I am new to this country and want to know why everyone is so rude.

Wow, hard to know what to make of your posts OP. After being asked multiple times for examples you eventually revealed that a lot of your misgivings arise from interactions with Gardai, ticket sellers at the train station, bank personnel on the phone etc. Personally, I wouldn't really categorize those as social interactions. I will admit that customer service in Ireland is not particularly polite, especially compared to the superficial politeness of these encounters in the USA where I live.

By the way, why do you seem so reluctant to mention where you're from despite having been asked numerous times? It's highly relevant. If for instance you are American, you are going to find that Irish people just don't practice that superficial "have a nice day" approach that a lot of Americans do in casual encounters. I do find the phone manner of customer service here to be a bit craptastic, the banks are some of the worst for this. It's just the way it is and really not a big deal.

You received a great response from another user above who pointed out that Irish people are very tight knit and tend to have a close group of friends and family that they rely upon for their social interactions. If you go into a pub you aren't going to find a ton of people sitting around just waiting to chat with you cause they've generally got others present that they are out to see. You are going to find this especially true since you say that you are "middle aged" and most people in this country are fairly settled by that point in their lives.

I live in the States myself and have done for a long time. It's very different here, people are much easier to strike up conversations with if you go into a pub or restaurant a lot of the time. However those interactions are pretty superficial and sometimes tend to be fairly insincere too. They are also virtually always one offs. Same applies to Australia too I feel (having once lived there for a year).

I'd be genuinely perplexed if you were having this experience having come here from the UK. Despite what people might tell you our cultures are very similar and I just wouldn't expect a Brit to be that surprised by people's manner here.

Ultimately, I don't agree with you at all that Irish people aren't friendly. I find them to to be quite the opposite, with exceptions obviously. The level of vitriol in your posts makes me feel you're going through a bad time on some more personal level and you are projecting some unhappiness onto the "friendliness" of people in this country. Endless demands to know "WHY ARE PEOPLE SO RUDE" are not going to receive satisfaction since most on here don't agree with you that we actually are rude.

Again, would love to know where you're from cause it's relevant to compare cultural attitudes with the country you've left.

OP has said this is their first time overseas so has no other experience to compare with other than their own country which they seem reluctant to reveal for some reason.If OP is actually genuine and not on a wind up, then can only be from US or maybe Canada.

As someone who has travelled a lot and lived in other countries, Ireland is more friendly and less rude than most places. US is only place I can say would be friendlier, but I have had bad experiences there as well. I have lived in the US and found the people to be very open and optimistic, whilst Irish people are by nature more cynical. I know when I first moved home, I struggled to deal with that cynical/begrudgery streak in Irish people, but definitely not a rude or unfriendly nation.

This honestly seems like a wind up.

New to Ireland wrote: »

Thank you for your reply. Yes I agree, I am taking it too personally, I wish I had the skills to not do so. I'm not a dick, too nice is probably more like it, Irish people seem to detest manners.

So far I've traveled Ireland, read books and watched as many documentaries as I can, I work with Irish people in Dublin, I've taken an Irish language course at nights for 3 months, joined Irish clubs, listen to Irish social commentary each day etc. I'm trying and not just whinging. I've 5 books next to me all Irish related to try better myself.

I moved home to Ireland in 2015 after 6 years abroad in 3 different countries, and I don't share your experience of Dublin being rude/ awful. It was my first time ever living in the capital and actually I'd say much the opposite. I think people are very friendly.

I know people are saying "maybe it's you" in a smartarse way, but in a more genuine way it seems like you may need counselling or something. Having moved from wherever you came from you're having trouble adjusting, and instead of looking at your own issues, you're blaming your environment.

I'm guessing you're American?

Don't let the door hot ya on the way out there op.....

Yellow_Fern wrote: »

All Irish people have traveled, usually extensively. Everyone has non Irish perspectives

Yet they consistently are immune to learning from other places on the planet...

Also, just to offer a different perspective, the first time I went to the US I *hated* how chatty the salespeople and servers were.

It was very clear to me that their “friendliness” was directly to do with their commission/ tips; completely insincere.

But if that’s what you’re used to you might miss it.

bubblypop wrote: »

I think the OP said they had experienced other countries

Yes, that could be correct. I reread the post and it said there first ever overseas trip was to Ireland, which is clearly not the same as being their only overseas experience.

I'm guessing he's American too. I've lived there too and the other poster correctly stated how everyone in hospitality and customer service are super friendly in a superficial way over there. They all want you to "have an awesome day" and when you walk into Gap or Old Navy, the greeter on minimum wage is absolutely delighted you set foot in the door and beams a "welcome to Gap" greeting. If you say thanks 5 times in a conversation, they will respond "you're welcome" 5 times in a cheery sing along tone. In restaurants, the waiter announces his name and how he is delighted to be serving you this evening. All of thAt is fine but superficial. An American not getting that level of hyper enthusiastic customer support from Irish staff may view them as bring rude.

OP, also trying to ingratiate yourself into all things Irish based on all that research and Irish club joining you did is not the way to connect. You might as well hang out in Irish Carroll's gift shop all day if you think that will make you more "down with the Irish". If you loved tennis, soccer, darts, singing, cooking at home, they are the club's you should be joining here as your personality will shine and connect with other club members that way when you're doing something you naturally enjoy.

New to Ireland wrote: »

Irish people please give your opinion.

Things I have noticed as an outisider visiting and living in this country as a middle-class white, educated, middle-aged man, Irish are NOT friendly or funny despite an outdated reputation, everyone is selfish and in a rush, will take everything they can get, hate manners and social etiquette like hello, please and thank you, love English things more than their own Irish culture, think that WE are rude as nice, polite outsiders, have no accountability and love to whinge at the pub about everything (a reputation given to the English funny enough).

Please enlighten me, give me something, i have completely lost my love of this country and am now just beginning to hate it which I don't want.

Why does no one want to help anyone here, or have meaningful, progressive conversations? Why is hating on everyone, being angry and rude ok but then call anyone else who cares arrogant?

I think at this stage we need to know more about you. Where are you from? What area of the city do you live in? What area do you work in?

Capital cities the world over can seem cold and brutal places, there's a survival of the fittest mentality and it can be harsh. I lived in London for 3 months it wasn't my cup of tea I moved on.

Another factor is our expectations and personal rules about what politeness is and we have to recognize that not everyone has those strict set of rules. My German friend was afraid I'd find German people cold and rude because Irish people say sorry all the time, the same goes for my spanish friend who says that people back home don't say thank you as much as Irish people.

ongarboy wrote: »

If you loved tennis, soccer, darts, singing, cooking at home, they are the club's you should be joining here as your personality will shine and connect with other club members that way when you're doing something you naturally enjoy.

This. OP the encounters you list with 'Irish' people are not encounters in normal social situations where you are seeing people in their best light.
You are encountering rush hour rat race commuters and bureaucrats.

I mean, look at the other threads on boards.ie...
You'll find Irish people complaining about the rudeness of other commuters, or downright dangerousness(!) of other rush hours drivers. I expect the boards.ie equivalent in London or Paris is the same.
Here we go:
https://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2058047381

You'll find Irish people complaining about their encounters with bureaucrats in the Irish public system. I think the politeness - or lack of - of bureaucrats is a running joke in most countries e.g. America's DMV.

You'll find Irish people complaining about bad experiences with staff in shops, restaurants, pubs... I think finding ALL of them rude though suggests a cultural misunderstanding \ friction however.

The OP is obviously a native speaker of English and North American would seem to be the most likely so I agree with the others about the whole culture shock of finding that not everyone will hope that you 'have a nice day' at every opportunity.

Either that or its someone we may have met before (no idea) who is on a bit of a wind-up.

However this is Humanities so there should be a bit more of a ... what? Academic? approach to this question. First OP you are asking us to agree with you that 'all Irish people are rude'. Just on the general law of averages not everyone in the country is rude. In fact the vast majority are not, quite the reverse. Especially if you happen to have an accent that could be construed as Tourist $$!!

Have you considered that maybe your approach may be considered rude? The Irish approach to conversation, even with officialdom, is to phrase your question in a roundabout sort of way, kind of approach the topic from the side rather than head-on. So you don't say 'what time is the train to Wherever' you smile and say 'I wonder would you happen to know what time etc' or 'could you help me please, I need to get the train to X, what time would that be, do you know? Ok I am laying it on a bit thick, but the general idea is there. If you are used to snapping demands then you might expect to get snappy replies.

I came to Ireland some half a century ago, and I will admit that it took me just about 5 years to fully realise that just because we were all speaking English it didn't mean we were all speaking the same language. Life got a lot easier after that.