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What are your favorite Marketing lies?

  • 15-12-2017 3:48pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,491 ✭✭✭


    I love these ones that crops up on car ads

    "No Nct but will fly through"

    I bet you 55 euro it won't you hoodwinker!

    "First to see will buy"

    "One careful lady owner"


«13

Comments

  • Posts: 5,121 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Space saver spare tyres.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,862 ✭✭✭mikhail


    I remember seeing a box of donuts advertised in the US as 0% trans fats. Not technically a lie, but the implication that they were a healthier choice made me chuckle.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,647 ✭✭✭✭El Weirdo




  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,367 ✭✭✭✭Sleepy


    "Diamonds are Forever." DeBoers.

    The greatest marketing campaign ever run.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 893 ✭✭✭PLL


    The five year extended warranty was €129 but I can give it to you today for €49.

    OR

    You can pay the direct debit in monthly installments. First payment today is usually €30 but I'll knock €15 off for you.

    Both Currys.

    Also the 0% finance and minimum monthly installments plan. Don't have time to explain now. Give it a Google.


    I work in finance, it's amusing to watch.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,346 ✭✭✭King George VI


    "FIVE HITS IN A ROW" - FM104 DJ in between each of the five songs to say "FIVE HITS IN A ROW" over and over again.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,413 ✭✭✭✭the beer revolu


    Electric cars : zero emissions!

    Yeah, how was the electricity produced??



    Also heard an ad on the radio for Firebird boilers.
    "complies with all existing and future regulations".
    Fair play!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,166 ✭✭✭Are Am Eye


    Drop in and speak to our friendly and knowledgeable staff!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,500 ✭✭✭✭DEFTLEFTHAND


    Guinness calling themselves 'the black stuff' when the actual colour of the product is a deep dark red.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,798 ✭✭✭Mr. Incognito


    Red bull makes you fly.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,102 ✭✭✭✭Del2005


    All the car companies offering free Road Tax when we don't have a road tax.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,431 ✭✭✭Sky King


    Miles Fuel. Up to 3% further.

    Up to.

    3 poxy percent!

    WOW WHERE DO I SIGN!??

    Stupidest marketing campaign of 2017.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,722 ✭✭✭nice_guy80


    PLL wrote: »
    The five year extended warranty was €129 but I can give it to you today for €49.

    OR

    You can pay the direct debit in monthly installments. First payment today is usually €30 but I'll knock €15 off for you.

    Both Currys.

    Also the 0% finance and minimum monthly installments plan. Don't have time to explain now. Give it a Google.


    I work in finance, it's amusing to watch.
    then cancel the DD after a day, pay it in full and you've just made €15


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 851 ✭✭✭vintagecosmos


    Non Iron, Easi Iron.

    Stainless Steel

    Scratch Resistant

    The majority of customers agree this will 100% make you look and feel better*

    *51% agreed according to our survey of 19 people.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,338 ✭✭✭NATLOR


    UNLIMITED FIBRE BROADBAND





    1TB Fair usage policy


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,576 ✭✭✭Paddy Cow


    "The customer is always right". I hope whoever came up with that is burning in hell.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 851 ✭✭✭vintagecosmos


    Satisfaction Guaranteed.

    Some chap tried to sue a dry cleaners for 67 million dollars for losing his trousers based on the Satisfaction Guaranteed sign.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pearson_v._Chung


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,828 ✭✭✭5rtytry56


    In Ireland, ANY policy warranty for home use tech gear like PC's, printers, that states

    '48 hour engineer callout'

    especially this time if year.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,977 ✭✭✭PandaPoo


    Red bull makes you fly.

    I heard somewhere they were sued for saying it gives you wings so changed it to wiiiings


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,828 ✭✭✭5rtytry56


    BLU RAY DVD






    yah.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,421 ✭✭✭major bill


    ''Your **** is our bread and Butter'' (sh1t)

    Saw that on the back of a Drainage companies Van a few years ago on the M50.

    more a logo but defo got my attention.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,172 ✭✭✭FizzleSticks


    This post has been deleted.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,231 ✭✭✭Odhinn


    I love these ones that crops up on car ads

    "No Nct but will fly through"

    I bet you 55 euro it won't you hoodwinker!

    "First to see will buy"

    "One careful lady owner"

    The 14 year olds in the pictures for skin care products in the chemist.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 555 ✭✭✭shaunr68


    Strictly speaking a customer service lie, but always guaranteed to irritate me.

    When on hold. "Your call is important to us. Please wait...."

    Not bloody well important enough to employ sufficient numbers of staff to man the phones though eh!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 118 ✭✭Plague Maiden


    This isn't a piece of marketing as such, because you only noticed it after you'd already purchased the product, but seeing 'Believe' written on the inside of the Manchester United jersey's crest used to make me gag. And I'm a Man Utd fan!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 118 ✭✭Plague Maiden


    shaunr68 wrote: »
    Strictly speaking a customer service lie, but always guaranteed to irritate me.

    When on hold. "Your call is important to us. Please wait...."

    Not bloody well important enough to employ sufficient numbers of staff to man the phones though eh!

    There's a sign in Bank of Ireland on Arran Quay that's spluttering out something about 'valued customers' etc. I was there mid-week, in a queue, with no staff members present whatsoever. I had to help an old biddy use the ATM. I'm on my lunch-break and doing voluntary work for Bank of Ireland. Valued customers is right, they're lucky to bloody have us.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,231 ✭✭✭Odhinn


    This isn't a piece of marketing as such, because you only noticed it after you'd already purchased the product, but seeing 'Believe' written on the inside of the Manchester United jersey's crest used to make me gag. And I'm a Man Utd fan!

    I remember a head going onto me about I understood nothing about Leeds FC. What's it about then, sez I? "Respect, tradition" sez he. What does that mean, sez I and he hasn't a clue.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,231 ✭✭✭Odhinn


    There's a sign in Bank of Ireland on Arran Quay that's spluttering out something about 'valued customers' etc. I was there mid-week, in a queue, with no staff members present whatsoever. I had to help an old biddy use the ATM. I'm on my lunch-break and doing voluntary work for Bank of Ireland. Valued customers is right, they're lucky to bloody have us.

    I've used BOI services at three branches. They've a school of charm all their fecking own.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 118 ✭✭Plague Maiden


    Odhinn wrote: »
    I remember a head going onto me about I understood nothing about Leeds FC. What's it about then, sez I? "Respect, tradition" sez he. What does that mean, sez I and he hasn't a clue.

    Ah sure stop, come here, go 'way.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 38,247 ✭✭✭✭Guy:Incognito


    Sleepy wrote: »
    "Diamonds are Forever." DeBoers.

    The greatest marketing campaign ever run.

    Good footballers though


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,656 ✭✭✭C14N


    "48 Hour Protection"

    I really hope nobody actually believes that one on the side of a deodorant bottle.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,656 ✭✭✭C14N


    shaunr68 wrote: »
    Strictly speaking a customer service lie, but always guaranteed to irritate me.

    When on hold. "Your call is important to us. Please wait...."

    Not bloody well important enough to employ sufficient numbers of staff to man the phones though eh!

    Similar one, "we're experiencing an unusually high volume of calls at the moment"

    If every time I call you say this, it isn't unusual. It's a usually high volume of calls, you've just understaffed your support center.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,109 ✭✭✭Oldtree


    Irish Hospital Sweep "If you're not in you can't win!" best ever imo

    http://ifiplayer.ie/irish-hospital-sweepstakes-vault-advert/


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,868 ✭✭✭✭fritzelly


    This post has been deleted.

    ...and the crap that nobody else is gonna buy


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,971 ✭✭✭_Dara_


    Sleepy wrote: »
    "Diamonds are Forever." DeBoers.

    The greatest marketing campaign ever run.

    I’m so sick of hearing about this campaign, for some reason. I think it’s because in real life, anyone who brings it up comes across so goddamn smug like they’ve never been taken in by advertising themselves when evvvveryone has. Also people who bring it up tend to do so triumphantly like nobody has ever heard about this campaign before when by now many, many people have.

    Plus, it’s not really a lie. Doesn’t mean the diamond is worth anything, and that’s where the success of the campaign lay, but it surely isn’t going anywhere, hence it’s “forever”.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,636 ✭✭✭feargale


    The most awful piece of advertising is the ones you get in radio these days extolling some product ( fair enough ) and then adding the caveats, spoken at such a speed that nobody could possibly comprehend the message. This is utterly dishonest and I am astonished that nobody to my knowledge has ever challenged it in law. I don't believe that any court could allow a firm to rely on such mumbo jumbo.


  • Posts: 31,118 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    fritzelly wrote: »
    ...and the crap that nobody else is gonna buy
    The classic end of lines stuff, only sizes left are for the whales & sticks.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 882 ✭✭✭JohnFalstaff


    Back again, "New and improved"
    We return to our irregularly programmed schedule
    Hidden cleverly between heavy breasted
    Beer and car commercials
    CNNESPNABCTNT but mostly B.S.
    Where oxymoronic language like
    "virtually spotless", "fresh frozen"
    "light yet filling" and "military intelligence"
    Have become standard.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,033 ✭✭✭✭Richard Hillman


    Football on television. It is remarkable how a sport where the majority of the games are bad to watch can get so many viewers.

    Tribal loyalty towards specific clubs is quite a remarkable too, not just the super clubs but the mediocre too. There are so many misery clubs that get huge attendances despite the fact that the customers know nothing good will come of the season


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,088 ✭✭✭OU812


    “Voted (insert type) product of the year”

    (By us)


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,166 ✭✭✭Are Am Eye


    _Dara_ wrote: »
    but it surely isn’t going anywhere, hence it’s “forever”.

    In 3.59 billion years time the sun will expand destroying the earth and everything on it.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,828 ✭✭✭5rtytry56


    The Duracell Bunny


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,810 ✭✭✭take everything


    Sleepy wrote: »
    "Diamonds are Forever." DeBoers.

    The greatest marketing campaign ever run.

    All I can think of is the Simpsons episode.
    DiAmonds!
    DiAmonds!


  • Posts: 16,720 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Made with 100% Irish beef!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,971 ✭✭✭_Dara_


    Are Am Eye wrote: »
    In 3.59 billion years time the sun will expand destroying the earth and everything on it.

    Hence the inverted commas around 'forever'.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,174 ✭✭✭RhubarbCrumble


    I can't find the link now, but saw a vintage car on DoneDeal last night. Car was 1936 and described as 'one owner from new'. Eh, I doubt it somehow!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 18,067 ✭✭✭✭fryup


    that Duracell batteries go and on and on and on and on and on and on.....

    (no better than your average make imo)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,828 ✭✭✭5rtytry56


    'Meet ALL the Irish "Big Guns" for --Product-- at "The Irish Expo". If you're a user, then MISS THIS AT YOUR PERIL!!'


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,422 ✭✭✭✭Bruthal


    I love these ones that crops up on car ads


    "First to see will buy"
    And the next line says "Relisted due to timewasters"


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,166 ✭✭✭Are Am Eye


    _Dara_ wrote: »
    Hence the inverted commas around 'forever'.

    But you have no commas around
    plus, it's not really a lie


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