Weddings - a terrible day out.

c68zapdsm5i1ru

erica74 wrote: »

But in that scenario there was no mention that either hypothetical person didn't want to attend. If you're friends with someone and want to go to their wedding, then go

You make it sound so simple, but it's not always that easy. Sometimes you don't want to go, but it's simpler to just swallow and get it over with than put up with hurt feelings or awkwardness or whatever.

Graces7

Meadow Freezing Newsman wrote: »

I know people involved in the Church and believe me, they would far prefer if couples to whom the sacrament is meaningless didn't partake in it, just using the Church as a pretty and traditional back drop for their 'big day'. The donation goes towards the upkeep of the church, cleaning it, maintaining the organ and the red carpet, heating the church if it's Winter and so on. It's not a profit making exercise.

Thank you for this truth.

Also if you get married in Church you need to attend instruction.

Fred Swanson

This post has been deleted.

beertons

I much prefer funerals to weddings.

erica74

Meadow Freezing Newsman wrote: »

You make it sound so simple, but it's not always that easy. Sometimes you don't want to go, but it's simpler to just swallow and get it over with than put up with hurt feelings or awkwardness or whatever.

It is that simple. There's a whole thread here of people pissed off at having to attend weddings that they didn't want to go to in the first place, just don't go and save yourselves and the couple the money and time and move on.
If you have ever not attended a wedding for any reason, if a friendship or relationship has fallen apart because of it, you're better off without those people in your life anyway.

Mackerel and Avocado Sandwich

....... wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

Kiwi, Aussie, British, American... they're pretty much all binge drinking events in the English speaking world. You have to binge drink to get through it ffs.

.......

This post has been deleted.

LirW

Mackerel and Avocado Sandwich wrote: »

Kiwi, Aussie, British, American... they're pretty much all binge drinking events in the English speaking world. You have to binge drink to get through it ffs.

It's bringe drinking everywhere, in a lot of countries you just don't have to spend 20 grand on it :pac:

_Dara_

erica74 wrote: »

You don't "have to" though.

You kinda do in some cases. If you didn't go to a close friend's wedding, she'd be cool with that? Or your godchild's? Or your favourite sibling's kid's wedding?

People who say "You don't have to go" are technically right, but these kinds of things in reality can cause hurt feelings. When people say "Don't go" for any case, I wonder have they participated in the human race at all. We all know there are cases where you simply can't decline. And there is no point in pretending otherwise. It's a pat forum answer to say "Don't go". It's not rooted in reality.

Conor Bourke

beertons wrote: »

I much prefer funerals to weddings.

A good funeral is better than a bad wedding

erica74

_Dara_ wrote: »

You kinda do in some cases. If you didn't go to a close friend's wedding, she'd be cool with that? Or your godchild's? Or your favourite sibling's kid's wedding?

People who say "You don't have to go" are technically right, but these kinds of things in reality can cause hurt feelings. When people say "Don't go" for any case, I wonder have they participated in the human race at all. We all know there are cases where you simply can't decline. And there is no point in pretending otherwise. It's a pat forum answer to say "Don't go". It's not rooted in reality.

But if you want to go to all of those weddings, then go. Presumably if it was your close friend's wedding you would want to go.

Well I am living in reality and I have just not gone to different weddings down through the years and it wasn't that big a deal. The couple who are getting married really don't give a shite who turns up bar the people who they are really close to and those are all people who probably want to go anyway.

iamwhoiam

Really looking forward to one in the summer . No church , cermony in the hotel . Good fun , family and friends gathered to enjoy celebrating with the couple .

mcgiggles

I think the issue lies in people's unwillingness to realise that *god forbid* some people don't like weddings! Each to their own! But people throwing strops over people not attending their weddings is the height of selfishness. People have their own lives, things going on etc.. Noone will ever give as much of a f*ck about your wedding as you do! People need to be okay with this!! My friend got married about 6 months before me and every decline she got she was raging about! She was also one to say "well they better send a card anyways" and literally count every card and hold it against people if they didn't send a gift! *sigh*
Personally I love weddings! Yes they are an expensive weekend but I am an old fashioned romantic. But in saying that I got married a few months ago, and didn't get all ratty because people declined! No matter what relation/ relationship they have to me/my oh! Life goes on!

Fred Swanson

This post has been deleted.

theyoungchap

qwerty ui op wrote: »

You'd be surprised how little be people give a toss about what you find important. I know people who took a few hours of work and went for a stroll in the park afterwards. I know a guy who went in his work clothes. I even know a couple who completely forgot about the appointment and had to rearrange.



For the usual big weddings i'd say the exact opposite is true.




They ain't free you know.




Yeah, even those pesky weddings abroad



I'm pointing out a usual scenario how people come under pressure to go. This happens for both male and female.



So a friend spends tens of thousands of euro and 8months to organize their big day and it fine to say, " Nah! I'll give it a miss, something new out on netflix next weekend".

mcgiggles wrote: »

I think the issue lies in people's unwillingness to realise that *god forbid* some people don't like weddings! Each to their own! But people throwing strops over people not attending their weddings is the height of selfishness. People have their own lives, things going on etc.. Noone will ever give as much of a f*ck about your wedding as you do! People need to be okay with this!! My friend got married about 6 months before me and every decline she got she was raging about! She was also one to say "well they better send a card anyways" and literally count every card and hold it against people if they didn't send a gift! *sigh*
Personally I love weddings! Yes they are an expensive weekend but I am an old fashioned romantic. But in saying that I got married a few months ago, and didn't get all ratty because people declined! No matter what relation/ relationship they have to me/my oh! Life goes on!

I've never heard anybody get ratty over people not attending a wedding. Most people couldn't give a toss who attends and who doesn't.

Dakota Dan

JohnnyFlash wrote: »

Opened the letter box this morning, and discovered an invite to the wedding of my nephew and his girlfriend. Has put me in bad mood as a result. I’ll have to go, but I’d rather get a 5-fingered prostate exam than attend to be honest. Does anyone actually enjoy Irish weddings?

They take all day. They cost a fortune. The food is nearly always shîte, you end up talking to cousins and other relations you hate, the speeches are always the same, you can’t get too drunk or the extended family will be gossiping about you, you don’t know who you’ll be sitting beside, the music is terrible. Just a really bad day out. The only positive is that there’s a decent chance you’ll get the ride at the end of the night.

When will start having w mature conversation about this? No one wants to go to these dreadful affairs only Bridezilla and her bridesmaids. Fiasco.

With that attitude the only person you'd be riding at the end of the night is yourself😀

c68zapdsm5i1ru

erica74 wrote: »

It is that simple. There's a whole thread here of people pissed off at having to attend weddings that they didn't want to go to in the first place, just don't go and save yourselves and the couple the money and time and move on.
If you have ever not attended a wedding for any reason, if a friendship or relationship has fallen apart because of it, you're better off without those people in your life anyway.

It's not necessarily about friendships falling apart. It's about knowing that you might have really hurt someone's feelings, caused a bit of awkwardness for your parents or something like that. In those scenarios it's sometimes simpler to go to the wedding, than create a difficult situation.

c68zapdsm5i1ru

theyoungchap wrote: »

I've never heard anybody get ratty over people not attending a wedding. Most people couldn't give a toss who attends and who doesn't.

I have!

Zebra3

Graces7 wrote: »

Thank you for this truth.

Also if you get married in Church you need to attend instruction.

Advice on marriage. From a priest.

How appropriate. :rolleyes:

The desperation of people to have their “perfect day”.

whisky_galore

beertons wrote: »

I much prefer funerals to weddings.

Sort of like a funeral...

A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he's finished.

Dakota Dan

Meadow Freezing Newsman wrote: »

I have!

Not so Long ago it was the people that didn't get invites that got ratty over it, looks is like it's after going the opposite way now.

homerjay2005

murpho999 wrote: »

you sound very miserable.

Been to foreign weddings and I think Ireland does weddings very well , a real sense of occasion, people dress up well etc. Also, some great venues out there with some very good food offerings.

this..weddings in general are excellent in this country.

splinter65

Hate everything about Irish weddings . The pretension. The egos. The hypocrisy. The one oneupmanship. The fact that all the brides think that their wedding is different, special when in reality it is just a hodge podge of every other wedding the bride and groom went to/saw on a wedding website in the last two years.
No sincerity, crass ( the chocolate fountain, the doves, the empty chair for granny, the photo booth, the ice cream machine etc etc) it’s awful.
I do like wedding pictures funnily enough. Anyone’s, really.
My favourit of all time is George Bush juniors.
Perfect really

Billgirlylegs

theyoungchap wrote: »

I've never heard anybody get ratty over people not attending a wedding. Most people couldn't give a toss who attends and who doesn't.

"Your man's uncle Theyoungchap didn't turn up. wonder what prompted that.
The whole family seemed a bit odd if you ask me"

You have to be joking if you think no one gives a toss or notices absences.
More political intrigue than Jason Bourne could handle.

OldMrBrennan83

This post has been deleted.

facehugger99

If my safety could be guaranteed, I'd love to attend a traveler wedding.

One where there's a gigantic punch up and the venue gets smashed.

.......

This post has been deleted.

LirW

I think there is a good bit of truth to the saying "the 2 main things people will remember from a wedding is how the bride looked and the food".

.......

This post has been deleted.

LirW

....... wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

Funnily enough I do, always, everyone. I'd be the one with "ah you remember Mary's mother's best friend wearing that belt?".

But food you need to get right. Never serve the guests crap food and never let them starve. Food keeps the crowd in good spirits. It doesn't have to be fancy Michelin star stuff, nuggets, chips and some garlic bread is fine too. But never let them go hungry, that will give you angry drinkers.