Things you just "don't get"?

2lazytogetup

2lazytogetup wrote: »

agree with the 95% hard work and 5% of catch a breath time.

Not sure it enriches the life though.I think this is just a fallacy that parents use to justify the reasoning for having children. especially when the meet their childless mates who are having a great life.

Could be like the old phrase about marriage being the triumph of hope over experience.

I also get the need to justify having kids, however i genuinely can't wait for the twists and turns of the next 18 years of raising a human being. Pretty cool project i look forward to.

dubstarr

Deleted User wrote: »

Could be like the old phrase about marriage being the triumph of hope over experience.

I also get the need to justify having kids, however i genuinely can't wait for the twists and turns of the next 18 years of raising a human being. Pretty cool project i look forward to.

I have 2 kids grown up and 2 grandkids.And you genuinely forget how funny kids are.I also have 3 younger kids and they certainly keep me on my toes.But its hard work,fun,hairpullingly frustrating but i wouldnt be without them[sometimes]:D

Widdershins

Deleted User wrote: »

Technically true that you can go anywhere but it is a LOT of extra work making sure you have spare clothes, nappies, wipes, food for baby and you, calculating the return time to be in line with the feeding of the baby. Basically you are always counting down to the next feed.

Also a lot of hassle lifting baby in and out of car seats, buggy etc.

It is kind of like trying to pee in turbulent airplane while playing whack a mole. Eventually you will get the job done but it will be hard work and will involve cleaning up a mess at some point also.

Doesnt it just become routine?

Wouldve thought feeding just comes naturally and if breastfeeding is quite a pleasant peaceful time.


Well r.e people regretting having kids, sounds like the same ones I'm thinking of in my OP. Just awkward, nit natural parents for some reason. They had them more as a lifestyle accessory.

EmmetSpiceland

Widdershins wrote: »

Doesnt it just become routine?

Wouldve thought feeding just comes naturally and if breastfeeding is quite a pleasant peaceful time.

An exhausting “routine” broken up by moments of panic, rage and hilarity. But not necessarily in that order.

While breast feeding is certainly a “pleasant peaceful” time for the guys it is anything but for the mother. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m sure it’s “rewarding”, and all that, but it sounds like an absolute nightmare.

Maybe a “mombie” will be along to shoot down my post but not everyone has the “daytime tv” experience with breast feeding.

EmmetSpiceland

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

An exhausting “routine” broken up by moments of panic, rage and hilarity. But not necessarily in that order.

While breast feeding is certainly a “pleasant peaceful” time for the guys it is anything but for the mother. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m sure it’s “rewarding”, and all that, but it sounds like an absolute nightmare.

Maybe a “mombie” will be along to shoot down my post but not everyone has the “daytime tv” experience with breast feeding.

Is it too late to change you mind at eight months? I think I've decided it's not for me after all.

Widdershins

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

An exhausting “routine” broken up by moments of panic, rage and hilarity. But not necessarily in that order.

While breast feeding is certainly a “pleasant peaceful” time for the guys it is anything but for the mother. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m sure it’s “rewarding”, and all that, but it sounds like an absolute nightmare.

Maybe a “mombie” will be along to shoot down my post but not everyone has the “daytime tv” experience with breast feeding.

I understand its different for everyone. Something can be both difficult and rewarding, thpugh.

The name seems uncalled for.

EmmetSpiceland

Widdershins wrote: »

I understand its different for everyone. Something can be both difficult and rewarding, thpugh.

The name seems uncalled for.

Apologies, wasn’t directed at you, W.

Was more about the ones who won’t hear talk mastitis, latching issues or nipple “cracking”.

The type who’s kids are speaking french and reading before they turn 3.

micar

Casey78 wrote: »

The outpouring of grief when a celebrity dies.

The only famous person dying that genuinely upset me was David Bowie.

dubstarr

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

Apologies, wasn’t directed at you, W.

Was more about the ones who won’t hear talk mastitis, latching issues or nipple “cracking”.

The type who’s kids are speaking french and reading before they turn 3.

Not everyone has trouble breastfeeding.You only hear the horror stories.I bf my 5 kids,I got mastitis on only one of them .

Millicently

People complaining that not enough is being done to get Irish people on a cruise ship full of Coronavirus back to Ireland. They are 2 people who hold Irish passports and who don't live in Ireland, let whatever country they do live in deal with them. All very vague this 'hold Irish passports'.

EmmetSpiceland

dubstarr wrote: »

Not everyone has trouble breastfeeding.You only hear the horror stories.I bf my 5 kids,I got mastitis on only one of them .

How was it for you?

dubstarr

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

How was it for you?

Like a duck to water.I loved it,no trouble with latch or sore nipples.

EmmetSpiceland

dubstarr wrote: »

Like a duck to water.I loved it,no trouble with latch or sore nipples.

The mastitis?

dubstarr

My 2nd son was a year old when i got it,so i stopped feeding him then.

whisky_galore

People who cave into demands and give smartphones to their young children.

Who is the one supposed to be in charge here?

Lia_lia

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

An exhausting “routine” broken up by moments of panic, rage and hilarity. But not necessarily in that order.

While breast feeding is certainly a “pleasant peaceful” time for the guys it is anything but for the mother. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m sure it’s “rewarding”, and all that, but it sounds like an absolute nightmare.

Maybe a “mombie” will be along to shoot down my post but not everyone has the “daytime tv” experience with breast feeding.

I’m currently breastfeeding an almost 8 month old. Yes it was hard at the start. By start I mean first 2 weeks. It was agony! But once I got latch issues sorted and my nipples healed it was great. No issues since. Pretty much forgotten about the sore nipples now. Like the sore birth, ha!

I do know it can be hard for some but it’s definitely worth trying for at least a few weeks if it’s something you’d like to do and see how it goes. And of course get help if needed.

Jim_Hodge

Why do they now advertise to add scent boosters to fabric conditioners that they already advertise as adding freshness and a pleasant scent to your wash?

Antares35

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

Apologies, wasn’t directed at you, W.

Was more about the ones who won’t hear talk mastitis, latching issues or nipple “cracking”.

The type who’s kids are speaking french and reading before they turn 3.

We've one of those in our family (not immediate family thankfully) - they refused to own a buggy, child was strapped to them 24/7. No sugar, no vaccines, no fluoridated water, home-schooled, no bedtime or routine because "children are free spirits" and no discipline or use of the word "no" because it might damage their egos. I could let all of that go since they are not my kids so it isn't my business, but the one thing I don't get is how they are so militant about breastfeeding. It's almost like a cult for the mother. All she talks about, posts about etc.

I mean, we get it breast is best etc. but motherhood is tough enough without making women feel bad about themselves because they choose not to or, for whatever reason are unable to breastfeed. I don't get how nobody has told her to mind her own business by now. I'm due my first in May and I hope to breastfeed but I certainly wont be volunteering for guilt if it doesn't work out. If she even tries to push her agenda on me I will have an answer for her!

Widdershins

I hate people inflicting their lifestyle or philosophy on ithers. I may be a mombie type myself but I wouldn't do that.

Thing I dont get: people who treat disabled people as if they are shameful, in this day and age. No excuse.

Millicently

Antares35 wrote: »

We've one of those in our family (not immediate family thankfully) - they refused to own a buggy, child was strapped to them 24/7. No sugar, no vaccines, no fluoridated water, home-schooled, no bedtime or routine because "children are free spirits" and no discipline or use of the word "no" because it might damage their egos. I could let all of that go since they are not my kids so it isn't my business, but the one thing I don't get is how they are so militant about breastfeeding. It's almost like a cult for the mother. All she talks about, posts about etc.

I mean, we get it breast is best etc. but motherhood is tough enough without making women feel bad about themselves because they choose not to or, for whatever reason are unable to breastfeed. I don't get how nobody has told her to mind her own business by now. I'm due my first in May and I hope to breastfeed but I certainly wont be volunteering for guilt if it doesn't work out. If she even tries to push her agenda on me I will have an answer for her!

Just smile to yourself and think about the coming times when Mummy and Daddy's little darling turns into their little effing psycho nightmare. Kids need boundaries. Kids who've grown up with no boundaries, no discipline and no formal education are going to be utter psychos with no idea how to interact with people.

Tell me how

Antares35 wrote: »

I mean, we get it breast is best etc. but motherhood is tough enough without making women feel bad about themselves because they choose not to or, for whatever reason are unable to breastfeed. I don't get how nobody has told her to mind her own business by now. I'm due my first in May and I hope to breastfeed but I certainly wont be volunteering for guilt if it doesn't work out. If she even tries to push her agenda on me I will have an answer for her!

Millicently wrote: »

Just smile to yourself and think about the coming times when Mummy and Daddy's little darling turns into their little effing psycho nightmare. Kids need boundaries. Kids who've grown up with no boundaries, no discipline and no formal education are going to be utter psychos with no idea how to interact with people.

Newton's third law is: For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.

For every parent pushing breast feeding, there seems to be one pushing how they won't be pushed. It all seems very....pushy.

Antares35

Tell me how wrote: »

Newton's third law is: For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.

For every parent pushing breast feeding, there seems to be one pushing how they won't be pushed. It all seems very....pushy.

Except the ones pushing breastfeeding are bombarding mothers with constant messages that formula feeding is somehow doing your child a disservice and that you are not being as good a parent as you can be by choosing (or indeed having no choice as is the case sometimes) to formula feed. Those who refuse to buy into this are not "pushing formula feeding" - they are simply refusing to be bullied. Not remotely the same thing.

the purple tin

I still can't work out why that dingbat Prince Andrew was allowed to do that interview and show people what a lying creep he is.

Does he not have a handler or adviser, assistant whatever to tell him what a bad idea it was?
Or did he just overrule them and bull on with it?

razorblunt

the purple tin wrote: »

I still can't work out why that dingbat Prince Andrew was allowed to do that interview and show people what a lying creep he is.

Does he not have a handler or adviser, assistant whatever to tell him what a bad idea it was?
Or did he just overrule them and bull on with it?

In a way you can understand why, with Trump and the Tories just knowingly brazing things out he probably thought he'd get away with it.

the purple tin

razorblunt wrote: »

In a way you can understand why, with Trump and the Tories just knowingly brazing things out he probably thought he'd get away with it.

And dug himself deeper into the caca.
It's actually a good thing I suppose, now we all know what a creep he is.
-He was incapable of sweating because somebody shot at him in the Falklands


-He never went out dancing or partying because he wasn't a 'party person', his nickname at the time was 'The Party Prince' ffs.


I also don't understand why the royals are publically celebrating his 60th, throw him out on his ear.

Tell me how

Antares35 wrote: »

Except the ones pushing breastfeeding are bombarding mothers with constant messages that formula feeding is somehow doing your child a disservice and that you are not being as good a parent as you can be by choosing (or indeed having no choice as is the case sometimes) to formula feed. Those who refuse to buy into this are not "pushing formula feeding" - they are simply refusing to be bullied. Not remotely the same thing.

Well, my sister wanted to breast feed her for her first. She did this and was v tired when doing so. Her sister in law kept reminding her how much easier it would be if she went with bottle feed.
When my sister became pregnant with her second, she was asked had she learned her lesson from previously.

Still think it isn't the same thing?

Millicently

Antares35 wrote: »

Except the ones pushing breastfeeding are bombarding mothers with constant messages that formula feeding is somehow doing your child a disservice and that you are not being as good a parent as you can be by choosing (or indeed having no choice as is the case sometimes) to formula feed. Those who refuse to buy into this are not "pushing formula feeding" - they are simply refusing to be bullied. Not remotely the same thing.

I don't have kids but I look at all the bombardment of women and it just looks like it adds so much unnecessary pressure onto women. I think women were fed a lie that they could have it all, the kids the career the body the marriage and it would all be wonderful, but the reality is that the women pushing that myth usually have staff who take care of most of that stuff for them. Some Mums breastfeed some don't, women shouldn't be pressured one way or the other. It can seem a bit militant at times. Most Mums are just muddling their way through motherhood doing the best that they can, just as women have done since women first started having babies.

Antares35

Tell me how wrote: »

Well, my sister wanted to breast feed her for her first. She did this and was v tired when doing so. Her sister in law kept reminding her how much easier it would be if she went with bottle feed.
When my sister became pregnant with her second, she was asked had she learned her lesson from previously.

Still think it isn't the same thing?

It sounds like her sister in law is very ignorant but yes I still think it isn't the same thing, since one piece of anecdotal evidence does not erode the sheer and undeniable ever present pressure on mothers to breastfeed.

Antares35

Millicently wrote: »

I don't have kids but I look at all the bombardment of women and it just looks like it adds so much unnecessary pressure onto women. I think women were fed a lie that they could have it all, the kids the career the body the marriage and it would all be wonderful, but the reality is that the women pushing that myth usually have staff who take care of most of that stuff for them. Some Mums breastfeed some don't, women shouldn't be pressured one way or the other. It can seem a bit militant at times. Most Mums are just muddling their way through motherhood doing the best that they can, just as women have done since women first started having babies.

Exactly. The advent of the internet also doesnt help. I feel bombarded much of the time and when anyone asks me my birth plan I simply say "a healthy outcome for us both" my consultant told me to read the what to expect book and avoid the internet lol

whisky_galore

whisky_galore wrote: »

Binge drinking, read your own post.

They went too far with the definition of that years ago and rendered it meaningless now. Nobody pays attention to it any more, nor should they. Well, nobody apart from the few who watched too many US teen dramas in their day.