Anxiety and/or depression discussion.

thingamagig

CZ 453 wrote: »

We all could have.

Like so many posts here

Sorry to interrupt, but I agree. I am nearly certain there were times in my childhood when I was so anxious and down, it could have been classified as depression. I personally think some of this was situational and I was almost absorbing others' moods and negative opinions of me. The scary thing is that when this happens at such a young age you are almost born believing you are worthless; it becomes your default belief system.


Could that be why some of us consider ourselves to be born predisposed to depression. By the way I am not saying that anyone should accept that they were born this way. It is just nice to know that we weren't born faulty! Everyone is special and worthwhile, and maybe we did not learn this when we were growing up.

But I do feel we can all make changes, and that by taking action to improve, accept and like ourselves that we can become happier, healthier and functioning adults. My motive is not to blame a situation/person in the past, but to merely see this as the point where low self-esteem was developed.

SoSheSaid

I'm in the thick of it at the moment. I'm dealing with two pretty bad illnesses that have me on 2 courses of antibiotics AND steriods, and chronic pain on top of that. As well as my mental health **** (I suffer from PTSD, clinical depression and anxiety). I feel as if every part of me is literally breaking down. But my OH has been a godsend and I'm so grateful for that.

thingamagig

SoSheSaid wrote: »

I'm in the thick of it at the moment. I'm dealing with two pretty bad illnesses that have me on 2 courses of antibiotics AND steriods, and chronic pain on top of that. As well as my mental health **** (I suffer from PTSD, clinical depression and anxiety). I feel as if every part of me is literally breaking down. But my OH has been a godsend and I'm so grateful for that.

Feel for you. Physical pain does not make life any easier for sure. Have you sought help for your mental health?

loveisdivine

greenfrogs wrote: »

I have never heard of relationship OCD. What is that?

This is how wiki describes it. There's quite a few resources on it on google.

[quote/]
ROCD can involve obsessive doubts, preoccupations, checking, and reassurance seeking behaviours focusing on intimate relationships. Common domains of relationship obsessions include doubts regarding one's own feelings towards an intimate partner, preoccupation with the partner’s feelings towards oneself, doubts about the “rightness” of the relationship and preoccupation with the perceived flaws of the partner.[1]

Relationship-centered obsessive-compulsive symptoms
A person may continuously doubt whether they love their partner, whether their relationship is the "right" relationship or whether their partner "really" loves them.[6] Even when they know they love someone or that someone loves them, they constantly check and reassure themselves that it is the right feeling. When they attempt to end the relationship, they are overwhelmed with anxiety. Staying in the relationship, however, they are haunted by continuous doubts regarding the relationship.[/quote]

SoSheSaid

thingamagig wrote: »

Feel for you. Physical pain does not make life any easier for sure. Have you sought help for your mental health?

Hi, yes I've a great psychologist who's basically kept me alive for the past 3 years. I'd be lost without him. My doctor is amazing too, so I'm lucky that way.

I've had to give up alot of things with the chronic pain issue though, things I loved, which has made everything that little bit harder. And now this, well... it's just a lot. I lost a job a few months ago because I just didn't go in, I cut myself off from everyone for over a week. Well, a little more than usual.

But I'm dealing with it, I think. I have a new job now which means working from home (I'm a writer) and that's been really good for me, it's taken a lot of pressure off.

greenfrogs

thingamagig wrote: »

Sorry to interrupt, but I agree. I am nearly certain there were times in my childhood when I was so anxious and down, it could have been classified as depression. I personally think some of this was situational and I was almost absorbing others' moods and negative opinions of me. The scary thing is that when this happens at such a young age you are almost born believing you are worthless; it becomes your default belief system.


Could that be why some of us consider ourselves to be born predisposed to depression. By the way I am not saying that anyone should accept that they were born this way. It is just nice to know that we weren't born faulty! Everyone is special and worthwhile, and maybe we did not learn this when we were growing up.

But I do feel we can all make changes, and that by taking action to improve, accept and like ourselves that we can become happier, healthier and functioning adults. My motive is not to blame a situation/person in the past, but to merely see this as the point where low self-esteem was developed.

I like what you are saying. I think I was depressed throughout secondary school but I have fond memories of primary school. However I think I always had low self-esteem. It is true we shouldn't look at the past and what happened to make us this way. It may just make you angry and bitter. I am glad I was diagnosed with depression because finally I knew there was actually something wrong. It has been a long and tough road and will continue to be that for the next while. But I believe I have the ability to fight this. Everyday I am fighting to have the life I want and be the person I want to be. I will be happy and healthy. 'Where there is hope there is life'.

thingamagig

greenfrogs wrote: »

I like what you are saying. I think I was depressed throughout secondary school but I have fond memories of primary school. However I think I always had low self-esteem. It is true we shouldn't look at the past and what happened to make us this way. It may just make you angry and bitter. I am glad I was diagnosed with depression because finally I knew there was actually something wrong. It has been a long and tough road and will continue to be that for the next while. But I believe I have the ability to fight this. Everyday I am fighting to have the life I want and be the person I want to be. I will be happy and healthy. 'Where there is hope there is life'.

Ya, we do have the power to change. I whole-heartedly agree with you on this point. Some people think depression/anxiety is something that can't be cured and only happens to 'cracked' ones -as if. But I do think it is worth looking at your past-just not to dwell on it.

thingamagig

SoSheSaid wrote: »

Hi, yes I've a great psychologist who's basically kept me alive for the past 3 years. I'd be lost without him. My doctor is amazing too, so I'm lucky that way.

I've had to give up alot of things with the chronic pain issue though, things I loved, which has made everything that little bit harder. And now this, well... it's just a lot. I lost a job a few months ago because I just didn't go in, I cut myself off from everyone for over a week. Well, a little more than usual.

But I'm dealing with it, I think. I have a new job now which means working from home (I'm a writer) and that's been really good for me, it's taken a lot of pressure off.

Brilliant about the new job. Congrats! I too am experiencing chronic illness and understand what an impact it can have in anyone's life. I was given good advice: not to be too self-critical as it was a lot for anyone to deal with. Just trying to follow it now!

greenfrogs

thingamagig wrote: »

Ya, we do have the power to change. I whole-heartedly agree with you on this point. Some people think depression/anxiety is something that can't be cured and only happens to 'cracked' ones -as if. But I do think it is worth looking at your past-just not to dwell on it.

Yah you probably are the right. I think personally I have spent too long looking back so for me I want to move forward. Maybe when I am in a better place I can look back but for now I want to forget most of the things that happened to me.

Hugo Stiglitz

I think that in order to be able to fight back at depression, one has to be strong and passionate in their struggle. Myself though, I'm weak I must admit. I don't have the drive in me to face this head on at times. Get nowhere and staying put is easier than the struggle.

SoSheSaid

thingamagig wrote: »

Brilliant about the new job. Congrats! I too am experiencing chronic illness and understand what an impact it can have in anyone's life. I was given good advice: not to be too self-critical as it was a lot for anyone to deal with. Just trying to follow it now!

Thanks so much. I guess it's the constant physical pain on top of the PTSD issues that just makes it a lot harder to deal with, and now this illness too. Trying not to be self critical is the thing I've had to work hardest on, as I've always been working towards bettering myself, I never just 'was' - if that makes sense. But for the past 3 years of dealing with this, I've discovering that just 'being' is sometimes the most important thing of all.

SoSheSaid

Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »

I think that in order to be able to fight back at depression, one has to be strong and passionate in their struggle. Myself though, I'm weak I must admit. I don't have the drive in me to face this head on at times. Get nowhere and staying put is easier than the struggle.

So long as you're still breathing, you're fighting. That's enough. Anything else is more than enough.

loveisdivine

SoSheSaid wrote: »

So long as you're still breathing, you're fighting. That's enough. Anything else is more than enough.

So true. We are so hard on ourselves all the time. We all deserve a break.

We all need to remind ourselves that everyday we are winning just by making it through. Just one smile, one positive thought, is enough for now.

thingamagig

SoSheSaid wrote: »

Thanks so much. I guess it's the constant physical pain on top of the PTSD issues that just makes it a lot harder to deal with, and now this illness too. Trying not to be self critical is the thing I've had to work hardest on, as I've always been working towards bettering myself, I never just 'was' - if that makes sense. But for the past 3 years of dealing with this, I've discovering that just 'being' is sometimes the most important thing of all.

Ya, I think I do understand the struggle to just be, and to be present in the moment ( and not being only in my head criticising myself). Even got a caution from a counsellor that I was always working so hard at improving-trying to be perfect- that I was over-thinking and under-feeling the whole process. But best of luck to you, and you can definitely know that you are not the only one in that battle!

masonchat

.

greenfrogs

loveisdivine wrote: »

This is how wiki describes it. There's quite a few resources on it on google.

[quote/]
ROCD can involve obsessive doubts, preoccupations, checking, and reassurance seeking behaviours focusing on intimate relationships. Common domains of relationship obsessions include doubts regarding one's own feelings towards an intimate partner, preoccupation with the partner’s feelings towards oneself, doubts about the “rightness” of the relationship and preoccupation with the perceived flaws of the partner.[1]

Relationship-centered obsessive-compulsive symptoms
A person may continuously doubt whether they love their partner, whether their relationship is the "right" relationship or whether their partner "really" loves them.[6] Even when they know they love someone or that someone loves them, they constantly check and reassure themselves that it is the right feeling. When they attempt to end the relationship, they are overwhelmed with anxiety. Staying in the relationship, however, they are haunted by continuous doubts regarding the relationship.

[/QUOTE]

I have been told my GP to avoid intimate relationships. I suppose maybe she sees something in my behaviour which means I am unable to deal with them.

thingamagig wrote: »

Ya, I think I do understand the struggle to just be, and to be present in the moment ( and not being only in my head criticising myself). Even got a caution from a counsellor that I was always working so hard at improving-trying to be perfect- that I was over-thinking and under-feeling the whole process. But best of luck to you, and you can definitely know that you are not the only one in that battle!

When I was with a previous counsellor I said that i am naturally a lazy person. She laughed and agreed with me then said she shouldn't of said that. It must be nice to be seen as hard-working. I feel that I am always viewed as lazy.

SoSheSaid

thingamagig wrote: »

Ya, I think I do understand the struggle to just be, and to be present in the moment ( and not being only in my head criticising myself). Even got a caution from a counsellor that I was always working so hard at improving-trying to be perfect- that I was over-thinking and under-feeling the whole process. But best of luck to you, and you can definitely know that you are not the only one in that battle!

Thanks so much, always good to be able to connect with people who just 'get' it, you know?

SoSheSaid

greenfrogs wrote: »

I have been told my GP to avoid intimate relationships. I suppose maybe she sees something in my behaviour which means I am unable to deal with them.



When I was with a previous counsellor I said that i am naturally a lazy person. She laughed and agreed with me then said she shouldn't of said that. It must be nice to be seen as hard-working. I feel that I am always viewed as lazy.[/QUOTE]

Neither of them sound very helpful, or good at their jobs, to be honest. They're horrible things to say

SoSheSaid

greenfrogs wrote: »

I have been told my GP to avoid intimate relationships. I suppose maybe she sees something in my behaviour which means I am unable to deal with them.



When I was with a previous counsellor I said that i am naturally a lazy person. She laughed and agreed with me then said she shouldn't of said that. It must be nice to be seen as hard-working. I feel that I am always viewed as lazy.

Neither of them sound very helpful, or good at their jobs, to be honest. They're horrible things to say

greenfrogs

SoSheSaid wrote: »

Neither of them sound very helpful, or good at their jobs, to be honest. They're horrible things to say

Yah I no longer go to that counsellor thank god. With regards to my GP there are reasons why she said this. I can get very intense and obsessive with the opposite sex very easily.

downonthefarm

CZ 453 wrote: »

I left myself run out of tablets.

I need a lookout, a balaclava, a sledgehammer and a qualified pharmacist. Meet me at the local pharmacy.

Oh no hope you don't have too much of a bumpy ride
What tablets are you on?

HistoryMania

Sorry for interrupting the thread.

I am really struggling atm. I was told I had depression and GAD in 2010, I was put on Mirap, and for the last four years have been fine, until this summer.

When I finished the course I was doing I noticed that my anxiety was getting really bad. The thought of leaving the house or going on to public transport made my heart race and anxiety symptoms near crippled me.

I had a bad panic attack on a Luas one day and haven't been on one since.

I have seen a psychiatrist on Monday and they prescribed me Effexor to help with my anxiety, but looking these pills up have made me even more anxious. Its advised to take these the same time very morning, but my sleep pattern is all over the place, I never get up at the same time every day, somedays I get up at 1pm. So thats a problem.

I really want to get these issues sorted since the xmas period is here, the thoughts of going out shopping starts my heart racing as I am afraid I will have a panic attack and embarrass myself in public.

Has anyone been on Effexor? Did it help with anxiety?

Again sorry for interrupting the thread, just feel that this is the best place to put my thoughts out.

SoSheSaid

Anyone here?

Pain levels are through the roof, and it's making me mentally crumble

I would do anything in this world for a day without pain, or a night with proper sleep. Sometimes, it hurts so much that I can't tell the inside from the outside anymore.

Kayleigh..

I can't sleep, as per usual :rolleyes:

Gremlinertia

I'm here, also in pain though not to your levels currently. It's exhausting physically and mentally to be in continuous pain..

Hi Kayleigh, if somethings on your mind speak freely..

SoSheSaid

Gremlinertia wrote: »

I'm here, also in pain though not to your levels currently. It's exhausting physically and mentally to be in continuous pain..

My boyfriends lying here beside me and I don't want to wake him because he was up with me all last night too Sometimes everything just feels so relentless, you know? I feel like I just want a time out, from everything. But I can never seem to get it, because something always happens.

I've been watching The Blacklist lately, might try to watch that to distract myself.

Gremlinertia

Blacklist recorded at home must watch when I get home.. I often don't have the concentration though.. Are you finding your pain harder to bear now it's that bit colder?.

SoSheSaid

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Blacklist recorded at home must watch when I get home.. I often don't have the concentration though.. Are you finding your pain harder to bear now it's that bit colder?.

I think it's because I've a bad chest and kidney infection at the same time now too and really ill right now, so it's making the sciatica pretty intolerable on top of it. Maybe the inactivity has worsened it too as I've been stuck in bed for over a week.

I've another MRI on Tues and they're looking at surgery as an option, but it's just that right now - it's tough going.

I've been catching up with the whole series online. One more to watch to be all caught up.

How come you're not home? Working?

Gremlinertia

I haven't had any appointments bar a pain management thing earlier in the year.. Spinal cord stimulator mentioned alright but that's for when I'm totally incapacitated.

I'd imagine the bed rest is probably not helping but with those infections you couldn't be up and about anyway.. That's a pig of a catch 22..

Yeah I'm at work.. Finish in three hours.

Kayleigh..

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Hi Kayleigh, if somethings on your mind speak freely..

No I'm okay thanks just the usual not being able to sleep