Would you do this to a colleague?

Deandre Shapely Tape wrote: »

It's not just people on her own team she's pushing work onto. No one where I work objects to helping others out, taking on a bit extra now and then or occasionally taking on more senior work. But there is a limit. People also have their own jobs to do, and there's only so many hours in a day. Also, if someone is being paid more than you are, they are expected to be also taking on more responsibility than you.

You are telling this to the wrong audience, and your tetchy replies speak of a thin skinned person who cant take any advice that contradicts their own mindset. Pull her aside, tell her that you cant do her work and its as simple as that then just refuse if she leaves work for you. You need to be more assertive, the answer is nothing to do with who goes or who doesn't go for a meal.

Deandre Shapely Tape wrote: »

The thread was about the meal and was not started to seek advice about how to handle my colleague. My 'tetchy' replies are in answer to people who are jumping to conclusions, inventing their own scenarios and pulling the thread off topic.

I'm having an office party and I'm not inviting you.

Wanderer2010 wrote: »

Its illegal to make someone redundant for the stupid reasons you have outlined. I hope he sued your company.

Yes, yes, I'm sure his boss made him redundant with the reasoning that nobody liked him. I'm sure all the paperwork said that. Thats probably how it happened alright.

lazybones32 wrote: »

Was he beaten up for having @ssburgers syndrome? If not, why feel the need to include that? I fought often enough in the schoolyard - got beat up about a third of the time. I lived....

adds: sorry, i should have wrote that 'i survived' instead #imasurvivor #walklikebeyonce

Your friend must be in a very nice school..lots of children who are very sweet and nice are bullied for being ugly or quiet or fat or too effeminate or masculine for their gender or just softies in general or a multitude of other reasons other than being mean themselves.

....... wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

What exactly was this meeting you called about? That to me sounds like an ambush and from the outside there was certainly nothing genuine in it. As if ye really wanted to change things. That to me sounds like the writing was already on the walls and you wanted evidence that you tried to extend an olive branch.

Snowflake central in here...

Person A is an asshole.
People B, C, D, E, F, and G find that asshole difficult.
Person A is eventually isolated by their own crappy behaviour. Not because people are choosing to isolate them, but because nobody likes an asshole so it's a natural progression.

=

Person A is being bullied.

Loads of old crap. Sure, in the OP's example, organising an official staff do and excluding this person would have been very unpleasant and unfair.

But the thread has now turned to a situation where if someone is a prick and is therefore treated like they are a prick, then they are the victim.

DrPhilG wrote: »

Snowflake central in here...

Snowflakes are people who can't bear normal levels of warmth. That would be cold fish like you who don't understand what it takes to be decent and compassionate.

begbysback wrote: »

Did u just make up that definition of snowflake?

No more than did the people who originally derided normal people with normal decent manners as being fragile because they insisted that other people have normal decent manners.

DrPhilG wrote: »

Lol

#triggered

Did you just make up that definition of "triggered"?

bucketybuck wrote: »

Calls people snowflakes...

Then repeats just what everybody else had been saying. :pac:

Did you miss the point or are you deliberately twisting my post?

DrPhilG wrote: »

Sure, in the OP's example, organising an official staff do and excluding this person would have been very unpleasant and unfair.

But the thread has now turned to a situation where if someone is a prick and is therefore treated like they are a prick, then they are the victim.

I separately referenced the original question, and the assorted examples given since then, most recently the story told here:

....... wrote: »

There was an absolute nightmare of an individual in my last job.

This resulted in the poster being accused of bullying by PeterParker and told by Wanderer2010 that their company should be sued!