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Gay Adoption?

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    #212
    gcgirl
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,044 ✭✭✭gcgirl


    The crazies are still here I see!!

    You don't choose to be Gay

    I really wish people would really get a can of cop on


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    #213
    shopaholic01
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,916 ✭✭✭shopaholic01


    padd b1975 wrote: »
    It could be an act of rebellion towards his macho siblings.

    Perharps his ramping up of the campness was his way of saying 'in your face family!' instead of responding with the sort of behaviour tough ****ers would expect.
    So people 'chose' to be gay to annoy their relatives? Would children adopted by gay parents 'chose' to be straight to annoy their parents?

    HEADLINE: Cure for gayness disovered.


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    #214
    Madam_X
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,327 ✭✭✭Madam_X


    If you really want to have sex with women, you'll have sex with women, not men when you don't actually want to, in order to make a point - and for so many decades.


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    #215
    1ZRed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    darced wrote: »
    This post has been deleted.
    I am.
    darced wrote: »
    This post has been deleted.

    That's a tired stereotype. I used to think that it might have been true just from the depiction in the media but on actually meeting a fair few gay lads it doesn't stand up. The only difference I've noticed is that the ones with more understanding fathers were happier, both still gay though.


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    #216
    1ZRed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    padd b1975 wrote: »
    It could be an act of rebellion towards his macho siblings.

    Perharps his ramping up of the campness was his way of saying 'in your face family!' instead of responding with the sort of behaviour tough ****ers would expect.

    That's balls. I've yet to meet anyone who would actually choose to be gay at all never mind to just piss anyone off.

    What's the excuse for camp straight men? You probably assume them to be gay like everyone assumes me to be straight on meeting me.


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    #217
    padd b1975
    Registered Users Posts: 10,733 ✭✭✭✭padd b1975


    shopaholic01 wrote: »
    So people 'chose' to be gay to annoy their relatives? Would children adopted by gay parents 'chose' to be straight to annoy their parents?

    HEADLINE: Cure for gayness disovered.
    Sorry, you misinterpreted my post.

    My point is that he may have chosen to be extremely camp to annoy his relatives.

    The fact that he is attracted to other men and his reasons for being that way are not in dispute by me.


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    #218
    B0jangles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,951 ✭✭✭B0jangles


    darced wrote: »
    This post has been deleted.

    Do these same families produce lesbians to the same extent, if not, why not?

    Why would single mothers (who'd have to be pretty tough to survive, and possibly have reasons to be cross with straight men) not produce lots of lesbian daughters?

    Why wouldn't abusive, homophobic fathers not produce more lesbian, man-phobic daughters?

    Maybe because the reasons people are lesbian/gay are more deep-seated and complex than having had ****ty gender role-models as children?


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    #219
    padd b1975
    Registered Users Posts: 10,733 ✭✭✭✭padd b1975


    1ZRed wrote: »
    That's balls. I've yet to meet anyone who would actually choose to be gay at all never mind to just piss anyone off.

    What's the excuse for camp straight men? You probably assume them to be gay like everyone assumes me to be straight on meeting me.
    My point was questioning his campness, not his sexuality.

    Camp straight men??

    It takes all sorts to make the world go round:o


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    #220
    shopaholic01
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,916 ✭✭✭shopaholic01


    padd b1975 wrote: »
    Sorry, you misinterpreted my post.

    My point is that he may have chosen to be extremely camp to annoy his relatives.

    The fact that he is attracted to other men and his reasons for being that way are not in dispute by me.
    So you're saying he made a conscious decision to be 'more' gay?

    I didn't realise there were degrees of gayness.


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    #221
    K-9
    Registered Users Posts: 43,311 ✭✭✭✭K-9


    padd b1975 wrote: »
    Sorry, you misinterpreted my post.

    My point is that he may have chosen to be extremely camp to annoy his relatives.

    The fact that he is attracted to other men and his reasons for being that way are not in dispute by me.

    Chose to be extremely camp? Jaysus, if he is that good an actor he should try Hollywood.

    Mad Men's Don Draper : What you call love was invented by guys like me, to sell nylons.



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    #222
    B0jangles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,951 ✭✭✭B0jangles


    shopaholic01 wrote: »
    So you're saying he made a conscious decision to be 'more' gay?

    I didn't realise there were degrees of gayness.

    To be sure there are: it's all calculated on the Sondheim scale.

    :P


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    #223
    gcgirl
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,044 ✭✭✭gcgirl


    padd b1975 wrote: »
    My point was questioning his campness, not his sexuality.

    Camp straight men??

    It takes all sorts to make the world go round:o

    I know a few really camp straight men


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    #224
    Sulla Felix
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,442 ✭✭✭Sulla Felix


    Think it's stupid that a single person can adopt a child but not a couple unless the couple are straight. Afaik the straight couple don't even have to be married!


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    #225
    1ZRed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    padd b1975 wrote: »
    My point was questioning his campness, not his sexuality.

    Camp straight men??

    It takes all sorts to make the world go round:o

    You think they don't exist? You'd be very mistaken for thinking that, you probably assume them to be gay so you don't realise.

    For many camp guys it's actually something they can't help as it's within their personality. Being honest, I used to dislike their attitude, because to me, it correlated to being stereotypically gay which I hated, as I wasn't. They get some abuse from the majority of gay men and straight men, yet they continue because they can't help it. I actually realised that and let them off. It's not my thing but feck it, live and let live.

    That's why I don't believe it's put on in the majority of cases as they just can't help it unless they repress it to fit in and avoid the abuse. There's just no benefit to playing it up and acting more camp out of nowhere unless you are camp by your nature.


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    #226
    shopaholic01
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,916 ✭✭✭shopaholic01


    B0jangles wrote: »
    To be sure there are: it's all calculated on the Sondheim scale.

    :P
    Is there an equivalent for straightness?


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    #227
    Madam_X
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,327 ✭✭✭Madam_X


    1ZRed wrote: »
    You think they don't exist? You'd be very mistaken for thinking that, you probably assume them to be gay so you don't realise.

    For many camp guys it's actually something they can't help as it's within their personality. Being honest, I used to dislike their attitude, because to me, it correlated to being stereotypically gay which I hated, as I wasn't. They get some abuse from the majority of gay men and straight men, yet they continue because they can't help it. I actually realised that and let them off. It's not my thing but feck it, live and let live.

    That's why I don't believe it's put on in the majority of cases as they just can't help it unless they repress it to fit in and avoid the abuse. There's just no benefit to playing it up and acting more camp out of nowhere unless you are camp by your nature.
    Some guys do over-camp though - guys I've known who pretended to be hetero when we all knew they were more than likely gay, because they were innately camp. Then when they came out, they went to town on the camp - I guess because they felt so much freedom due to coming out. I'm not being critical of it, but to be fair to those who feel it can be over-done, they're not necessarily wrong.


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    #228
    B0jangles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,951 ✭✭✭B0jangles


    shopaholic01 wrote: »
    Is there an equivalent for straightness?

    I was going to suggest the Segal scale but I thing those pesky Gays have managed to infiltrate Segal fandom too (in an ironic way).

    Seriously though, Sondheim musicals are pure-strain gay-friendly awesomeness. Check out 85 year old Angela Lansbury singing at his testimonial:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Fa_kn5iVYU

    Pity me, I was forced to watch that awful Depp Sweeney Todd about 10 times by my awesome brother who is gay, when he actually just loves the Lansbury version which I really do love. He also introduced me to Sondheim musicals in general.

    Dude rocks.

    Sondheim's ok too :D


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    #229
    1ZRed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    Madam_X wrote: »
    Some guys do over-camp though - guys I've known who pretended to be hetero when we all knew they were more than likely gay, because they were innately camp. Then when they came out, they went to town on the camp - I guess because they felt so much freedom due to coming out. I'm not being critical of it, but to be fair to those who feel it can be over-done, they're not necessarily wrong.

    Oh I'm not saying you're wrong. In fact I had it in mind while typing that but didn't want it to get too long and OT so I said the majority don't play it up instead of all of them don't.

    I agree with you though, it's the freedom they feel when they come out to express themselves when they couldn't have before that causes a few to go overboard. They usually do settle down a bit from what I've observed. Still camp but less "flaming" I should say :D


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    #230
    shopaholic01
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,916 ✭✭✭shopaholic01


    B0jangles wrote: »
    I was going to suggest the Segal scale but I thing those pesky Gays have managed to infiltrate Segal fandom too (in an ironic way).

    Seriously though, Sondheim musicals are pure-strain gay-friendly awesomeness. Check out 85 year old Angela Lansbury singing at his testimonial:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Fa_kn5iVYU

    Pity me, I was forced to watch that awful Depp Sweeney Todd about 10 times by my awesome brother who is gay, when he actually just loves the Lansbury version which I really do love. He also introduced me to Sondheim musicals in general.

    Dude rocks.

    Sondheim's ok too :D
    Oh dear! I really need to check if I'm straight, just in case I'm just rebelling. ;)


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    #231
    1ZRed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    shopaholic01 wrote: »
    Oh dear! I really need to check if I'm straight, just in case I'm just rebelling. ;)

    Just so happens I need to check and see if I'm gay ;)


    :p


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    #232
    shopaholic01
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,916 ✭✭✭shopaholic01


    1ZRed wrote: »
    Just so happens I need to check and see if I'm gay ;)


    :p
    If it turns out that you're straight and I'm gay we'll have to put it down to being boardies friends!

    On topic, I would like to see adoption approved for gay couples - seeing well adjusted children of gay couples might help dispel some of the myths associated with sexuality.


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    #233
    pragmatic1
    Registered Users Posts: 5,573 ✭✭✭pragmatic1


    orestes wrote: »
    Why do people think that the ability to conceive a child is the same thing as the ability to be a good parent?
    This deserves post of the day.


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    #234
    B0jangles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,951 ✭✭✭B0jangles


    1ZRed wrote: »
    Just so happens I need to check and see if I'm gay ;)


    :p

    You're attracted to the same sex but not a Sondheim fan?

    FYI you're not actually gay, just straight-unfriendly.

    How unsociable of you.

    You monster.

    :P


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    #235
    Czarcasm
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,076 ✭✭✭✭Czarcasm


    darced wrote: »
    In my opinion the vast majority of gay guys come from either a single mother or are raised in a home with a hard man father who is pretty abusive,and normally homophobic.
    I've seen this too many times for it not to be a pattern


    How many gay men would you have met in your lifetime, honestly now? And how many straight men have you met that were raised by a homophobic abusive father or a single mother?

    I was practically raised by my neighbour as both my parents worked, and when they were around my father was an abusive prick, to put it mildly.

    But my elderly neighbour taught me from an early age about compassion and respect for your fellow human beings, truly an amazing lady, and one I wish were around today to meet son as I know she would be a tremendous influence in his life.

    Someone mentioned something interesting to me lately and it struck a chord with me-

    A child isn't just raised by their parents, they are raised by a community. To me that means that while a child's parents are always supposed to be their primary influence, secondary influences such as relatives, friends and neighbours also have an influence in forming a child's view of the world around them.

    Oh yes, the same woman also taught me how to shave when I first started shaving!

    I also have a friend from childhood (my ex-girlfriend) who was raised by her father after his wife died of cancer, herself and her three sisters were all raised by their father who was an incredibly caring man, and my friend has been fostering children for years, she's not a lesbian and none of her sisters are lesbian, but some of her foster children have been lesbian and gay.


    Basically your theory falls dead on it's àrse really IMO.


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    #236
    1ZRed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    shopaholic01 wrote: »
    If it turns out that you're straight and I'm gay we'll have to put it down to being boardies friends!
    You sayin I'm gonna turn you gay? -_- :pac:
    B0jangles wrote: »
    You're attracted to the same sex but not a Sondheim fan?

    FYI you're not actually gay, just straight-unfriendly.

    How unsociable of you.

    You monster.

    :P
    Didn't even know what a Sondheim was until I just googled it there. But I can't deny it. I just hate those durty breeders :pac:


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    #237
    Seachmall
    Registered Users Posts: 7,041 ✭✭✭Seachmall


    Madam_X wrote: »
    If you really want to have sex with women, you'll have sex with women

    Then why is my sex life so shi? Hmm?!


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    #238
    WayneMolloy
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 713 ✭✭✭WayneMolloy


    There is a case in Connecticut of two gay men repeatedly raping two of their adopted sons.

    Rightly or wrongly, cases like that will put people off same sex adoptions. Even if it can be proven that statistically, gay men are not more prone to abusing their adopted sons.


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    #239
    orestes
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,972 ✭✭✭orestes


    pragmatic1 wrote: »
    This deserves post of the day.

    No it doesn't, it's a question that shouldn't even have to be asked.


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    #240
    1ZRed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    WayneMolloy wrote: »
    There is a case in Connecticut of two gay men repeatedly raping two of their adopted sons.

    Rightly or wrongly, cases like that will put people off same sex adoptions. Even if it can be proven that statistically, gay men are not more prone to abusing their adopted sons.

    That's the first time heard of something like that, horrible stuff, but what about the countless times of the cases were sexual abuse has happened at the hands of straight parents?

    I understand your point but I'm sure they'll forget the frequency of the latter when coming to conclusions unfortunately.


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    #241
    Bannasidhe
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 19,219 Mod ✭✭✭✭Bannasidhe


    WayneMolloy wrote: »
    There is a case in Connecticut of two gay men repeatedly raping two of their adopted sons.

    Rightly or wrongly, cases like that will put people off same sex adoptions. Even if it can be proven that statistically, gay men are not more prone to abusing their adopted sons.

    There was a case in Austria where a father imprisoned and repeatedly raped his daughter - impregnating her 7 times.

    Rightly or wrongly, cases like that will put people off fathers. Even if it can be proven that statistically, fathers are not more prone to abusing their daughters.


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