Would you do this to a colleague?

mariaalice · 13-12-2017 2:18pm

There might be mental health issues in that situation, people can truly feel victimised even if its not happening but to them it feels real.

....... · 13-12-2017 2:56pm

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PeterParker957 · 13-12-2017 3:42pm

That's uncalled for. You might not like someone or wish to work with them but mocking mental health I would argue is a no-no.

....... · 13-12-2017 3:46pm

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PeterParker957 · 13-12-2017 3:52pm

Gross lack of sensitivity there, and a lack of understanding of mental health issues.

"He''s not right in the head" IS offensive to people suffering. Trust me on that.

I know how hard it can be for people post-breakdown or other emotional crisis to get back to the workforce.

What may be seen as antisocial could be their coping mechanism.

Ishmael · 13-12-2017 4:07pm

It's a fairly lousy thing to do. Just remember, Karma is a bitch.

bucketybuck · 13-12-2017 4:07pm

"Being a dickhead to all and sundry is my coping mechanism".

....... · 13-12-2017 4:16pm

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Wanderer2010 · 13-12-2017 5:13pm

A good point.

Although this guy may have been difficult to work with, someone automatically calling them not right in the head is bang out of order. What about the other ppl in the office, some of whom probably smiled and did their work fine, they could have been child abusers, wide beaters and scumbags outside of work. I wonder woul "....." be as quick to label them?

....... · 13-12-2017 5:22pm

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Wanderer2010 · 13-12-2017 5:34pm

Im actually not and after reading your post I do feel a bit of sympathy towards your situation as it sounds like a really tough environment to work in, My issue was with this meeting that was pulled, I have seen situations like yours in workplaces and yes, the management should not have let it get so bad but this meeting probably felt like a big ambush from his side. And it just smacks of having your ducks lined up so that when he got the bullet, you could claim that you "tried" to help him.

Being honest now, can you 100% say that management were coming at that meeting with a genuine desire to help someone change their ways. Do you think your managers are or were compassionate people?

DEFTLEFTHAND · 13-12-2017 5:38pm

In the past I've been able to iron out difficulties with 'problem' work mates in social settings.

In a different environment and atmosphere you oftentimes see a another side to the person.

I've ended up liking and becoming close to people who I initially couldn't stand.

THEBLACKDEVIL · 13-12-2017 5:57pm

It sounds like that person had a personality disorder, probably paranoia as well, I worked with a chap similar to that guy you described, and although I felt very sorry for him, some of his behavior was incredibly hard to take on a daily basis. Unless you've experienced it first hand, you probably wouldn't understand how bad an atmosphere can be created in a work environment.
If people like this don't address their mental health issues, things only get worse with time.
But I wouldn't organize a work event and exclude anybody.

....... · 13-12-2017 6:03pm

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....... · 13-12-2017 6:11pm

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bertsmom · 13-12-2017 6:17pm

............... is every bit as entitled to a reasonable work environment as the chap who was mentally ill. I don't think just because he had an illness it was ok for him to be uncommunicative and rude at work. Work is work. we all have stuff going on at home with kids or elderly parents or financial troubles.
At work we have to be civil and professional and just get on with it. Mental illness is no reason to create problems for others.

Wanderer2010 · 13-12-2017 6:30pm

But mental illness can exist even in your colleagues who don't behave in a way that you judge as abnormal, that was my point to the other poster. Someone can be as mentally deranged as you could imagine and yet put on a face for work. Then someone can be struggling to fit in and use being antisocial as a defence and yet only the latter person gets tagged with the nutter label.

bucketybuck · 13-12-2017 6:34pm

I bet he went home every night thinking "what the **** do I have to do to get fired from this place!!!"

bertsmom · 13-12-2017 7:43pm

Wanderer2010 apologies I don't know how to quote,
I understand what you are saying and it's so true, the jovial guy next to you or Mary who makes the whole office laugh with her jokes could very well be an abusive partner or a paedophile BUT at work they don't make trouble for everyone over nothing or they don't cause unnecessary tension.
My point is we can only judge people at work on how they behave at work and unless it a working with children type situation (as an example)it's none of our business.
I just think at work people should behave with a bit of cop on and be civil. No one should have to socialise with someone they don't like. Mental illness is no reason to create a toxic environment for all the other employees.

Robsweezie · 13-12-2017 7:44pm

invite her OP, then suddenly launch into a rendition of this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dFOErVWlsxg

Would you do this to a colleague?

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