Tomorrow's Irish Independent

abouttobebanned · 12-08-2009 11:16AM #1

They spend the whole year being ostracised by their class mates, being called swots...sitting in at the weekend etc....but the day after leaving cert results is their day. The day where they get to be on the front page of the independent, with a smug little smile saying how they're so surprised that they got 9As. Me arse you are.

Let's try and guess what they'll be like tomorrow...it's almost always a girl, they generally struggle to find a fella who got 9As and when they finally do they're not too keen on taking his picture cause he's chinese.

Tomorrow's swot is going to be a pretty white girl,no doubt. Probably called Aoife.

"Oh i'm really happy...all my friends did really well too...we're all gonna watch DVDs at my house tonight." No you're not.

Cookie_Monster · 12-08-2009 11:19AM

There'll be less than last year anyway. only 143 got 600 points, as opposed to 216 last year.
Fail rates up too

Must be a load of thickos this year

skywalker · 12-08-2009 11:19AM

Jesus, jealous much?

abouttobebanned · 12-08-2009 11:21AM

skywalker wrote: »

Jesus, jealous much?

i can't imagine Jesus is that jealous to be honest. He's got loads goin on.

ScumLord · 12-08-2009 11:22AM

Pft, A's are for losers. Failure is where it's at these days, I didn't get any A's.

Edit: I just remembered I did get one A. Now I feel dirty.

strangeloop · 12-08-2009 11:23AM

abouttobebanned wrote: »

"Oh i'm really happy...all my friends did really well too...we're all gonna watch DVDs at my house tonight." No you're not.

Funny because it's true:D

stovelid · 12-08-2009 11:24AM

abouttobebanned wrote: »

They spend the whole year being ostracised by their class mates, being called swots...sitting in at the weekend etc....but the day after leaving cert results is their day. The day where they get to be on the front page of the independent, with a smug little smile saying how they're so surprised that they got 9As. Me arse you are.

Let's try and guess what they'll be like tomorrow...it's almost always a girl, they generally struggle to find a fella who got 9As and when they finally do they're not too keen on taking his picture cause he's chinese.

Tomorrow's swot is going to be a pretty white girl,no doubt. Probably called Aoife.

"Oh i'm really happy...all my friends did really well too...we're all gonna watch DVDs at my house tonight." No you're not.

It's never too late for you, OP.

http://www.ioe.ie/

Local-womanizer · 12-08-2009 11:25AM

No matter what they get,they will still end up in a pool of their own sick crying at the fact they have to leave their friends.Happens every year.

topper75 · 12-08-2009 11:25AM

I'll admit it I'm jealous of these gifted people and their smileysmug photos.
One of my other flaws is that I sometimes forget to stock up on jack's roll.

Kiera · 12-08-2009 11:25AM

Why are you pissing on Aoife’s parade?

mobius42 · 12-08-2009 11:27AM

Cookie_Monster wrote: »

There'll be less than last year anyway. only 143 got 600 points, as opposed to 216 last year.
Fail rates up too

Must be a load of thickos this year

Or less bastards.

KevR · 12-08-2009 11:27AM

Cookie_Monster wrote: »

There'll be less than last year anyway. only 143 got 600 points, as opposed to 216 last year.
Fail rates up too

Must be a load of thickos this year

More likely that less parents could afford to get grinds for their children.

stovelid · 12-08-2009 11:29AM

Admittedly, they interviewed a lad on RTE 1 this morning that did sound a little smug.

JupiterKid · 12-08-2009 11:33AM

So what if they got 9 A1s? Isn't that better than if they were drug addled and banged up for their third babby?

I really hate the way success is dissed on in this country. Begrudgery, jealousy and bitterness is alive and well in this little benighted isle of ours...:(

TheZohanS · 12-08-2009 11:38AM

JupiterKid wrote: »

So what if they got 9 A1s? Isn't that better than if they were drug addled and banged up for their third babby?

I really hate the way success is dissed on in this country. Begrudgery, jealousy and bitterness is alive and well in this little benighted isle of ours...:(

People measure success in different ways.

Personally I think yo should go for both, then nobody can begrudge you.

--Kaiser-- · 12-08-2009 11:42AM

I for one would be much more impressed with a kid downing a couple a bottle of vodkas and then getting his stomach pumped

Pighead · 12-08-2009 11:44AM

Pighead remembers well making the shaky leg walk up to t he school to collect his results. Was nervous as hell as Brickhead Brennan had wagered a fiver that he would get more points than Pighead in History. Trouble was, Pighead hadn't got a fiver. He'd spent it the previous night buying Big Boobs Brady drink in the hope she'd let Pighead stick his hands up her jumper.

Anyway walked up to the doors and Mrs Smith walks out and she says "Ah Pighead, well done my boy! Between you and me, you aced the History exam, A1 for you sir!" Suddenly Pighead's shaky legs started to strut. Thought he'd fcuked up the History ya see. Obviously underestimated how clever he was" Opened the results and seen a big stinking C3 written beside History.

Looked to the left and seen Brickhead Brennan smugly waving his B1 in Pigheads general direction. Looked to the right and heard Mrs Smith saying "Oh shoot, sorry Pighead, it must have been the other Pighead who got the A1"

Had no money so had to give Brickhead a pair of shoes to cancel the debt which in turn meant that Pighead couldn't go drinking as Mama Pighead doesn't allow any of the Pighead clan to go drinking without their shoes on. Worst day ever.

abouttobebanned · 12-08-2009 11:44AM

JupiterKid wrote: »

So what if they got 9 A1s? Isn't that better than if they were drug addled and banged up for their third babby?

I really hate the way success is dissed on in this country. Begrudgery, jealousy and bitterness is alive and well in this little benighted isle of ours...:(

We're not dissing success...kudos to success. We're dissing smugness and false modesty! Personally, I love the fuck out of success, and intelligent people, but I have a not so secret hatred for smug 18 year old girls.

lala stone · 12-08-2009 11:45AM

These A1ers always seem to be from Cork? anyone notice that?!

Kiera · 12-08-2009 11:49AM

abouttobebanned wrote: »

We're not dissing success...kudos to success. We're dissing smugness and false modesty! Personally, I love the fuck out of success, and intelligent people, but I have a not so secret hatred for smug 18 year old girls.

If I was Aoife I’d be pretty smug and tell the world how hard work does pay off. I’d say your hatred for 18yr old girls comes from somewhere else

dub_skav · 12-08-2009 11:52AM

If they were that clever they'd have realised only 6 subjects count, why bother studying for 9 - morons

abouttobebanned · 12-08-2009 11:52AM

Hey, if she says hard work pays off, and sitting in for the year becoming addicted to red bull and masturbation leads to results, then I applaud her. If she says she did "a bit of study" and is "surprised at the results" then she should be smacked.

12-08-2009 11:59AM

Yes, because our native anti-intellectualism has served us so well. Exhibit A, our Iar-Thaoiseach who could hardly construct a sentence but achieved so much, such as, um...

stovelid · 12-08-2009 12:29PM

dub_skav wrote: »

If they were that clever they'd have realised only 6 subjects count, why bother studying for 9 - morons

Fluffing one subject out of six could mess up your points; fluffing one out of nine means you can juggle your good subjects.

rhapsody! · 12-08-2009 12:30PM

994 wrote: »

Yes, because our native anti-intellectualism has served us so well. Exhibit A, our Iar-Thaoiseach who could hardly construct a sentence but achieved so much, such as, um...

Beating anorexia.

stovelid · 12-08-2009 12:33PM

994 wrote: »

Yes, because our native anti-intellectualism has served us so well. Exhibit A, our Iar-Thaoiseach who could hardly construct a sentence but achieved so much, such as, um...

Being in the highest political position in the country?

PCPhoto · 12-08-2009 12:45PM

lala stone wrote: »

These A1ers always seem to be from Cork? anyone notice that?!

like this guy

http://breakingnews.ie/ireland/cork-student-gets-nine-a1s-in-leaving-cert-422258.html

PCPhoto · 12-08-2009 12:46PM

abouttobebanned wrote: »

They spend the whole year being ostracised by their class mates, being called swots...sitting in at the weekend etc....but the day after leaving cert results is their day. The day where they get to be on the front page of the independent, with a smug little smile saying how they're so surprised that they got 9As. Me arse you are.

Let's try and guess what they'll be like tomorrow...it's almost always a girl, they generally struggle to find a fella who got 9As and when they finally do they're not too keen on taking his picture cause he's chinese.

Tomorrow's swot is going to be a pretty white girl,no doubt. Probably called Aoife.

"Oh i'm really happy...all my friends did really well too...we're all gonna watch DVDs at my house tonight." No you're not.

Feck Aoife....Rory wiped the floor with her :P

EDIT: See previous message

Naikon · 12-08-2009 12:49PM

stovelid wrote: »

Fluffing one subject out of six could mess up your points; fluffing one out of nine means you can juggle your good subjects.

I only bothered to do 6 since I decided mid year to simply not sit Irish.
Still, most people should do 7 if they can.

Irish is a load of arse in fairness to me though : P

stovelid · 12-08-2009 12:50PM

PCPhoto wrote: »

like this guy

http://breakingnews.ie/ireland/cork-student-gets-nine-a1s-in-leaving-cert-422258.html

That's the lad I heard this morning.

Sounded a bit smug, but fair play to him.

dub_skav · 12-08-2009 12:53PM

stovelid wrote: »

Fluffing one subject out of six could mess up your points; fluffing one out of nine means you can juggle your good subjects.

I understand doing 7 - did 7 myself. But a guy who got 9 A1s hardly felt he was going to fluff 3 subjects.
9 is just showing off

Tomorrow's Irish Independent

Comments