Learning to drive in my 30s.

Teyla Emmagan · 06-09-2016 08:16PM

A friend of mine just got his licence at the age of 40 (and a half). He only started about 8 months ago.

There is hope for everyone!

Posy · 06-09-2016 08:21PM

iguana wrote: »

Though it does feel a bit infuriating that I can't drive on the motorway and halve my driving time. Is driving at 120km on a 3 lane motorway really more dangerous than driving at 100km in two way traffic, that I have to do a right-hand turn on?

Maybe we can't drive on motorways because it halves the driving time and they know we need the practice! :pac:

Most driving schools do motorway lessons after you've passed your test, so you can go on one with your instructor before you have to venture out alone which I think is a really good idea.

GritBiscuit · 06-09-2016 08:22PM

My dad learnt to drive in his 40's...he said he struggled to get limbs working independently as well as being constantly vigilant but found the process very much like learning to ride a bike. Seems impossible at first and then you get more and more comfortable and eventually everything becomes second nature until you can't understand what was ever so difficult. I learnt at 17 and I'd say the process was exactly the same for me. Hang in there!
All the best.

iguana · 06-09-2016 08:33PM

Posy wrote: »

Maybe we can't drive on motorways because it halves the driving time and they know we need the practice! :pac:

I was thinking that as I typed my moan! :pac: It's what I'm going to tell myself every school day between now and when I pass my test. I also have to say that as much as he can sometimes infuriate me when being my sponsored driver, my dad is an absolute star for being willing to sit in the car with me on the school run.

And thinking ahead to when I pass my test. I wonder is there much benefit to doing the advanced driver training course as a new driver? Or is it more to iron out any bad habits that will have developed over years of driving?

Posy · 06-09-2016 08:39PM

I can't see it being a bad thing to be honest!

I know there's a driving school that offers 'Skid Control' lessons, which would probably be handy in the winter during icy weather. The first time you have a car go into a skid, it would be nice to have an instructor there telling you what to do!

InTheTrees · 06-09-2016 08:46PM

What is this absolute nonsense about implying that learning in ones 30's (or 40's or 50's) might somehow be more difficult?

If anything its probably a lot easier than when you're in your teens or 20's.

HH Barbara Allen · 08-09-2016 08:49PM

Well...I may not belong in this thread, as I first learned in my teens in the US. I have lived in Ireland for over two years, though, and haven't been brave enough to start driving until now. I think the longer one puts it off, the more intimidating it can become. I also think older folk are more aware of their mortality, in all honesty, and there's that as well.

iguana · 08-09-2016 10:21PM

InTheTrees wrote: »

What is this absolute nonsense about implying that learning in ones 30's (or 40's or 50's) might somehow be more difficult?

If anything its probably a lot easier than when you're in your teens or 20's.

My son started riding his bike at the start of the summer so coinciding with me starting to drive, is me spending most of my waking hours trying to impress upon a 3 year old that cars are deadly. I'm so conscious of my potential to kill when I'm behind the wheel that it definitely slowed my learning. Not necessarily a bad thing though because what does it matter if it takes me a few more months to learn to drive if it ultimately means that I'm a more conscientious driver than I might have been when I was 19?

J_R · 09-09-2016 03:20AM

InTheTrees wrote: »

What is this absolute nonsense about implying that learning in ones 30's (or 40's or 50's) might somehow be more difficult?

If anything its probably a lot easier than when you're in your teens or 20's.

Hi,

In the UK a rough formula instructors used to calculate the number of hours necessary to reach test standard was 1.5 times the pupils age. That was before the hazard perception was added so perhaps formula has changed since. The older you start learning the more hours driving is necessary. My view, mainly fear that holds the oldies back. Bit of confidence and they are good to go.

The younger the quicker a person learns.. To a child driving a car would be the same as playing with a toy.

I had a young girl pupil once. For her eleventh birthday her parents asked her what would she like, a car she said but they bought her an old van instead. So for the next six years she belted around the fields I asked her who taught her to drive the van. Nobody she said, I knew how from watching Daddy/Mammy driving.

After six years in fields she was an excellent driver. Just needed a few lessons to explain the rules regarding traffic lights and such

irishgirl19 · 09-09-2016 10:15PM

Ugh why is it so easy to drive my instructors car but so hard to drive my boyfriends. They're the same car but its takes me agggges to find the bite on his and feels like its dragging along

HH Barbara Allen · 10-09-2016 02:02AM

irishgirl19 wrote: »

Ugh why is it so easy to drive my instructors car but so hard to drive my boyfriends. They're the same car but its takes me agggges to find the bite on his and feels like its dragging along

I've never been able to drive my husband's car; it always stalls out on me if I so much as breath funny. I do know how to drive manual, but his car just hates me. And the feeling is mutual.

irishgirl19 · 10-09-2016 10:14AM

HH Barbara Allen wrote:

I've never been able to drive my husband's car; it always stalls out on me if I so much as breath funny. I do know how to drive manual, but his car just hates me. And the feeling is mutual.

Its driving me mad. He said hes getting the clutch done next month so maybe it will be easier then

Tasden · 10-09-2016 10:32AM

J_R wrote: »

Hi,

In the UK a rough formula instructors used to calculate the number of hours necessary to reach test standard was 1.5 times the pupils age. That was before the hazard perception was added so perhaps formula has changed since. The older you start learning the more hours driving is necessary. My view, mainly fear that holds the oldies back. Bit of confidence and they are good to go.

The younger the quicker a person learns.. To a child driving a car would be the same as playing with a toy.

I think this is spot on. The younger people don't think as much about the actual learning process, they just get in and do. (Maybe as they are used to being taught in that way from school? ) Also younger people want the independence etc and see driving as the done thing/a way to get that. If you don't drive for a few years then you become accustomed to public transport, you learn your routes, you become independent without the use of the car so there isn't as much "need" to learn unless something specific crops up in which case there is additional pressure there from the beginning. Without a "need" to learn I think it becomes more about the process of learning when you are older.
I hope to get my little one lessons as early as possible. I do think it's a life skill.

HH Barbara Allen · 10-09-2016 11:58AM

irishgirl19 wrote: »

Its driving me mad. He said hes getting the clutch done next month so maybe it will be easier then

Hope that sorts it. Clutches are tricky and vary so much in every car. I remember having to drive an unfamiliar Subaru on the fly back in the eighties when my friend had a diabetic incident. Not fun, but no one died.

iguana · 14-09-2016 09:19PM

A bit of a mixed week here. I drove my son out to school and came home yesterday and had great drives. No stalling, no stress, I was feeling like I'd pretty much cracked this driving thing. Then I went out to get him a few hours later and was stopped at a light on a hill and when the light went green I though I was ready, let down the handbrake and started rolling backwards. I pulled the handbrake, looked for the bite on the clutch, thought I had it, letdown the handbrake and rolled backwards again. I completely lost it. For the whole of the green light, I just couldn't make the car go forward. I was fantasising about just getting out of the car and doing a runner.

It didn't help that the drivers behind me were not understanding and were beeping like crazy and over took me to fill up the space between me and the light, that was now red and one of the cars couldn't fit and was almost sideways in front of me, practically wedged to my bumper, so it made it almost impossible for me to use the red light to calm down, and get the car ready to go. I managed it, but it really, really shook me. So on today's first school run, I was a bag of nerves. And at almost every single red light I had to come to a full stop and almost instantly the light changed, so I had to get going again without pause. It was excruciating. I managed to avoid a cock-up but my nerves were shot. I just didn't feel confident that I was controlling the car properly. I was alright later on when I went out to collect my son. Thankfully because driving through the small town I have to go through, there was one car parked in front of me indicating that it was pulling out but which turned out to be empty. And 30 seconds later a parked truck which was not indicating pulled out in front of me and I managed to stay calm. But I'm glad I have a lesson tomorrow as that will hopefully help get rid of the lingering nerves.

Posy · 14-09-2016 10:29PM

All the best with tomorrow's lesson!

I don't get aggressive drivers like that. Someone is learning- and they could cause an accident with their impatience.
Blowing your horn is not going to help calm the panicked learner driver in front of you. :mad:

I was planning to book a course of lessons starting this weekend, but now I'm thinking it might be a bad time to start to learn as it would have to be at weekends and evenings- and by the end of the month evenings will be ruled out as it will be dark when I'm finishing work.

I don't know if this makes sense or if I'm copping out! I'd only be postponing by about 4 months! Hmmmm.

InTheTrees · 15-09-2016 05:06AM

iguana wrote: »

It didn't help that the drivers behind me were not understanding and were beeping like crazy and over took me to fill up the space between me and the light, that was now red and one of the cars couldn't fit and was almost sideways in front of me, practically wedged to my bumper, so it made it almost impossible for me to use the red light to calm down, and get the car ready to go. I managed it, but it really, really shook me

Well done you handled it.

Cars are fickle things they can break down at any moment and other drivers know this, you can always hit your hazard flashers, give a few sorry waves and let them work out how to get around you, until traffic calms down a bit.

Dravokivich · 16-09-2016 04:27PM

Posy wrote: »

All the best with tomorrow's lesson!

I don't get aggressive drivers like that. Someone is learning- and they could cause an accident with their impatience.
Blowing your horn is not going to help calm the panicked learner driver in front of you. :mad:

I was planning to book a course of lessons starting this weekend, but now I'm thinking it might be a bad time to start to learn as it would have to be at weekends and evenings- and by the end of the month evenings will be ruled out as it will be dark when I'm finishing work.

I don't know if this makes sense or if I'm copping out! I'd only be postponing by about 4 months! Hmmmm.

There is a lesson that's meant to include a "night drive" and to be honest, it's coming up to the only time of the year it's practically for an instructor to do it.

16-09-2016 04:36PM

I had 1 driving lesson when I was 20, then didn't go near a car again until I was 30.
I booked a week long intensive driving course in Blackpool for about £800. 20 hours driving, 20 hours in the back watching for the 5 days then sat the test on the 6th day. Luckily I passed.
I wished I'd done it younger when I didn't have as much awareness of the dangers but now I feel I'm a safer driver because of it.

For those in N.I. the intensive course might be an option. For those struggling, I haven't driven a manual since the day I passed my test. Went on a working holiday to New Zealand, got an automatic and realised they're 10 times easier. Wouldn't go back

Vel · 16-09-2016 04:52PM

I'm not sure if anyone knows Nutgrove but in this link I was a couple of cars from the front in the lane going straight. The lane beside is right turn only. https://www.google.ie/maps/@53.291895,-6.269467,3a,75y,90h,90t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1s9OVAyiCCIx4ee_iMPa37ZQ!2e0!7i13312!8i6656!6m1!1e1

It was a really busy Sunday afternoon with lots of stopping and starting so I was quite flustered and unfortunately I stalled the car. Almost immediately there was a load of beeping from behind, which only made me more nervous, so I stalled once again as soon as I restarted. The car in the right hand lane beside me had moved forward so there was now a bit of space and just as I managed to restart, a car pushed in from the right hand lane and cut in front of me to go straight, which meant I had to slam on the brakes and I stalled again. And then a load of other cars followed that car, all passing me in the right hand turn lane, and cutting in to go straight. I managed to keep it together enough to make it through when the lights went green again, and guess what? I joined most of the impatient beepers and cutter uppers stopped at traffic lights further up the road!

I just don't get the level of impatience some people have, especially when the traffic is so busy anyway, that I am really not delaying them by very much at all.

I was really shaken and upset after that that I hadn't been in a car since so I was dreading this morning's lesson. I explained it all to the instructor who got me mentally back on track and despite some initial nerves I felt I had quite a good lesson.

Tasden · 16-09-2016 05:21PM

Vel wrote: »

I'm not sure if anyone knows Nutgrove but in this link I was a couple of cars from the front in the lane going straight. The lane beside is right turn only. https://www.google.ie/maps/@53.291895,-6.269467,3a,75y,90h,90t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1s9OVAyiCCIx4ee_iMPa37ZQ!2e0!7i13312!8i6656!6m1!1e1

It was a really busy Sunday afternoon with lots of stopping and starting so I was quite flustered and unfortunately I stalled the car. Almost immediately there was a load of beeping from behind, which only made me more nervous, so I stalled once again as soon as I restarted. The car in the right hand lane beside me had moved forward so there was now a bit of space and just as I managed to restart, a car pushed in from the right hand lane and cut in front of me to go straight, which meant I had to slam on the brakes and I stalled again. And then a load of other cars followed that car, all passing me in the right hand turn lane, and cutting in to go straight. I managed to keep it together enough to make it through when the lights went green again, and guess what? I joined most of the impatient beepers and cutter uppers stopped at traffic lights further up the road!

I just don't get the level of impatience some people have, especially when the traffic is so busy anyway, that I am really not delaying them by very much at all.

I was really shaken and upset after that that I hadn't been in a car since so I was dreading this morning's lesson. I explained it all to the instructor who got me mentally back on track and despite some initial nerves I felt I had quite a good lesson.

Best thing you can do is get straight back on the horse!
People beep me all the time despite my L plates, it's so rude.

stinkle · 16-09-2016 06:14PM

They all had to learn at some point too. I'm convinced once they see an L plate it just makes them beep regardless of what you do.

Wanderer41 · 16-09-2016 08:12PM

I find that learner drivers bring out the worst in people! My instructor said so too. I was once slowing to turn at a tight left (hard to explain), coming up to a corner. A van overtook me on a bend with cars coming. I wasn't holding everyone up or anything.
I was driving my own car about two days after I got insured, which was the first time I had ever driven outside a lesson, so I was nervous enough trying to get used to the car. I had to stop at lights and then I stalled when I tried to move off again.. and I stalled again... and again...

I got very flustered and someone beeped me which made me even worse. I found out then that moving from a stop is a little different in my car :pac: Since then though I haven't driven as far as there, I make someone else take over. Which I know is really bad, I haven't really driven in a town yet as I'm too afraid... I might try this weekend though. Unfortunately I'm not at home during the week which makes it even harder to get the practice in!

iguana · 16-09-2016 09:08PM

stinkle wrote: »

They all had to learn at some point too. I'm convinced once they see an L plate it just makes them beep regardless of what you do.

Oh they absolutely do. Back when I was first driving my car and going for practise drives with my dad, he'd drive us somewhere quiet, I'd take over and at the end he'd drive us home. My dad is pretty much a perfect driver, has been driving for nearly 40 years, was a truck driver and regularly drives a pretty big camper van. But even when he was driving, other drivers were constantly giving him shít and driving aggressively around us. His driving was flawless but they saw the L plates and acted like jerks.

playedalive · 18-09-2016 05:11PM

Vel wrote: »

I'm not sure if anyone knows Nutgrove but in this link I was a couple of cars from the front in the lane going straight. The lane beside is right turn only. https://www.google.ie/maps/@53.291895,-6.269467,3a,75y,90h,90t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1s9OVAyiCCIx4ee_iMPa37ZQ!2e0!7i13312!8i6656!6m1!1e1

It was a really busy Sunday afternoon with lots of stopping and starting so I was quite flustered and unfortunately I stalled the car. Almost immediately there was a load of beeping from behind, which only made me more nervous, so I stalled once again as soon as I restarted. The car in the right hand lane beside me had moved forward so there was now a bit of space and just as I managed to restart, a car pushed in from the right hand lane and cut in front of me to go straight, which meant I had to slam on the brakes and I stalled again. And then a load of other cars followed that car, all passing me in the right hand turn lane, and cutting in to go straight. I managed to keep it together enough to make it through when the lights went green again, and guess what? I joined most of the impatient beepers and cutter uppers stopped at traffic lights further up the road!

I just don't get the level of impatience some people have, especially when the traffic is so busy anyway, that I am really not delaying them by very much at all.

I was really shaken and upset after that that I hadn't been in a car since so I was dreading this morning's lesson. I explained it all to the instructor who got me mentally back on track and despite some initial nerves I felt I had quite a good lesson.

Yes I know that Nutgrove Avenue as a Learner Driver who used to drive to work in the shopping centre. It easily gets congested and I have gotten the beeps when there was space but, for me, I would have been blocking the junction for oncoming traffic. I have had people overtake me on either the left or right without an indicator. I just make super sure to have the biting point and have checked the mirrors before I move but there have been times I had to stop to get away from some bad drivers overtaking me on left or right. Rich coming from me as the learners but they were just inconsiderate.:mad:. You're best being sure for those extra seconds to check before clutching down slowly.

bannerman2005 · 22-09-2016 02:57PM

Hope everyone is getting on well with the practice. Was out for a marked drive with the instructor the other evening and got 11 grade 2's. Some silly mistakes that can be ironed out. Getting harder and harder to get out for practice with the evenings getting darker.

iguana · 23-09-2016 08:48PM

I'm wondering about applying for my test. I can't actually do a test until Nov 30th but I read on another thread that it can be possible to apply now, block out the dates I can't do and go on the waiting list. It's supposedly an average of 13 weeks wait here so getting on the waiting list now mightn't hurt. And I find I always work best towards anything when I have a deadline, so I think I'd drive and practice more than ever if I knew I had a potential test date. There is a very, very slim chance I could have my licence before Christmas but it would be a dream come true if I did.

(I have however passed the test of my three year old son. After weeks of being told I was a bad driver he is now telling anyone who will listen that I'm a good driver because I don't stop in the middle of the road anymore.)

Wanderer41 · 23-09-2016 10:45PM

iguana wrote: »

I'm wondering about applying for my test. I can't actually do a test until Nov 30th but I read on another thread that it can be possible to apply now, block out the dates I can't do and go on the waiting list. It's supposedly an average of 13 weeks wait here so getting on the waiting list now mightn't hurt. And I find I always work best towards anything when I have a deadline, so I think I'd drive and practice more than ever if I knew I had a potential test date. There is a very, very slim chance I could have my licence before Christmas but it would be a dream come true if I did.

(I have however passed the test of my three year old son. After weeks of being told I was a bad driver he is now telling anyone who will listen that I'm a good driver because I don't stop in the middle of the road anymore.)

That's adorable! I would go ahead and apply. At least you have applied then. I applied as soon as I had finished my 12 lessons, I'm still not ready for it, but at least when I get a date it will give me something to work towards. I haven't been doing much driving as I only got insured the week before going back to college and I haven't been home as much which is annoying as I think I just need more confidence really (as well as working on a few issues I know I have to fix).

Wanderer41 · 25-09-2016 12:00PM

Lately I've been getting more and more nervous about driving. I feel stressed just thinking about it now! Yesterday I had to move off after being stopped at traffic lights and made a lot of noise. That panicked me. I think I do worse when there are cars behind me as I'm so afraid of of stalling and not being able to start, or changing gears and doing something wrong. I know it's just practice I need but I just feel so stressed about driving

dennyk · 26-09-2016 08:43PM

Wanderer41 wrote: »

Lately I've been getting more and more nervous about driving. I feel stressed just thinking about it now! Yesterday I had to move off after being stopped at traffic lights and made a lot of noise. That panicked me. I think I do worse when there are cars behind me as I'm so afraid of of stalling and not being able to start, or changing gears and doing something wrong. I know it's just practice I need but I just feel so stressed about driving

Just don't let it get to you. If you stall, you stall; worst that happens is a few folks behind you are delayed a bit. Someone might honk at you or something, but screw 'em, that's their problem for lacking patience. After all, they were learners at some point too! Just focus on learning and practicing and driving safely and don't worry about what anyone else is thinking.

Learning to drive in my 30s.

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