i can or can't post on the Internet.


  • #108
    rainbowtrout
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,535 ✭✭✭✭rainbowtrout


    amdublin wrote: »
    ??

    Is this directed at me? Because i never said that.

    Yes i don't like being told what images i can or can't post on the Internet.



    So your right to post pictures on the internet supercedes the right of a couple to want to maintain their privacy on their wedding day or anyone else for that matter.

    Wow. That's an amazing sense of entitlement.


  • #109
    amdublin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,653 ✭✭✭✭amdublin


    rainbowtrout wrote: »
    So your right to post pictures on the internet supercedes the right of a couple to want to maintain their privacy on their wedding day or anyone else for that matter.

    Wow. That's an amazing sense of entitlement.

    What is privacy?

    Once a wedding pic is not on fb it means a wedding is private??


  • #110
    rainbowtrout
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,535 ✭✭✭✭rainbowtrout


    amdublin wrote: »
    What is privacy?

    Once a wedding pic is not on fb it means a wedding is private??

    It's private in the sense that it's an invitation only event, that the general public are not invited to.

    You are applying what you feel are acceptable boundaries for uploading photos to the internet to everyone you know, and if they don't fall in with your view you label them as precious. Yet at the same time you wouldn't want pictures of you up online downing shots, and obviously drunk. Another person might find that totally acceptable and put them up and call you precious.

    Some people do not want their lives in the public domain, yet you're basically say 'screw you, I don't care that you value your privacy because I'm reserving to right to ride roughshod all over your privacy so I can post your pictures online'. Not a very nice trait in a wedding guest for presumably people you would like and like you enough to invite you.


  • #111
    shewasdiesel
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 138 ✭✭shewasdiesel


    amdublin wrote: »
    ??

    Is this directed at me? Because i never said that.

    Yes i don't like being told what images i can or can't post on the Internet.

    No one can "stop you" doing what you want to other people, happy now ?

    So if your friends ask you not to post a picture of them on facebook, you go ahead anyway ?
    Admit it, your're not really their friend behind their back are you ?


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  • #112
    amdublin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,653 ✭✭✭✭amdublin


    rainbowtrout wrote: »
    It's private in the sense that it's an invitation only event, that the general public are not invited to.

    You are applying what you feel are acceptable boundaries for uploading photos to the internet to everyone you know, and if they don't fall in with your view you label them as precious. Yet at the same time you wouldn't want pictures of you up online downing shots, and obviously drunk. Another person might find that totally acceptable and put them up and call you precious.

    Some people do not want their lives in the public domain, yet you're basically say 'screw you, I don't care that you value your privacy because I'm reserving to right to ride roughshod all over your privacy so I can post your pictures online'. Not a very nice trait in a wedding guest for presumably people you would like and like you enough to invite you.

    nope. I've repeatedly said if requested not to post, I wouldn't post. But inside my head I'd be saying get a grip would you.

    P's. Not really a.nice trait in a host to be establishing a load of can't do's - doesn't really make for the most convivial of hosts does it.


  • #113
    shewasdiesel
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 138 ✭✭shewasdiesel


    amdublin wrote: »
    nope. I've repeatedly said if requested not to post, I wouldn't post. But inside my head I'd be saying get a grip would you.

    So if you asked your friend not to post pictures of you on social media for whatever reason, it would be ok for them to whine behind your back and pretend to be your friend would it ?


  • #114
    shewasdiesel
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 138 ✭✭shewasdiesel


    amdublin wrote: »
    P's. Not really a.nice trait in a host to be establishing a load of can't do's - doesn't really make for the most convivial of hosts does it.

    must be a real bummer for you all the things you can't do at someone's wedding. Strange mentality.


  • #115
    amdublin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,653 ✭✭✭✭amdublin


    shewasdiesel wrote: »
    must be a real bummer for you all the things you can't do at someone's wedding. Strange mentality.

    Yes it's very annoying when someone goes out of their way to make their guests annoyed and uncomfortable at a party they are hosting. It is a strange mentality.

    At parties I host I go out of my way to make my guests feel welcomed and "at home". I tend not to impinge "rules" on them like children. But may
    be that's just me.


  • #116
    mrsbyrne
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,228 ✭✭✭mrsbyrne


    Peeps. Lighten up! Some people think this request is princessy and precious and tacky, some think ,like me, its perfectly understandable and not a biggie anyway. C'est la vie.
    I think doves and chocolate fountains and ice sculptures and ice cream carts are pretentious and common and an offensive waste of money and some people think these things are delightful and gasp in awe and admiration as if the bride carved the sculpture herself.
    The important thing is that its the b&g big day and either you've had(like me) your big day or there's a chance that you may have one in the future. So respect that and avoid any possibility of your opinion casting any kind of a shadow on their 15 minutes of fame.


  • #117
    shewasdiesel
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 138 ✭✭shewasdiesel


    amdublin wrote: »
    Yes it's very annoying when someone goes out of their way to make their guests annoyed and uncomfortable at a party they are hosting. It is a strange mentality.

    At parties I host I go out of my way to make my guests feel welcomed and "at home". I tend not to impinge "rules" on them like children. But may
    be that's just me.

    So if you asked your friend not to post pictures of you on social media for whatever reason, it would be ok for them to whine behind your back and pretend to be your friend would it ?


  • #118
    CaraMay
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 4,652 ✭✭✭CaraMay


    amdublin wrote: »
    What is privacy?

    Once a wedding pic is not on fb it means a wedding is private??

    It's at a level of privacy that the bride & groom as happy with and given it's their day, you should respect that.

    My sister in law lives her life out on Facebook and once my son was born I asked her not to post photos of him on Facebook as I don't agree with it. She had no issue and respected my request. It's the same thing.


  • #119
    homerjay2005
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29,346 ✭✭✭✭homerjay2005


    i think its very rude of a person to put this on a wedding invite , especially since the woman in question is a facebook addict as the poster has specified.

    probably just wants to post them herself and get more likes than anybody else which is sad.


  • #120
    shewasdiesel
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 138 ✭✭shewasdiesel


    CaraMay wrote: »
    It's at a level of privacy that the bride & groom as happy with and given it's their day, you should respect that.

    My sister in law lives her life out on Facebook and once my son was born I asked her not to post photos of him on Facebook as I don't agree with it. She had no issue and respected my request. It's the same thing.

    " Waaaahhhh ! You can't impinge rules on your sister and tell her what to do"


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  • #121
    irishguy1983
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,389 ✭✭✭irishguy1983


    mrsbyrne wrote: »
    Peeps. Lighten up! Some people think this request is princessy and precious and tacky, some think ,like me, its perfectly understandable and not a biggie anyway. C'est la vie.
    I think doves and chocolate fountains and ice sculptures and ice cream carts are pretentious and common and an offensive waste of money and some people think these things are delightful and gasp in awe and admiration as if the bride carved the sculpture herself.
    The important thing is that its the b&g big day and either you've had(like me) your big day or there's a chance that you may have one in the future. So respect that and avoid any possibility of your opinion casting any kind of a shadow on their 15 minutes of fame.

    I agree and see both sides of the coin.

    At my wedding I don't want any photos on FB, Twitter, etc. and will be making similar request - not sure how I word it though.

    I am more of the opinion tis tacky for people who put up photos of wedding, etc. Then again that's just the way it seems to be going....


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