Time to change my life around for the better minus drink.

Carpet diem

Carpet diem wrote: »

No I haven't but I will. I don't even know what to say really. I'll go to the BB one on Sunday near me and another BB one on Saturday if i can find one that's handy..

You need to start sharing, I've been saying that to you from the start at least try to say something.

KeefF

Carpet diem wrote: »

I was thinking through the first step of AA and I think it's good to do it when events are raw in your head. Here it is any ways:

Acceptance that if I continue to drink:
- Life will always be a struggle
- My health will deteriorate
- My relationship with my girlfriend will suffer and that too will end
- My work will only ever be mediocre at best at times
- I will not progress in work
- My fitness will continue to take a back seat
- I will continue to put on weight
- I will continue to feel depressed
- I will become a chronic alcoholic with no control over my life (I have some power to do change things around now for sure)
- I will not have a nice family house with wife and kids
- I will never be happy
- My relationship with my family will continue to worsen (even thou it's ok now it could be better)
- I will not have any money at the end of each month
- I will not be able to save for the future
- I will not have a nice car to drive around in
- I will not enjoy nice things in life e.g trips to cinema, meals out and gigs
- I will not become a better person
- I will not enjoy the small precious moments in life
- I will not get proper sleep
- I will continue to call in sock for work or be late
- I will not get up on time for work, at weekend and end out all day in bed
- My dreams and aspirations will never be a possibility
- I will become worse with dealing with people on a daily basis
- My paranoia after drinking will get worse
- Therefore eventually I will have no job, no happiness, no girlfriend, no proper friends, no money, bad health and a bleak future

I need to accept that:
- I cannot do this alone and need to attend meetings regularly and seek professional advise
- there are gone be time when life is hard/lonely and I will feel sorry for myself
- BUT drink will not solve this and the feeling will pass.
- I have no control over drink and need to hand it over to himself.

Good job getting all that down! Some compelling reasons there.

Carpet diem

KeefF wrote: »

Good job getting all that down! Some compelling reasons there.

Lot of anger and shame on yourself will do that to you and robbed a few from you!!!

Carpet diem

I went to the doctor this morning and she was very nice really.

It really was a big step for me.

She suggested a counsellor, check up on my bloods as I haven't gone to doc in years. Also got some tablets so I'm very sure they will help me and i have a feeling talking in the meetings will not be a problem going forward as frustration has to come out somewhere

I'm looking forward to a nice sober weekend and a meeting or two and will book appointment for counsellor next week.

Carpet diem

Got to a big book this weekend and managed to speak at it. It was tough but good and I think I'll be less reluctant to talk in future. So much to be learned at them.

Had great weekend. Feeling some kinda order to my life and medication I'm on at moment is definitely helping me get sober days together while I get to meetings and do counselling.

Day by day is my motto.

anon1900

delighted to see your doing better, keep it up, we'll get there

KeefF

Carpet diem wrote: »

Got to a big book this weekend and managed to speak at it. It was tough but good and I think I'll be less reluctant to talk in future. So much to be learned at them.

Had great weekend. Feeling some kinda order to my life and medication I'm on at moment is definitely helping me get sober days together while I get to meetings and do counselling.

Day by day is my motto.

Fair play to you. I am trying to ensure I speak/share at meetings and get more involved. I think this is essential for me to continue on the recovery path.
I am considering also what all this means for me - in terms of where I am going in life etc.
Best of luck - you are doing the right thing.

Carpet diem

Carpet diem wrote: »

Got to a big book this weekend and managed to speak at it. It was tough but good and I think I'll be less reluctant to talk in future. So much to be learned at them.

Had great weekend. Feeling some kinda order to my life and medication I'm on at moment is definitely helping me get sober days together while I get to meetings and do counselling.

Day by day is my motto.

Well done, keep doing it will help you so much pal trust me

Carpet diem

Hey there,

I will be sober two weeks on Tuesday thank god. I got to a meeting this evening and I was really looking forward to it - i made it my priority. Got to spend time with gf shopping and what not but I made it clear I had to leave at a certain time. It really comes down to that - just need to go! That wasn't an issue but important to plan is what I'm saying.

I like the steps meetings I must say and I think I will go to another one in the week as well. I managed to talk (pure waffle) but it was my waffle and I'm getting more confident at it and hopefully I will get my thoughts across more clearer as I go along.

It was a tough week - plenty cravings but medication I'm on is great to be honest and is getting me to string days together while I find all the pieces of the jigsaw metaphorically speaking before I put the jigsaw together.

I'm loving the freedom of getting up in the morning. Not spending as much money, getting on well with gf and treating here well. She is a great girl in fairness.

One thing when I was talking in the meetings but I came to the conclusion that I don't know who I am, who I stand for. There was a line about being two different people and I can totally see that is me. Looking forward to the real me whoever that is...(I know that sounds weird!)

KeefF

Carpet diem wrote: »

Hey there,

I will be sober two weeks on Tuesday thank god. I got to a meeting this evening and I was really looking forward to it - i made it my priority. Got to spend time with gf shopping and what not but I made it clear I had to leave at a certain time. It really comes down to that - just need to go! That wasn't an issue but important to plan is what I'm saying.

I like the steps meetings I must say and I think I will go to another one in the week as well. I managed to talk (pure waffle) but it was my waffle and I'm getting more confident at it and hopefully I will get my thoughts across more clearer as I go along.

It was a tough week - plenty cravings but medication I'm on is great to be honest and is getting me to string days together while I find all the pieces of the jigsaw metaphorically speaking before I put the jigsaw together.

I'm loving the freedom of getting up in the morning. Not spending as much money, getting on well with gf and treating here well. She is a great girl in fairness.

One thing when I was talking in the meetings but I came to the conclusion that I don't know who I am, who I stand for. There was a line about being two different people and I can totally see that is me. Looking forward to the real me whoever that is...(I know that sounds weird!)

Great stuff and well done. By the way I totally identify with what you are saying about being 2 different people. I was actually living a 2 different lives almost. During the week, I would be dealing with CEO's/Boards of very well known major organisations in Ireland. I would be responsible for the work of a number of people, making decisions worth €billions. On Saturday night/Sunday I could be in the company of absolutely anyone doing absolutely anything ( I won't go into the details). I would meet people during the week for example who I would socialise with at the weekend and they would tell me I was like a different person. Needless to say that split takes a toll on you. I certainly didn't want to be that person at the weekend but that's where drink led me. And I thought I needed to drink at the weekend to have a life - I am learning now slowly that is not the case. However, I think it will be a long time before I find out who I am - I hope I like him.
Anyway - it's really great to hear you are back on a path you want to be on. keep posting.

Carpet diem

So busy in work these days - good good job that I'm fresh to go or I would definitely crack up.

I really need to get better with mixing with people. Sometimes I get mad at what people say and no need for it. Any ideas?
Sometimes I find chatting to people awkward and I'm keen to try improve myself,

Any ideas? Is it self-esteem, confidence issues or what is it?

KeefF

Carpet diem wrote: »

So busy in work these days - good good job that I'm fresh to go or I would definitely crack up.

I really need to get better with mixing with people. Sometimes I get mad at what people say and no need for it. Any ideas?
Sometimes I find chatting to people awkward and I'm keen to try improve myself,

Any ideas? Is it self-esteem, confidence issues or what is it?

For me, the relationships with people have gotten better as my sober time has increased. I am still prone to snapping and being narky. However this has improved significantly. For me, seeking guidance/help every morning to be the person I want to be - tolerant/respectful/humble/honest/acting without self-pity - has been slowly helping me. I am also focusing on being grateful for what I do have on a daily basis. I am no saint nor will I ever be but I am finding these things are helping me improve and are slowly changing my mindset from that person who needed to go out and get smashed at the weekend. I have also being doing a small bit of meditation which has been helpful to really stop the mind racing.
As I mentioned in an earlier post, I spent 2 hours in a coffee shop on Sat eve just chatting to my Ma. I have always spent some time with her but it usually involved me being sullen/narky/resentful. So this is a very positive example of some of the small improvements I am seeing.
In terms of socialising, I have no issues being around drink etc with people who would not normally see me drinking e.g. work colleagues, gym, family & close friends. However I will struggle around people and in environments where I would normally be drinking - so these for me have to be dealt with caution. To be honest, there is no real need for me to be in such situations at this stage.
I hope this has been of some help to you. As I said before, it is really helpful for me to write it down.

Amazingfun

Carpet diem wrote: »

So busy in work these days - good good job that I'm fresh to go or I would definitely crack up.

I really need to get better with mixing with people. Sometimes I get mad at what people say and no need for it. Any ideas?
Sometimes I find chatting to people awkward and I'm keen to try improve myself,

Any ideas? Is it self-esteem, confidence issues or what is it?

This may sound kinda funny, but an old AA speaker I used to love listening too explained our problem this way: "I ain't much, but I am all I think about"

It means we tend to be selfish, self centered. In that I mean, not that we are selfish in that we wouldn't share our bag of sweets of the like, but that we are sort of locked into obsessing on how we feel, what we're saying, etc, that it seems to get "bigger" in our perception than perhaps it really is.

That is why getting active in helping others is the key, he said it like this :
"when I am helping that sick bastard, I ain't thinking about this sick bastard" (himself, lol).

It works, seems like it wouldn't , but it does

Carpet diem

Keep busy
Rest well
Eat well
Take at least half hour for yourself during the day
Plan and visualise day ahead positively
Laugh at stuff that goes wrong
Have a laugh
Be serious and focused.
Drink plenty of water.
Exercise
Avoid excess of anything above


Few of the core things I need to fit into my day everyday

Sunnyisland

This was an article I found on LinkedIn....it is totally UNRELATED to ALcohol, but it is as if it were written for us...worth the read:

Mentally Strong People: The 13 Things They Avoid


We can define mental strength by identifying the things mentally strong individuals don’t do. Over the weekend, I was impressed by this list compiled by Amy Morin, a psychotherapist and licensed clinical social worker, that she shared in LifeHack. It impressed me enough I’d also like to share her list here along with my thoughts on how each of these items is particularly applicable to entrepreneurs.

1. Waste Time Feeling Sorry for Themselves. You don’t see mentally strong people feeling sorry for their circumstances or dwelling on the way they’ve been mistreated. They have learned to take responsibility for their actions and outcomes, and they have an inherent understanding of the fact that frequently life is not fair. They are able to emerge from trying circumstances with self-awareness and gratitude for the lessons learned. When a situation turns out badly, they respond with phrases such as “Oh, well.” Or perhaps simply, “Next!”

2. Give Away Their Power. Mentally strong people avoid giving others the power to make them feel inferior or bad. They understand they are in control of their actions and emotions. They know their strength is in their ability to manage the way they respond.

3. Shy Away from Change. Mentally strong people embrace change and they welcome challenge. Their biggest “fear,” if they have one, is not of the unknown, but of becoming complacent and stagnant. An environment of change and even uncertainty can energize a mentally strong person and bring out their best.

4. Waste Energy on Things They Can’t Control. Mentally strong people don’t complain (much) about bad traffic, lost luggage, or especially about other people, as they recognize that all of these factors are generally beyond their control. In a bad situation, they recognize that the one thing they can always control is their own response and attitude, and they use these attributes well.

5. Worry About Pleasing Others. Know any people pleasers? Or, conversely, people who go out of their way to dis-please others as a way of reinforcing an image of strength? Neither position is a good one. A mentally strong person strives to be kind and fair and to please others where appropriate, but is unafraid to speak up. They are able to withstand the possibility that someone will get upset and will navigate the situation, wherever possible, with grace.

It takes much practice to hone mental strength
It takes much practice to hone mental strength

6. Fear Taking Calculated Risks. A mentally strong person is willing to take calculated risks. This is a different thing entirely than jumping headlong into foolish risks. But with mental strength, an individual can weigh the risks and benefits thoroughly, and will fully assess the potential downsides and even the worst-case scenarios before they take action.

7. Dwell on the Past. There is strength in acknowledging the past and especially in acknowledging the things learned from past experiences—but a mentally strong person is able to avoid miring their mental energy in past disappointments or in fantasies of the “glory days” gone by. They invest the majority of their energy in creating an optimal present and future.

8. Make the Same Mistakes Over and Over. We all know the definition of insanity, right? It’s when we take the same actions again and again while hoping for a different and better outcome than we’ve gotten before. A mentally strong person accepts full responsibility for past behavior and is willing to learn from mistakes. Research shows that the ability to be self-reflective in an accurate and productive way is one of the greatest strengths of spectacularly successful executives and entrepreneurs.

9. Resent Other People’s Success. It takes strength of character to feel genuine joy and excitement for other people’s success. Mentally strong people have this ability. They don’t become jealous or resentful when others succeed (although they may take close notes on what the individual did well). They are willing to work hard for their own chances at success, without relying on shortcuts.

10. Give Up After Failure. Every failure is a chance to improve. Even the greatest entrepreneurs are willing to admit that their early efforts invariably brought many failures. Mentally strong people are willing to fail again and again, if necessary, as long as the learning experience from every “failure” can bring them closer to their ultimate goals.

11. Fear Alone Time. Mentally strong people enjoy and even treasure the time they spend alone. They use their downtime to reflect, to plan, and to be productive. Most importantly, they don’t depend on others to shore up their happiness and moods. They can be happy with others, and they can also be happy alone.

12. Feel the World Owes Them Anything. Particularly in the current economy, executives and employees at every level are gaining the realization that the world does not owe them a salary, a benefits package and a comfortable life, regardless of their preparation and schooling. Mentally strong people enter the world prepared to work and succeed on their merits, at every stage of the game.

13. Expect Immediate Results. Whether it’s a workout plan, a nutritional regimen, or starting a business, mentally strong people are “in it for the long haul”. They know better than to expect immediate results. They apply their energy and time in measured doses and they celebrate each milestone and increment of success on the way. They have “staying power.” And they understand that genuine changes take time. Do you have mental strength? Are there elements on this list you need more of? With thanks to Amy Morin, I would like to reinforce my own abilities further in each of these areas today. How about you?
__________________

KeefF

realies wrote: »

This was an article I found on LinkedIn....it is totally UNRELATED to ALcohol, but it is as if it were written for us...worth the read:

Mentally Strong People: The 13 Things They Avoid


We can define mental strength by identifying the things mentally strong individuals don’t do. Over the weekend, I was impressed by this list compiled by Amy Morin, a psychotherapist and licensed clinical social worker, that she shared in LifeHack. It impressed me enough I’d also like to share her list here along with my thoughts on how each of these items is particularly applicable to entrepreneurs.

1. Waste Time Feeling Sorry for Themselves. You don’t see mentally strong people feeling sorry for their circumstances or dwelling on the way they’ve been mistreated. They have learned to take responsibility for their actions and outcomes, and they have an inherent understanding of the fact that frequently life is not fair. They are able to emerge from trying circumstances with self-awareness and gratitude for the lessons learned. When a situation turns out badly, they respond with phrases such as “Oh, well.” Or perhaps simply, “Next!”

2. Give Away Their Power. Mentally strong people avoid giving others the power to make them feel inferior or bad. They understand they are in control of their actions and emotions. They know their strength is in their ability to manage the way they respond.

3. Shy Away from Change. Mentally strong people embrace change and they welcome challenge. Their biggest “fear,” if they have one, is not of the unknown, but of becoming complacent and stagnant. An environment of change and even uncertainty can energize a mentally strong person and bring out their best.

4. Waste Energy on Things They Can’t Control. Mentally strong people don’t complain (much) about bad traffic, lost luggage, or especially about other people, as they recognize that all of these factors are generally beyond their control. In a bad situation, they recognize that the one thing they can always control is their own response and attitude, and they use these attributes well.

5. Worry About Pleasing Others. Know any people pleasers? Or, conversely, people who go out of their way to dis-please others as a way of reinforcing an image of strength? Neither position is a good one. A mentally strong person strives to be kind and fair and to please others where appropriate, but is unafraid to speak up. They are able to withstand the possibility that someone will get upset and will navigate the situation, wherever possible, with grace.

It takes much practice to hone mental strength
It takes much practice to hone mental strength

6. Fear Taking Calculated Risks. A mentally strong person is willing to take calculated risks. This is a different thing entirely than jumping headlong into foolish risks. But with mental strength, an individual can weigh the risks and benefits thoroughly, and will fully assess the potential downsides and even the worst-case scenarios before they take action.

7. Dwell on the Past. There is strength in acknowledging the past and especially in acknowledging the things learned from past experiences—but a mentally strong person is able to avoid miring their mental energy in past disappointments or in fantasies of the “glory days” gone by. They invest the majority of their energy in creating an optimal present and future.

8. Make the Same Mistakes Over and Over. We all know the definition of insanity, right? It’s when we take the same actions again and again while hoping for a different and better outcome than we’ve gotten before. A mentally strong person accepts full responsibility for past behavior and is willing to learn from mistakes. Research shows that the ability to be self-reflective in an accurate and productive way is one of the greatest strengths of spectacularly successful executives and entrepreneurs.

9. Resent Other People’s Success. It takes strength of character to feel genuine joy and excitement for other people’s success. Mentally strong people have this ability. They don’t become jealous or resentful when others succeed (although they may take close notes on what the individual did well). They are willing to work hard for their own chances at success, without relying on shortcuts.

10. Give Up After Failure. Every failure is a chance to improve. Even the greatest entrepreneurs are willing to admit that their early efforts invariably brought many failures. Mentally strong people are willing to fail again and again, if necessary, as long as the learning experience from every “failure” can bring them closer to their ultimate goals.

11. Fear Alone Time. Mentally strong people enjoy and even treasure the time they spend alone. They use their downtime to reflect, to plan, and to be productive. Most importantly, they don’t depend on others to shore up their happiness and moods. They can be happy with others, and they can also be happy alone.

12. Feel the World Owes Them Anything. Particularly in the current economy, executives and employees at every level are gaining the realization that the world does not owe them a salary, a benefits package and a comfortable life, regardless of their preparation and schooling. Mentally strong people enter the world prepared to work and succeed on their merits, at every stage of the game.

13. Expect Immediate Results. Whether it’s a workout plan, a nutritional regimen, or starting a business, mentally strong people are “in it for the long haul”. They know better than to expect immediate results. They apply their energy and time in measured doses and they celebrate each milestone and increment of success on the way. They have “staying power.” And they understand that genuine changes take time. Do you have mental strength? Are there elements on this list you need more of? With thanks to Amy Morin, I would like to reinforce my own abilities further in each of these areas today. How about you?
__________________

Thanks for putting this up I think it's very useful and relevant. I have been trying to apply very similar principles to my own life. Thinking about what I want to achieve in all aspects of my life - sobriety, work, fitness, my home, personal development, finances. I've been setting long-term and short-term action plans (weekly) around those goals and reviewing them regularly to see if the actions will or are brininging me towards those goals. If not, I will change the actions based on lessons learned from people who have achieved similar goals. Positive self-affirmation, acceptance, serenity etc are all part of it too which I think is covered in the article.
I love little gems like this.

Carpet diem

realies wrote: »

This was an article I found on LinkedIn....it is totally UNRELATED to ALcohol, but it is as if it were written for us...worth the read:

Mentally Strong People: The 13 Things They Avoid


We can define mental strength by identifying the things mentally strong individuals don’t do. Over the weekend, I was impressed by this list compiled by Amy Morin, a psychotherapist and licensed clinical social worker, that she shared in LifeHack. It impressed me enough I’d also like to share her list here along with my thoughts on how each of these items is particularly applicable to entrepreneurs.

1. Waste Time Feeling Sorry for Themselves. You don’t see mentally strong people feeling sorry for their circumstances or dwelling on the way they’ve been mistreated. They have learned to take responsibility for their actions and outcomes, and they have an inherent understanding of the fact that frequently life is not fair. They are able to emerge from trying circumstances with self-awareness and gratitude for the lessons learned. When a situation turns out badly, they respond with phrases such as “Oh, well.” Or perhaps simply, “Next!”

2. Give Away Their Power. Mentally strong people avoid giving others the power to make them feel inferior or bad. They understand they are in control of their actions and emotions. They know their strength is in their ability to manage the way they respond.

3. Shy Away from Change. Mentally strong people embrace change and they welcome challenge. Their biggest “fear,” if they have one, is not of the unknown, but of becoming complacent and stagnant. An environment of change and even uncertainty can energize a mentally strong person and bring out their best.

4. Waste Energy on Things They Can’t Control. Mentally strong people don’t complain (much) about bad traffic, lost luggage, or especially about other people, as they recognize that all of these factors are generally beyond their control. In a bad situation, they recognize that the one thing they can always control is their own response and attitude, and they use these attributes well.

5. Worry About Pleasing Others. Know any people pleasers? Or, conversely, people who go out of their way to dis-please others as a way of reinforcing an image of strength? Neither position is a good one. A mentally strong person strives to be kind and fair and to please others where appropriate, but is unafraid to speak up. They are able to withstand the possibility that someone will get upset and will navigate the situation, wherever possible, with grace.

It takes much practice to hone mental strength
It takes much practice to hone mental strength

6. Fear Taking Calculated Risks. A mentally strong person is willing to take calculated risks. This is a different thing entirely than jumping headlong into foolish risks. But with mental strength, an individual can weigh the risks and benefits thoroughly, and will fully assess the potential downsides and even the worst-case scenarios before they take action.

7. Dwell on the Past. There is strength in acknowledging the past and especially in acknowledging the things learned from past experiences—but a mentally strong person is able to avoid miring their mental energy in past disappointments or in fantasies of the “glory days” gone by. They invest the majority of their energy in creating an optimal present and future.

8. Make the Same Mistakes Over and Over. We all know the definition of insanity, right? It’s when we take the same actions again and again while hoping for a different and better outcome than we’ve gotten before. A mentally strong person accepts full responsibility for past behavior and is willing to learn from mistakes. Research shows that the ability to be self-reflective in an accurate and productive way is one of the greatest strengths of spectacularly successful executives and entrepreneurs.

9. Resent Other People’s Success. It takes strength of character to feel genuine joy and excitement for other people’s success. Mentally strong people have this ability. They don’t become jealous or resentful when others succeed (although they may take close notes on what the individual did well). They are willing to work hard for their own chances at success, without relying on shortcuts.

10. Give Up After Failure. Every failure is a chance to improve. Even the greatest entrepreneurs are willing to admit that their early efforts invariably brought many failures. Mentally strong people are willing to fail again and again, if necessary, as long as the learning experience from every “failure” can bring them closer to their ultimate goals.

11. Fear Alone Time. Mentally strong people enjoy and even treasure the time they spend alone. They use their downtime to reflect, to plan, and to be productive. Most importantly, they don’t depend on others to shore up their happiness and moods. They can be happy with others, and they can also be happy alone.

12. Feel the World Owes Them Anything. Particularly in the current economy, executives and employees at every level are gaining the realization that the world does not owe them a salary, a benefits package and a comfortable life, regardless of their preparation and schooling. Mentally strong people enter the world prepared to work and succeed on their merits, at every stage of the game.

13. Expect Immediate Results. Whether it’s a workout plan, a nutritional regimen, or starting a business, mentally strong people are “in it for the long haul”. They know better than to expect immediate results. They apply their energy and time in measured doses and they celebrate each milestone and increment of success on the way. They have “staying power.” And they understand that genuine changes take time. Do you have mental strength? Are there elements on this list you need more of? With thanks to Amy Morin, I would like to reinforce my own abilities further in each of these areas today. How about you?
__________________

Great stuff realies.

I'm on day 16 now and holding together fairly well. Work is very tough at the moment and I feel I'm getting too much to do. Working nine to 7 and few more hours when I go home. I need to knock that on the head.

Good job for the medication or I was gone drinking again yesterday evening. There is a few things that are still there annoying me - feeling very sorry for myself and few other things.

Few things I've done good so far :
Eating well and trying to lose few pound
Save a few quid. Have 1k savings on target so far this month
Worked hard ( maybe too hard )
Studied well
Treating my gf well.
Having plenty of money for groceries and petrol
Getting on with people in work
Getting on with mates and even organising trip to cinema with them
Reading a lot on current social issues/economics
Really cut down on take aways
Gym work at weekend
Being friendly to others I come into contact with. Simple how is your kind of thing
Talking in meetings
Holiday in march sorted
Holiday in June sorted



My cons to not drinking for last 16 days are :

































Oh wait there is none. Quel la suprise!!!!


My gf also mentioned that I have come a different person - less narky and more easygoing and hope to continue that .

Edit: Got my meeting in and spoke again. I feel proud of myself for first time in a long time.

I also got number of community counsellor in area that deals with addiction and its a free service so that's a help.

Re speaking I'm gonna bring small note in with me anymore to remind me of stuff I want to talk about as I forget when you are talking .

KeefF

Carpet diem wrote: »

Great stuff realies.

I'm on day 16 now and holding together fairly well. Work is very tough at the moment and I feel I'm getting too much to do. Working nine to 7 and few more hours when I go home. I need to knock that on the head.

Good job for the medication or I was gone drinking again yesterday evening. There is a few things that are still there annoying me - feeling very sorry for myself and few other things.

Few things I've done good so far :
Eating well and trying to lose few pound
Save a few quid. Have 1k savings on target so far this month
Worked hard ( maybe too hard )
Studied well
Treating my gf well.
Having plenty of money for groceries and petrol
Getting on with people in work
Getting on with mates and even organising trip to cinema with them
Reading a lot on current social issues/economics
Really cut down on take aways
Gym work at weekend
Being friendly to others I come into contact with. Simple how is your kind of thing
Talking in meetings
Holiday in march sorted
Holiday in June sorted



My cons to not drinking for last 16 days are :



































Oh wait there is none. Quel la suprise!!!!


My gf also mentioned that I have come a different person - less narky and more easygoing and hope to continue that .

Edit: Got my meeting in and spoke again. I feel proud of myself for first time in a long time.

I also got number of community counsellor in area that deals with addiction and its a free service so that's a help.

Re speaking I'm gonna bring small note in with me anymore to remind me of stuff I want to talk about as I forget when you are talking .

I like this post!!

Carpet diem

Met few mates in pub last night. Needed to just get out and chat you then and home by 11. Work was awful this week and way too busy.

It was tough but just couldn't drink and felt really sorry for myself but something inside was saying you can't get your way all the time you little bas$tArd. I can be very selfish and need to rid myself of that trait. Me me me..
As I heard before :
Poor me Poor me Pour me a drink.
That is what it is like!

Great to feel good and enjoy life for what it is.

Wattle

Carpet diem wrote: »

Met few mates in pub last night. Needed to just get out and chat you then and home by 11. Work was awful this week and way too busy.

It was tough but just couldn't drink and felt really sorry for myself but something inside was saying you can't get your way all the time you little bas$tArd. I can be very selfish and need to rid myself of that trait. Me me me..
As I heard before :
Poor me Poor me Pour me a drink.
That is what it is like!

Great to feel good and enjoy life for what it is.

Glad to hear that you resisted the temptation but seriously why are you putting yourself in that situation where you are going to be feeling under pressure?

Carpet diem

Wattle wrote: »

Glad to hear that you resisted the temptation but seriously why are you putting yourself in that situation where you are going to be feeling under pressure?

I needed to get out and talk to the lads. My head was exploding after work . I wasn't under pressure from lads at all - just my own mind and I knew I had a safeguard.

Wattle

Carpet diem wrote: »

I needed to get out and talk to the lads. My head was exploding after work . I wasn't under pressure from lads at all - just my own mind and I knew I had a safeguard.

Look I'm sorry if I'm coming across as a bit of a prick cos I don't mean it that way. I've been following your progress here and I wish you all the best but you said yourself it was tough and you have fallen off the wagon a few times. All I'm saying is if your feeling any way iffy going to the pub might not be the greatest idea right now.

lufties

I find my biggest weakness is when I come off my final nightshift, after I sleep until around 2pm I don't know what to do with myself and feel like a caged animal set free after being kept out of a social loop. Shiftwork is a bitch, especially 12hrs. The 4 rest days then spent recovering from the first day off on the lash, disgrace really.

Carpet diem

Got myself to a big book again. Great feeling after it when you share but was tough as some stuff I talked about brought up stuff that was tough to talk about.

Anyways all going good and nice relaxing evening ahead without any fear of work tomorrow. (kinda but manageable)

KeefF

Carpet diem wrote: »

Got myself to a big book again. Great feeling after it when you share but was tough as some stuff I talked about brought up stuff that was tough to talk about.

Anyways all going good and nice relaxing evening ahead without any fear of work tomorrow. (kinda but manageable)

Well done! It does feel good.
I managed to share at 3 meetings this week - which is progress.
Keep up the good work.

Carpet diem

KeefF wrote: »

Well done! It does feel good.
I managed to share at 3 meetings this week - which is progress.
Keep up the good work.

Well done KeefF you're flying it- speaking is key as is listening and putting stuff into action.

Well done lads, keep it up.

Yarray

Guys .... I have read yer posts, every one of them, ALL 22 pages of them!!!...

Can I begin off my thanking you all for the advice and the words of wisdom you have shared, but most importantly - for being open, honest and brave!

I will share a bit about myself some other time but what I have to say next is the first time I have EVER said or typed this .......

I am an Alcoholic!!

..... There!! - phew!!

I have been drinking for the last 20 years and you would not believe the stunts I've pulled to ensure that I wasn't more than a few feet away from a drink.

I seldom had hangovers - always up with the lark - but that was a result of a carefully thought out and executed plan.... I very seldom got absolutely hammered - as not knowing my surroundings or what I was doing FREAKED me out. But I always had to have a drink - always - once the evening set it - I would be looking for the bottle.... Habit I suppose - but I have been booze free since the 30th of December and I feel great!! I have a fair bit to work on but baby steps.

The thoughts of an AA meeting fills me with dread as I am a solidarity enough kinda guy .... But its something that I am not adverse to.

Anyways just wanted to say THANK YOU to all contributors again and hang in there.

Y

xzanti

Congratulations Yarray.. you sound like you've reached a big milestone in your life..

I wish you every success welcome to the thread..

lufties

Yarray wrote: »

Guys .... I have read yer posts, every one of them, ALL 22 pages of them!!!...

Can I begin off my thanking you all for the advice and the words of wisdom you have shared, but most importantly - for being open, honest and brave!

I will share a bit about myself some other time but what I have to say next is the first time I have EVER said or typed this .......

I am an Alcoholic!!

..... There!! - phew!!

I have been drinking for the last 20 years and you would not believe the stunts I've pulled to ensure that I wasn't more than a few feet away from a drink.

I seldom had hangovers - always up with the lark - but that was a result of a carefully thought out and executed plan.... I very seldom got absolutely hammered - as not knowing my surroundings or what I was doing FREAKED me out. But I always had to have a drink - always - once the evening set it - I would be looking for the bottle.... Habit I suppose - but I have been booze free since the 30th of December and I feel great!! I have a fair bit to work on but baby steps.

The thoughts of an AA meeting fills me with dread as I am a solidarity enough kinda guy .... But its something that I am not adverse to.

Anyways just wanted to say THANK YOU to all contributors again and hang in there.

Y

Glad we could be of help, I found this forum has helped me lots too.

That's fantastic progress mate feel free to chat on here.