Men No Longer Want to Date, Why?

pgj2015

If I was sterile I would go on dates every other night but my fear of getting someone pregnant stops me dating more. Every time I have sex I worry they will get pregnant, Im just too paranoid. I probably should get a vasectomy.

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119174174#Comment_119174174

Maybe they like sex and can still have self respect. It's a very natural thing.

Does anyone bother looking at the op account before replying to a thread? Just feeding the trolls if you don't.

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119174777#Comment_119174777

Well it's their loss if they're not giving you a chance. Once you're doing your best, what more can you do.

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119176007#Comment_119176007

That's a logical reason, apparently there's the pill for men now so you could go on that and use a condom for extra protection

riclad

Theres headlines on news websites, gen z has less sex than older generations, maybe because they spend so much time ,looking at phones ,using apps, i think it works both ways, some women use dating apps to have casual sex .or maybe they are busy looking at youtube,tik tok, online gaming

https://www.buzzfeed.com/daily/gen-z-having-less-sex-than-previous-generations

pgj2015

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119176070#Comment_119176070

That pill was made for me lol, will definitely be getting them.

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119176377#Comment_119176377

Have fun 😉

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119176142#Comment_119176142

What's sex?

gameoverdude

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119176542#Comment_119176542

They're a company that sell second hand electronics! Duh!

Been in there loads.

Potential-Monke

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119175965#Comment_119175965

Must be tough being perfect.

Donald Trump

Maybe it's just the OP?

OP, is it that you have decided that men no longer want to date you? Have you ever considered putting a bit of effort in after all those years of letting yourself go.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119175965#Comment_119175965

I suppose every cloud has a silver lining in that the fact that some of these these men don’t want to date means that no poor unfortunate may chance upon them.

Oddly enough, it's when people aren't looking to date, or meet someone, that they tend to actually meet someone worth being with. That lack of interest tends to attract women..

Anyway, this is still boards, and how posters behave/think here is likely quite different to how they are in RL.

therapist3

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119176032#Comment_119176032

Then don't give it away to everyone and make yourself a valueless slut. Enjoy it with someone that means more to you.

riclad

I think most people want to meet someone who is kind, considerate , good sense of humour , reliable, honest, also someone who can talk about more than one subject , can dress to a certain standard. People have different standards Re looks, and class, eg a female doctor may not want to go out with a man who works in Tesco. When you are not looking for someone you might meet someone. People have different taste and differences in political views , there's liberals, Conservatives, people who are woke and politically correct or people who are just somewhere in the middle . If you want to be in a relationship you need to a have certain things in common and also be attracted to each other, I don't think every woman is looking for an alpha male, since most women work and earn as much as men in many cases. I think most people want to avoid people who are rude, boring, dishonest, arrogant, self obsessed, promiscuous, or someone who drinks too much, or uses hard drugs, cocaine, I don't think most people are men or women are suited to be leaders it's just certain Jobs seem to attract men , eg tech programming, even though women can work in stem tech jobs too.

I think most women will know if they meet a nice bloke that they might be attracted to , but part of the dating process is talking to find out is this a person who i can talk to and have something in common with are they funny interesting, sexy,honest, smart. reliable etc everyone's different. Some people value physical quality's, looks over personality, character.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119168725#Comment_119168725

Some people who don't drink don't like pubs and alcohol, and don't want to be in a boozy environment.

sekiro

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119164320#Comment_119164320

If anything about the OP is correct, then is it any wonder that men are disillusioned with dating and relationships when even the act of expressing a concern or calling out a potential problem is met with such a dismissive attitude?

It's kind of funny that your response to the OP kind of reinforces the idea that if men speak up about an issue that affects them then they can expect to be dismissed or shouted down. So maybe there is something to the idea that men are less willing to participate in a society that doesn't really want to hear any of their concerns.

Not to say that men's concerns deserve to be heard ahead of women's, they should probably be given equal consideration, but to just dismiss them entirely and so easily? That doesn't seem right.

ancapailldorcha

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119177518#Comment_119177518

I spent years reading about men's rights, following groups and posting on forums about it. I know what it is more than most. All it has an interest in is bashing feminism. That's it. If men want to make change, they have to get off their backsides and make it happen just like people from any other background.

Mike Murdock

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119177766#Comment_119177766

Is it bashing feminism? Or is it critiquing the fringe of Third and Fourth Wave Feminism?

ancapailldorcha

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119178283#Comment_119178283

Probably both. Either way, it does sod all to help actual men in real life, hence my terse remarks.

Mike Murdock

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119178295#Comment_119178295

Terse? Perhaps. But you're not wrong.

Men that complain constantly need to focus on improving their own lives, become competent and capable men, and place more emphasis on becoming well-rounded in general.

Donald Trump

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119177279#Comment_119177279

Are you telling me that the sober people don't want to hear the same sh1te story being slurred to them multiple times by the same person in succession?

You must be having a laugh

It isn't a night out until some drunk has told you multiple times how many pints they had the last week and how much craic it was - so much so that they can't even remember it

ancapailldorcha

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119178366#Comment_119178366

To get back to the OP, I think the dating scene is quite grim. I've joined a few meetup groups, tried to sign up to speeddating events which 100% of the time get postponed and tried to spend more time outside in general and zip. Nada.

I have the same relationship with pubs that I have with religion. I like the buildings and the cultural aspects but actually partaking is not for me.

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119177156#Comment_119177156

Instead of making a rational point you're just showing how judgemental you are. I can see what you say is prob based on your own morales, I get that. But once people are being respectful, using safe contraception and consent is given, then they can do what they want.

amacca

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119177138#Comment_119177138

I know what you mean ..... I couldn't get a look in when I was desperate now I'm suddenly attractive when I couldn't give two continentals.....life is strange and doesn't fit my timetable that's for sure...........like when you are most self conscious and want to fit your body decides to **** with you and cover you in acne........

You can take that lack of interest too far though, I really mean Im caring less and less, think Im confirmed singleton for life the more time goes by😁

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119177279#Comment_119177279

Some people who do drink feel exactly the same. I really don't like the Irish pub setup, with the loud music, and cramped surroundings.. I still go out because that's what it's like in most of Ireland. It is what it is. You put up with small things, so that you can enjoy something else.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119178340#Comment_119178340

Sure he is. Wrong, that is. I'd quote him directly and send my objections to him but he never responds to my posts. So, I'll direct them at you. 😂

Men who complain constantly are following the model towards "equality" that worked. ie, feminism. And they're applying that model in a very different period than when feminism gained it's momentum, but they have little choice in the matter.

Think about the culture that men have to deal with. Short attention spans, "sensitive" people, woke and PC nonsense ongoing for decades, the victimhood mentality, and the extremely strong positioning of feminism in society..... which tends to react strongly to any threats from male rights groups. After all, if men are getting more rights then that must be taking attention and influence away from women. And then there are all the other causes, and minority groups all crying out for attention, along with just the background noise of people's opinions.

So, they (men) need to talk loudly and constantly, to keep some attention on their cause, because if they stop for a second, it'll be forgotten by those around them. Short attention spans. Other problems competing. etc.

Oh, and the complaining by male rights groups has sought to raise awareness over the double standards and bias within Western societies.. and it has succeeded somewhat. Time will tell if they manage anything more substantial.

Men that complain constantly need to focus on improving their own lives, become competent and capable men, and place more emphasis on becoming well-rounded in general.

So... the minority of the overall male population who seek to improve the lot of the overall male population should stop trying to change society, and instead, focus on themselves. Except, of course, many of the issues these men are concerned with are directly related to them. ie. legal considerations which are biased or discriminatory.

These men spend their time and energy to better the situation for all men... and I'm grateful that they're willing to do it. Because without them, society leans more and more towards female centric rights/protections, and little real consideration towards equality.

Why get into serious dating though?

( Im married BTW- only taking from friends at sports etc who are younger)

There seems to be no end of available hook ups, one lad from rugby showed us, messaged a young one, asked to hook up, sent a group chat 1 hour later that they we heading back to his!!

Lots of issues, people want wider friend groups, career etc.

EmmetSpiceland

Where, exactly, are men less equal to women? Is it just access to kids after a divorce and paternity leave? Is that it?

You’d have to imagine that if men’s rights “groups” keep pushing towards equality with women, on such things, that they’ll end up losing a lot more than they gain.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119178731#Comment_119178731

Why did you get married?

At some point, casual sex becomes boring, and incredibly superficial. Some people can keep it going longer than others, but most people eventually want a relationship. Some intimacy and trust as part of the sex... after all, truly great sex comes from time spent exploring and experimenting together. But apart from the sex element, there's the aspect of having someone to talk to, to have dinner with, etc. Not a friend. Not a random hookup. etc.

I'm usually very happy/content being single.. but sometimes I meet someone special and want to stay with them. Constantly moving around gets tiresome, and the lack of trust is a bit of an issue, especially as you get older.