Carbonara sauce is a scam

fonecrusher1

conan_XR wrote: »

What's the best bread to use for your carbonara sandwiches?

I use a standard french roll, just shove as much carbonara into it as possible, ketchup and mayo down the length of the opening and have it with cheese and onion crisps.

Cordell wrote: »

Wrap it like a carbonara buritto.

Both intriguing variations on the classic cream and mushroom no egg carbonara.

Might I suggest once you have assembled your roll / buritto deep fry it in good quality lard. Leave it to harden for at least 5 minutes and serve with Laughing cow cheese triangles. Trust me any Italians at your dinner party will give you that look of approval.

For desert serve authentic Italian HB Viennette ice cream.

Chow bella lancia delta integrale!

Cordell

I think we have a winner here - the pinnacle of fine italian fusion cuisine, deep fried carbonara burrito.



Seriously now, there are humans that actually do it: https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/221296/carbonara-quesadillas/

46 Long

partyguinness wrote: »

You still don't get it do you. I will spell it out one last time. It's about knowing what you are eating and what goes into your food. If you want to pluck jars off the shelf containing all sorts of extraneous thickening agents and opaque 'flavourings' go right ahead.

It literally tells you on the side of the jar what the ingredients are, the proportions, calories and other nutritional information. There is nothing in the ingredients list you posted that would not be found in a well stocked kitchen.

partyguinness wrote: »

Have you not heard of mascarpone..too exotic for you I guess. It is a type of Italian soft cheese.

I've heard of it. You've heard of it. Your grandmother would not have heard of it. And you're supposedly opposed to eating anything Grandma Partyguinness wouldn't have recognized.

partyguinness wrote: »

- 'Easi Singles'- If I didn't know better I would assume you were about 12 and writing from 1987

I don't eat Easi Singles. If you'd read the thread you'd realise this.

partyguinness wrote: »

- Frozen mash
- Microwaveable pouches of baby potatoes

There is little to no difference between the nutritional content of frozen vs fresh vegetables, potatoes included.

I'm not sure what your objection to microwaves is, but it doesn't surprise me given your bizarre list of phobias and (inconsistent) orthorexia. Like, you want to avoid 'processed' foods but you're cooking with tinned tomatoes rather than fresh. You avoid 'thickening agents' like flour/xanthan gum/corn flour because they contain 'empty calories' (Xanthan doesn't actually contain any calories) but yet you add sugar to your pasta sauce.

Porklife

I was in an Italian restaurant tonight and asked the waiter for extra cream in my carbonara. He raised an eyebrow and told me there's no cream in carbonara. My jaw hit the floor. I realised it couldn't be an authentic Italian restaurant so took my business elsewhere. Weird cos he was definitely Italian and I caught a glimpse of the chef who looked like Pavarotti. So surprised they don't know how to make a simple carbonara.

fonecrusher1

Porklife wrote: »

I was in an Italian restaurant tonight and asked the waiter for extra cream in my carbonara. He raised an eyebrow and told me there's no cream in carbonara. My jaw hit the floor. I realised it couldn't be an authentic Italian restaurant so took my business elsewhere

You did the right thing in storming out. Disgraceful. Any "Italian" restaurant that doesn't do a classic deep fried extra cream and mushroom carbonara burrito with sweet chilli mayo and cheese n onion hunky dorys on the side is taking the piss.

Whats with this new-fangled egg yoke carbonara BS. :rolleyes:

COVID

fonecrusher1 wrote: »

You did the right thing in storming out. Disgraceful. Any "Italian" restaurant that doesn't do a classic deep fried extra cream and mushroom carbonara burrito with sweet chilli mayo and cheese n onion hunky dorys on the side is taking the piss.

Whats with this new-fangled egg yoke carbonara BS. :rolleyes:

Uovo alla carbonara???...Uovo my dead body!

partyguinness

46 Long wrote: »

It literally tells you on the side of the jar what the ingredients are, the proportions, calories and other nutritional information. There is nothing in the ingredients list you posted that would not be found in a well stocked kitchen.

So you regard xanthan gum and modified maize starch as standard ingredients in a well stocked kitchen? That is not likely.

The point which is blatantly obvious to everyone else is that you can make the same sauce without half the ingredients which Tesco et al use in its sauce.

46 Long wrote: »

I've heard of it. You've heard of it. Your grandmother would not have heard of it. And you're supposedly opposed to eating anything Grandma Partyguinness wouldn't have recognized.

Grandma Partyguiness has certainly heard of mascarpone. There you are again jumping to more erroneous conclusions. It's a rule of thumb rather than strict dogma.

46 Long wrote: »

I'm not sure what your objection to microwaves is, but it doesn't surprise me given your bizarre list of phobias and (inconsistent) orthorexia. Like, you want to avoid 'processed' foods but you're cooking with tinned tomatoes rather than fresh. You avoid 'thickening agents' like flour/xanthan gum/corn flour because they contain 'empty calories' (Xanthan doesn't actually contain any calories) but yet you add sugar to your pasta sauce.

Nothing wrong with a half tea spoon of sugar in a sauce that I might make once every 2-3 months. Given the choice between white flour or modified maize starch or thickening agents and half tea spoon of sugar I'll take the half tea spoon of sugar. At least that is my choice to add or not to add. That is the fundamental point that is flying over your head.

FYI...sugar is not necessarily an empty calorie. While it should be kept to an absolute minimum, it is actually used by the body whereas I have no idea how the body uses stabilisers (xanthan gum) or modified maize starch. They are not added for nutritional purposes that's for sure but rather bulking and extending the shelf life. This is not the place to spoon feed you on the topic.

Again, you seem to equate the quest to cook from scratch with a 'phobia', 'fear' and 'orthorexia'. Very strange and genuinely rather sad actually. Clearly the notion has touched a nerve with you and your own eating habits as you are determined to shoehorn in your own insecurities.

Perhaps your parents did not instil you with the best cooking habits and you grew up with overly processed convenience foods from jars as the norm. Not too late to change.

ozmo

Dacelonid wrote: »

If you want to learn to make carbonara properly, here is a brilliant (and funny) recipe

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9KthvXIFhcc

Did it this way - very nice - very simple- recommended.

46 Long

partyguinness wrote: »

So you regard xanthan gum and modified maize starch as standard ingredients in a well stocked kitchen? That is not likely.

Yes.

Modified maize starch is corn starch/corn flour. Basic thickening agent. Xanthan gum is used a lot in gluten free baking. You'll find both in any decent supermarket and in any well-stocked kitchen. They're what you use for thickening stews, casseroles, gravy etc.

partyguinness wrote: »

The point which is blatantly obvious to everyone else is that you can make the same sauce without half the ingredients which Tesco et al use in its sauce.

You can also make your pasta sauce without onions, garlic, sugar or mascarpone. What's your point?

partyguinness wrote: »

Nothing wrong with a half tea spoon of sugar in a sauce that I might make once every 2-3 months. Given the choice between white flour or modified maize starch or thickening agents and half tea spoon of sugar I'll take the half tea spoon of sugar.

Why would you take sugar over flour, cornstarch or Xanthan gum? None of them are harmful.

partyguinness wrote: »

I have no idea how the body uses stabilisers (xanthan gum) or modified maize starch.

The crux of the problem really. You have no idea what you're talking about beyond the most superficial 'don't cook with what you grandmother wouldn't recognise' and 'processed foods are really bad because reasons'

partyguinness wrote: »

They are not added for nutritional purposes that's for sure but rather bulking and extending the shelf life.

See my point above. Thickening agents thicken and and viscosity to sauces. They don't add bulk or extend shelf life. I'm not quite sure why you're failing to grasp this basic concept.

partyguinness wrote: »

Perhaps your parents did not instil you with the best cooking habits and you grew up with overly processed convenience foods from jars as the norm. Not too late to change.

I spent two years of my life working in professional kitchens. There is very little I can't cook from scratch, and more often than not I do. Your problem is that you're arguing from a place of ignorance and armed with only the most rudimentary understanding of nutrition and essentially no culinary knowledge beyond the ability to slap together a pasta bake. Text book Dunning–Kruger effect, in other words.

fonecrusher1

ozmo wrote: »

Did it this way - very nice - very simple- recommended.

Cripes he'd want to check the best before date of the cream he used, its yellow?? :rolleyes:

Alejandro68

Egg yokes , Parmesan cheese, Pancetta and water left over from pasta and a drop of olive oil for the sauce. I don't know where cream came into it but just no.

Leg End Reject

fonecrusher1 wrote: »

Cripes he'd want to check the best before date of the cream he used, its yellow?? :rolleyes:

Some people just haven't a clue. Fresh cream and guacamole are a must.

Cordell

Alejandro68 wrote: »

Egg yokes , Parmesan cheese, Pancetta and water left over from pasta and a drop of olive oil for the sauce. I don't know where cream came into it but just no.

Yokes? No thank you sir, I'd rather have cream in mine.

fonecrusher1

Cordell wrote: »

Yokes? No thank you sir, I'd rather have cream in mine.

Well cream is a traditional carbonara ingredient. The carbonara Alejandro refers to is the new contemporary version with egg yokes.

Personally stick with the classic cream carbonara and you can't go wrong.

suicide_circus

Cordell wrote: »

I think we have a winner here - the pinnacle of fine italian fusion cuisine, deep fried carbonara burrito.



Seriously now, there are humans that actually do it: https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/221296/carbonara-quesadillas/

Autentico Italiano!

partyguinness

46 Long wrote: »

Yes.

Modified maize starch is corn starch/corn flour. Basic thickening agent. Xanthan gum is used a lot in gluten free baking. You'll find both in any decent supermarket and in any well-stocked kitchen. They're what you use for thickening stews, casseroles, gravy etc.

You can also make your pasta sauce without onions, garlic, sugar or mascarpone. What's your point?

Why would you take sugar over flour, cornstarch or Xanthan gum? None of them are harmful.

The crux of the problem really. You have no idea what you're talking about beyond the most superficial 'don't cook with what you grandmother wouldn't recognise' and 'processed foods are really bad because reasons'

See my point above. Thickening agents thicken and and viscosity to sauces. They don't add bulk or extend shelf life. I'm not quite sure why you're failing to grasp this basic concept.

I spent two years of my life working in professional kitchens. There is very little I can't cook from scratch, and more often than not I do. Your problem is that you're arguing from a place of ignorance and armed with only the most rudimentary understanding of nutrition and essentially no culinary knowledge beyond the ability to slap together a pasta bake. Text book Dunning–Kruger effect, in other words.

I have repeated my point to you ad nauseum i.e. it is very easy to throw together (in this instance) a very simple pasta bake dish without having to resort to jars off the shelf which contain all manner of extraneous ingredients. There you go.

Not entirely sure why this offends you so much or why it has struck a raw nerve.That is for you to address.

I know exactly what thickening agents do but again you ignore my point- you can make the dish without the need for such products. I said that xanthan gum and modified starch do not add any nutritional value. You have not contradicted this or detailed how the body beneficially uses xanthan gum and modified starch. As we can agree it is purely for thickening and (yes it is) and extending the life shelf.

There you go, all very simple. You want to add it to your food go right ahead and knock yourslf out.

Apparently, you spent time in a professional kitchen but that can mean anything…a waiter, a dish washer, porter, and spud scrubber…so what? Having house shared with chefs in a seaside town in the past, chefs are some of the unhealthiest people I have known (and with a remarkably short life expectancy) but I do know they were horrified when anyone in the house cooked with jars and they went out of their way to show us a few basic recipes and tips but yet here you are espousing the merits of such rubbish but I guess after 2 year in a kitchen you know it all, right? *cough* Dunning–Kruger *cough*. Sorry not adding up. Try harder.

Your ability to jump from A to D to Z and take great offence based on a few terse forum posts is classic newbie territory. You will learn in time. Seriously man, let it go.

Cordell

lighten up lads, have some creamy carbonara.
*creamy with cream

fonecrusher1

Since we've established cream is the traditional main component in a carbonara how about carbonara icecream??!!!! :eek:

Cordell

https://www.cookipedia.co.uk/recipes_wiki/Carbonara_Ice_Cream_with_Mange_Tout
I'm scared.

COVID

Carbonara with Mangy Trout ice-cream, very flavoursome.

And what'll please the foodies on this thread is that there are no additives as such, save for the mangy trout.

Yummy!

COVID

Leg End Reject wrote: »

Some people just haven't a clue. Fresh cream and guacamole are a must.

Not forgetting the Billy Roll!

46 Long

partyguinness wrote: »

I have repeated my point to you ad nauseum i.e. it is very easy to throw together (in this instance) a very simple pasta bake dish without having to resort to jars off the shelf which contain all manner of extraneous ingredients. There you go.

Your sauce is full of 'extraneous ingredients'. Sugar, garlic, onions, mascarpone etc. It's a strange recipe for someone opposed to adding unnecessary ingredients to his food.

partyguinness wrote: »

I know exactly what thickening agents do but again you ignore my point- you can make the dish without the need for such products. I said that xanthan gum and modified starch do not add any nutritional value. You have not contradicted this or detailed how the body beneficially uses xanthan gum and modified starch. As we can agree it is purely for thickening and (yes it is) and extending the life shelf.

The sugar you used doesn't add any nutritional value.

And you're still - still - insisting that a thickening agent is used to extend shelf life. I mean, the clue is even in the name. How is it possible that you're failing to grasp this basic concept?

partyguinness wrote: »

Not entirely sure why this offends you so much or why it has struck a raw nerve

It's bemusement at your stubbornness and inability to process information more than anything else. Unfamiliarity with ingredients and a naïve view on nutrition I could understand, but I've already gone through everything on the list with you to explain what they are and how they're used.

partyguinness wrote: »

Yet here you are espousing the merits of such rubbish

Jarred sauces are not 'rubbish' and I'm not 'espousing the merits' of anything. They simply exist and fill a need in the market. They don't contain anything that wouldn't be found in a well-stocked kitchen and despite your repeated, ignorant (and it is ignorance - you haven't the faintest idea what you're talking about) insistence to the contrary - there are no issues with using them.

It's not my fault you haven't much grasp on how these ingredients are used and lack the ability to understand the big words on the label.

As for chefs being 'horrified' at prepared sauces/ingredients - you've clearly never seen the inside of a kitchen. Many of them are not making stock, demi-glace or soup bases from scratch.

ablelocks

leftover carbonara (with or without cream!) is only delish toasted in a wrap, with a side salad and a glass of beer.

souter

Just made some. Delicious. Butter + pasta water + cheese, why would you need cream?
(though I did transgress and serve it with meat).

fonecrusher1

souter wrote: »

Just made some. Delicious. Butter + pasta water + cheese, why would you need cream?
(though I did transgress and serve it with meat).

Myself and a few of my colleagues at the Carbonara Regulatory Embassy of Accepted Menu's (doesn't make sense but go with it) have reached a decision that cream is a vital and traditional ingredient in a classic old style cream,mushroom, billy Roll carbonara.

You can appeal this decision when the review board meets again. 1200 years from now.

Good day sir ....

I said good day!:mad:

Porklife

fonecrusher1 wrote: »

Myself and a few of my colleagues at the Carbonara Regulatory Embassy of Accepted Menu's (doesn't make sense but go with it) have reached a decision that cream is a vital and traditional ingredient in a classic old style cream,mushroom, billy Roll carbonara.

You can appeal this decision when the review board meets again. 1200 years from now.

Good day sir ....

I said good day!:mad:

Fonecrusher, with utmost respect and as a fellow member of C.R.E.A.M may I just say that guacamole is also an acceptable albeit not obligatory ingredient in the traditional creamy recipe.

Cordell

souter wrote: »

Just made some. Delicious. Butter + pasta water + cheese, why would you need cream?
(though I did transgress and serve it with meat).

You made mac and cheese.

fonecrusher1

Porklife wrote: »

Fonecrusher, with utmost respect and as a fellow member of C.R.E.A.M may I just say that guacamole is also an acceptable albeit not obligatory ingredient in the traditional creamy recipe.

Apologies for my omission. Yes of course guacamole (made with potatoes, cabbage, carrot, turnip, salad cream) is one of the pillars of the classic carbonara.

New Home

gozunda wrote: »

Chst can no one get traditional recipes right these days!

It pronounced 'carbanana'. The ingredients are not hard to figure out ffs ...

Heres some I made recently...



No cream needed ..

You forgot the pineapple. Rookie mistake, that.

El Tarangu wrote: »

"Carbonara" is actually comes from the Italian "car", meaning "cream", and "bonara", which is a unit of measurement roughly equivalent to a gallon.

Better to get a second litre, just to be on the safe side.

Le sigh. I can't believe nobody has copped on to this yet. You obviously cook the pasta in the cream. Duh.

sdanseo

New Home wrote: »

Le sigh. I can't believe nobody has copped on to this yet. You obviously cook the pasta in the cream. Duh.

Now there's a thought.