Are women as desperate for sex?

Sarahdunners wrote: »

I think that all men and women have this same sex drive, but I personally think that women have more respect and empathy for men.

They don't think, "I have this sex drive and it must be fulfilled NOW. YOU owe me sex! "

I was reading about the rape case of Thordis Elva. She did a TED talk with her rapist.

He said that he presumed that he was owed sex because she was his girlfriend , and that "he was worth more than her".

These are the attitudes that we need to change

It really all boils down to animal instinct and biology. Men are made to impregnate and women are made to get pregnant. Unfortunately, our biology hasn't caught up with the idea of monogamy and mutual respect, so as men, we are solely reliant on self control, but the urges remain.

Woman dont need the sex drive that a man has, in order to fulfill nature's purpose.

I'm speaking from a biological perspective. Men respecting women comes down to upbringing and attitudes are changing for the better, in my opinion but I'm a man so I wouldn't know for sure.

Accepting Cookies wrote: »

Oh really, I would think the disgusting display of a lack of empathy award goes to Tacitus Kilgore when he rudely dismissed her awful experience as "muck." I was disgusted to read that. Nothing to say of that, Plopsu? Standing by your "bro," are you? At least the poster Sarahdunners raises some interesting and intelligent angles, some of the other comments are nothing more than keyboard warriors. Maybe lack of sex is causing pent up rage, lol.

Here Sarah, stop trying to make the thread about something else. Read the title, and the latest reply from google plus, says it fairly well.

Accepting Cookies wrote: »

Oh really, I would think the disgusting display of a lack of empathy award goes to Tacitus Kilgore when he rudely dismissed her awful experience as "muck." I was disgusted to read that. Nothing to say of that, Plopsu? Standing by your "bro," are you? At least the poster Sarahdunners raises some interesting and intelligent angles, some of the other comments are nothing more than keyboard warriors. Maybe lack of sex is causing pent up rage, lol.

Perhaps, I didn't comment on it because he/she was making fun of a poster whose veracity he/she obviously doubted as opposed to making a statment about the entire population of the world which his/her own behaviour directly contradicted.

I love the way, when some posters are disagreed with, they go straight for nonsense like your last sentence (which also contradicts the bit I quoted from her, so well done for making my point for me... lol).

jimgoose wrote: »

Well Whiteknighted, chief. You should ask her for sex, get in before the hundreds of other fellas that ask her every day. :pac::pac::pac:

One gets the feeling it would be a self-pleasuring situation, Jim.

Accepting Cookies wrote: »

I'm a woman, so plenty of my own unsolicited offers to deal with. I couldn't even buy a painting rod extender in the local hardware the other day without the male employee making a sexual pole joking dance joke about it at me. **** like this has been happening for as long as I can remember. I am very interested to hear answers to what Sarah has asked and what she has to say.

All I can say is, you must be utterly mesmerizing creatures, you and that other chungwan. :pac:

Accepting Cookies wrote: »

You must be an utterly non-informed male...

Uninformed. "Non-informed" is one of these bullshine non-words, like "revert to". And I suggest you find a better class of hardware store.

Accepting Cookies wrote: »

Is that all you have, grammar policing? I suggest men working in hardware stores or anywhere for that matter, behave better. I shouldn't have to drive all over looking for a hardware shop not to be sexually harassed in. Are you actually for real? Part of the problem. Sure, he can't be expected not to do it, so I need to fix the problem by going to another one, and then another one, and then another one... wow.

If you have a genuine problem with that man I suggest you contact his employer and report him. That's what I would have done had I overheard such a performance by a so-called professional. And I further suggest you don't put words in my mouth, in most particular when you don't know the first thing about me.

A huge part of this is biology: men have between 270 and 1070 Nanograms Per Decilitre of Testosterone in their bodies (average level is 679) that peaks at around 20 and slowly declines over the course of their lives. Women tend to have between 15 and 70 ng/dL of the same hormone.

A woman I once knew was receiving medical treatment for abnormally high levels of testosterone commented at the time (paraphrasing) that she "didn't know how men get anything done! I'm horny all the time and find it hard to focus on anything". I remember thinking at the time that the world would be a much better place if we could just convince the producers of gin and pinot grigio to add a dash of testosterone to their products!

Sleepy wrote: »

...A woman I once knew was receiving medical treatment for abnormally high levels of testosterone commented at the time (paraphrasing) that she "didn't know how men get anything done! I'm horny all the time and find it hard to focus on anything". I remember thinking at the time that the world would be a much better place if we could just convince the producers of gin and pinot grigio to add a dash of testosterone to their products!

My better half experiences a similar effect from strawberry ice-cream and nice handbags - she does love a good handbag, that gal. I don't know, I'd say the wiring diagram is quite horrific... :pac:

This is a multifaceted problem and I am sure I will make some generalisations and miss some key points.

Think about it this way. An average or below average woman can go most nights of the week and go home with a guy who is a lot more attractive than them. A 5/10 woman can go out most nights of the week and go home with a guy who's a lot more attractive than them, but a 4-5/10 guy has no chance. This is the case for the majority of men, It's not a level playing field. I don't blame women for wanting the best, if I was in their shoes I'm sure I would seek the same. It's part of the heterosexual dynamic, women hold all the cards when it comes to dating.


In my circle of friends, I am the ugly bald one. Although I am happy in my own skin, there are odd times when I feel jealous of my extremely good looking friends who match with women constantly on these dating apps and have a lot of sex and intimate relationships with lots of different varyingly attractive women, simply because they can. Women throw themselves at them. It's one of our most animalistic desires to have sex with an attractive mate. Beautiful people are perceived to be more successful, wealthier, better in bed, more intelligent, their actions are tolerated more than less attractive people. That's the way most of our brains are hardwired, It's human nature.
There are exceptions. of course it's not all down to physical attractiveness. We all know those who 'punch above their weight', but they are the outliers. They aren't the desperate ones, they can be wealthy or have extremely attractive personalities.

A lot of guys are starved of love and attention, thus seek a meaningful emotional connection with a significant other. This manifests into desperation and most of us don't realise it when we actually manage to attract someone or match with someone. Desperation, AKA "nice guy" syndrome, isn't attractive to anyone. Being overly nice, over-complimenting, apologising for minor things that don't warrant apologies in the first place, mirroring personalities, clinginess, laughing at everything they say, agreeing with everything they say, acting very familiar, move things along at a very unreasonably quick pace, saying "I love you" within the first few weeks. Desperation makes guys do anything to impress a potential partner in an attempt to feel this sense of connection they so desperately crave, but the way some of us go about this is fundamentally wrong. The attractive guys more often don't have to put in a lot of effort to impress and so don't exhibit this overwhelming sense of desperation.

Undoubtedly dating apps have been revolutionary in the sense that they have brought together so many people from varying parts of the world that would have never met without them. However, in my opinion, they have inadvertently severely limited the dating pool for a lot of below and average-looking men. This feeds into the growing sense of loneliness and narcissism for both sexes nowadays.
However, women have greater social connections, they are more likely to talk to their friends when they feel lonely. Unfortunately, a lot of males feel don't have this safety net because males inherently keep their problems to themselves, therefore, feeding into chronic loneliness, and also because of societal stigma that fuels toxic culture.

I think some guys mistakenly believe that a lack of deep emotional connections in their lives can be reversed by having sexual encounters. This is part of the reason why men straight up ask for sex. The other factor is testosterone of course which makes us want the ride.

For some men, sex is fundamental to forming a bond with someone or developing a relationship, without it, it feels more like a friendship. It feels nice for someone to lay in your arms, it feels nice to feel desired.

I have been that desperate guy and it has never worked for me, it has been a huge turnoff for the opposite sex. But thankfully this year I have managed changed my mentality to change the way I approach dating. While I haven't had any solid success this year, women have become a lot more receptive to me despite my unattractiveness. I am hoping for something positive next year.