Letting family members using my computer- am I in the wrong?

Young Northern Man

CaraMay wrote: »

No it's because you don't appreciate that you live at home.

I certainly do appreciate living at home.

It would a major hassle moving out.

Big Bag of Chips

Have you any friends who also live at home? Could you get together and find somewhere to move to? Moving straight from home to buying your own place isn't easy, and with the changes in house prices, mortgage applications etc its very different to when your parents were buying, and even to when your sister was buying.

Renting these days seems to be a safer bet than taking out a huge mortgage on a property and finding out down the line that the property is worth a lot less than you still owe for it . Renting has less risk attached. If something breaks or goes wrong, you call a landlord to sort it out. You don't have to pay for it yourself etc.

Renting is a good stepping stone to adult independence. Just because it's not the done thing, doesn't mean it should never be done! It will be difficult to change a mindset that has been established throughout your whole life, but it's not impossible. And no matter what you do, parents will always have an opinion and always think they know best!

I'm sorry if you feel you were attacked in the thread, but by posting on a public forum we all run the risk of hearing things we don't like. If you feel you have been specifically attacked, please report the posts and the moderators will look at them.

You came looking for advice, I hope you got some. Take care.

Teyla Emmagan

I am taking it you aren't from a 'traditional Irish background' OP. Which is fine, and possibly explains why you find concepts such as renting and not living with family odd. However, you don't seem to have any sort of plan in place for your own future. Are you going to live at home until your parents drop dead so you can get their house? Because you don't seem to have any career/career progression/plan for yourself in mind. Which is no good to you in the long run, and also explains why you don't have more friends/aren't more independent. You are in a bubble and you don't challenge yourself. In fact you seem terribly inflexible. And if you don't get a better job (either by moving, or reskilling) then nothing will ever change.

As for the laptop issue, if I were living at home, and my folks had no computer, not only would they (reasonably I think) expect to use mine, but I would feel like a right little git for begrudging them. You however seem to want everything in a way that suits your own convenience. All you can say about living at home is that "it would be a major hassle moving out". That's not really a sign of how much you appreciate all your parents have done for you, nor is the fact you want them to buy their own laptop and wouldn't consider that to be something you could do for them to show how grateful you are to them.

I think you need to overhaul your whole attitude. Also, you should put a plan in place for yourself, starting with learning to drive and developing a decent career for yourself. And quiting with the excuses.

Big Bag of Chips

Thread locked at OP's request.