Due August 2014

morebabies

llambert wrote: »

Please morebabies tell this first timer that this usually sorts itself over the coming months.

I've one up on my 2 this evening. Invested in a slow cooker so while they were snoozing this morning I popped dinner in for today & tomorrow, first time making thai green curry, smells delicious with no effort! Have bottles made till 2pm tomorrow. Bottles washed & loaded in steriliser for morning. So even though I got no naps today I'm not stressed trying to contend with them & do all that plus I can sleep anytime tomorrow when they do.....well that's the plan anyway.

i am no expert, every baby is so different, i'm like a first time mom with each of them, but that's one thing they've all had in common, that unsettled evening time, but like i said, haven't a clue why, but i think it petered off around 12 weeks.

and look at you how organised you are, i've often wondered what it'slike to have twins, i don't think i could manage it tbh, all credit to you

Lucuma

Yeah llambert I'm full of admiration for you as well managing 2....I'm finding it tough going with just 1 I have to say :-/ Feeling a little bit trapped & panicky. If I get sleep I can cope but last night was a bad one :-(

emer_b

Lucuma I remember that feeling well, trapped and panicky. I felt like that for about 3/4 months with my first. I was always rushing and stressed out. This time I'm so much more relaxed because I know things will get better, in just a few short months. I genuinely thought I would never have a minute to myself again but you do regain your life and independence, sooner than you think.

My family called over yesterday, about 8 of them. Was lovely, they make the tea, clean up, play with my toddler. It's great to break the monotony! My sister had a captain Morgan and coke (my favourite), I had a sip and it was heaven! As soon as baby is sleeping a good stretch at night I'll allow myself one or two drinks, can't wait.

My husband is brilliant at cooking and looking after the toddler but not so much at the housework, just the bare minimum of tidying up. The dirt and dust around the place was really stressing me out so with visitors calling yesterday I finally got him to Hoover and clean (I hate to be nagging about it, he really is great). Then today I got a load of ironing done. It has actually lifted my mood so much. I was crying yesterday about a dirty bathroom, really gets me down when the house is dirty. I booked a cleaner today for the first time, just to call once a fortnight. Think it could actually save my sanity over next few months!

llambert

I hope it does lessen around the 12 week mark, it would mean I'm half way there :-)

I know exactly how you're feeling Lucuma. At times especially during the week I find it can be very isolating. The big positive is that I've got to know loads more of my neighbours. I usually be in work all day and these ladies would normally be gone in with their kids by the time I get home. I try get out walking nearly everyday for an hour just to get out of the house. Every weekend no matter how wrecked I am I try do something. We either go to town or bring the dog for a nice long walk. I need it for my sanity. Do you get I out much??

I'm far from organised at times and the wheels can fall off spectacularly. I cry at least once a week when I beyond tired. I cope cos I know no different. Like emer-b I'm blessed with a hubby who does a lot. He gets home sorts out clothes, washes and makes bottles, cleans up after dinner. Takes the pressure off abit.

shortstuff!

Shays 3weeks today, time is flying! Breast feeding is going well, think we're going through a growth spurt, feeding a lot and sleeping very little. He falls asleep at the boob most of the time but wakes up once I put him down. Reckon he had a total of 2hours sleep during the day yesterday, thank god for all the batch cooking I prepared! Was up every hour last night until I put him in with us & not in his co sleeper, then managed 2 3hour blocks of sleep. Gone is the baby we couldn't keep awake in the hospital!

emer_b

shortstuff! wrote: »

Shays 3weeks today, time is flying! Breast feeding is going well, think we're going through a growth spurt, feeding a lot and sleeping very little. He falls asleep at the boob most of the time but wakes up once I put him down. Reckon he had a total of 2hours sleep during the day yesterday, thank god for all the batch cooking I prepared! Was up every hour last night until I put him in with us & not in his co sleeper, then managed 2 3hour blocks of sleep. Gone is the baby we couldn't keep awake in the hospital!

I could have written this myself, we're exactly the same at the moment!
Just went into town for a short while. She screamed all the way in, all the way around the shops and all the way home. Had to stop for lunch, even though I wasn't planning to, and feed her for a bit while trying to eat a salad with one hand!

shortstuff!

It must be normal so emer_b, thanks for that, so reassuring! Here's hoping is passes quickly for both of us;) Gonna risk going for a walk once he's finished this feed, been saying that since 11...

Kaylami

Well Evie is 7weeks this week and finally seems to have got herself a wee routine.

Last feed at 11 and sleeps until 6am. She doesn't sleep during the day from 1 to 6 then she's like a weasel from 6-10 then happy little monkey again.
She's far too busy watching the girls and cooing away.

Today was not a good day I woke up in the worst of form and then it came to a head and I roared at the oh for not pulling his weight around the house.
I'm just fed up he's great with the girls but the housework forget it. He sits in front of the TV all day watching replays of football matches.

So I let him have it. Now I feel better

llambert

Bad news for you Kaylami, champions league football back on tonight.......say your oh will do a burst now around the house and get brave later!!!

Great that you're getting such a great stretch at night with Evie, my 2 are still every 4 hours might stretch to 5 hours the very odd night.

They roared all afternoon yesterday so let them in the hope they'd sleep after the evening feed. It seemed to have worked for about 30 minutes but then Adam started, Cian joined in. Adam went back asleep but Cian roared like a train till 10. They're lucky they didnt end up out on the clothes line :-) Have them here kicking on the bed. Don't think they're too happy but afraid to have us on the sofa anymore with the wriggling.

Kaylami

Well that was short lived all right cleaned over and then lo and behold football again. You called it exactly right llambert!

You'll get there with the boys don't worry x

Lucuma

Those 4 hour stretches you speak of are what's tempting me to give up b'feeding llambert!
I'm only barely holding it together ....just sooooo tired :-(

emer_b

Lucuma wrote: »

Those 4 hour stretches you speak of are what's tempting me to give up b'feeding llambert!
I'm only barely holding it together ....just sooooo tired :-(

I know I've mentioned it here before bit have you tried lying down feeding with baby along side you in bed? It's working well for me at 3weeks. Depends on the latch though. Or make a pillow fort for yourself so can recline in bed, baby across your chest and nod off that way. Easier said than done I know. But breastfeeding is so frequent and time consuming for the first few weeks/months that finding a way to sleep while feeding is the only thing that keeps me going! Hang in there, you'll be do glad you did x

llambert

Don't let that sway you Lucuma. Some nights they feed every 4 hrs which is only a 3 hour break between. Plus mine are more than 4 weeks older. At your stage they were feeding every 3 hours.

I was sorry I didn't keep going with the bf till at least my milk came in to see if it was something I could have managed. Do what's best for your situation. Don't be a martyr if it's a struggle for you but baba might not sleep any better on the bottle.

Hope it gets easier soon whatever you decide.

Kaylami

Lucama is tough when it feels like every few mins but stick with it it does get easier!

I agree with emer try and find a position that means you can sleep or at least doze while feeding.

Evie likes lying down because she can look at me and we have great wee chats while she feeds but during the day I change it up so she "knows" that lyong down is her bedtime feed. She gets that at 11 and if she's not awake I've started to wake her and then I get a 6/7 hour stretch.

Kaylami

I'm going to kill my husband I've decided it's for the best.

If he whinnges at me for sex one more time. Don't get me wrong we've done it it was fine but when Evie is napping and I want to clean he follows me around the house pulling out of me.

I feel better now. That's not really a conversation to have with my mam....lol

Lucuma

emer_b wrote: »

Lucuma I remember that feeling well, trapped and panicky. I felt like that for about 3/4 months with my first. I was always rushing and stressed out. This time I'm so much more relaxed because I know things will get better, in just a few short months. I genuinely thought I would never have a minute to myself again but you do regain your life and independence, sooner than you think.

That is absolute music to my ears Emerb....at the moment I feel like I'm never going to have energy or time back for any kind of a normal life so it's good to hear that from someone that has been through it all before.

llambert wrote: »

I know exactly how you're feeling Lucuma. At times especially during the week I find it can be very isolating. The big positive is that I've got to know loads more of my neighbours. I usually be in work all day and these ladies would normally be gone in with their kids by the time I get home. I try get out walking nearly everyday for an hour just to get out of the house. Every weekend no matter how wrecked I am I try do something. We either go to town or bring the dog for a nice long walk. I need it for my sanity. Do you get I out much??

I'm far from organised at times and the wheels can fall off spectacularly. I cry at least once a week when I beyond tired. I cope cos I know no different. Like emer-b I'm blessed with a hubby who does a lot. He gets home sorts out clothes, washes and makes bottles, cleans up after dinner. Takes the pressure off abit.

Going for a walk isn't really an option with breastfed baby Llambert (please someone correct me if I'm wrong...) tried it once and she started crying after 10 mins, it's not like I can put her to the boob while walking along and push the buggy at the same time! There's no way of knowing when or if she'll wake so unfortunately I feel like I can't take advantage of this beautiful indian summer :-( By the time I can take her out for walks it'll probably be winter! I suppose at least with a bottle fed baby when they're just after a feed and winded and have fallen asleep, you can be sure they'll sleep for at least 2 hours so you can actually go for walks and stuff?

I do go out in the car almost every day though - actually I'd say every single day I run an errand or go somewhere. She falls into a deep sleep in the maxi cosi in the car and usually this lasts for at least a half an hour or an hour after I take her out of the car so I can go for lunch or go shopping etc (quick dashes round the shops mind!). Oh and as for crying once a week unfortunately I'm on a 'at least once daily' crying roster at the moment!

emer_b wrote: »

I know I've mentioned it here before bit have you tried lying down feeding with baby along side you in bed? It's working well for me at 3weeks. Depends on the latch though. Or make a pillow fort for yourself so can recline in bed, baby across your chest and nod off that way. Easier said than done I know. But breastfeeding is so frequent and time consuming for the first few weeks/months that finding a way to sleep while feeding is the only thing that keeps me going! Hang in there, you'll be do glad you did x

Yep all the feeds at night are in the lying down position. I swaddle her at night and once she nods off in the bed I move her to the moses basket. Sometimes it works and she sleeps for a stretch, sometimes it doesn't & I have to bring her back into bed for another feed :-/. I'm now so anxoious and sleep deprived though that last night even though she slept in the basket for a 3 hour stretch (!) after a 4am feed I lay awake for teh entire time !! And I'm absolutely exhausted like....but there was so many things going around my head I couldnt' sleep. Also she has taken to grunting in her sleep this can last for hours, I keep thinking with every grunt that she's on the verge of waking up so I can't sleep - argh! And this is with earplugs in, I can still hear the grunts! I suppose I'll get used to it eventually. I stayed in bed with her til noon today trying to make up for it, I thinkI must have snatched some sleep somewhere coz after a shower etc I'm actually feeling ok now. As for being glad I did...sometimes i wonder. My friend from school who got 600 points in her Leaving cert the year I did it (many moons ago!) and is really good at sports, really outgoing and bubbly, very successful etc and never had any health issues told me that she and all her siblings were formula fed - hmm!!

Lucuma

Kaylami wrote: »

I'm going to kill my husband I've decided it's for the best.

If he whinnges at me for sex one more time. Don't get me wrong we've done it it was fine but when Evie is napping and I want to clean he follows me around the house pulling out of me.

I feel better now. That's not really a conversation to have with my mam....lol

Sex??!?! That's laughable!! That won't be on the agenda for .....a while let's just say! I take it you didn't have stitches then Kaylami?

llambert

Lucuma I really don't have any advice for you regarding the bf. As far as I know it is suppose to settle down but that's not much use to you now when you're feeling the way you do. I find the buggy knocks my two out for the count once we get going but they're all different. Could you express and let someone else help with the feeds do you can catch up on some sleep??

If its any consolation mine are 7 wks and I feel like I'm turning a corner or maybe I'm just getting use to this extreme tiredness.

Kaylami you're gas. My hubby hasn't even suggested it. I'm still bleeding a little so that would definitely put me off. If I wasn't so tired I'd be worried about him not looking for it but all I am at the moment is grateful :-)

Kaylami

Lucama it does get easier i promise.
I know what you mean about being at their beck and call just in case they wake for a feed.

They do settle and you can anticipate when they need to be fed.

No stitches or tears here so I couldn't use that as an excuse!

shortstuff!

Sorry to hear your finding it tough Lucuma, Maeve is so new, only 2weeks right? Things definitely get better! Shays 3weeks & even with his latest growth spurt it has gotten easier. I hear ya on the walks, we went to go yesterday & managed 50metres of screaming. Back home, another breast feed, nappy change & once settled tried again & managed a 4mile walk! With a section if I didn't go for a walk I'd feel so trapped to the house so for me I have to persevere with the tears... & sure if I have to feed at the side of the road so be it!! Does help to someone available to pick us up if needed but haven't needed it yet...

No sex here either, still bleeding & stitches havnt fully dissolved yet, last thing on our minds with the lack of sleep & a baby in the bed with us:)

Kaylami

Hope all you ladies are doing well!

Evie christening is on Sunday so going to stay with the in laws (oh joy)

But excitement I am going to the hairdressers tomorrow this is exciting and yes Evie will have to tag along just in case she needs a feed but omg the outside world!

shortstuff!

Enjoy the christening Kaylami:) I'd be super excited to get my hair done too, happy pampering!

llambert

Hope you have great day 2moro Kaylami and you're inlaws are good to you!!

Can't wait to get home and get my hair done. My best friend is a stylist so sorts me out. Hope Evie behaved in the hairdressers.

It was our anniversary yesterday, 5 years. Got best pressie. A full night sleep. Was convinced I'd still hear the boys but slept from 11 - 7.30 and didn't hear a peep!! Got up then & walked the dog in nearby woods. It was lovely to get out on my own.

Hope everyone is having a lovely wknd x

Lucuma

Happy anniversary llambert, a full night's sleep what an excellent pressie! Kaylami hope the christening goes well. Maeve's is going to be a political & logistical nightmare ....I don't even want to think about it!
Yeah if I couldn't drive I would definitely perservere with the walks to get out of the house

Cameoette

hope all you ladies are keeping well! loved catching up on your posts. I've been pretty poor at logging on lately so good to be back!

My baby had her 2 week check yesterday and all is well. She's feeding like a champ which is a relief as several midwives in the hospital reckoned because she was so massive she'd need topping up with formula but she's just being breastfed now the past week. She's just above her birthweight now and is in 3 month size clothes already! Mad.

Lucuma my little one grunts all night too. I'm beginning to think I am not winding her enough, once we stopped topping up with formula I kind of didn't worry about winding her too much but realising she still needs a little burp after each feed now. So will try that tonight.

Lol I cannot imagine sex ever happening again after episiotomy, forceps, piles! Please tell me I'll feel normal again in 4 weeks time, right?

I am dying to get my hair done, I would crack mirrors at the moment!

Kaylami

Well ladies we had a fantastic day Evie slept through the whole thing!

My hair is lovely really dark with red highlights think I'm having some sort of teenage rebellion! Evie was a brat in the hairdressers but just tucked her under the cape and let her feed.

Cameotte - glad your doing well and you will feel normal again at some stage it's like you just wake up one day and the pain is gone!

Lucama glad your both keeping well!

Llambert that sounds like heaven I am incredibly jealous and happy anniversary x

llambert

Cameoette it's great your little one is getting on so well........or not so little!!

Glad you enjoyed Evie's special day and even better that she behaved so well. We booked the boys one this weekend but not till Nov 2nd.

Just had a 4am conversation with my hubby I didn't think I'd ever have. Told him to be careful in the morning when he lets out the dog cos there's a hedgehog in the middle of the garden. Its not the hedgehog's safely I'm worried about either. When I let the dog out he stood there and cried at it. He didn't even notice the cat on the wall. We must be the only dog owners who has a cat coming in to use our back garden as a toilet. Think we got a dud dog.........see I'd miss all this uf I didn't have these night feeds!!

Lucuma

Yeah my lo has one burp after each feed Cameoette.
My hubby was around for the weekend & he insisted on me sleeping in a separate room on Sat night while he did the night with her. I left him 2 bottles of expressed milk & 1 bottle of formula. I was off duty from 11pm til 7am. The novelty!! I still woke up loads though but it was nice to get a reminder of what my old normal life was like & could be like again in the future!
So far there's nothing about this that I enjoy or like, it feels like a massive test of endurance & stamina. I've been awake since 2:30am this morning though so that doesn't help! She slept this morn from 7ish til around 10am but I lay there awake despite having been awake most of the night :-( I've always had issues with sleep and suffered from insomnia....in the last few yrs I've gotten a handle on it -I can sleep as long as the conditions are just so: total darkness, silence, temperature ok, separate duvets and my husband has to go to bed the same time as me; if I know someone is going to be coming into the room I can't sleep. So eh...I'm not really cut out for this baby thing at all! Basically it's going to be sleepless torture til she's a few months old

llambert

Ah Lucuma God love you. You must be going demented with the tiredness. The only thing that gets me though is been able to sleep when they do. It must be terrible to not be able to do that. It was great that your hubby could do that. He'll have to do it more often cos there's no way you can continue like this long term.

I felt exactly how you do now. If you're like me you'll probably be a little confused by this. As we met on the ttc thread we went on a journey to get these little people. The reality is a real shocker. I felt really bad complaining about how hard motherhood is but then said to myself that just because I worked so hard to get them doesn't mean I can't complain about the hardship that goes with having them.

Even though I loved them to bits it's only now that I'm starting to enjoy them.

I promise that once Meave gets to 6 or 7 weeks you'll turn a corner. I'm only a month ahead of you but it really is getting easier with each week x x

Kaylami

I agree with llambert it does get easier after 6/7 weeks.

Plus of it was so terrible right the way through I would have stopped at 1!

Evie has her wee routine now but if anything disrupts that she is out of whack for that night ands the next day