Learning to drive in my 30s.

HH Barbara Allen

I'm taking lessons now. I drove in the US for nearly thirty years, so a lot of what I'm doing now is unlearning bad habits and adapting to driving on the left. It's been pretty disorienting, in general, and the rules of the road seem to be much stricter here in Ireland than what I was used to. I still have a long way to go when it comes to navigating narrow roads in small towns!

ETA: I've had one official lesson thus far. It's in my own car, which luckily is automatic, so I don't have to worry about the car rolling back on hill starts and such. I try to practice every day, though there aren't a lot of places to go where I live. And I hate the L plates, as I feel they block my vision and make me a target of abuse from others on the road.

bannerman2005

Vel wrote: »

I had a terrible lesson on Saturday. It was really windy and rainy so instructor decided I would just do some general driving. I feel like I really regressed with the clutch when I had been improving. Felt like I was making loads of mistakes. I was even getting mixed up with my lefts and rights! Had two incidents when I stalled at the traffic lights and someone in the queue behind me beeped, which makes me even more nervous and panicky. Came away from that lesson quite disheartened but just need to suck it up and keep going.

I'm really struggling to get the practice in which I know is not helping, so need to ensure I get out with my dad again this week

I think you just have to keep practicing Vel. Practice, practice and more practice. I was going ok for a recent practice run until I tried going from 5-2 gear and ended up in 4th. Totally put me off and then stalled just after that. Rest of drive on my practice route went ok and the reversing around a corner and turnabout were fine. I practiced 150 hill starts last week over 3 evenings and that has generally improved my confidence at lights and junctions on hills.

HH Barbara Allen

Vel wrote: »

I had a terrible lesson on Saturday. It was really windy and rainy so instructor decided I would just do some general driving. I feel like I really regressed with the clutch when I had been improving. Felt like I was making loads of mistakes. I was even getting mixed up with my lefts and rights! Had two incidents when I stalled at the traffic lights and someone in the queue behind me beeped, which makes me even more nervous and panicky. Came away from that lesson quite disheartened but just need to suck it up and keep going.

I'm really struggling to get the practice in which I know is not helping, so need to ensure I get out with my dad again this week

I remember going through similar when I was learning for the first time. It can be tough to strike a balance with what the car is doing and what you need to do, and it's hard not to feel awkward the first few times out. Having an instructor helps immensely, in my experience, but you already know that. The main thing is not to be discouraged: it does just take practice, and with practice you'll gain confidence.

rainbow kirby

I'm 32 and have failed my test three times already, all at Hendon test centre which has a <50% pass rate. I took a bunch of lessons up until January of this year, but when I failed my test for the third time at 32 weeks pregnant (partly due to restricted movement as a result of huge bump) I said fcuk it and stopped. I really should get back into it, but just haven't gotten around to booking more lessons or another test. I have 11 months to pass before I have to do my theory test again, which is a pain.

Dravokivich

From what I've been looking into regarding expectations of driving tests, there's a lot of intense situations people tend to be in, in the UK for no reason other than the volume of road users.

The circuit I've had a run over and the alternatives off it, don't tend to have too much other road users around you. Seems to allow one more of an opportunity to focus on themselves.

Have you been able to check out any other test centers that could give you that kind of environment?

shelly22

rainbow kirby wrote: »

I'm 32 and have failed my test three times already, all at Hendon test centre which has a <50% pass rate. I took a bunch of lessons up until January of this year, but when I failed my test for the third time at 32 weeks pregnant (partly due to restricted movement as a result of huge bump) I said fcuk it and stopped. I really should get back into it, but just haven't gotten around to booking more lessons or another test. I have 11 months to pass before I have to do my theory test again, which is a pain.

U just need to renew your learner permit no need to resist the theory test

rainbow kirby

I'm in the UK - theory is only valid for 2 years and I did it in July 2015.

rainbow kirby

Dravokivich wrote: »

From what I've been looking into regarding expectations of driving tests, there's a lot of intense situations people tend to be in, in the UK for no reason other than the volume of road users.

The circuit I've had a run over and the alternatives off it, don't tend to have too much other road users around you. Seems to allow one more of an opportunity to focus on themselves.

Have you been able to check out any other test centers that could give you that kind of environment?

Would have to go a long way out! I may look at centres in Hertfordshire, Essex or Kent.

irishgirl19

Ok its like I went backwards! I feel like an idiot. I broke a red light . it had just gone amber and I was first and thought id make it and it turned red. So annoyed at myself. I think I was panicing that I wouldn't have enough time to stop properly
Then I got stuck at lights first in the queue kept conking out repeatedly with someone beeping behind me.
Forgot to check my mirrors when changing lanes once.
And I thought my clutch control had improved but now I keep revving when im taking off. not sure what im doing wrong.
Nearly want to pack it in at this stage but know I won't.

bannerman2005

irishgirl19 wrote: »

Ok its like I went backwards! I feel like an idiot. I broke a red light . it had just gone amber and I was first and thought id make it and it turned red. So annoyed at myself. I think I was panicing that I wouldn't have enough time to stop properly
Then I got stuck at lights first in the queue kept conking out repeatedly with someone beeping behind me.
Forgot to check my mirrors when changing lanes once.
And I thought my clutch control had improved but now I keep revving when im taking off. not sure what im doing wrong.
Nearly want to pack it in at this stage but know I won't.

sorry to hear that Irishgirl.

I suppose the best thing to do is try and go out for another drive as soon as possible on a route that you know well that can get your confidence back. Its amazing how quickly 1 mistake can lead to a progression of mistakes. For taking off it might be worthwhile to practice in a quite car park. Just get a comfortable level of gas for setting off and practice that.

irishgirl19

bannerman2005 wrote:

I suppose the best thing to do is try and go out for another drive as soon as possible on a route that you know well that can get your confidence back. Its amazing how quickly 1 mistake can lead to a progression of mistakes. For taking off it might be worthwhile to practice in a quite car park. Just get a comfortable level of gas for setting off and practice that.

Thanks bannerman I think im going to do that tomorrow. Need to get my confidence back up.
Im not enjoying learning at all. Funny enough I was very proud of myself after the drive the other day, but the roads were very quiet then.
I still haven't even learned to park yet! Dreading that

bannerman2005

irishgirl19 wrote: »

Thanks bannerman I think im going to do that tomorrow. Need to get my confidence back up.
Im not enjoying learning at all. Funny enough I was very proud of myself after the drive the other day, but the roads were very quiet then.
I still haven't even learned to park yet! Dreading that

Are you getting lessons?

irishgirl19

bannerman2005 wrote:

Are you getting lessons?

Yes done about 6 so far. Leaving 2 week gaps in between

bannerman2005

irishgirl19 wrote: »

Yes done about 6 so far. Leaving 2 week gaps in between

yeah I did the same. I didn't get too much practice in for the first 4-5 lessons so progress was slow.

Once you are getting in 2-3 hours per week on top of the lessons you will get more confident.

ynul31f47k6b59

Vel wrote: »

I had a terrible lesson on Saturday. It was really windy and rainy so instructor decided I would just do some general driving. I feel like I really regressed with the clutch when I had been improving. Felt like I was making loads of mistakes. I was even getting mixed up with my lefts and rights! Had two incidents when I stalled at the traffic lights and someone in the queue behind me beeped, which makes me even more nervous and panicky. Came away from that lesson quite disheartened but just need to suck it up and keep going.

I'm really struggling to get the practice in which I know is not helping, so need to ensure I get out with my dad again this week

I felt a little bit like that yesterday - I drove through a busy town for the first time and it completely overwhelmed me, every second word out of my mouth was a curse word and I didn't have a clue where I was going, I need to know in my head what I'm at and I had two roundabouts one after another, found it really confusing, then stalled at a mini roundabout, stopped when I only needed to yield - thank god a guy in a jeep was really sound and let me out, but it flustered me and I wasn't right the whole way home. When I was almost home then I took a turn too wide and in the wrong gear, seemed to be going into 1st the whole time instead of 3rd (never an issue before) then there was a young kid on a bike in front of me and I panicked and crawled behind him so there was a line of cars behind me. Felt okay about the first half but really need to get roundabouts sorted, I don't understand them.

Finding it hard to get proper practice - now in fairness I've driven our own car to a nearby town home and back twice, which is more than I've ever done with it - but the busy town side of things terrifies me.

iguana

Super awkward moment this evening. I was parked in a shopping centre car park and was feeling a bit nervous about reversing out of the parking spot when it was time to leave. When we came back to the car, I saw that the car parked in front of me had changed and the driver of the new car had driven over the line into my space, to the point where they had about 4 feet of space in the space behind them but had only left about 3cm between our front bumpers. (And I was sloped toward them.) I completely freaked out when I saw it, terrified that if I made even the tiniest of mistakes when trying to reverse out, I'd go straight into them.

I started ranting to my husband about it, loudly asking what sort of eejit would park so close to any car, never mind a learner driver. And about how very nervous it was making me, which would make me more likely to cock up. So seriously, the other driver was some fool. I was just finishing my rant when I noticed a middle age man walking behind me, with his head down. I scuttled off to the side of my car while he got into the car parked in front of me and drove away. My husband was mortified.

bannerman2005

Did a few practice routes last night. Really not a great evening at all in the car. Multiple stalls at one set of lights really stressed me out and put me off for remainder of the route. Turn about and reverse around a corner seemed to be ok. Hoping another hour in the car this evening will yield better results. Thankfully any of the people stuck behind me at the lights didn't beep horns or get too annoyed. Need to get that bad drive out of the system.

leelee77

I need to get back out again. Haven't been out and about for over a week. I am hoping once the kids get back to school it will be easier.

Wanderer41

I'm 20 and find this thread good to read. Reassures me that I'm not the only person who can't drive brilliantly yet :pac: I've finished my 12 and recently got insured but I haven't driven in my town yet in my own car because I'm too afraid! I stalled a traffic lights once and that scared me but it was more that I hadn't gotten used to my own car as it's a little different to the instructor's one so I think I'm going to try a little bit more every day. I have driven two different towns which has been fine. I think I just need to gain more confidence and get more practice, unfortunately I'll be back to college soon so I'll only be able to drive at the weekends. I am just looking forward to getting my full licence and being able to drive places without panicking that I'll have to stop or something :pac:

iguana

I've noticed a real change in my driving in the last week. I'm much more confident and more able to move on from a mistake and fix it than I was up until now. And I don't have jelly legs any more after a drive in my own car. I'm just back from driving for over an hour and my legs feel fine. I even took the time to turn my car around on the drive once I came home. Normally I hop out of the car, practically kissing the ground with relief, then need to go have a loooong sit down to recover. But this time all I feel is a bit miffed that I have very little chocolate in the house.

Posy

I'm in my early 30's and want to learn to drive, but I have nobody to practice with. So many people say 'get a car so you can practice in between lessons' but there's nobody I know that could commit to that regularly.
So I'm either going to learn with no practice outside the instructor's lessons or buy a car, spend a fortune on insurance and then get very little time in it anyway! As the difference in insurance between a learner permit and full licence can be up to a grand, I'm thinking just doing lots of lessons might be better in the long run. I'm so conflicted... and also terrified at the prospect of being behind a wheel.

stinkle

Definitely get a few lessons to get familiar. I don't have a car either, but was able to practise a little bit using a car share that my OH uses (I'm out of Ireland, not sure it it's a thing there...or even if I should have been doing that). The first few weeks of just lessons were fine for me, but I did start to feel the need for practise further on - stuff like I kept making the same silly mistakes in lessons that a bit of repetition would have ironed out in the meantime, and overthinking even the slightest shudder if I hit the brakes. i just wasn't comfortable with the "feel" of the car cos I was only in it once a week.

One day we just went to an industrial area at a quiet time and I had a whale of a time just moving the car around to get a feel for certain manoevres that I just didnt have time for in the lessons cos we were straight out onto the road each time. Nothing crazy, just I was previously v gentle with the steering wheel so it was useful just to see how much control I had over the car. That was when it started to click for me.

I did 13 lessons, sat test and failed, then sat it again a few days later and passed. I think I only started practising properly after about 6 lessons. Prior to that I was too afraid to go near traffic in a non-learner car and was anxious about every little thing. Still am to an extent!!!

iguana

You could book lessons in between your EDT lessons, so that way you could get your practice in before advancing. Yes it's expensive but it is cheaper and more practical than having a car sitting on your drive that you can't use as you have no-one to drive with.

bannerman2005

went out for an hour of a practice run last night. Much better all round in the car. Got overtaken in a 50kph zone while doing approx 45kph and then the car that overtook had to break like mad to get back under as its a speed camera zone.

stinkle

bannerman2005 wrote: »

went out for an hour of a practice run last night. Much better all round in the car. Got overtaken in a 50kph zone while doing approx 45kph and then the car that overtook had to break like mad to get back under as its a speed camera zone.

That means you're doing something right when you can spot eejits doing silly stuff like that and hvaing to slow down. I was a passenger today, not even paying much attention to the road, but spotted an erratic driver and gave out about them only to see them in a minor accident further down the road.

bannerman2005

stinkle wrote: »

That means you're doing something right when you can spot eejits doing silly stuff like that and hvaing to slow down. I was a passenger today, not even paying much attention to the road, but spotted an erratic driver and gave out about them only to see them in a minor accident further down the road.

would you believe we passed a crash last night with what can only be described as joyriders. They looked to have totalled the car. There was about 5-6 cars stopped and we could see a few teenagers with cans running from the scene. 1 of them was wobbling. Only missed it by a couple of minutes.

I try to get up to the speed limit as much as possible to ensure not penalised for progression but sometimes I would be that little bit slower

stinkle

bannerman2005 wrote: »

would you believe we passed a crash last night with what can only be described as joyriders. They looked to have totalled the car. There was about 5-6 cars stopped and we could see a few teenagers with cans running from the scene. 1 of them was wobbling. Only missed it by a couple of minutes.

I try to get up to the speed limit as much as possible to ensure not penalised for progression but sometimes I would be that little bit slower

oh me too. I had a tiny bit of freeway practise (not in IE) but not much close ot my test so am a bit scared of it stilll , but did a drive with OH recently and was nailing the speed limit but overtaken so much, even in the correct lane. Then saw cops pulling people over mwah ha ha. Prev I was so fricking scared of going at speed I couldnt care less what others were at but the aul judgment does kick in eventually

Wanderer41

I think I'm getting worse :P although this morning I drove through my town which I hadn't done before as I was too scared. I went when it would be quiet so it wasn't too bad, there are some smallish hills I wouldn't like to have to stop on but I'll just have to practise. Back to college soon so I won't be able to practise much which is really annoying.

iguana

I've come up against my newest challenge. Driving and parenting. In the car last week my son got extremely upset and was roaring crying while I was driving. I was on my way for my very first petrol purchase but had to abort it as I really, really couldn't concentrate when my son cried. And today he didn't want to come home after our outing while I was anxious to get back before it turned dark as most of the journey was on country roads. Cue more crying. We managed to distract him with some music videos that my husband put on youtube and I actually found that I can sing and drive at the same time! It was actually relaxing, so much so that when my son gave out between videos I didn't freak out.

I really have to get my car radio fixed.

iguana

So today was my biggest driving day ever! My son started at a playschool which is less than 20 minutes from our house. Via the motorway. If not on the motorway, it takes 35-45 minutes depending on traffic. I drove him there, I drove home. An hour and a half later I drove to get him, I drove home. I'm wrecked. But god was there a clear improvement in my driving on the last leg. The journey has everything. City-suburban driving, busy stop-start traffic around shopping centres and industrial estates, driving past the emergency entrance to a major hospital, windy narrow country roads, going through the main road of a small town, major national roads and gazillions of roundabouts of all shapes and sizes. I'm lying in bed now and my legs still feel like they are travelling and my right calf muscles are aching.

(Though it does feel a bit infuriating that I can't drive on the motorway and halve my driving time. Is driving at 120km on a 3 lane motorway really more dangerous than driving at 100km in two way traffic, that I have to do a right-hand turn on?) It's funny, a month ago I almost stopped breathing when I drove on a dual carriageway for the first time and now I'm desperately wishing I could do a few lessons on the motorway so I'd be confident to drive on them.