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Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,884 ✭✭✭Eve_Dublin


    EMF2010 wrote: »
    My own personal feedback would be that while I think the mods do an excellent job, I do think sometimes there could be a bit more scope given to humour on the forum. I don't think that every topic must be a 'serious' one but that might just be me.

    I'd second this. I think all the mods genuinely do a really fantastic job but on occasion, humour can be discounted a little too easily as being more suited to AH. I think sometimes some of the topics could do with a joke or two to lighten the mood unless very obviously offensive. I'm sometimes afraid of saying something a bit more light-hearted in the more serious threads but I feel sometimes that's exactly what those kinds of threads need sometimes; we have (sometimes very) different opinions on contentious issues but we can get along on otherwise. You know what I mean?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,390 ✭✭✭The Big Red Button


    I've very little "real" feedback, tbh.

    As someone who reads more than posts these days (mostly due to lack of time!), I have to admit that, for a while there, I felt that the modding may have been a little inconsistent (and sure that can happen - ye're not robots, like, we all get that, and we all appreciate that you're all very generously giving up your free time to moderate this forum!) Anyways that was only my own personal observation, and I haven't noticed this is a while now, I guess it was just a result of all the changes in the mod team. Welcome to the new mods, by the way!! :)

    One random little thing I'd like to suggest is to not allow pictures in the chat thread? I mean, obviously allow links to them. But I for one am not interested in pictures of kitties or cake (I get that I'm in the minority there), and they take forever to load on the phone, makes it very difficult to scroll through a thread. In my opinion it would be better if people just posted links to pics, like in AH, instead of posting the pics themselves.

    As regard the parenting thing - I'm not a mother, but I definitely think that it's normal that parenting discussions would feature in a woman's forum, as being a mother (or wanting to be a mother) is such a large part of so many womens' lives. I guess, the way I'd see it is this - if the thread could just as easily relate to a father/guardian as to a mother, it belongs in the Parenting forum. If it's female-specific (or leaning that way), why not discuss it here - those who aren't interested can ignore it. E.g. a thread about the best type of baby formula to use would obviously belong in Parenting. Whereas, for example, the social issues which sometimes arise regarding breast-feeding obviously usually affect mothers moreso than fathers, and therefore I think it would be fine to discuss it here.

    Obviously there are so many grey areas, and it all comes down to mod discretion. But like, even just looking at a couple of threads on the first page. The "cast spells" thread could go to R&R. The "quirks" thread could go to AH. The C25K thread could go to A/R/T. The "stressed out" thread could go to Work and Jobs ... etc!

    But it would be pointless to move all those threads. If we were going to be that uptight about having stricly ladies issues only discussed here, it would get pretty boring, and we'd have very few threads left!!

    I don't see how it could be justified, to allow (e.g.) a C25K thread in a ladies' forum, but not to allow threads about being a mother. :confused: I mean, I have no real interest in parenting issues - but I wouldn't like to see that sort of discussion being forbidden, either. If posters want to discuss it, let them at it - if I don't want to read it, I'll ignore the threads/posts.
    panda100 wrote: »
    I think on the whole TLL is a wicked forum, and is without a doubt my favourite on boards. I would just mention one thing though. I find that many quite good new threads get pushed down off the first page never to be commented on or seen again. The' Loungers on the run', 'things you'd like to say to to your boyfriend' and 'who makes you drool' threads tend to clog up the first page. I find sometimes TLL looks likes its stuck in a time warp with these three same threads appearing. If they get so much traffic, shouldn't they be sticked?

    But what would be the point of stickying them?

    I know that, when I'm browsing Boards on my phone using the touch site, it's extremely annoying when there are a load of stickied threads in a forum. On some forums, the entire first page is taken up with stickies, and there are only 2-3 "fresh" threads at the bottom of the page.

    I definitely wouldn't be in favour if stickying them, anyways. Personally I don't really read those threads, and it would mean that they'd be taking up room on the first page all the time. Anyways, in general, I think it makes sense to sticky as few threads as possible. The more popular threads will always naturally be up near the top anyways.

    That's my own opinion, I dunno, it's quite possible that others feel differently. :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29,089 ✭✭✭✭LizT


    If you sticky the most popular threads, they'll always be on the first page anyway :confused:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 17,485 ✭✭✭✭Ickle Magoo


    Eve_Dublin wrote: »
    I'd second this. I think all the mods genuinely do a really fantastic job but on occasion, humour can be discounted a little too easily as being more suited to AH.

    I think that's both a really good and an interesting point to get a more detailed discussion/consensus on.

    [On a side-note for a fair while now we have tried to make a deliberate point of avoiding the whole "get into AH with that" type comments because it's not fair on AH to infer they're the pit of all things inappropriate for other forums...and from a poster's perspective I love AH and all it's light-hearted, tongue-in-cheek irreverence. Some posts are more suitable in other forums tho - and that forum isn't necessarily AH.]

    From a mod perspective in a forum that had to be set up in part due to the "humour" of others and given one posters belly-laugh is another posters inane drivel, it's a little more tricky. Should it be okay for posters to parachute into a serious discussion with a one-liner? What if numerous posters report said post as disrupting or belittling their discussion? Is it okay for regulars to throw in one-liners or treat the topic with irreverence but not those who've spotted the thread on their front page and decided to drop by without reading the charter? Where is the line drawn?
    LizT wrote: »
    If you sticky the most popular threads, they'll always be on the first page anyway :confused:

    Yep - it also means they don't fall off the front page and die organically when not being posted in.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 4,701 ✭✭✭Ectoplasm


    From a mod perspective in a forum that had to be set up in part due to the "humour" of others and given one posters belly-laugh is another posters inane drivel, it's a little more tricky. Should it be okay for posters to parachute into a serious discussion with a one-liner? What if numerous posters report said post as disrupting or belittling their discussion? Is it okay for regulars to throw in one-liners or treat the topic with irreverence but not those who've spotted the thread on their front page and decided to drop by without reading the charter? Where is the line drawn?

    As I brought up the humour thing in my post too, I was trying to think a bit more about this as I know it could be problematic. There were a couple of reasons I brought it up. First, I see a lot of regular posters here being funny elsewhere and I just think it's a shame they can't really bring that element of themselves to tLL.

    The other reason was some threads getting locked quickly because of humour. It's times like this I wish I'd a better memory because I know on a few occassions there have been threads which have been quite funny, but also contained a bit of discussion, that were locked pretty quickly - and I know that disappointed me.

    I don't think that posters should be able to, as you said, parachute in with a one liner, but, if a poster discusses the topic at hand and adds a joke to lighten the mood, I don't think that'd be a problem. Tis a tricky one though; as you said, humour is subjective. Wow I don't envy mods their jobs :p

    If I was to sum up my thinking it would be maybe we could try a bit of a 'loosen the reins' on humour/funny posts? If it results in lots of reported posts/ridiculous amount of mod work then clearly it's a non-runner, but it mightn't hurt to try?

    All this is just how I feel, and maybe other more active posters are looking at this screaming 'Nnnooooo', so some further input is definitely necessary!


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 17,485 ✭✭✭✭Ickle Magoo


    EMF2010 wrote: »
    ...I know on a few occassions there have been threads which have been quite funny, but also contained a bit of discussion, that were locked pretty quickly - and I know that disappointed me.

    I just wanted to highlight the above. There can be a myriad of reasons why a thread is locked - and very few of them are set in stone. If you are disappointed/frustrated/annoyed that a thread has been locked then please feel free to PM the/a mod and ask for clarification on why that was/ask that it be re-opened. It's a fine line to walk between having an open forum for general discussion/irreverence and maintain the very special ethos tLL has and host threads relevant to that so there's absolutely no harm in questioning whether we were the right side of that line in a specific case. :cool:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    I just wanted to highlight the above. There can be a myriad of reasons why a thread is locked - and very few of them are set in stone. If you are disappointed/frustrated/annoyed that a thread has been locked then please feel free to PM the/a mod and ask for clarification on why that was/ask that it be re-opened. It's a fine line to walk between having an open forum for general discussion/irreverence and maintain the very special ethos tLL has and host threads relevant to that so there's absolutely no harm in questioning whether we were the right side of that line in a specific case. :cool:

    Would it not make more sense to remove the offending posts and allow those of us taking the topic seriously to continue doing so?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 17,485 ✭✭✭✭Ickle Magoo


    Not if you are one of those posters who think less serious posts should be allowed to stand in serious threads... :)

    There are lots of possible solutions, that's why we're throwing it out there. What makes sense/works best for the forum is very subjective - tho I would say to my knowledge serious & constructive discussion threads do not just get locked merely because a couple of jokes/jokey posts have been thrown in...


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators Posts: 9,721 Mod ✭✭✭✭Twee.


    Just a note on adding stickies: Forums are advised to limit stickies as it messes up the Touch or smartphone version of the site. There is a banner type add after four or so threads, so if they're all stickies you don't see anything new immediately, and the number of threads per page is small enough, so with too many stickies you may not get any new threads on the first page.

    How are we going to decide what qualifies as an event? Limit it to non-commercial stuff, allow charity and political events? Should there be a minimum post count to be able to add an event to stop one post wonders?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,327 ✭✭✭Madam_X


    LizT wrote: »
    I'd agree in a way that the off topic thread is cliquey but I don't think it's intentional.
    Definitely not. That's the way these things naturally are - it's not some sort of deliberate strategy/conspiracy, and it should be accepted and respected that there will already be an established dynamic. Sticking around and getting involved is the one way a person will feel less like an outsider.


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  • Moderators, Business & Finance Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 51,685 Mod ✭✭✭✭Stheno


    Madam_X wrote: »
    Definitely not. That's the way these things naturally are - it's not some sort of deliberate strategy/conspiracy, and it should be accepted and respected that there will already be an established dynamic. Sticking around and getting involved is the one way a person will feel less like an outsider.

    I agree with this, I hop in and out of the "How's life" thread as I think of it, and to be honest, I probably ignore 90% of it, and use it to whinge, talk about a good day, give out about how cold it is or whatever.

    I probably don't even post there more than two or three days a week, but the support and thanks, and little posts mean a lot when I do post there, and sometimes just reading it, you get to know goings on in peoples lives, also posters there respect your privacy, what you want to talk about is fine, but it's rare people pry, it can be a great sounding board.

    On the subject of the forum overall, I used to mod this forum, and it was when the forum went through one of the "all women are mad, lets a subset of male posters go wild and cause chaos". I grew to hate this forum, and boards, and saw it as a real chore to log on and deal with mod discussions on how to deal with conflicts, making mod decisions (the mod team here were fantastic, couldn't ask for a more supportive group), getting involved in discussions and invariably getting tagged with the "you're a mod, and abusing your power" mantra etc.

    So I stopped being a mod.

    Probably the best thing I ever did.

    I use boards now more than I did, I've enormous respect for anyone who mods any forum on boards, but I enjoy it as a user, and as a forum overall to learn about new stuff, to give advice/perspectives, and to just generally distract myself.

    And you know, I post in Tll more than I did before I was a mod, and when I was a mod.

    I have strong views on a lot of things, and do challenge views in the motherhood threads, but I hope not in a "motherhood is bad" I do question if it's the be all and end all, I don't like how the thread about the tv3 ad ended.

    I ignore a lot of threads here if I'm honest and tend to vere towards the more serious threads, and have a bit of debate if I get riled up about a subject.

    I think one of the nicest things about this and many fora is getting a post thanked by someone with an opposing view, sign of a good debate where you proved your point without denigrating another.

    I think the current mod team do a fantastic job.

    Now on a couple of points.

    1. If there is to be an events thread, the ethos around what is to be included has to consider the reason behind TLL private, aside from that, I'm fine with it.

    2. On the subject of humor, I've a very black sense of humor, which does not go down well in black and white and I'd never engage it here, I actually sometimes don't get the humor on here in the chat thread, and get anxious about it.

    I'd prefer not to have humour such as AH type humour in this forum

    On the whole though I enjoy this forum, the users, and the moderating style.

    TL:DR Events thread supporting the ethos of TLL private, humor no.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,143 ✭✭✭Thumby


    Ok i know i'm not a regular poster in tLL but figured i'd throw in my 2cents anyway. Have to say i've found it very welcoming and friendly. I haven't come across the "cliquieness" thats been mentioned, now in saying i just haven't had a chance to read the chat thread. Which doesn't necessarily mean its like that either way. I think alot of it is just down to perception, the same with the mother v non mother thing. In general i think its a great forum and for the most part one of the less "argumentitive" forums shall we say. I may not post in here alot but i do read it more.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,931 ✭✭✭Ilyana


    Novella wrote: »
    I used to be a regular poster in this forum but I found myself posting less and less. I'm not sure if it's just me and if it is, that's completely fine, but I guess I felt that a lot of threads descended into bitchy little arguments and I often felt frustrated by it so I simply posted elsewhere.

    I've seen that happen a lot too. There is a fine line between expressing your opinion or asking somebody you disagree with to clarify their position, and just being downright condescending or judgmental. Sometimes people think they're just being 'straight talking', but the tone of their post can make the recipient feel attacked. On the other hand, people should try not to be too sensitive. Respond to the points raised, and not so much the tone. There's a report function for that, so the thread doesn't get bogged down in sniping.

    As for the humour thing, I see no harm in allowing a joke here and there, once it's not offensive and the bulk of the post is on-topic. It'd be a sad day if posters couldn't offer a bit of brevity to certain threads (within reason).

    Overall, I really like tLL. I'm a regular poster in the chat thread and, on the whole, it's a welcoming little community - whether you're a newbie or returning from a hiatus. I know some posters find the forum cliquey, but the only way to definitively be excluded from somewhere is to never try participate.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,020 ✭✭✭Ah_Yeah


    Just my 2 cents on the feedback about the chat thread being cliquey.

    The chat thread to me is like a workplace. Everyone who has been there a while has got to know each other, they sit with each other at lunch, share jokes and chat. When you start your first day on the job you know no one. Can you say that they are "cliquey" and you feel unwelcome just because you don't get their jokes?

    The off topic thread posters are the most compassionate and welcoming bunch I have ever encountered. I took a break from Boards not too long ago, and when I returned I actually found a lot of posters had been enquiring about me and if I was ok :) Any time a newbie comes into the forum to say hello, they always get a big giant welcome from everyone and are told to join immediately. No one goes unacknowledged, and I like that I can pop in and out with random posts without trying to catch up.

    I think everyone who posts in tLL are absolutely lovely, although I will agree with other posters' views on the tone of the threads. By far I think the best word to describe some views on threads would be "defensive".

    With regard to the smut, it is all innuendos, which is definitely up my street, but may not be for all. Just like with parenting threads and relationship threads, I'm single and don't want children, but I'm not opposed to those topics being discussed. We are all unique, with our own unique interests and opinions, and I think that everyone's interests and opinions should be valued as contributions to our forum. We shouldn't be turning against each other.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,772 ✭✭✭✭Whispered


    I don't post here often, so I hope ye don't mind if I reply here too.
    Madam_X wrote: »
    Definitely not. That's the way these things naturally are - it's not some sort of deliberate strategy/conspiracy, and it should be accepted and respected that there will already be an established dynamic. Sticking around and getting involved is the one way a person will feel less like an outsider.
    As a new-ish poster to TLL I can 100% verify that. I'm finding it hard to keep up and there are some references that I don't get, but that is hardly anybodies fault. If I stick around I'm sure I'll catch up eventually. It's lovely to see what appears to be genuine friendships!

    Everyone seems to be very friendly and nice. Although, I must say that a while ago I started to read and post in TLL and I left fairly quickly. There was a cliqueness and bitchy tone that was too much. This doesn't seem to be here at all now and it genuinely reads like a bunch of people who get along, can disagree, agree and chat. I think that's lovely.

    I have not got any real opinion on what threads etc because I'm just not here long enough, but wanted to give my perspective from a more outside pov.
    Ah_Yeah wrote: »
    With regard to the smut, it is all innuendos, which is definitely up my street,
    heh heh


  • Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 15,772 Mod ✭✭✭✭dfx-


    I've been a poster in tLL since it was just an apple in Jules' eye and have to agree with some posters comments on the humour point and particularly the trend towards being super serious as the forum has grown.

    Every thread seems to be serious, I've glanced at the first two pages of the forum and see no light hearted topics (possibly the odd quirks thread) and don't necessarily remember the last light hearted thread. It's a definite change that has been requested in previous feedback and to agglomerate the chat threads that permeated the forum in the past.

    I think ultimately that festers with strong opinions and serious opinions only being allowed with no release valve for the tension created. Every serious conversation in a pub for example should be broken by a cheer for a broken plate or glass. Perhaps this results in the penchant for people taking offence (and leaving or taking a break from the forum/thread/boards/closing their account, especially in the chat thread) or the reported sniping in this thread.

    I don't read any of the politics fora, but this is the most super serious forum I visit and I include the tribalism of Soccer in that. The chat thread - far from being cliquey - is an oasis in that regard I think.

    Another thing I notice from time to time is a lot of the first page is taken up by a phenomenal number of moved threads. Is the high number because of people not getting what the forum is about or the forum not being flexible enough to talk about a wider variety of topics?


  • Moderators, Business & Finance Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 51,685 Mod ✭✭✭✭Stheno


    dfx- wrote: »
    I've been a poster in tLL since it was just an apple in Jules' eye and have to agree with some posters comments on the humour point and particularly the trend towards being super serious as the forum has grown.

    Every thread seems to be serious, I've glanced at the first two pages of the forum and see no light hearted topics (possibly the odd quirks thread) and don't necessarily remember the last light hearted thread. It's a definite change that has been requested in previous feedback and to agglomerate the chat threads that permeated the forum in the past.

    I think ultimately that festers with strong opinions and serious opinions only being allowed with no release valve for the tension created. Every serious conversation in a pub for example should be broken by a cheer for a broken plate or glass. Perhaps this results in the penchant for people taking offence (and leaving or taking a break from the forum/thread/boards/closing their account, especially in the chat thread) or the reported sniping in this thread.

    I don't read any of the politics fora, but this is the most super serious forum I visit and I include the tribalism of Soccer in that. The chat thread - far from being cliquey - is an oasis in that regard I think.

    Another thing I notice from time to time is a lot of the first page is taken up by a phenomenal number of moved threads. Is the high number because of people not getting what the forum is about or the forum not being flexible enough to talk about a wider variety of topics?


    Moved threads are usually either fashion and appearance, gifts, or personal issues, and believe me, when I modded on here, half my time was moving threads :) You have to leave a link for the OP, as there doesn't seem to be a way around that.

    We've almost completely opposite views of TLL here, I post mainly here, motors, work and jobs, and politics, and use the chat thread here to talk about my day, catch up on what people are doing, I do the same in motors, but I'd not consider TLL a serious forum compared to those others, so I'd guess it's the mix of fora you frequent? I've a few sports forums in my favourites and man are they strict!

    The subjects here tend to come in waves, I suspect it does come across as more serious than it is as the chat thread covers so much stuff as does the ladygardening thread?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 17,485 ✭✭✭✭Ickle Magoo


    dfx- wrote: »
    I don't read any of the politics fora, but this is the most super serious forum I visit and I include the tribalism of Soccer in that. The chat thread - far from being cliquey - is an oasis in that regard I think.

    And yet the chat thread certainly generates it's fair share of reported posts with regards to bitchiness and posters feeling picked on and put upon - and given some of those reports and complaints about it we've had - it is viewed by a number of posters as being cliquey and at times, downright unpleasant...it's the age old issue of personal perceptions and nothing pleasing everyone all of the time, I think.

    Other than moving threads to forums that were set up to specifically deal with those queries, threads aren't locked for being too frivolous or light-hearted, so if posters want more light-hearted threads then posters who want them need to start posting them.

    Out-with what posters are choosing to post threads on, "more humour" is such a hugely general/non-specific statement in terms of the role of moderation, could I ask you to take a look at my earlier post which threw out some questions on how you think that should work and perhaps elaborate?

    Cheers you. :)

    ETA

    Sorry, I meant to answer your question too.
    dfx- wrote: »
    Another thing I notice from time to time is a lot of the first page is taken up by a phenomenal number of moved threads. Is the high number because of people not getting what the forum is about or the forum not being flexible enough to talk about a wider variety of topics?

    If you follow the moved threads - they are not discussion topics; they are requesting advice with boyfriend issue, wanting ideas for gifts for a girlfriend, query on fashion or beauty product, male wishing to know women's view on short men because he can't find a hook-up, even consumer complaints about broadband and topics which I think posters just post in the first forum they come across, etc, etc.

    I think it's almost certainly a case that posters do not read the charter and just see "ladies lounge" and assume anything from/to/regarding ladies is good to go. I'm not sure how to get around that, unless we ignore that Boards has a PI forum, a fashion and beauty forum, a consumer complaints forum, a gift and festivities forum, etc, etc and let all posts stand?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,404 ✭✭✭✭Pembily


    The chat thread was closed 2 years ago as it was cliquey et al, then a new one was created as the emotion thread turned into a chat thread. I haven't posted much here lately but used to a lot and the chat thread was a lot more cliquey then, I find it very welcoming now. You can't please all of the people all of the time.

    As with other forums I post in, if I don't have an interest in a topic I won't post.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,921 ✭✭✭✭hdowney


    I just want to say that I haven't had any trouble in the chat thread, the people in it have been more than welcoming :)


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,605 ✭✭✭OakeyDokey


    I used to be quite regular poster in here but due to my schedule it's hard to post much but I still look in and read threads daily.

    I've never had one problem with any thread that has been posted in TLL, to be honest I welcome all posts. I'm not one to browse the Political, Fitness or Parenting forum so posts on all topics can be of interest to me. I started C25K because of the thread posted in TLL and I'm glad the thread is there and you have the support of other ladies to help you along which is more comfortable to me. I don't start many threads in TLL but after hearing about the way some users are about certain threads such as the Parenting/Children threads I'd find myself reluctant to start up a thread in case it annoys users or get the label 'It's been done to death' like I've heard some people say.

    The forum is a place for women to post topics from a women perspective I understand that some threads can be more suited to another forum but that's why they're mods here, I trust the mods decision to move threads to appropriate forum when needed but other than that I don't mind. If I'm not interested in something I'll pass over it but I would never go onto the thread and give out about it.

    There are a number of regular posters in the Chat thread and yes it does feel cliquey but I don't think that's a bad thing I never really had a problem with anyone in TLL not anyone of the regular ladies anyway. That's pretty much what's in my head and I hope I haven't offended anyone.

    A noticeboard for events is a great idea :D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,399 ✭✭✭KamiKazeKitten


    I drop in and out of the chat thread. not because I think it's cliquey or anything but because the posting is so fast it's hard to keep up with! :D They're a lovely bunch of posters there imo, yes there is an established vibe and some injokes but that's only natural, sure the tGC feedback said the same thing about the Guinness and Rollies thread. So I don't think it's really an issue.

    I haven't had a problem with one thread posted here - if you don't like it don't read it, after all!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,965 ✭✭✭SarahBeep!


    Chat Thread: I HATE the word 'clique'. Of course if you're posting in a long standing thread where people have posted a lot previously you're going to feel like an 'outsider', you are an 'outsider/newbie/whatever' but unless you say hello and introduce yourself you'll never get to know people! It's not like you'd be interrupting, I wouldnt post anything here I didn't want a reply to!

    Other Threads: Some are serious and they raise a lot of thought for me that may not have come to my attention otherwise I'll think twice about walking home late at night now. I know a lot more about the side effects of certain contraceptives. etc etc..

    Now the parenting issue. You're always gonna come across the crazy pushy parents who think they and their little darlings are entitled to the earth..... You're always gonna come across the crazy childless people who think they are entitled to the earth. In the non-chat threads there are (what I would consider random posters, simply because I don't see them in the chat thread) random posters who come in and throw around inflammatory statements and get in arguments with other randomers who I've never seen on ANY tLL Thread. But this happens all over boards.

    People can't say that because I dont wanna come in here and the only posts I see are 'Well I as a mother think....blah blah blah' that I hate children.

    I love hearing about what people's kids get up to because it's hilarious (Not looking at anyone specifically here Lucyfur.... :P ) and it's so exciting hearing how someone's pregnancy develops but I also love it when Lia Lia posts pictures of her dog because he has the best facial expression EVER.
    Every poster here I recognise (I won't say now, coz that's a little creepy in my books :P) I recognise by something different be it their style, sense of humour, desire for divilment etc

    I think we all need to dial back out attitudes and up our tolerance at times (yes, this DOES include me!!)

    This is by far my favourite place on boards....don't let the drama llamas ruin it please...


    Oh! And the smut!!

    Sure if you dont wanna read it dont read it. When a group of adults are together, the topic of conversation wont always be PG.
    It's the internet like, us making banana jokes is hardly the smuttiest thing you'll find!


  • Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 15,772 Mod ✭✭✭✭dfx-


    Stheno wrote: »
    The subjects here tend to come in waves, I suspect it does come across as more serious than it is as the chat thread covers so much stuff as does the ladygardening thread?

    I've learned to stay well away from this particular thread :eek: :)
    Out-with what posters are choosing to post threads on, "more humour" is such a hugely general/non-specific statement in terms of the role of moderation, could I ask you to take a look at my earlier post which threw out some questions on how you think that should work and perhaps elaborate?

    I notice reading the charter that it doesn't say that the moderator has discretion to apply the rules. Could implementation of discretion or adding it to the charter resolve this problem - allowing the moderator to interpret the rules based on the flow of the thread, the reaction of posters, the length of the exchange etc., and referring to the expressed mention in the charter should any issues arise?

    This could allow for a grey area. Rather than two options of very serious or closed/moved.
    I think it's almost certainly a case that posters do not read the charter and just see "ladies lounge" and assume anything from/to/regarding ladies is good to go. I'm not sure how to get around that, unless we ignore that Boards has a PI forum, a fashion and beauty forum, a consumer complaints forum, a gift and festivities forum, etc, etc and let all posts stand?

    I don't necessarily disagree, moreso thinking/typing aloud. Again could discretion allow some of them? Does the forum want some of them...maybe not. As mentioned before, previous feedback was to agglomerate the chat into one thread and remove those topics, so it might well be what the forum still wants.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,189 ✭✭✭Ophiopogon


    I'm not sure if I have much to add to the feedback as everything I think has been pretty much covered.

    I had thought the modding was becoming a bit heavy handed a while ago but that seems to have settled down.

    I would also like to see a bit more humour in the serious threads as I think it may help calm down some of the debate. Sometimes IMO a thread becomes useless due to the stubbornness of some posters, I don't really post in these threads anymore as they annoy me so much. I think if people were able to lighten the mood a bit then the discussion could keep moving. I can't think of the thread now but there was one where a regular poster who was contributing to the thread made a joke and was asked not to by a mod. I think as long as you are contributing to the thread then a bit of joking should be allowed, don't really want to see one liner AH style response.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 17,485 ✭✭✭✭Ickle Magoo


    dfx- wrote: »
    I notice reading the charter that it doesn't say that the moderator has discretion to apply the rules.

    There is the line at the foot of the charter stating:
    We appreciate from time to time things will come up that are not dealt with by the charter. This is not an absolute hard and fast list of the Laws. We reserve the right to revoke access for bad behaviour that is not currently covered by the charter.

    I appreciate the suggestion that moderators interpret the rules based on the flow of the thread but that's pretty much what happens now/we react to reported posts...and some posters aren't happy with the status quo so I was wondering what exactly posters want to be able to stand in a serious thread - and hear whether other posters agree with that.

    It's the enormous grey areas that are hardest to moderate in this forum - at what point does a discussion from a female perspective cross into being a general discussion - at what point does humour become inappropriate and put posters off/set an unwelcome precedent that posters come to tLL to get away from. Is it fair/can we justify that one poster can treat the thread/topic with irreverence and we let that go and yet if another poster comes in and does something very similar they'll be actioned?

    The trouble with rules is they have to apply to everyone and while I agree with the general premise, I don't think implementing an "X jokes are fine as long as "these" posters/posters already posting in the thread say them while Y aren't, especially if said by anyone else" policy is at all practical - so it would really need to be more of a general irreverance to topics/perspectives is good to go...and that always generates reported posts from those who get annoyed posters are being sarcastic/bitchy/belittling/snide/sniggering at the discussion they've been having/perspective they've just given as well as attracting the usual coterie of sea-gullers....you see the dilemma? :D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,949 ✭✭✭✭IvyTheTerrible


    I like the Ladies Lounge as it is now. The chat thread keeps me going! :)
    It may seem cliquey to a newcomer/lurker, but that's normal in any group where people get to know each other. I do think posters are very welcoming of newcomers.

    Now I have noticed some bitchiness/narky remarks directed to other posters. I've never reported it because it's not strictly personal abuse. But I do wish some people would listen to what other posters have said, and ignore threads or posters who post things that don't interest them rather than getting the dig in. TBH, it's the only thing that damages the atmosphere around here.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,263 ✭✭✭Gongoozler


    I agree that most threads in tLL get very serious, I would like to see a lighter atmosphere in here, but then, I'm not sure that's down to moderation, maybe it's just the way the users of the forum see the topics. I think humour should be 'allowed' in threads, but I suppose if it's by a regular contributor you could more easily determine that it's not just belittling the topic. I dunno really.

    Regarding the personal snipes, I'm sure a few saw a while back that I commented on this on the chat thread, and it wasn't well received. I absolutely wasn't trying to give out, I was moreso pointing out (for those who didn't realise) that some people would be made very uncomfortable by it. I received some emails about it, saying thank you for saying it, and confirming that yes it was making some people feel uncomfortable.

    Some might call it sensitive, but well, sensitivity to things like that is a difficult thing to change. I just feel bad for the posters that are affected by it.

    But since, I've found everyone making an effort to be more tolerant, and keep 'negative opinions' to a minimum. It's really nice to see that.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,073 ✭✭✭sam34


    SarahBeep! wrote: »
    Chat Thread: I HATE the word clique ...

    In the non-chat threads there are (what I would consider random posters, simply because I don't see them in the chat thread) random posters who come in and throw around inflammatory statements and get in arguments with other randomers who I've never seen on any thread


    it's hilarious, yet rather sad, that you jump to defend the chat thread from accusations of being a clique yet then go on to dismiss some posters as "randomers" simply because they dont post on the chat thread.

    I have found that my posting rate on boards has dropped in the last yr or so, across all fora, not just tll. I think that's a personal thing, related to life circumstances, rather than an issue with any forum.

    the chat thread- I find it can be a bit hard to infiltrate, tbh I preferred when it was a "what made you smile/sad" thread, but I am probably biased in that I don't check it too often so am always out of date with it.

    I tend to lurk here more than I post, and I've been trying to think why that might be. it's not a dislike for certain threads, I just avoid those that are of no interest to me,eg the couch to 5k thread.., have never ventured near that. I read a lot of the motherhood threads, and the longterm relationship ones. I think in general I'm less likely to post if I think someone's gonna aggressively jump
    down my throat about something I've said- I just no longer have the interest or energy for one-up-manship.

    TL;DR- no issue with modding. chat thread is a bit exclusive. ignore threads that are of no interest to you.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 35,954 ✭✭✭✭Larianne


    sam34 wrote: »
    the chat thread- I find it can be a bit hard to infiltrate, tbh I preferred when it was a "what made you smile/sad" thread

    Same as.
    sam34 wrote: »
    I think in general I'm less likely to post if I think someone's gonna aggressively jump
    down my throat about something I've said
    - I just no longer have the interest or energy for one-up-manship.

    Which I feel is the main reason I hardly ever post on threads in this forum any more. If you disagree with a poster, you may have a bunch of posters gang up on you, the word 'bitchy' is usually used or an attitude problem is bandied about. It is like if you don't conform with the regular posters ideas and opinions, you are being bítchy or shít stirring. I have no problem with someone disagreeing with me, but the tone of some posters posts can be quite aggressive.

    I wouldn't particularly like seeing an events thread, mainly because it would have to be a sticky I guess and there's already enough of them on the forum. I would also be afraid it would turn into agenda pushing thread by some posters and I've have to scroll through crap to find one or two occasional events that would interest me. Maybe if each post had a bold headline in it so you knew straight away what the event was you could easily skim read the thread??

    I think, in general, the mods are very fair with their actions.


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