Single life as a guy...

eeguy

Charizard wrote: »

Honestly I disagree with what your saying here, a first date in a bar is as basic as it comes nothing great about it. Safe is the word you are using and its the mentality that I for one am delighted is leaving these isles

Where would you suggest for a first date?

One where you can get a proper chat with someone in relaxed settings late in the evening that's not weather dependent.

Charizard

Charizard wrote: »

Honestly I disagree with what your saying here, a first date in a bar is as basic as it comes nothing great about it. Safe is the word you are using and its the mentality that I for one am delighted is leaving these isles

be careful what you wish for - both my daughters work and live abroad - Vancouver and London (before that Dubai) and while there are huge advantages and great lifestyles both of them miss the very thing you are slagging off! My daughter in London has had guys bring her on dates to the beach, on picnics, boats on lakes, the London Eye, exclusive rooftop bars in London - it still doesn't mean you have met the right person. And its almost harder to say you don't want to see the person again when they have planned a first date like that :eek::eek:

The chat, the feeling of closeness and companionship you get in Ireland in a pub, the fact that Irish people "get" the sense of humour we all have, the way of saying something half in jest, half serious! One of the things they notice a lot is that people in the countries they have lived and travelled in take everything they say literally - they don't "get" the unique Irish sense of humour and wit. And believe me its not all about drink!

Your statements are so sweeping Charizard. Nothing in the world in black and white, there are pros and cons to everything. People are entitled to an opinion based on their experiences - it doesn't mean they are wrong. I have had to learn that myself over the years. From being very critical and being on the high moral ground a lot, I have had to learn (sometimes from my kids, sometimes from travelling a lot myself) - that nothing is written in stone. Give people a chance - if not you will learn in time anyway. Life has a way of doing that to you :cool:

Mister Vain

Whenever this topic comes up it always reminds me of this clip from The Savage Eye. It's a bit exaggerated but I think there's definitely some truth to it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PaXFsHMvTWk

audi12

eeguy wrote: »

Not really.

Just that a pub is a great place to meet people and a great place for a first date.

Nice cozy surroundings, decent music and a quiet pint.

You're not stuck there like you would be for a formal meal or anot activity, so you can leave at any time depending on how the date goes.

It is hard to meet anyone these days or maybe thats just me.

Charizard

Deleted User wrote: »

Not sure what part of Ireland you grew up in ? Maybe you had negative experiences that have coloured your view of Irish experiences on dates ??
What you describe sounds like something from 20 years ago .

Neither of my daughters met their boyfriends in pubs - both of them through sports and college . Both are sports mad and so are their friends .

I don't know when I last met someone for a date in a pub and I go on a lot of dates . Usually it's coffee ! In fact I wouldn't like meeting for a drink as it kinda clouds the real person and could mean someone needs drink to be sociable ? So I prefer a dry first date and to check out someone from a sober point of view!!

Very few people I meet need drink these days to hold a conversation - in fact I meet more and more non drinkers as time goes on.

I grew up in the west but I have lived all over Ireland and been among Irish people abroad. It always revolves around drink. Like I said its changing which is a good thing, its good to hear your daughters met lads elsewhere. I think you will find what happens in Dublin is generally a few years ahead, then moves to minor cities Galway/Cork/etc
You seem to be of the age where I said men dont need drink as much to talk to women, my aul lad for example would be far more capable of talking to a stunning woman than my 17 year old nephew whos cocky as hell but still stumbles when its a pretty girleen

Charizard

eeguy wrote: »

Where would you suggest for a first date?

One where you can get a proper chat with someone in relaxed settings late in the evening that's not weather dependent.

Coffee shop has been mentioned by the previous poster for one. I dunno bowling is pretty relaxed and fun would be something Id do and you dont need good weather for it. Those two cover pretty much every age demo-graph and Im sure there is hundreds more

Charizard

Deleted User wrote: »

be careful what you wish for - both my daughters work and live abroad - Vancouver and London (before that Dubai) and while there are huge advantages and great lifestyles both of them miss the very thing you are slagging off! My daughter in London has had guys bring her on dates to the beach, on picnics, boats on lakes, the London Eye, exclusive rooftop bars in London - it still doesn't mean you have met the right person. And its almost harder to say you don't want to see the person again when they have planned a first date like that :eek::eek:

The chat, the feeling of closeness and companionship you get in Ireland in a pub, the fact that Irish people "get" the sense of humour we all have, the way of saying something half in jest, half serious! One of the things they notice a lot is that people in the countries they have lived and travelled in take everything they say literally - they don't "get" the unique Irish sense of humour and wit. And believe me its not all about drink!

Your statements are so sweeping Charizard. Nothing in the world in black and white, there are pros and cons to everything. People are entitled to an opinion based on their experiences - it doesn't mean they are wrong. I have had to learn that myself over the years. From being very critical and being on the high moral ground a lot, I have had to learn (sometimes from my kids, sometimes from travelling a lot myself) - that nothing is written in stone. Give people a chance - if not you will learn in time anyway. Life has a way of doing that to you :cool:

You see thats all very cliche, its like saying I only like Irish girls cause of the craic. Which Ive actually heard on my travels. Where is that giving people a chance for example. Your statements are quiet sweeping aswell, read back on your comment and you will see this
The part bolded for me is one of the most un true statements that Irish reel out, its akin to saying Germans are boring.
I honestly believe this is a very patronizing thing to say, Im all for giving people a chance, I just think your view is maybe from a generation before me. I have travelled, id presume more than 99% of the people in Ireland, I feel I can judge a person better than rolling out lines like "people dont get Irish sense of humour" my wife is Argentine, she gets my sense of humour as well as my fathers, brothers, friends.

Charizard

Charizard wrote: »

You see thats all very cliche, its like saying I only like Irish girls cause of the craic. Which Ive actually heard on my travels. Where is that giving people a chance for example. Your statements are quiet sweeping aswell, read back on your comment and you will see this
The part bolded for me is one of the most un true statements that Irish reel out, its akin to saying Germans are boring.
I honestly believe this is a very patronizing thing to say, Im all for giving people a chance, I just think your view is maybe from a generation before me. I have travelled, id presume more than 99% of the people in Ireland, I feel I can judge a person better than rolling out lines like "people dont get Irish sense of humour" my wife is Argentine, she gets my sense of humour as well as my fathers, brothers, friends.

Good for you ! Lots of us Irish travel these days. I have lived in New Zealand for 4 years and Vancouver for 2 - and will probably go back to Vancouver eventually if my kids settle there. Both my kids say other nationalities don't get the Irish sense of humour in the way we do. That's not a criticism - it's called an observation! Neither of them socialise in Irish pubs. They both have non Irish boyfriends.

I was in London last week and was socialising with a group of friends (ages 24-49 ) and the noticeable thing was the British take a lot of stuff seriously when the Irish in the group were saying stuff tongue in cheek, a wink and a look in the eye that Brits don't always get. It's actually very funny when it happens. Canadians are similar - they take things literally

Pretty sweeping statements to say YOU have travelled more than 99% of Irish people? I would say a lot of people would beg to differ - the vast majority of 20-30 year olds have lived or worked abroad at this stage .... Many travelling through and working in many countries along the way. My kids between them have worked in Dubai, Singapore, UK, France, Italy, NZ, Australia, Canada.

90% of their friends from college are abroad. Kinda sad for my "generation" as you put it ...3 kids before the age of 26 so believe me I am having plenty of fun now that they are grown and gone and job well done !

As you like the last work on most topics Charizard I will leave the floor open to you .....and wish you well in in your travels ! :-)

Mister Vain

From my experience its people from non English speaking countries that don't get our sense of humor. England is very similar to here. The U.S and Canada is a bit different alright but they're good craic too.

eeguy

Charizard wrote: »

Coffee shop has been mentioned by the previous poster for one. I dunno bowling is pretty relaxed and fun would be something Id do and you dont need good weather for it. Those two cover pretty much every age demo-graph and Im sure there is hundreds more

Few enough coffee shops open at 8 in the evening.

Bowling is a definite no no. First of all, you don't know if she likes bowling, second every woman I know hates the shoes. :rolleyes: third, few enough bowling alleys around that open late, especially on weekdays.
Fourth, both of you almost definitely have to travel, so you can't walk her home or stay out too late.

All things that a pub solves.

Bowling is grand for a second or third date once you've felt each other out.

Mister Vain

eeguy wrote: »

Fourth, both of you almost definitely have to travel, so you can't walk her home or stay out too late.

That could just as easily be the case in a pub if you're going on a first date with someone.

Charizard

eeguy wrote: »

Few enough coffee shops open at 8 in the evening.

Bowling is a definite no no. First of all, you don't know if she likes bowling, second every woman I know hates the shoes. :rolleyes: third, few enough bowling alleys around that open late, especially on weekdays.
Fourth, both of you almost definitely have to travel, so you can't walk her home or stay out too late.

All things that a pub solves.

Bowling is grand for a second or third date once you've felt each other out.

You see, no matter what I said you would have this reply :rolleyes:

Charizard

Deleted User wrote: »

Good for you ! Lots of us Irish travel these days. I have lived in New Zealand for 4 years and Vancouver for 2 - and will probably go back to Vancouver eventually if my kids settle there. Both my kids say other nationalities don't get the Irish sense of humour in the way we do. That's not a criticism - it's called an observation! Neither of them socialise in Irish pubs. They both have non Irish boyfriends.

I was in London last week and was socialising with a group of friends (ages 24-49 ) and the noticeable thing was the British take a lot of stuff seriously when the Irish in the group were saying stuff tongue in cheek, a wink and a look in the eye that Brits don't always get. It's actually very funny when it happens. Canadians are similar - they take things literally

Pretty sweeping statements to say YOU have travelled more than 99% of Irish people? I would say a lot of people would beg to differ - the vast majority of 20-30 year olds have lived or worked abroad at this stage .... Many travelling through and working in many countries along the way. My kids between them have worked in Dubai, Singapore, UK, France, Italy, NZ, Australia, Canada.

90% of their friends from college are abroad. Kinda sad for my "generation" as you put it ...3 kids before the age of 26 so believe me I am having plenty of fun now that they are grown and gone and job well done !

As you like the last work on most topics Charizard I will leave the floor open to you .....and wish you well in in your travels ! :-)

First of all, your daughters are with Non Irish boyfriends, how on earth are they relevant to Irish men needing drink to talk to women
Then you say more sweeping statements, brits canadians dont get things

Fair play theve travelled to these places. I how ever have been more and just so you know Im not using this as a basis that Im more worldy or know anything more than anyone just that Im pretty certain Ive lived more places than most.

Anyways I will leave it there as you arent really relevant to anything Ive been saying

Peist2007

Coffee shops give me a pain in the face.

Peist2007

Charizard wrote: »

Anyways I will leave it there as you arent really relevant to anything Ive been saying

:pac:

In fairness, a bunch of really nice people have tried to be patient with you and explain that your statements have been too sweeping and that life is full of little grey areas in which everyone is not necessarily homogeneous.
Yet you refuse to listen and keep retorting to some very good posts with the same wrong-headed opinion.

Everyone on this thread should leave it there because you have no interest in debating. And despite you saying to the contrary, you really are not exhibiting any semblance of the open mind you say you have.

If you keep having to say "Ah you just dont get what i am saying..." - unless you are Hawking explaining Quantum Physics or a NASA scientist talking about nuclear fusion in space, then it's you.

eeguy

Charizard wrote: »

You see, no matter what I said you would have this reply :rolleyes:

I'm as interested as the next guy in finding great places for dates.

If you had a good suggestion I would have applauded it. But you didn't.

Charizard

Peist2007 wrote: »

:pac:

In fairness, a bunch of really nice people have tried to be patient with you and explain that your statements have been too sweeping and that life is full of little grey areas in which everyone is not necessarily homogeneous.
Yet you refuse to listen and keep retorting to some very good posts with the same wrong-headed opinion.

Everyone on this thread should leave it there because you have no interest in debating. And despite you saying to the contrary, you really are not exhibiting any semblance of the open mind you say you have.

If you keep having to say "Ah you just dont get what i am saying..." - unless you are Hawking explaining Quantum Physics or a NASA scientist talking about nuclear fusion in space, then it's you.

Have you ever heard of the sheep mentality, for me that explains a lot of what goes on in here, just because the mass say one thing doesnt make it a reality, have a look through history if you dont understand me, its not physics its just basic logic.
For me there hasnt been much good posts one or two, the rest was just drivel, anyways carry on thinking what you think and I will continue to wonder how people are honestly so blind to this.
Or in words you might understand, sure us Irish are great craic, sure its all for the craic, nah Im only going out for a few, one for the road,shot of courage etc etc etc

Wibbs

Charizard you're like a dog with a bone. You just won't let things go and seem to take offence at someone else having an opinion that doesn't square with yours. And then suggest they're "sheep" and are writing "drivel".

TL;DR? Do not post in this thread again. Thank you.

The Black Oil

I was talking to a woman at a conference recently. We had to work together on a project and spoke a bit during the tea break too. She was lovely, bright, genuine, warm... It was just one professional talking to another. She was about to move jobs, so I doubt I'll bump into her again. Did I mention she was lovely?

Skyfarm

The Black Oil wrote: »

I was talking to a woman at a conference recently. We had to work together on a project and spoke a bit during the tea break too. She was lovely, bright, genuine, warm... It was just one professional talking to another. She was about to move jobs, so I doubt I'll bump into her again. Did I mention she was lovely?

I'm sure there is an ism for what you describe.








found it,its called lovelyism:D

Tigger99

Would you see if you could find her on LinkedIn etc and add her and ask her out?

silverharp

Tigger99 wrote: »

Would you see if you could find her on LinkedIn etc and add her and ask her out?

but for god sake don't compliment her on her looks on the site you might get outed as a misogynist sh1tlord :pac:

Tigger99

Well the last thing I'd suggest doing is commenting on anybodies looks on a public post (or indeed private message) on LinkedIn. I'm not surprised if you were slated for doing so. But as he met her on a professional basis I think sending her a message on it would be less creepy than, say Facebook.

Pawwed Rig

Tigger99 wrote: »

I'm not surprised if you were slated for doing so. But as he met her on a professional basis I think sending her a message on it would be less creepy than, say Facebook.

Why would either be 'creepy'?

The Black Oil

Tigger99 wrote: »

Would you see if you could find her on LinkedIn etc and add her and ask her out?

Tigger99 wrote: »

Well the last thing I'd suggest doing is commenting on anybodies looks on a public post (or indeed private message) on LinkedIn. I'm not surprised if you were slated for doing so. But as he met her on a professional basis I think sending her a message on it would be less creepy than, say Facebook.

I'm not on that site, or any social media. But, in this day and age it's not hard to find (everyone searches, right? ahem) someone's info thanks to ye old Google.

Tigger99

Pawwed Rig wrote: »

Why would either be 'creepy'?

Creepy is probably the wrong word, too personal is more like it. My Facebook page us very private and it'd be hard for someone who didn't know me to find me and message me on it, whereas my LinkedIn page is far more public but only has career info on it.

zcorpian88

Just been on that dating app Plenty of Fish right for the first time in a few days, never had much luck on it really.

Saw this amazing looking nice blonde girl on it, not much in her About Me section, so many write f**k all in their about me which is kind of crap, I do like to read about whoever it is, even if it's short, it's still good to make an effort, anyway I sent a message, was humorous, light and obviously not offensive. Actually seen this girl a few times in passing in town but haven't in a long time.

Sent the message anyway, and got blocked.

WTF? Difficult to get a reply on the fecking thing but blocked for basically nothing.

Fine, date a douchebag for all I care then!

worded

LordNorbury wrote: »

Just saw this news article and said I would share it on thread, as I made the point in this discussion that I was of the view that a lot of folks these days are not doing the "having kids" thing due to financial/economic circumstances, and I included myself in this cohort of folks who have come to the view that the times we are living in are not really suitable for starting a family...

http://www.independent.ie/irish-news/women-in-30s-put-off-having-children-due-to-money-woes-30936630.html



Food for thought...

Financial castration

I think this is going to bite Ireland in the arse in years to come

Its darwinism on its head. WORKING couples can barely afford to have 1 or two kids. Who is going to pay the pensions of elderely retired people in 20 - 40 years up the road?

Pepe LeFrits

worded wrote: »

Financial castration

I think this is going to bite Ireland in the arse in years to come

Its darwinism on its head. WORKING couples can barely afford to have 1 or two kids. Who is going to pay the pensions of elderely retired people in 20 - 40 years up the road?

Our population is increasing, it really shouldn't be a problem for us in that kind of time frame.

Germany and many of the countries in eastern Europe on the other hand...

zcorpian88

zcorpian88 wrote: »

Just been on that dating app Plenty of Fish right for the first time in a few days, never had much luck on it really.

Saw this amazing looking nice blonde girl on it, not much in her About Me section, so many write f**k all in their about me which is kind of crap, I do like to read about whoever it is, even if it's short, it's still good to make an effort, anyway I sent a message, was humorous, light and obviously not offensive. Actually seen this girl a few times in passing in town but haven't in a long time.

Sent the message anyway, and got blocked.

WTF? Difficult to get a reply on the fecking thing but blocked for basically nothing.

Fine, date a douchebag for all I care then!

Pfft that's nothing. I once went on to someone'e profile and in the time it took me to type the message they'd seen that I'd viewed their profile and blocked me.