Cringe worthy moments.

Graces7

Slicemeister wrote: »

What a prick of a teacher.

not at all. wise lady

sneakyST

Great thread.

Few years back, got on a bus, paid fare, spotted a free seat at the back of the bus. Just took a step and the driver set of quickly launching me into a semi jog down the aisle. Tried to grab one of bars to slow myself. Missed it which made me go faster, grabbed some woman's hair on the next row of seats. My fingers got tangled in her hair. So there's me running down the bus with some yelping woman running behind me. Came to a stop. Took me about a minute, felt like 10 to free my hand from the woman's head. Hairdo ruined. Packed bus pissing themselves. I got off next stop.


Going through security at Manchester airport, I get to the front of the queue, two serious looking officers checking passports. I panic for some reason, one police man asks "what is the purpose of your visit?" . For some unknown reason my brain offered two options ... Business or Pleasure. I blurted pleasure....wife starts pissing herself laughing. Coppers just looking at my bright red face. Wife just says visiting family and they shook their heads and sent us through.


The wife thought it would be nice to send me to get a back scrub at a beauty clinic place while she got her hair done. Why not says I, never been to one before. Get there, do all the forms and the girl doing the treatment arrives and brings me to the room. Points out all the facilities , table, oils and there's the shower. She leaves me to get ready so I assumed she pointed out the shower for me to have one. So I jump I the shower and all I hear outside is giggling outside. Like a big fecking idiot the shower is for AFTER the scrub. Didn't have time after treatment to have a shower so had to go home with **** all over my back. Couldn't get out of the place quick enough.

Pumpkinseeds

Occasionally one of our cats gets a bit of poop stuck to his bottom, so I have to put on a latex glove and get it off with some KY jelly while my husband holds him, as advised by our vet. One eveing last year I was in the kitchen making dinner with the back door open and as my husband was walking up the stairs I shouted 'we have to do that thing with the KY jelly later' I didn't realise the neighbours were in their back garden until I heard the hysterical laughter and giggling:o

Slicemeister

Graces7 wrote: »

not at all. wise lady

Could she not have left the young fella alone? Bad enough he had to live with the ridicule he opened himself up to when he handed in the porn mag, then to have to listen to stick from his parents too?

Way to keep a fella down, teacher only did it for their own self gratification. A prick if ever.

In God's pocket:-/

wp_rathead

sneakyST wrote: »

Going through security at Manchester airport, I get to the front of the queue, two serious looking officers checking passports. I panic for some reason, one police man asks "what is the purpose of your visit?" . For some unknown reason my brain offered two options ... Business or Pleasure. I blurted pleasure....wife starts pissing herself laughing. Coppers just looking at my bright red face. Wife just says visiting family and they shook their heads and sent us through.

haha, exactly what I needed this morning on way to work this Monday morning - cheers for that

gramar

A cousin of mine was in Spain with a mate on holidays. With nothing particular to do they decided to head to Barcelona about 600km away to watch a Champions league Group game against Man United. Getting there they noticed that there wasn't much atmosphere and no sign of the visiting fans but not put off they went into a bar and had a couple of drinks and picked up one of the daily sports papers. That was when they realised that the game was on in Old Trafford Manchester.

Graces7

Slicemeister wrote: »

Could she not have left the young fella alone? Bad enough he had to live with the ridicule he opened himself up to when he handed in the porn mag, then to have to listen to stick from his parents too?

Way to keep a fella down, teacher only did it for their own self gratification. A prick if ever.

In God's pocket:-/

missing the point...so we are to be seen to condone porn? teachers have a responsibility here...you judge wrongly. small wonder ireland is in such a state. no self gratification about it but with the language you use of course you see it like this.

Graces7

Graces7 wrote: »

missing the point...so we are to be seen to condone porn? teachers have a responsibility here...you judge wrongly. small wonder ireland is in such a state. no self gratification about it but with the language you use of course you see it like this.

Whatever about condoning porn, she got the DVD so the big 'threat' was passed. She didn't have to humiliate the kid in front of his family as well. Overkill.

Like it's overkill to dismiss a persons judgment on the basis of a curse word.

Paddy Cow

Graces7 wrote: »

missing the point...so we are to be seen to condone porn? teachers have a responsibility here...you judge wrongly. small wonder ireland is in such a state. no self gratification about it but with the language you use of course you see it like this.

The teacher confiscated the magazine. There was no need to hand it to the parents and put them all in an awkward situation. The teacher was being a douchebag.

SouthTippBass

Graces7 wrote: »

missing the point...so we are to be seen to condone porn? teachers have a responsibility here...you judge wrongly. small wonder ireland is in such a state. no self gratification about it but with the language you use of course you see it like this.

The deal was, leave your contraband on the chair and no more would be said about it, no questions would be asked. First opportunity the teacher got to humiliate the kid he did, and for what? The kids own good? Nope, so the teacher could feel like a smug smartarse bastard.

bear1

I'm siding against the teacher here, what a pure prick.
If I was the father I'd be looking for a meeting with the idiot about it.

El Weirdo

bear1 wrote: »

I'm siding against the teacher here, what a pure prick.
If I was the father I'd be looking for a meeting with the idiot about it.

After you'd watched the DVD though, obviously.

eisenberg1

El Weirdo wrote: »

After you'd watched the DVD though, obviously.

Altogether, as a family.

bear1

El Weirdo wrote: »

After you'd watched the DVD though, obviously.

Pff of course, what kind of man wouldn't examine the evidence before making a formal complaint.

Wossack

bear1 wrote: »

Pff of course, what kind of man wouldn't examine the evidence before making a formal complaint.

I presume 'formal complaint' is a euphemism?

El Weirdo

bear1 wrote: »

Pff of course, what kind of man wouldn't examine the evidence before making a formal complaint.

Indeed, a man'd be mad to go into anything without all the information to hand.

gramar

El Weirdo wrote: »

Indeed, a man'd be mad to go into anything without all the information to hand.

..which would be necessary before he came....to a conclusion

Going Strong

El Weirdo wrote: »

Indeed, a man'd be mad to go into anything without all the information to hand.

Not a fan of Liveline then?

bear1

gramar wrote: »

..which would be necessary before he came....to a conclusion

Without rock hard evidence, there wouldn't be any point coming to the school at all.

snaphook

We played under age soccer with the local club.

One of the coaches, Brendan, would, if the team was playing poorly or were losing, shout encouragement in a hilariosuly camp manner with theatrical gestures that would be the envy of a Shakesperean actor.

"Awwww, come onnnnnn United!!!!!"

Much mirth was taken from this from the parents who attended the matches and it was an inevitable moment during each game.

Weeks later in town with my Mam and Dad, we saw Brendan and 7 year old me, goes up to him and says;

"Brendan!!, say 'Awww come on United!' " replete with his trademark gestures.

Got a clatter for that one.

desbrook

I'm attending Christmas Eve mass with my 2 and a half year old son whose getting crankier and more tired by the minute in the packed church . Mass is about half way through but he's convinced it should be over.
Hence when the priest and congregation solemly recited " Christ had died, Christ has risen Christ will come again " he followed up with " NO. ..HE ...WONT! " at the top of his voice. Mortified wasn't the word!

mathie

Pumpkinseeds wrote: »

Occasionally one of our cats gets a bit of poop stuck to his bottom, so I have to put on a latex glove and get it off with some KY jelly while my husband holds him, as advised by our vet. One eveing last year I was in the kitchen making dinner with the back door open and as my husband was walking up the stairs I shouted 'we have to do that thing with the KY jelly later' I didn't realise the neighbours were in their back garden until I heard the hysterical laughter and giggling:o

... and this is why I'll never own a cat.

.Henry Sellers.

Reading back on this thread has brought to light some cringey moments I had forgotten about.
This must of been fairly cringey for a girl I used to work with in a supermarket, there were three of us siting up in the canteen on our break chatting and watching t.v. The girl sitting beside me was squirming on her seat and had her hand covered over by the sleeve of her jumper and was moving it around the seat.
She was moving about on the chair while I was staring at the t.v and I only copped something was up when she started nodding and pointing with her eyes to the girl in front of us.
I didn't have a clue what was going on with the two of them and after a minute or so they fecked off, for some reason I looked at the chair she was sitting on I seen a big smear of blood across the seat. Mother Nature just ruined my appetite for my lunchtime bag of potato cubes with red sauce.

Pumpkinseeds

mathie wrote: »

... and this is why I'll never own a cat.

No one ever owns a cat, we're just the hired help that live under the paw:D

Ash.J.Williams

cruais wrote: »

Colleague: "I got engaged last night"

Me: "Well done!"

ha ha i said "well done" to a friends wife that just had a baby.....the F**ing dirty look she gave me ....followed by in that horrible female tone and "you're some wan"er" look........."WELL DONE????"

Tasden

Ash.J.Williams wrote: »

ha ha i said "well done" to a friends wife that just had a baby.....the F**ing dirty look she gave me ....followed by in that horrible female tone and "you're some wan"er" look........."WELL DONE????"

I thought well done was a fairly normal thing to say to a woman who has just given birth, loads of people said it to me and I thought it was nice

eisenberg1

Tasden wrote: »

I thought well done was a fairly normal thing to say to a woman who has just given birth, loads of people said it to me and I thought it was nice

As long as they don't say "Aah, sure you are a great girl":D

cletus van damme

once on holidays was walking through killareny with my son (then 6) passed an old woman with a scottish terrier type dog.
son stops and points at the dog and shouts "Dad look!! a wanker dog".

wtf ...

Woman stops and glares at me so I give him a chance to fix the situation "What was that?" I asked hoping he'd realise his faux pas and say something else

"It's a wanker" he roared laughing and pointing at the dog.
"evening" I said to the woman scurring off leaving her glaring at me.

"is that a bad word?" he askes me when I take him aside for a telling off.

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

Had my young cousin over for a visit, and he loves playing with my dog. One saturday he came over, and my dad had taken the dog out the beach for a walk.

"Where's the dog?" cousin asks.

For a laugh I told him I'd given her away because she was bold, I drove her out to the animal sanctuary and cos it was closed I threw her over the gate. He just shook his head, then never asked again.

Got a phone call from my uncle a few weeks later, in stitches laughing. The child's class had been on a trip to the animal sanctuary. During the trip the guide explained to the class that some owners can be very cruel, and throw their pets over the gate.

Cousin puts up his hand. "I know who that was, his name's Duracell Bunny, and he lives in Drogheda"

captbarnacles

At mass when I was 12 I went up to get communion and as I turned away and went to put it on my tongue I inexplicably exhaled and send the bread floating into the middle of the people in the pews. There was a stunned silence and I half ran down the aisle and out the door. Luckily I was on my own at Mass and nobody I knew saw it happen