What's the craic (pun intended) with anal sex?

Porklife

Morning folks,

As this is AH, I'm expecting a plethora of vulgar answers but I'm genuinely wondering, what's the story with men and anal sex? Every guy I've been with over the last few years has asked for it. I can't think of a single guy who hasn't asked me if I'm up for it. Nothing at all wrong with that, I have done it in the right circumstances when the mood has taken over but I definitely don't enjoy it. I'm just wondering why men like it so much. I think the.. for want of a better word, normal way, is much nicer. Is it because its a bit taboo (or is it even?), is it because it shows the girl has a dirty side? Also.. And this hugely worries me, are you put off by a girl who does it? Do you judge her in some maybe even subconscious way?

Sorry to be so vulgar at breakfast time on a lovely Christmas Saturday folks but I have my reasons for asking 😉😑😜

Kevwoody

Apt username!

Timberrrrrrrr

Next time a man broaches the subject say yes.

Go into your bedroom, whip out a big auld 12" rubber dildo and say

"But you first"

I bet the conversation gets dropped quite quickley

Porklife

Ramsi wrote: »

I imagine they get off on dominating and inflicting pain on the girl.

You really think that's what it is? Surely loving couples do it and the guy doesn't want to hurt his girl?

zapitastas

Porn has normalised it and so seems like the thing to do

Avatar MIA

Every hole's a goal!

Avatar MIA

Porklife wrote: »

You really think that's what it is? Surely loving couples do it and the guy doesn't want to hurt his girl?

It's not, but there's a sexuality forum you can join to get more considered responses.

Cee-Jay-Cee

It’s guaranteed to be a tight fit unlike the other option which can get a bit loose with overuse.

Pauliedragon

Porklife wrote: »

Morning folks,

As this is AH, I'm expecting a plethora of vulgar answers but I'm genuinely wondering, what's the story with men and anal sex? Every guy I've been with over the last few years has asked for it. I can't think of a single guy who hasn't asked me if I'm up for it. Nothing at all wrong with that, I have done it in the right circumstances when the mood has taken over but I definitely don't enjoy it. I'm just wondering why men like it so much. I think the.. for want of a better word, normal way, is much nicer. Is it because its a bit taboo (or is it even?), is it because it shows the girl has a dirty side? Also.. And this hugely worries me, are you put off by a girl who does it? Do you judge her in some maybe even subconscious way?

Sorry to be so vulgar at breakfast time on a lovely Christmas Saturday folks but I have my reasons for asking 😉😑😜

One theory I've heard is the a hole is a lot tighter than the vagina therefore the sensation is better for the bloke's cock. Same theory went for a few blokes who go for asian women only as the rumour is they have tighter vaginas.

Avatar MIA

Cee-Jay-Cee wrote: »

It’s guaranteed to be a tight fit unlike the other option which can get a bit loose with overuse.

If by over use you mean birthing , then yes. Otherwise, not so much.

Because it's naughty

Porklife

Pauliedragon wrote: »

One theory I've heard is the a hole is a lot tighter than the vagina therefore the sensation is better for the bloke's cock. Same theory went for a few blokes who go for asian women only as the rumour is they have tighter vaginas.

Interesting. My concern is if he'll lose respect for me if I do it.

KathleenGrant

I was separated about 10 years ago and was on the dating scene for a while. 3 different men were keen to have anal sex to the point of being insistent. One had never done it and really wanted to try it. The other 2 insisted that because I had a few children sex in the normal way would not be as good for them as anal sex.

Avatar MIA

Deleted User wrote: »

Because it's naughty

AND (for the time of year) NICE

nails1

Secretly in the closet

Avatar MIA

KathleenGrant wrote: »

I was separated about 10 years ago and was on the dating scene for a while. 3 different men were keen to have anal sex to the point of being insistent. One had never done it and really wanted to try it. The other 2 insisted that because I had a few children sex in the normal way would not be as good for them as anal sex.

Insisted? That's a massive warning sign there.

Avatar MIA

nails1 wrote: »

Secretly in the closet

Yeah, especially if they're using the masculine form of your name in the process!

Franz Von Peppercorn

Porn has a lot of influence on that i’d say.

Porklife

KathleenGrant wrote: »

I was separated about 10 years ago and was on the dating scene for a while. 3 different men were keen to have anal sex to the point of being insistent. One had never done it and really wanted to try it. The other 2 insisted that because I had a few children sex in the normal way would not be as good for them as anal sex.

Hmmm, I don't have kids so it's not that for me, just seems every single guy has asked me to do it. Not a single guy that hasn't wanted to. Maybe men just love it and it feels amazing and tight

KathleenGrant

Avatar MIA wrote: »

Insisted? That's a massive warning sign there.

Well to be fair only one was really insistent. But the other 2 mentioned it every time we had sex. It was the reason I stopped seeing all 3.

Avatar MIA

Porklife wrote: »

Interesting. My concern is if he'll lose respect for me if I do it.

Possible, but only the type that would "lose respect" for you partaking in any sexual act. I.e. best avoided.

Porklife

KathleenGrant wrote: »

Well to be fair only one was really insistent. But the other 2 mentioned it every time we had sex. It was the reason I stopped seeing all 3.

I had the same experience with a guy recently, just wouldn't stop asking every time and acted pissed off when I said no so I stopped seeing him
😔

Wibbs

KathleenGrant wrote: »

The other 2 insisted that because I had a few children sex in the normal way would not be as good for them as anal sex.

Sound like small mickey syndrome to me TBH. Now granted I've only slept with three women who have had kids, but I didn't notice any difference on that score(if anything it was a little better as one could go deeper, so to speak). Of course physical trauma from birth can affect some women, but to that degree on average? The idea that more sex makes things more roomy is also nonsense in my humble. Like anything people differ in size, men and women, but the vast majority are around an average. The snuggest I ever came across(missus!!) was also a woman who had the most partners.

Porn definitely is a factor. American stuff is obsessed with bum stuff. For what reasons I'm not sure on. The "dirty" aspect must loom large in what can be a conservative culture. Plus porn has to up the ante from basic in out stuff to keep getting sales/hits. A mate of mine who's circumcised has a major thing for it and he being less sensitive means he gets more from it and reckons this is why it's more a thing for Americans as they're majority like him? Might be something to it.

I've tried the other way so to speak, but didn't particularly enjoy it TBH. Much prefer the way designed for purpose.

KathleenGrant

Porklife wrote: »

I had the same experience with a guy recently, just wouldn't stop asking every time and acted pissed off when I said no so I stopped seeing him
😔

One guy actually said my "withholding it" was a sign i may be a hostile partner in the future so I spared him from my hostility and finished it there and then.

Bullocks

Porklife wrote: »

KathleenGrant wrote: »

Well to be fair only one was really insistent. But the other 2 mentioned it every time we had sex. It was the reason I stopped seeing all 3.

I had the same experience with a guy recently, just wouldn't stop asking every time and acted pissed off when I said no so I stopped seeing him
😔

What kind of dicks keep asking??? Definitely worth pulling out the dildo to give to him first refusal for anal

KathleenGrant

Bullocks wrote: »

What kind of dicks keep asking??? Definitely worth pulling out the dildo to give to him first refusal for anal

That would be funny.

Wheety

I'd also say it's because of porn. Changes young lads perception of sex. Categories devoted to anal on every porn site. Young men (and women) have much easier access to hard core porn than any other generation before. They get used to normal sex porn and seek something different to get their kicks. That then translates to real life.

Wibbs

Fear of pregnancy might plug into it? Up the bum, no harm done and all that. I have known a couple of women who actually preferred it and got off on it more. They told me they felt much more, which had me asking how little did they feel from the normal avenue Mind you women can be extremely variable on what revs them up. Men are more straightforward that way.

Avatar MIA

KathleenGrant wrote: »

One guy actually said my "withholding it" was a sign i may be a hostile partner in the future so I spared him from my hostility and finished it there and then.

KathleenNoGrant

KathleenGrant

Avatar MIA wrote: »

KathleenNoGrant

Avatar MIA

Wibbs wrote: »

Fear of pregnancy might plug into it? Up the bum, no harm done and all that. I have known a couple of women who actually preferred it and got off on it more. They told me they felt much more, which had me asking how little did they feel from the normal avenue Mind you women can be extremely variable on what revs them up. Men are more straightforward that way.

A lot of prep required too to ensure it's a pleasing experience.

Homer

90% tighter.. 10% warmer

arybvtcw0eolkf

KathleenGrant wrote: »

I was separated about 10 years ago and was on the dating scene for a while. 3 different men were keen to have anal sex to the point of being insistent. One had never done it and really wanted to try it. The other 2 insisted that because I had a few children sex in the normal way would not be as good for them as anal sex.

You just weren't arsed?

Wibbs

Avatar MIA wrote: »

A lot of prep required too to ensure it's a pleasing experience.

Aye, though one of the women I knew who was into it was well practiced and so was "easy" for her. Now I far prefer the normal route(or is that root), but it's what revved her engine so game ball and it was hardly a penance for me so.. But yeah the standard way did almost nothing for her. She seemed almost insensitive to feelings there(beyond the obvious "button"). She had no kids either, or no other physical issues, just the way she was built. Whereas some women are extremely sensitive there. Varies a lot IME.

Wibbs

Wheety wrote: »

I'd also say it's because of porn. Changes young lads perception of sex. Categories devoted to anal on every porn site. Young men (and women) have much easier access to hard core porn than any other generation before. They get used to normal sex porn and seek something different to get their kicks. That then translates to real life.

+1. A few years back one woman was surprised that I wasn't into the whole facial thing. She didn't like it but assumed men really did, again from porn and previous guys who wanted it, again from porn.

PARlance

I fear for society's holes with all this porn.

Porklife

Wibbs wrote: »

Sound like small mickey syndrome to me TBH. Now granted I've only slept with three women who have had kids, but I didn't notice any difference on that score(if anything it was a little better as one could go deeper, so to speak). Of course physical trauma from birth can affect some women, but to that degree on average? The idea that more sex makes things more roomy is also nonsense in my humble. Like anything people differ in size, men and women, but the vast majority are around an average. The snuggest I ever came across(missus!!) was also a woman who had the most partners.

Porn definitely is a factor. American stuff is obsessed with bum stuff. For what reasons I'm not sure on. The "dirty" aspect must loom large in what can be a conservative culture. Plus porn has to up the ante from basic in out stuff to keep getting sales/hits. A mate of mine who's circumcised has a major thing for it and he being less sensitive means he gets more from it and reckons this is why it's more a thing for Americans as they're majority like him? Might be something to it.

I've tried the other way so to speak, but didn't particularly enjoy it TBH. Much prefer the way designed for purpose.

Your post makes perfect sense. Where do you stand on the losing respect side of things? This guy isn't being pushy at all but I know he wants to and he's very well endowed so I'm a little bit scared but my main worry is that he'll look at me differently afterwards, even subconsciously. What do you think about that?

Gimme A Pound

Porklife wrote: »

Interesting. My concern is if he'll lose respect for me if I do it.

If he loses respect for you for doing something HE wants... say bye bye.

Also I don't think it's a good idea to be doing it if you don't enjoy it. I know when you're in a relationship you make compromises, but a casual encounter or just dating? Really not ideal. Don't seek approval so much.

Porklife

Porklife wrote: »

Interesting. My concern is if he'll lose respect for me if I do it.

Very old fashioned view by you.
Maybe you treat sex like something you give to him?
Maybe you should just relax & enjoy it

Gimme A Pound

Wibbs wrote: »

+1. A few years back one woman was surprised that I wasn't into the whole facial thing. She didn't like it but assumed men really did, again from porn and previous guys who wanted it, again from porn.

Horrible. Really hate that kinda porn.

Porklife

KathleenGrant wrote: »

One guy actually said my "withholding it" was a sign i may be a hostile partner in the future so I spared him from my hostility and finished it there and then.

Bahahaha.... Oohh you're so hostile not letting me shove my dick up your arse. Wonder how 'hostile' he'd be roles reserved. What a manipulative (albeit so transparent) loser. You're well rid lady!

Avatar MIA

Wibbs wrote: »

+1. A few years back one woman was surprised that I wasn't into the whole facial thing. She didn't like it but assumed men really did, again from porn and previous guys who wanted it, again from porn.

Jesus, how does that even come up in conversation?

Having a nice meal, some polite conversation, having a mutual jibe about that idiot Trump.

You walk her back to her apartment, holding hands.

You get invited for coffee.

There's some awkward fumbling with clothes.

Things start to get heavy.

And then the guy says, "okay if I cum on your face?"

Strange.

Wibbs

Porklife wrote: »

Your post makes perfect sense. Where do you stand on the losing respect side of things? This guy isn't being pushy at all but I know he wants to and he's very well endowed so I'm a little bit scared but my main worry is that he'll look at me differently afterwards, even subconsciously. What do you think about that?

There's always some give and take, but jaysus if a guy loses respect for you for doing something he's requesting then he's not much use to you.

Porklife

Avatar MIA wrote: »

Jesus, how does that even come up in conversation?

Having a nice meal, some polite conversation, having a mutual jibe about that idiot Trump.

You walk her back to her apartment, holding hands.

You get invited for coffee.

There's some awkward fumbling with clothes.

Things start to get heavy.

And then the guy says, "okay if I cum on your face?"

Strange.

That has literally happened to me!

Avatar MIA

Porklife wrote: »

That has literally happened to me!

Answer. Do you think your mammy allowed your daddy to do that?

There'll be no sex of any kind mind, he'll likely whimper out the door :pac:

Wibbs

Avatar MIA wrote: »

Jesus, how does that even come up in conversation?

Having a nice meal, some polite conversation, having a mutual jibe about that idiot Trump.

You walk her back to her apartment, holding hands.

You get invited for coffee.

There's some awkward fumbling with clothes.

Things start to get heavy.

And then the guy says, "okay if I cum on your face?"

Strange.

I dunno Av, I'm not a woman, or a gay fella, so... From what I gather from women mates it's not usually kicking off on the first fumble, this kinda thing comes up(missus!!) when more comfort has been built later on. And some of the stuff mates of mine have told me... Like one she was going with this guy for a few months and was all normal in the bedroom dept, even vanilla, then one evening they were in the shower together - as you do, save water and that - and he asked her to pee on him and he'd pee on her. That this was his big turn on. Nekkid women do it for me, but each to their own I suppose. And that wasn't the oddest out of the blue request. Some were well dodgy like overly aggressive sex stuff. Though I've had that from one or two women who wanted me to get get physical in a way far outa my comfort zone. There's nought as queer as folk.

Wibbs

Avatar MIA wrote: »

Answer. Do you think your mammy allowed your daddy to do that?

If he comes back with "yeah and I used to fiddle with meself watching through a keyhole". RUN!

Avatar MIA

Wibbs wrote: »

If he comes back with "yeah and I used to fiddle with meself watching through a keyhole". RUN!

"Ah, that explains it. Fire away so". :pac:

Franz Von Peppercorn

bubblypop wrote: »

Very old fashioned view by you.
Maybe you treat sex like something you give to him?
Maybe you should just relax & enjoy it

She doesn’t really want to do it.

Porklife

You wouldn't believe some of the stuff I've had guys say to me or try to do and I'm very open minded. I was recently on a date with a guy... a first date may I add, and he went to go for a cigarette. I was sitting at the bar and before he went he goes.. Oh, this will keep you company while I'm gone. He hands me his phone (weird as we'd only just met) and shows me a video of a woman, spreadeagle being licked out by a dog! I was stunned!!! Needless to say, we didn't go home and do it doggy style!

Wibbs

Porklife wrote: »

You wouldn't believe some of the stuff I've had guys say to me or try to do and I'm very open minded. I was recently on a date with a guy... a first date may I add, and he went to go for a cigarette. I was sitting at the bar and before he went he goes.. Oh, this will keep you company while I'm gone. He hands me his phone (weird as we'd only just met) and shows me a video of a woman, spreadeagle being licked out by a dog! I was stunned!!! Needless to say, we didn't go home and do it doggy style!

What the actual f... :eek:

A couple of things occur to me with someone like that, foremost among them if its coming from someone who's not a teenager is that maybe this has worked for them in the past? Which is another level of weird. Or he's just a weirdo.