Masturbation when room sharing

sparksfly · 20-09-2018 2:39am

jbt123 wrote: »

KevinCavan wrote: »

Sal Butamol wrote: »

What if you are homeless?

I think you can legally **** in a Garda station if you are homeless

Nah...if you're homeless and pregnant.. then you can defecate in a Garda hat..

Not two legal facts that I would fancy trying to justify in court.

sbsquarepants · 20-09-2018 7:01am

Hector Bellend wrote: »

Whats the name for when a gang of lads **** onto a digestive biscuit? It includes at least three blokes trying to shoot their load on to a biscuit. The last lad to shoot off must eat the spooge laden biscuit

Oh, I know that one - it's called "fúcking depraved"

Has to be an urban myth - but then again, who the hell knows these days!

greenspurs · 20-09-2018 7:39am

sbsquarepants wrote: »

Oh, I know that one - it's called "fúcking depraved"

Has to be an urban myth - but then again, who the hell knows these days!

it happens...... 'fo real bruh' ..... :cool:

Homer · 20-09-2018 7:46am

Sal Butamol wrote: »

What if you are homeless?

We demand Forever ****.. what bout the bankers, I mean wankers

fryup · 20-09-2018 7:53am

do it in the backyard with you're uncle like Frank Drebin....:pac:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8r_dXbWf2Aw

Kivaro · 20-09-2018 9:10am

Sal Butamol wrote: »

What if you are homeless?

Well, you'll do it then in the fancy hotel room that they give you.

pickarooney · 20-09-2018 3:02pm

jbt123 wrote: »

Nah...if you're homeless and pregnant.. then you can defecate in a Garda hat..

Just be sure not to summon this guy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzxQgRbTesA

fryup · 20-09-2018 4:30pm

wankin is a private pastime and should be done in private, doing it whilst others are around is plain wrong

greenspurs · 20-09-2018 4:43pm

fryup wrote: »

wankin is a private pastime and should be done in private, doing it whilst others are around is plain wrong

a perfectly natural behaviour, that the vast majority of people do.

I have caught/seen a couple of people, and I have been also.

Franz Von Peppercorn · 20-09-2018 6:24pm

greenspurs wrote: »

a perfectly natural behaviour, that the vast majority of people do.

I have caught/seen a couple of people, and I have been also.

It’s perfectly natural but getting caught isn’t.

trashcan · 20-09-2018 6:39pm

pickarooney wrote: »

I don't know why it annoys me so much but his name is Tom Hanks, with an S, it's not valid rhyming slang!

Indeed. An Anne Frank then.

everlast75 · 20-09-2018 6:45pm

A sherman tank

gandalf · 20-09-2018 6:57pm

Thanks a ****in lot I'll never be able to look at a pack of digestives the same ever again!

Gael23 · 20-09-2018 7:17pm

fryup wrote: »

wankin is a private pastime and should be done in private, doing it whilst others are around is plain wrong

I agree. Hence it’s often referred to as “personal time”.

20-09-2018 7:39pm

Gael23 wrote: »

I agree. Hence it’s often referred to as “personal time”.

Is it? I'm gonna have to rethink the wording in my out-of-office email

fryup · 20-09-2018 8:20pm

Franz Von Peppercorn wrote: »

It’s perfectly natural but getting caught isn’t.

my point exactly, only amateurs get caught

jobbridge4life · 20-09-2018 8:23pm

Be gay. Fall in love. The end.

Owl. · 20-09-2018 11:07pm

I've never seen so many **** in one thread.

rickis tache · 20-09-2018 11:16pm

Owl. wrote: »

I've never seen so many **** in one thread.

you should check out the Manchester United thread......bucket load of them there...

eezipc · 20-09-2018 11:17pm

trashcan wrote: »

Indeed. An Anne Frank then.

Is that how she got caught?

ToddyDoody · 21-09-2018 1:22am

How did it get the name '****'. I notice ladies don't ****, so to speak. (thank god for that, says you)

skooterblue2 · 21-09-2018 4:35am

eezipc wrote: »

Is that how she got caught?

No, the German army knocked on their door selling 90% off bacon. That is what gave them away

Owl. · 21-09-2018 6:49am

rickis tache wrote: »

you should check out the Manchester United thread......bucket load of them there...

I actually thought about writing something similar to that but thought I might get in trouble

sbsquarepants · 21-09-2018 7:22am

I'm watching Ray Donovan at the moment. Great line in it last night - the young lad is telling the granddad about his mother catching him ****.
The granddad tells him "don't worry, it's natural, if god didn't want us to jerk off, he would have given us shorter arms":D

the purple tin · 21-09-2018 7:30am

Curtain off a small corner of the room and hang up a sign which reads '**** Corner'.

Day Lewin · 21-09-2018 7:36am

re: biscuit.

I hate to expose your collective ignorance, but in the cause of education...

Well, it isn't only biscuits. There are other, um, possible targets.

sbsquarepants · 21-09-2018 7:48am

Day Lewin wrote: »

re: biscuit.

I hate to expose your collective ignorance, but in the cause of education...

Well, it isn't only biscuits. There are other, um, possible targets.

Shot glass?

Jizz sambo?

Your sisters tonsils?

Don't leave us hanging:D

robarmstrong · 21-09-2018 8:41am

fryup wrote: »

wankin is a private pastime and should be done in private, doing it whilst others are around is plain wrong

Well see that's where the fun lies..

the purple tin · 21-09-2018 9:20am

robarmstrong wrote: »

Well see that's where the fun lies..

Perfect username :P

Deebles McBeebles · 21-09-2018 9:23am

Paul McCartney said recently that The Beatles used to **** in the same room while occasionally shouting names to get the job done quicker ie "Brigitte Bardot"

I'm not saying I like the idea but if its good enough for The Beatles....

the purple tin · 21-09-2018 9:27am

Deebles McBeebles wrote: »

Paul McCartney said recently that The Beatles used to **** in the same room while occasionally shouting names to get the job done quicker ie "Brigitte Bardot"

I'm not saying I like the idea but if its good enough for The Beatles....

Billy Shears you mean.

Deebles McBeebles · 21-09-2018 9:30am

the purple tin wrote: »

Billy Shears you mean.

What would he do if I sang outta tune, would he stand up and **** off on me?

ollkiller · 21-09-2018 9:32am

Soccer club I used to play with went for a weekend in Newcastle. 2nd night I got back in to the hotel at 3am and fell asleep. Teammate arrives back in at 4am, thought I was asleep, lies in his bed and proceeds to yank the lad off himself. I gave him a loud roar "take it elsewhere lad". He got up shouting that he needs a release. In fairness he did take it elsewhere. About 10 foot to the jacks to finish the job. Obviously I told everyone the next morning.

Day Lewin · 21-09-2018 11:11am

sbsquarepants wrote: »

Shot glass?

Jizz sambo?

Your sisters tonsils?

Don't leave us hanging:D

Aw cripes. I hate these little motherly chats.

Well, I've heard that it's very good for the complexion. If rubbed in well. And if some is good, then more is better, right?

and just be glad you're not the goalie of the losing team.

And that's my last word on the matter.

Masturbation when room sharing

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