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Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 15,238 ✭✭✭✭Diabhal Beag


    A distressed Man United fan

    Connecting to server...

    Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

    Stranger: did you see my mom

    Stranger: i cant find my mom anywhere

    You: I would joke but she is probably dead

    Stranger: Oh

    You: Want a hug

    Stranger: Are you a pedo?

    You: No

    Stranger: my mom say

    Stranger: to me NEVER

    Stranger: talk with strangers

    You: She also had a speech impediment

    Stranger: if you arent can you help me?

    Stranger: ronaldo brilha mto no curitchaaaaaaaaa

    You: Ronaldo is over-rated

    Your conversational partner has disconnected.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 58 ✭✭tagheuer


    Stranger: 안녕

    You: What the hell was that?


    Your conversational partner has disconnected.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,294 ✭✭✭rainbowdrop


    Connecting to server...
    Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
    Stranger: Hi.
    You: hey
    Stranger: Do you care if I jack off?
    You: no.... go on.... need a hand?
    Stranger: Yes.
    Stranger: Are you a guy or girl?
    You: girl
    Stranger: Nice.
    Stranger: Wanna see my cock?
    You: il imagine it
    Stranger: http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=snotpz&s=3
    You: haha.... tinypic..... sounds about right
    Stranger: Go to that link.
    You: no..... i'm lesbian.... it'l burn my eyes!!
    Your conversational partner has disconnected.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,190 ✭✭✭wolfric


    Connecting to server...

    Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

    You: fire or water

    Stranger: hi

    Stranger: twilight

    You: FAIL

    You have disconnected.
    Connecting to server...
    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
    Stranger: hi
    You: you like dinosaurs?
    Stranger: from
    You: BLASTOFF!!!
    You: eeeerrummm POW
    You: i like dinosaurs....
    You: you wana be my friend?
    Your conversational partner has disconnected
    LOL


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,054 ✭✭✭Carsinian Thau


    I just had someone spend over two and a half hours talking to me about a personal problem I'm having at the moment. It was actually very helpful.

    I really love this site!


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 76 ✭✭paul larry


    Stranger: heey

    Stranger: from ?

    You: hey#

    You: n.irland

    You: you?

    Stranger: Brazil

    You: m/f

    Stranger: f

    Stranger: u ?

    You: m

    Stranger: age ?

    You: do you all have brazilians down there

    You: lol

    You: 26

    Your conversational partner has disconnected.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,158 ✭✭✭donmeister


    Connecting to server...
    Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
    Stranger: Ever wonder if the red lego blocks are different tasting to the blue one's?
    You: hello
    You: asl
    You: need sex
    You: lol
    Stranger: We are both males, I guarantee it.
    You: ugh
    Stranger: it's the internet dude ..
    You: you're 98% right
    Stranger: Ahh, you're mexican?
    You: no im from peru
    You: i like lima beans
    Stranger: Explains the 2% defficiency
    You: so,crazy weather lately yeah!?
    Stranger: Yeah, you hear about barrack obama?
    Stranger: turn's out ... he's black ..
    You: and part irish
    You: wtf
    Stranger: So it is written ..
    Stranger: Can you leave the convo so i can summarise this and then post it on /b/ now?
    You: no
    You: i am a cyborg
    Stranger: Kind've harsh, isn't it melvin?
    Stranger: I wanna watch tremors the series now .. Thank god for torrenting yaaay
    You: manufacteured to create the most brillant conversation ever
    You: tremors?
    You: the series?
    Stranger: Yeah man
    Stranger: Yeah
    You: like the film?
    You: ish
    Stranger: The film is epic
    You: yes
    You: I was scared ****less by it as a child
    Stranger: Not many people think so, but it's just awesome
    Stranger: Same haha
    You: the dead man under the hat
    Stranger: Didn't properly get over the fear till I was 12, true story
    You: ****ed up
    Stranger: I would sketch out sometimes when drunk too and think ****KKK
    Stranger: I was 6 when tremors came out, I watched it ...
    Stranger: ****ed me up mannn
    You: same as,erm,i think!?
    You: lol
    You: i cant even do to the shop now
    You: im a total recluse in my attic because of that film!
    You: *may not be true
    Stranger: Maybe, it's fate that we met?
    Stranger: Maybe ... We should have sex and spawn a love child that which will enclose the fate of the world in 2012 and take place as the new leader of hell.
    Stranger: and call him "Old fred"
    You: i like call me
    You: just shout out your window
    You: 'I LOVE CHILD PORN'
    Stranger: Ok, brb one second
    You: then i'll know where you live lol
    You: no,wait!
    You: i was joking!
    Stranger: wait ... I actually did shout it ...
    Stranger: It's 4:50 am .. Like i give a damn
    You: oh ****
    You: where in the same time zone
    You: so you're either from the uk ireland or portugal
    You: lmao
    Stranger: Wales.
    You: very good
    You: im from ireland
    Stranger: south wales, bridgend, 1 llantwit way, cf36 4de - my full name is Thomas john.
    You: lmao
    Stranger: Now, May i have your bank account details and sort code?
    You: ...............is this george akidutigwengo?
    Stranger: HOLY SHEEET *legs it*
    Stranger: brb man, going for a piss
    You: i can read minds
    Stranger: now what am i thinking?!
    You: you're thinking,I wonder if there is anything we can relate to given our close proximity of counties that we live in
    Stranger: Actually I was thinking of doing an all nighter and going to get a cuppa tea ...
    You: **** it,close enuf!?
    You: lol
    You: all nighters are very bad for you're health
    Stranger: I've done 4 in the past week.
    Stranger: I don't like sleep ..
    You: sleep if for the weak
    You: well
    You: I go to bed at like 4-5 every night but sleep in till 2-3 the next day
    Stranger: Sleep is for the weak so we will never sleep
    You: I hate being unemployed :(
    Stranger: No we will never rest until ****ing death
    Stranger: Just fresh outta sixth form ..
    Stranger: uni is approaching fast ,... =/
    You: when you going? september?
    You: same as
    You: cant wait to get back bored ****less
    Stranger: Yeah sep, what one you go too?
    Stranger: and what you taking?
    You: :) < thats the name of the college
    You: its pretty hard to pronounce lol
    Stranger: ahh fair enough haha
    Stranger: Im taking law with politics :D
    Stranger: in aberyswtyth :)
    You: oh god?! law.........fook that
    You: lol
    Stranger: One of us has to try and legalise weed, you won't so it's up to me ...
    You: ive been in prison for 13 days before
    Stranger: I once raped a prison guard, with a dog.
    You: yeah? and apparently its illegal to have sex with a DEAD cat
    You: i say different
    Stranger: WTF
    You: will you change the cat sex laws in wales and I can move over?
    Stranger: I call that 'friday night express' and ofcourse I will, just for you.
    You: merci :)
    You: let me know how you get on
    You: visit my website and post on the forum www.irishpervshavingsexwithdeadcats.ie
    You: thanks
    Stranger: Will do melvin, will do
    You: thanks daryll,you da man! BLACK POWER!
    Stranger: CARAMEL COLOUR!
    Stranger: Anyways man, it's been great talking to you .. but im gonna go have sme food :0
    You: for some odd reason im trying to picture you in my head and all I can think of is gavin henson ????
    You: lmao
    Stranger: Haha, close enough ;)
    You: okay you;re hungry
    Stranger: He's a cousin of mine.
    You: i wont keep ya!
    Stranger: We just call him "Stikky the retard"
    You: lol
    Stranger: Okies, take care and gl with life man


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 383 ✭✭Scrambled egg


    Connecting to server...
    Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

    Stranger: Please excuse this very unusual litmus test. Are you a female who enjoys the idea of being scolded and punished?

    You: |_______|_____________\__________|______|
    |_______`._____________|_________|_______:
    .\________|____________|_________\|_______|
    _\_______|_/_________/__\\\___--___\\_______:
    __\______\/_____--~~__________~--__|_\_____|
    ___\______\_-~___________________~-_\____|
    ____\______\_________.
    .________\|___|
    ______\_____\______//_________(_(__>__\___|
    _______\___.__C____)_.you just_(_(____>__|__/
    _______/\_|___C_____)/__lost_\_(_____>__|_/
    ______/_/\|___C_____)___the__|__(___>___/__\
    _____|___(___C_____)\_game_/__//___/_/_____\
    _____|____\__|_____\\_________//__(__/______|
    ____|_\____\____)___`----___--'______________|
    ____|__\______________\_______/__________/_|
    ____|_____________/____|_____|__\___________|
    ____|____________|____./______\___\__________|_
    ___|____________/____..|_______|___\__________|
    ___|___________/_____..\___/\___/_____|_________|
    ___|__________/________|____|_______|_________|
    __|__________|_________|____|_______|_________|

    Your conversational partner has disconnected.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,054 ✭✭✭Carsinian Thau


    Connecting to server...
    Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
    Stranger: hi
    You: ___________________░▒▓▓▓▓▒░_______________________ _________________________________
    ________________░▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒░____________________ _________________________
    ______________▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓____________________________________________
    _____________▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░______________________________░▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒_________
    ____________▒▓▒▒▓▓▓░░░░░░░░▒▓▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒░____▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▒_______
    ____________▓▓▒▒▓▓░░░░░░▒▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▓▓______
    ____________▓▓▒▒▓▓░░░▒▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓░░░░░░░░▒▓▒_____
    ____________▒▓▒▒▒▓▓▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒░░░░░░░▓▒_____
    _____________▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓░░░░░▒▓______
    ______________▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒░░▒▓░______
    ______________░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▓________
    _____________░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒_________
    ____________░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒_________
    ____________▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░________
    ___________▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▒________
    ___________▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓________
    __________▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓________
    __________▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▓░_______
    _________░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░░░░░▒▒▒░▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░_______
    _________▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒░░░░░░░▒▓▓▓▓▓▒░░░░▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░_______
    ________▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒░░░░░░░░▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒░░░░░▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒_______
    _______▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░░░░░░░░░░▓▓▓▓▓▓▒░░░░░░░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓_______
    _____░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒░░░░░░░░░▒▓▓▒░░░░░░░░▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░______
    ____░▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒░░░▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓______
    ___▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▒▓▓░░░░░░░░▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓_____
    ___░░░▒▓▓▒▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▓▓░░░░░░░░▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓____
    ______▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▓▓░░░░░░░▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▒▒▓▓________
    _____░▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▓▓▒░░░░▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▓▓▓▓▒▓▓░________
    ______░▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▒▓▓▓▓▓▓░_______
    ______▒▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▓▓▓▓▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░_____
    ____░▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓____
    ___░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░__
    ___▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒_
    __▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░
    _░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓__▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓
    _▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓_____▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓
    ░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓___░▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░
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    ______░▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒________________________
    ______░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░_________________________
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    _______▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓___________________________
    _______▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░__________________________
    _______▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓__________________________
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    _______▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒______▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒_________________________
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    ______▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓░___________▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓_________________________
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    _____________________________________________▒▓▓▓▒____▓▓░▓▒________________
    ______________________________________________ ░▒▒▒▒▒▓░░__________________

    OMG! IT'S PEDOBEAR! RUN, PLEASE RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!
    ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
    HE'S RAPING ME!
    Stranger: f or m?
    Stranger: **** the bear
    You: i'm being raped by pedobear, why do you care if i'm m or f?
    You: are you a pedo too?
    Stranger: no, i'm not a peido
    You: but you are illiterate?
    Stranger: yeah
    You: well, at least you're honest. i admire that.
    Stranger: engineer student, and you?
    You: medical student.
    Stranger: f/m?
    You: PEDOBEAR IS BACK!
    ___________________░▒▓▓▓▓▒░_______________________ _________________________________
    ________________░▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒░____________________ _________________________
    ______________▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓____________________________________________
    _____________▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░______________________________░▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒_________
    ____________▒▓▒▒▓▓▓░░░░░░░░▒▓▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒░____▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▒_______
    ____________▓▓▒▒▓▓░░░░░░▒▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▓▓______
    ____________▓▓▒▒▓▓░░░▒▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓░░░░░░░░▒▓▒_____
    ____________▒▓▒▒▒▓▓▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒░░░░░░░▓▒_____
    _____________▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓░░░░░▒▓______
    ______________▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒░░▒▓░______
    ______________░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▓________
    _____________░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒_________
    ____________░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒_________
    ____________▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░________
    ___________▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▒________
    ___________▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓________
    __________▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓________
    __________▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▓░_______
    _________░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░░░░░▒▒▒░▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░_______
    _________▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒░░░░░░░▒▓▓▓▓▓▒░░░░▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░_______
    ________▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒░░░░░░░░▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒░░░░░▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒_______
    _______▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░░░░░░░░░░▓▓▓▓▓▓▒░░░░░░░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓_______
    _____░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒░░░░░░░░░▒▓▓▒░░░░░░░░▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░______
    ____░▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒░░░▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓______
    ___▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▒▓▓░░░░░░░░▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓_____
    ___░░░▒▓▓▒▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▓▓░░░░░░░░▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓____
    ______▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▓▓░░░░░░░▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▒▒▓▓________
    _____░▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▓▓▒░░░░▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▓▓▓▓▒▓▓░________
    ______░▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▒▓▓▓▓▓▓░_______
    ______▒▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▓▓▓▓▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░_____
    ____░▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓____
    ___░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░__
    ___▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒_
    __▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░
    _░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓__▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓
    _▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓_____▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓
    ░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓___░▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░
    ▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒__▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░_
    ▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓__▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒___
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    _▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓____▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▒░_______
    _░▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░____________________
    __░▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░_____________________
    ____▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░______________________
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    ______░▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒________________________
    ______░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░_________________________
    ______░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░__________________________
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    _______▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒____▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓__________________________
    _______▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒______▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒_________________________
    ______░▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓________░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓_________________________
    ______▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓░___________▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓_________________________
    ______▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒______________░▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒________________________
    _____▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░_________________░▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓________________________
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    _____░▒_▒_▒_▒____________________░▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒░________________________
    __________________________________▒▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒______________________
    ___________________________________░▒▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒░___________________
    ______________________________________░▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░_________________
    _________________________________________▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒________________
    __________________________________________▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▓░_______________
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    ___________________________________________░▓▓▓▒▓▓▒░░░▓░_▒▓▒_______________
    _____________________________________________▒▓▓▓▒____▓▓░▓▒________________
    ______________________________________________ ░▒▒▒▒▒▓░░__________________
    You: OH! THE PAIN!
    Stranger: kkkkkkkkkk
    You: THE PAIN!
    You: I WANT TO DIE!
    Stranger: you smoke mary???
    You: now that would be telling ;)
    Stranger: kkkkkkkkkkk
    Stranger: country?
    You: ireland.
    You: you?
    Stranger: brasil
    You: does pedobear ever visit your country?
    Stranger: no
    You: you're lucky.
    Stranger: first time
    You: very vewry lucky.
    Stranger: kkkkkkkkkkkkkk
    Stranger: but, we have the violence...
    You: pedobear is violent enough for us. we don't need any more...
    Stranger: send it to us
    Stranger: what is your age?
    You: 20. not old enough for pedobear yet. :(
    You: you?
    Stranger: 24
    You: pedobear would still like to have his way with you. we shouldn't send him until we can be sure you're safe.
    Stranger: then you are a girl afraid of bears?
    You: everyone is afraid of pedobear! he lives all genders!
    Stranger: ok, you are gay...
    You: no, i'm not gay.
    You: pedobear kinda is.
    You: why do you think i'm gay?
    Stranger: hermaphrodite?
    You: no.
    You: i'm just afraid of pedobear.
    Stranger: because you do not reveal their gender
    You: like everyone else in ireland
    You: but you didn't ask for my gender!
    Stranger: "You: f/m?"
    You: what has that got to do with gender?! do you want to know my gender or not?
    Stranger: yes
    You: then why are you talking about my f/m?
    Stranger: kkkkkkkkkkkk
    Stranger: you are funny...but is gay
    You: i'm not gay. i just don't understand why you want to ask questions about my radio.
    Stranger: do not worry, I have no bias
    You: no biad about radios? i should hope not.
    Stranger: because I wanted to know if you are woman
    You: how does that link back to radios? you're confusing me.
    Your conversational partner has disconnected.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 383 ✭✭Scrambled egg


    Connecting to server...
    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

    Stranger: hello
    Stranger: how does the light shine upon thee?
    Stranger: or in normal words
    Stranger: how u doing?
    You: like this

    You: |_______|_____________\__________|______|
    |_______`._____________|_________|_______:
    .\________|____________|_________\|_______|
    _\_______|_/_________/__\\\___--___\\_______:
    __\______\/_____--~~__________~--__|_\_____|
    ___\______\_-~___________________~-_\____|
    ____\______\_________.
    .________\|___|
    ______\_____\______//_________(_(__>__\___|
    _______\___.__C____)_.you just_(_(____>__|__/
    _______/\_|___C_____)/__lost_\_(_____>__|_/
    ______/_/\|___C_____)___the__|__(___>___/__\
    _____|___(___C_____)\_game_/__//___/_/_____\
    _____|____\__|_____\\_________//__(__/______|
    ____|_\____\____)___`----___--'______________|
    ____|__\______________\_______/__________/_|
    ____|_____________/____|_____|__\___________|
    ____|____________|____./______\___\__________|_
    ___|____________/____..|_______|___\__________|
    ___|___________/_____..\___/\___/_____|_________|
    ___|__________/________|____|_______|_________|
    __|__________|_________|____|_______|_________

    Your conversational partner has disconnected.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,148 ✭✭✭✭KnifeWRENCH


    You know, when you get past the pisstakes and the horny teens, there are actually some pretty cool people out there! :)
    Like Phil from Connecticut, Ron from Alabama, the Portuguese med student (whose name I never found out) and this girl who appreciates physics jokes!

    Connecting to server...
    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

    Stranger: Answer any of the following questions! Favorite baseball team? Favorite physics joke? Favorite opera? Go!
    You: Werner Heisenberg is stopped by a traffic cop. "Sir, do you know how fast you were going back there?" Heisenberg replies: "No, but I know where I am."
    Stranger: love it!
    Stranger: good choice in questions, and definite 10 on the answer
    You: Thank you. I aim to please! :)
    Stranger: So how are you on this fine night (if it is night for you)?
    You: It's just gone 4am for me and I'm bored as ****.
    Stranger: Where are you that's it's 4? London time?
    You: Right time zone. I'm actually in Ireland
    You: What about yout good self?
    You: *youR good self, even?
    Stranger: Eastern standard in the US
    Stranger: Did you just google physics jokes or did you have that one prepared?
    You: Lol, no I heard it from a friend of mine before. I'm actually a Physics student! :)
    You: Well....Physics and Maths.
    Stranger: You might be my favorite person on the internet right now
    Stranger: I don't study a hard science, but I love reading about it. Physics and math jokes are always fantastic
    You: Many people have made that claim. :D
    Stranger: Are you in University then?
    You: Lol, yeah. Going into my 3rd year in September
    You: And Physics and maths jokes are ****in' awesome! :D
    You: Have you heard the joke about e^x?
    Stranger: I have not!
    Stranger: do tell!
    You: e^x walks into a bar. He sits at the bar on his own and orders a drink. There are a load of other functions (sines, cosines, Gaussians etc.) sitting in a corner, talking and laughing merrily to themselves. The barman gives him his drink and says "Why are you alone? Why aren't you having fun with the other functions?"
    You: e^x replies: "I tried to integrate but nothing happened."
    You: BA DUM TISH! :D
    Stranger: love the sound effects!
    You: that's probably my favourite maths joke! :)
    You: you got any good ones?
    Stranger: hmm good ones
    You: or bad ones that are so excruciatingly bad that they actually become awesome! :D
    Stranger: hah! i'm glad I have that option
    Stranger: let me think
    You: ....and how long shall you be thinking? I have other places to go and be awesome, y'know. :D
    Stranger: oh goodness! i must try to capture your attention as well as you had captured mine
    You: Impossible, my friend but try anyway.....
    Stranger: I guess one of my favorites is let me be your integral so I can be the area under your curves, but I don't know how well that works for me, as I'm a girl with no interest in curves
    Stranger: but feel free to use it at the bar if you're a guy. You might get lucky?
    You: The version of that I'm used to is "I wish I was your derivative so I could lay tangent to your curves" But your one works too! :)
    Stranger: Is it too creepy to ask what university you're in in Ireland? I think I only know a handful
    You: Cork
    Stranger: Though while I was living in Paris I met some dubliners who did not have as many kind words to say about the area
    You: Pfft, Dubliners. They're just jealous of Cork! ;)
    Stranger: heh
    You: Sorry, I gotta go. Nice talking to you though. :) Nice to know someone here appreciates physics and maths rather than the usual "OMG Im horny. **** me now through my magic computer!" :D:D
    You: Bye
    You: o/
    Stranger: haha good luck in university!
    Stranger: use nerdy pick up lines at the bars
    Stranger: it'll get through to someone eventually!
    You: oh i will. with shockingly low success rate.
    You: :D

    You have disconnected.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,230 ✭✭✭ironictoaster


    A wtf moment.
    3431 users online
    Connecting to server...
    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
    You: ___________________░▒▓▓▓▓▒░_______________________ _________________________________
    ________________░▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒░____________________ _________________________
    ______________▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓____________________________________________
    _____________▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░______________________________░▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒_________
    ____________▒▓▒▒▓▓▓░░░░░░░░▒▓▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒░____▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▒_______
    ____________▓▓▒▒▓▓░░░░░░▒▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▓▓______
    ____________▓▓▒▒▓▓░░░▒▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓░░░░░░░░▒▓▒_____
    ____________▒▓▒▒▒▓▓▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒░░░░░░░▓▒_____
    _____________▓▓▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓░░░░░▒▓______
    ______________▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒░░▒▓░______
    ______________░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▓________
    _____________░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒_________
    ____________░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒_________
    ____________▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░________
    ___________▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▒________
    ___________▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓________
    __________▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓________
    __________▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▓░_______
    _________░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░░░░░▒▒▒░▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░_______
    _________▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒░░░░░░░▒▓▓▓▓▓▒░░░░▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░_______
    ________▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒░░░░░░░░▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒░░░░░▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒_______
    _______▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓░░░░░░░░░░▓▓▓▓▓▓▒░░░░░░░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓_______
    _____░▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒░░░░░░░░░▒▓▓▒░░░░░░░░▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓░______
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    Stranger: hey
    Stranger: thats the ****
    Stranger: right there nigga
    Stranger: ****
    You: he's called pedobear
    You: google it
    Stranger: nice nigga
    Stranger: ****
    You: I'm very white....
    Stranger: yo so was up
    Stranger: so im black gotto prob
    You: I was just wondering why I was being refered as nigga thats all..
    Stranger: oh ight i get craker
    Stranger: so ill call you a craker
    Stranger: better
    You: oh yes, us damn whiteboys
    Stranger: my grand dad was always killing whites
    Stranger: but my baby girl is white i aint gonna let him kill her
    You: Oh yeah I remember the annual whiteboy bashing, fun times
    You: You're girlfriend?
    You: Your*
    Stranger: yea so im dating a white
    Stranger: so
    Stranger: craka u gotta prob
    You: Did I say I did?
    Stranger: naw i just got a bowner
    Stranger: ****
    You: bowner?
    You: WTF?
    Stranger: yea its harder than my mamas pork chops


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 18,300 ✭✭✭✭Seaneh


    Connecting to server...
    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
    Stranger: hey you
    You: hey you too!
    You: I hate U2....
    Stranger: excuse me
    Stranger: the band?
    You: I don;t hate You Too, I don't knwo you.... Yeah, I hate U2, the band.
    Stranger: oh
    Stranger: do you like sex
    Stranger: i see
    You: er, sure, who doesnt?
    Stranger: what about with em
    Stranger: me?
    You: Er, I dunno... I have no idea of your sex, age, physical apparence, personality.
    Stranger: well want to cyber
    You: what is this, yahoo chat circa 1998?
    Stranger: what are you like 79
    You: quick question? do you have stairs in your house?
    Stranger: yes
    You: hmm....
    You: do you year a bra habbitually or recreationally?
    Stranger: habitually
    You: and does your anatomy require such?
    Stranger: yes
    Stranger: very much so
    You: and what demographic would you fit into?
    Stranger: white
    You: so caucasian female... ok we have a foundation for a discussion
    You: caucasian male here. north western european continental shelf.
    Stranger: nice
    Stranger: age?
    You: 25
    Stranger: 23
    You: geographic proximity?
    Stranger: usa
    You: (no idea why im typing like that tbh)
    You: so you're a 23 year old white girl from the US who is awake at 1 am trawling omegle for dudes?
    Stranger: haha
    Stranger: what are you doign
    Stranger: on omegle
    Stranger: yes
    You: i couldnt sleep so just decided to chat to randomers
    You: im in Ireland by the way
    Stranger: oh so no cybering?
    Stranger: oh sweeet
    You: its pretty **** really
    You: im on the west coast, and its really wet and windy the last week
    You: so august feels like fecking march
    You: not fun
    Stranger: do you want to cyber or no
    Stranger: i really just want to get off
    You: er, i dont know what you look like.
    Stranger: it doesn't matter
    You: but like, im ubber hot... i cant cyber with someone who looks like glen quagmiure...
    You: we could trade pics?
    Stranger: you narcisstic asshole
    Your conversational partner has disconnected.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 18,300 ✭✭✭✭Seaneh


    You know, when you get past the pisstakes and the horny teens, there are actually some pretty cool people out there! :)
    Like Phil from Connecticut, Ron from Alabama, the Portuguese med student (whose name I never found out) and this girl who appreciates physics jokes!

    Connecting to server...
    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

    Stranger: Answer any of the following questions! Favorite baseball team? Favorite physics joke? Favorite opera? Go!
    You: Werner Heisenberg is stopped by a traffic cop. "Sir, do you know how fast you were going back there?" Heisenberg replies: "No, but I know where I am."
    Stranger: love it!
    Stranger: good choice in questions, and definite 10 on the answer
    You: Thank you. I aim to please! :)
    Stranger: So how are you on this fine night (if it is night for you)?
    You: It's just gone 4am for me and I'm bored as ****.
    Stranger: Where are you that's it's 4? London time?
    You: Right time zone. I'm actually in Ireland
    You: What about yout good self?
    You: *youR good self, even?
    Stranger: Eastern standard in the US
    Stranger: Did you just google physics jokes or did you have that one prepared?
    You: Lol, no I heard it from a friend of mine before. I'm actually a Physics student! :)
    You: Well....Physics and Maths.
    Stranger: You might be my favorite person on the internet right now
    Stranger: I don't study a hard science, but I love reading about it. Physics and math jokes are always fantastic
    You: Many people have made that claim. :D
    Stranger: Are you in University then?
    You: Lol, yeah. Going into my 3rd year in September
    You: And Physics and maths jokes are ****in' awesome! :D
    You: Have you heard the joke about e^x?
    Stranger: I have not!
    Stranger: do tell!
    You: e^x walks into a bar. He sits at the bar on his own and orders a drink. There are a load of other functions (sines, cosines, Gaussians etc.) sitting in a corner, talking and laughing merrily to themselves. The barman gives him his drink and says "Why are you alone? Why aren't you having fun with the other functions?"
    You: e^x replies: "I tried to integrate but nothing happened."
    You: BA DUM TISH! :D
    Stranger: love the sound effects!
    You: that's probably my favourite maths joke! :)
    You: you got any good ones?
    Stranger: hmm good ones
    You: or bad ones that are so excruciatingly bad that they actually become awesome! :D
    Stranger: hah! i'm glad I have that option
    Stranger: let me think
    You: ....and how long shall you be thinking? I have other places to go and be awesome, y'know. :D
    Stranger: oh goodness! i must try to capture your attention as well as you had captured mine
    You: Impossible, my friend but try anyway.....
    Stranger: I guess one of my favorites is let me be your integral so I can be the area under your curves, but I don't know how well that works for me, as I'm a girl with no interest in curves
    Stranger: but feel free to use it at the bar if you're a guy. You might get lucky?
    You: The version of that I'm used to is "I wish I was your derivative so I could lay tangent to your curves" But your one works too! :)
    Stranger: Is it too creepy to ask what university you're in in Ireland? I think I only know a handful
    You: Cork
    Stranger: Though while I was living in Paris I met some dubliners who did not have as many kind words to say about the area
    You: Pfft, Dubliners. They're just jealous of Cork! ;)
    Stranger: heh
    You: Sorry, I gotta go. Nice talking to you though. :) Nice to know someone here appreciates physics and maths rather than the usual "OMG Im horny. **** me now through my magic computer!" :D:D
    You: Bye
    You: o/
    Stranger: haha good luck in university!
    Stranger: use nerdy pick up lines at the bars
    Stranger: it'll get through to someone eventually!
    You: oh i will. with shockingly low success rate.
    You: :D

    You have disconnected.



    I just had the nicest chat with a really cool girl called Nicola from LA, she was hilarious!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,022 ✭✭✭GhostInTheRuins


    Connecting to server...
    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

    Stranger: hello x
    You: Hey!
    Stranger: how are you ?
    You: I'm not bad at all thanks, yourself?
    Stranger: im okay. bored though
    You: I see
    You: I can tell you a joke if that'll cheer you up?
    Stranger: yes please :)
    You: knock knock
    Stranger: whos there ?
    You: disco
    Stranger: disco who ?
    You: disconnected
    You have disconnected.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,293 ✭✭✭Simply Red


    Connecting to server...
    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
    Stranger: I'm insecure about the size of my penis. just lookin for an honest opinion, i have a pic.
    You: that would be an ecumenical matter
    Stranger: uh.
    Stranger: no its not
    You: are you sure?
    Stranger: what does organized religion have to do with my dick?
    You: eh, eh *runs*
    You have disconnected.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,117 ✭✭✭Gazza22


    My first conversation on this site. Not funny, more twisted than anything else

    Stranger: heyy
    You: This is a strange funny wite lol, i just came across it
    You: site*
    Stranger: u think that ur my frnd
    Stranger: joking with me
    Stranger: u dnt know who i am
    Stranger: crazy asshole
    You: lol
    You: I'm far from your friend
    Stranger: ill rape u
    You: You sound a bit ****d up to be honest
    Stranger: i rape little girls
    Stranger: ill rape u
    You: Sitting here on the internet, with your twisted words. Most likely sad and alone with little to no real life past the keyboard
    You: Have a good day
    Your conversational partner has disconnected.

    :rolleyes:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,371 ✭✭✭Irishpimpdude


    Stranger: hi
    You: Hey sexy
    Stranger: ı am male
    Stranger: you?
    You: Me too duh
    Your conversational partner has disconnected.
    :rolleyes:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 383 ✭✭Scrambled egg


    Connecting to server...
    Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

    Stranger: British?

    You: no thank god

    Your conversational partner has disconnected.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 606 ✭✭✭captainspeckle


    Connecting to server...

    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

    You: yoir mother is a hamster and your father smells of elderberries

    Stranger: why

    You: because he does not love me like he used to

    Stranger: sounds fair

    You: it would be if i werent your sister

    Stranger: dunno what u r talking about

    You: dont you really? on another note, do you like cake?

    Stranger: no

    You: me neither, we should be together, we cam look past the whole sibling thing

    Stranger: what do u want

    You: what do you want, more to the point?

    Stranger: want nth

    You: oh rite.

    Stranger: so what do u want

    You: some prawn crackers would be nice

    Stranger: cool

    You: yes it is.

    You: you are really boring, good bye!

    You have disconnected.

    this person was no fun!:(


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,190 ✭✭✭wolfric


    Connecting to server...

    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

    You: yoir mother is a hamster and your father smells of elderberries

    Stranger: why

    You: because he does not love me like he used to

    Stranger: sounds fair

    You: it would be if i werent your sister

    Stranger: dunno what u r talking about

    You: dont you really? on another note, do you like cake?

    Stranger: no

    You: me neither, we should be together, we cam look past the whole sibling thing

    Stranger: what do u want

    You: what do you want, more to the point?

    Stranger: want nth

    You: oh rite.

    Stranger: so what do u want

    You: some prawn crackers would be nice

    Stranger: cool

    You: yes it is.

    You: you are really boring, good bye!

    You have disconnected.

    this person was no fun!:(

    .........Are you on crack?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,378 ✭✭✭Borneo Fnctn


    You: how'ya keepin'?
    Stranger: im keeping
    Stranger: yourself?
    You: not great.
    Stranger: oh dear
    Stranger: whys that?
    You: My only human quality to speak of is a fondness for Celtic mysticism.
    Stranger: the only?
    You: You know the artistes. The likes of Enya and Clannad. You like them artistes? Course you do.
    Stranger: not so much
    Stranger: i think they are a little boring
    You: It's the only thing that keeps me from exploding.
    Stranger: thats interesting. i like movies.
    You: I've gotta be a tough nut for my job. This is the only thing I can relate to.
    You: I was involved in making a film recently but it never got aired.
    Stranger: oh thats too bad
    You: It was a documentary actually. "On the Streets with Jerry Lynch". I'm a city detective in Dublin.
    Stranger: thats really interesting. so were you interviewed?
    Stranger: i work in movies, i guess
    You: Yeah I was followed around for a while. I was just showing what I do on a day to day basis.
    Stranger: yeah, sadly documentaries arent particularly marketable
    Stranger: which, working in development, im learning that marketing is kind of everything
    You: This one was considered too gritty. Too coarse. I said to them take it or leave it.
    Stranger: ahh
    You: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iGntt08OXzc
    You: That's a clip
    Stranger: im at work. unfortunately, i cant watch anything with sound
    You: fair enough. Take it easy pal. Gotta go.
    Stranger: goodbye
    Stranger: good luck
    You have disconnected.
    or save this log or send us feedback.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 20,759 ✭✭✭✭dlofnep


    I can't believe it, the first person I spoke Irish with could speak it! Chances of that happening?
    You: Oh!! An mhaith
    You: Sin aisteach, nach bhfuil?
    Stranger: Cen fath a bhfuil tu ar Omegle?
    Stranger: An-aisteach ar fad!
    You: Chonaic mé thread ar boards.ie
    Stranger: Oh shea
    You: Agus tusa?
    Stranger: Chuala me faoi e o mo chairde, agus de bharr sin, taim anseo
    Stranger: Aon sceal?
    You: ah ceart go leor.
    You: Nah, níl scéal ar bith agam.. Sa leaba, fliú orm.. Táim briste
    Stranger: Ah, go hufasach! Fliu na muice no cad e?
    You: ah, nah - gnath-fliú
    You: is docha
    Stranger: Rud maith e sin
    You: Bhí mé ag scríobh gach rud as bearla roimh sin
    You: Agus duirt mé liom - B'fhéidir go bhfuil gaeilge le duine amháin
    You: agus an chéad duine!!
    Stranger: Domhain beag, nach é
    You: Sin ceart
    You: Cad is ainm duit ar aon nós?
    Stranger: Daithi is ainm dom
    Stranger: agus thu fein?
    You: Seán
    You: Deas buladh leat a Daithí!
    You: bualadh*
    Stranger: Agus and rud ceine ar ais duitse a Shean!
    Stranger: Slan go foill


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 20,759 ✭✭✭✭dlofnep


    Connecting to server...
    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
    Stranger: Horny male here from california wants to trade pics
    You: im 14.f.cali
    Stranger: cool whats up
    You: chillin
    Stranger: im 18
    Stranger: Whats your naem
    Stranger: name*
    You: brittany
    You: you
    Stranger: Adam
    You: hi adam
    You: where in cali??
    Stranger: Los Angeles
    You: what part?
    Stranger: haha why somany questions
    You: just being friendly
    Stranger: Im from Carson
    You: ah ok
    You: u want my pics
    Stranger: sure
    Stranger: Wanna send them to my phone?
    You: mk
    Stranger: (edited out)
    You: what will u send me in return
    Stranger: some pics
    You: ok
    Stranger: Send me some sexy ones
    You: Hi this is Chris Hansen with Dateline NBC. Why don't you have a seat over there?
    Your conversational partner has disconnected.

    PWN!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,581 ✭✭✭✭TheZohanS


    Connecting to server...

    Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

    Stranger: wanna see my cock( only girls)

    You: hey there

    You: sure

    Stranger: msn?

    You: no, my dad won't let me have it after last time

    You: he caught me camming with my ex

    Stranger: pleas give msn

    You: my dad won't let me have msn because he caught me naked with my ex

    Stranger: skype/

    Stranger: ?

    You: no, i just have photos

    Stranger: naked

    Stranger: ?

    You: yes

    Stranger: send

    You: I'm 15

    You: where do you live?

    Stranger: belgium

    You: age?

    Stranger: 17

    You: I'm really 14

    Stranger: Send photos


    Your conversational partner has disconnected.

    or save this log or send us feedback.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,463 ✭✭✭Leftyflip


    Stranger: male 18 looking for horny female with msn

    You: I am a priest

    Your conversational partner has disconnected.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,731 ✭✭✭dmcg90


    Connecting to server...

    Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

    Stranger: horny girl?

    You: nope

    Stranger: girl?

    You: im a dude!

    Your conversational partner has disconnected.



    Haha first go too! Even child molesters dont want to molest me!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,731 ✭✭✭dmcg90


    dlofnep wrote: »
    PWN!
    Connecting to server...
    Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
    Stranger: i have big dick
    You: really i didnt know
    Stranger: u can see
    You: i can see it, im outside your window watching you
    Stranger: lol
    Stranger: you cant see
    You: no seriously
    Stranger: i am not naked
    Stranger: i am not teen :)
    You: stop lying!
    You: jesus that wasnt hard to guess!
    You: whats ur name
    Stranger: joe
    Stranger: http://www.myspace.com/EDITEDFORLEGALREASONS
    You: im chris hansen

    Your conversational partner has disconnected.

    Sorry man I had to use your line at the end!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 141 ✭✭monalitto


    http://www.omegle.com

    And post your random funny conversations.
    messing with this, hubby watchin poker on telly zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,713 ✭✭✭Bonavox


    Leftyflip wrote: »
    Stranger: male 18 looking for horny female with msn

    You: I am a priest

    Your conversational partner has disconnected.

    EPIC :pac::D


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