Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Why do you want to be thinner?

  • 03-04-2012 1:08am
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,698 ✭✭✭✭Princess Peach


    Sooo much talk of weight loss and diets in the Ladies Lounge. What your goal weight is, how many points you ate today, you want a takeaway but you can;t have it, you had a takeaway and now feel guilty.

    What are your reasons to want to lose weight? Is it to be healthier because you believe you are overweight, is it because you feel unhappy with how you look, do you compare yourself to other girls?

    Beauty is a lot more than weight, and more women need to realise this. I'm not saying eating healthy and exercise is bad, but who cares if you want a slice of cake, gain a couple of pounds here and there. We need to learn to love our bodies for what they are, and not worry constantly about changing them to fit into what society "expects."

    I give this advice and ask these questions as a girl who has an unhealthy obsession with food and diets and body image. Not sure if I will ever recover but I'm trying. And I spent far too much time worrying about weight when I should have been enjoying life. Its an easy habit to fall into, even to just a small extent. Try and take note of how often food/diet/weight/put downs come up in your conversations and thoughts, especially with other women.


«134567

Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,118 ✭✭✭Babybuff


    Sooo much talk of weight loss and diets in the Ladies Lounge. What your goal weight is, how many points you ate today, you want a takeaway but you can;t have it, you had a takeaway and now feel guilty.

    What are your reasons to want to lose weight? Is it to be healthier because you believe you are overweight, is it because you feel unhappy with how you look, do you compare yourself to other girls?

    Beauty is a lot more than weight, and more women need to realise this. I'm not saying eating healthy and exercise is bad, but who cares if you want a slice of cake, gain a couple of pounds here and there. We need to learn to love our bodies for what they are, and not worry constantly about changing them to fit into what society "expects."

    I give this advice and ask these questions as a girl who has an unhealthy obsession with food and diets and body image. Not sure if I will ever recover but I'm trying. And I spent far too much time worrying about weight when I should have been enjoying life. Its an easy habit to fall into, even to just a small extent. Try and take note of how often food/diet/weight/put downs come up in your conversations and thoughts, especially with other women.
    My body is my temple :o cheesy I know but I'm fairly conscious of what I put into it but only because I developed digestive problems in my late twenties and it got to the point where I was unable to eat very much without food causing pain. Consequently I lost a lot of weight and at that point I became unhappy with my body. I lost more than fat, I lost a lot of muscle tissue and was very very weak, I had no tone and I looked like a saggy used shopping bag so I started looking into developing strength and building my self esteem again.
    I used to be competitively athletic up until my mid/late teens and I missed it, the pma, the physical strength and how I felt about myself so I started on a road to regain some of that and started with weight training. At the same time I began learning how to feed my body right and educated myself nutritionally.

    I do eat cake occasionally :) even though it's bad for me and I would probably have to take painkillers after it but I enjoy the feeling I get from eating right and working out too. My body is not exactly ms universe type of stuff (and it never will be) but I like having goals and aside from everything else, I'd like to be able to use it for another while yet.


    tldr: I wouldnt care if I was 12st and fit, as long as I felt good about myself


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6 Sparklebutt


    Even though I could stand to lose some weight I've always been healthy. I want to continue being healthy and as I get older, I feel like it's just a matter of time until my poor choices catch up with me.

    Plus I'd like to feel like I'm hot! :pac:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,357 ✭✭✭Fiona


    I just want to be fit and healthy. Plus it would be nice to be able to be comfortable in clothes and not bet into them :o


  • Moderators, Arts Moderators Posts: 17,231 Mod ✭✭✭✭Das Kitty


    Since I was about 16 I had always wanted to be thinner. At that time I did compare myself to other girls, I was a 12 and they were a 10. I felt fat. I put on a lot of weight when I moved out of home and was up to a size 18 by the time I was 22. I got back to a size 14 and stayed around that mark until I got pregnant at 29. It was after I had the baby that I was diagnosed with depression and started seeing a therapist.

    It wasn't until I was done seeing the therapist that I realised that I was happy with how I looked. I was a size 16 and three stone overweight but it didn't bother me anymore and I didn't worry about it. Then I decided that I'd like to get to a healthy BMI and I found that it is actually easy when you like yourself and are kind to yourself.

    I always thought that I'd be happy if I was thinner, turns out I was able to be thinner because I was happy.

    The reasons I wanted to lose weight are as follows in no particular order:
    - To get the most out of my body, I plan on needing it for a long time.
    - I didn't want to be thought of as fat anymore (by myself or anyone else). I don't want to be conspicuous for my weight.
    - I want to be desired, most people do.
    - I want to see an outfit on someone and think that I could wear that.
    - I no longer want to start sentences with "If I was slimmer..."

    Dunno if any of this answers your question PP...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26,928 ✭✭✭✭rainbow kirby


    Dropping from my current 68kg to around 60-62kg will help me in terms of hitting my goal for the year of a 1:45 half-marathon. :pac:


  • Advertisement
  • Closed Accounts Posts: 678 ✭✭✭ihsb


    I am a 12, I was an 8 around two years ago after a tough breakup I put all my energy into working out and eating healthy. I was no happier with my body then as I am now. In fact I look back and I wish I had noticed how slim I was.

    I was deffo not unhealthy but when I put some of the weight back on, I happened to be a my doctors. She told me I looked much better with meat on my bones. That has stuck with me.

    I fluctuate. I hate gyms, but I go the odd time. I do pilates and burlesque classes every week and also go to the odd salsa class. It is fun, you meet people and without you noticing it tones you up.

    Thats what it is for me. I eat all the things I shouldn't in moderation, but if I am healthy enough, and toned I really don't care what my size is. I dress to what suits my shape at that time and it works for me. :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 204 ✭✭wivy



    Plus I'd like to feel like I'm hot! :pac:

    Snap. I just feel so much more confident when I'm in good shape and toned up. I recently saw some pics of myself where I'd put on a bit of weight and it really really got me down...
    have been tryin to tone up since and it really is a huge confidence booster.. esp when you get compliments from guys.. I know that could sound really shallow but I really feel how I look is strongly correlated with my self-esteem and my confidence.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,390 ✭✭✭Stench Blossoms


    I had a health check in work and was told that if I put on another pound I'd be borderline overweight. I think that was the beginning of my downfall. (To be fair, I wasn't overweight. I was a size 10 at 5'1)

    I stopped eating crap food and ya know what, I'm a much healthier weight and a lot fitter but all I think about now is food and training.

    My life is now consumed with how many calories are in food. I feel a bit sick when I look at people who could do with losing a few lbs tucking into a cake or bar everyday of the week. It's their bodies and they can eat what they want but it's just this niggling feeling I have.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,091 ✭✭✭dearg lady


    I'm lucky to be quite slim, but I always wanted to lose weight, I never felt thin enough. A few years ago I started dieting and lost half a stone, I felt that I looked amazing but I didn't like myself, I felt guilty with practically every mouthful of food I ate. This was very strange for me, I've always enjoyed food. Anyway, I decided it wasn't worth it, and I stopped 'dieting' but I do like being healthy, so my diet overall is quite good, but it always had been, and I was healthy before, I just wanted to be skinnier because I thought it was more beautiful!
    I exercise regularly but that has nothing to do with losing weight, the more I burn, the more I eat anyway :)
    I'm finally, age 28, beginning to like and accept my body. I still have good days and bad days, but I know I'll look back in 10 years time and think wow I looked amazing then, so I'm trying to appreciate it now, instead of beating myself up about it!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,128 ✭✭✭cynder


    I was a size 8/10 and 32a boobs and I was 8 stone up until I had my daughter 12 years ago at the age of 19. I went up to a size 12 34b boobs after I had her and people commented on how healthy I looked. ( I used to be very scrawny) At 25 I had my next baby and he was 5 weeks premature I lost the weight within 2 weeks, 7 months later I was pregnant again after he was born I was 10 stone 5. I gained 2 stone over the last 5 years but remained a size 14 but last year I did buy a few size 16 items.


    At Christmas I got the flu and lost 5lb and that kick started my diet. Since then I lost 2stone however I did put on 2lb last week... I've started walking 10k once a week and doing 5 k twice or more a week. I now fit into size 12s. Am I happy YES, however I do feel guilty if I have an ice cream or cake. I start kickboxing this evening always wanted to do that but with the excess weight I never took it up.

    Why did I lose the weight? I felt like it, no because the media said I was fat but I just got a notion after I lost weight with the flu and kept it up. I tried dieting before but never lost more than 6 pounds and I accepted that I was meant to be built that way.

    I was out walking on Sunday and someone beeped going past me, I took it they were beeping at my fine figure. Tbh I have no idea why they beeped but it's a nice thought......


    I'm now walking 10k in under 1 hour and 30 mins....


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 32 cremeeggeater


    Fitness is the main reason for me. I don't care what weight I am provided its nicely toned muscle. :) I have terrible eating habits and lately I've been uping my exercise to try and achieve my ideal body. I'm a long way off but hopefully I'll see improvement soon and I'll gain more confidence if I'm happy with my body :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 608 ✭✭✭Mollyd90


    I want more energy, feel better about myself, be healthier as I get older, be able to buy nicer clothes.
    Being 5ft 1 and a size 16/18 I find it hard to buy nice clothes. on top of trying to get clothes that suit my body type I have to think about back fat, muffin top etc. Being top heavy I'm supposed to buy tailored, fitted clothes on top which is hard to find when the majority of clothes are made for pear shaped thin women. Also when you get to a size 18 clothes get a lot longer which is no help to a short person like me.. love to know why clothes manufacturer thinks only tall people are fat?


  • Posts: 50,630 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    I don't necessarily want to be skinny. But I do want to be thinner definitely. It's not to do with health in all honesty. I'm relatively healthy. I eat well, I don't smoke, I exercise very regularly for the mostpart. But I eat too way much - I just love food!!! I am very conscious of cellulite and stretchmarks. I've a half decent shape, thankfully, hips, boobs, small waist. I just wouldn't mind it being more toned and having less cellulite - that would automatically take me down a stone I reckon and I think I would be happy enough with that.

    I wouldn't mind being overweight if I was 95% happy with my body - whatever size that may be - but I'm not, not by a longshot. I am learning to be less self conscious and as I get older that gets easier.

    I totally agree though, we are too hard on ourselves, men and women alike, most of us will always find something to dislike when other people don't even notice it!

    What bugs the crap out of me though, is that, why, if I'm so unhappy with my body, is it so difficult for me just to cop on and sort it out? It really gets to me and yet I'll continue to go on like this forever no doubt!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,195 ✭✭✭✭Michellenman


    I'm the happiest with my figure than I think I've ever been before in my life.
    I moved abroad to France nearly 18 months ago and tbh, student meals of pasta and rice and all the lovely french bread really caught up with me. I gained about half a stone and in total cliché'd manner it went straight on to my thighs and stomach. I was bloated and uncomfortable and frankly, I couldn't really stand to look at myself. I was constantly trying to hold my stomach in or to stand in such a way to make me look my slimmest. I got home for Christmas and some pictures taken over that time were real eye openers for me. It was those picturs and someone repeatedly calling me 'chubby' that were my motivation.

    When I retured to France that january I stopped buying Bread, pasta, rice and cous cous. Within days I'd lost all the bloaty water weight and within 3 months I'd lost about 22lbs. Did I do it healthily? No. Not at all. Upon returning to Ireland for good I began to put some of the weight I'd lost back on, living at home again meant my unhealthy means of weight loss weren't going to fly with my eagle eye'd mother. As a result, I've had to readjust everything. Now my diet is (fairly) clean. I still don't eat a whole load of starchy carbs because I think I'd be ill if I did tbh. But I've taken my exercising to the next level to compensate for any diet mishaps I may have. I box once a week, strength train 3 times a week and run about 24km each week too. I've got my first 5km race this friday :) Exercise has been my saviour. It clears my head and relaxes me. It lifts me out of a funk if I'm not feeling great and it makes me smile when I see just what my body is capable of and what more it could be capable of. Motivating myself to do it isn't always easy but the sense of accomplishment of lifting heavier or running 5km faster than the last time is unbelievable.

    I don't want to be skinny, I like my shape. I want to stay the size I am now. I've got boobs and a small waist and hips and I'm toning up nicely. What I do want is to be faster physically and stronger physically and mentally. I want to improve my physique and treat my body like I'd want to be treated by a friend. And exercise and diet are, for me, the way to do that.


  • Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators Posts: 4,644 Mod ✭✭✭✭Daisies


    Again, I'm a person who doesn't want to be skinny. I want to be more toned. I know deep down inside that I am never going to be smaller than my current size ten as I have big hips and shoulders and to be honest I don't want to be smaller. What I do want to be is more toned. I want to be able to wear jeans without seeing a muffin top, wear shorts on holidays and have less wobbly thighs.

    I was travelling and I put on a stone in Australia (thanks to Tim Tams, beer and goon) and felt ugly all the time. Spending a lot of time in skimpy summer clothes and bikinis does not help with that matter. When I arrived home and started puting on clothes that fitted me before I left and were now too tight was a kick in the a$$ I needed to look at my lifestyle.

    I've never been skinny, all through secondary school I was heavier than my friends and I was too shy to have the personality to compensate for it and make myself seem self confident. For the past 3 months I've been watching what I eat, exercising (semi) regularly and feel much better for it. This weekend was my sister's 21st and I saw people I went to school with who I probably haven't seen in 6 years. I got compliments for the first time in my life about how I looked (from people who aren't friends or family) and I realised that I look (and feel) healthier. I'm happier in my own skin and I realise that I can still eat treats just not EVERY day, I can still go for drinks but just cut back on the beer (hello vodka :p)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,427 ✭✭✭Morag


    l want more clothes to fit me.
    Ok I know clothes sizes are absurd and even if I did loose the mammy belly which currently stops so many pairs of trousers fitting right or more tops being an option I know there are would be still issues with my wide torso but I would have a lot more options with clothes.
    I also want to be fitter and more active with my kids.

    I have never been happy with my shape or size except for a brief 6 months and then I got pregnant and have not been happy after that due to weight gained from depression.

    My lack of confidence in my shape/size goes back to when I was about 11 and was enrolled in a dance class, one of the instructors made a comment about young girls growing from cygnets to swans and that some unfortunately turn into elephants. She meant me, I had a broad build and looking back, I wasn't a baby elephant, I had just put on the puppy fat the some prepubescent girls do. But I came out the other size with more curves then a swan would ever had and the rest of the classes didn't and I quit the classes and figured if I was going to be an elephant I would stamp about and not care.

    Which pretty much was how i felt/ignored my size and shape for years. But I figure I have another 30+ years in this body and it's not getting any younger so I have to try and get it into good nick so it will last me.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,129 ✭✭✭LenaClaire


    I am never going to be skinny and I accept this. My shoulders and rib-cage are very broad (my doctor said my lungs are 30% larger than most women) and I have a very large bust line but my hips are normal. My tops are always a couple sizes larger than my pants due to this.

    When I am at the thinnest my body can go with out starving I am still only down to about a size 10. I am not sure if it is due to lots of dance and martial arts when I was younger or due to all the steroids I took for asthma but I am very muscular for my size.

    I want to get down to a size 12 for several reasons. I feel better at that weight. I have more energy and I have more confidence. I want to be able to buy clothes and not worry about how my tummy looks or how my arms look. It is also hard to find clothes that are not clothes for old women when you get to a certain size and it is really frustrating. And I also just don't want to be the fat one in all the photos.

    So 50% health and 50% just feeling gross and unattractive for getting this big.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,698 ✭✭✭✭Princess Peach


    I had a health check in work and was told that if I put on another pound I'd be borderline overweight. I think that was the beginning of my downfall. (To be fair, I wasn't overweight. I was a size 10 at 5'1)

    I stopped eating crap food and ya know what, I'm a much healthier weight and a lot fitter but all I think about now is food and training.

    My life is now consumed with how many calories are in food. I feel a bit sick when I look at people who could do with losing a few lbs tucking into a cake or bar everyday of the week. It's their bodies and they can eat what they want but it's just this niggling feeling I have.

    Do you think you would be happier if food was not such an obsession for you?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,390 ✭✭✭Stench Blossoms


    Do you think you would be happier if food was not such an obsession for you?

    For sure. I was happy out going to the gym and not really being bothered about how many calories I was consuming before the nurse told me I was getting overweight.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,091 ✭✭✭dearg lady


    For sure. I was happy out going to the gym and not really being bothered about how many calories I was consuming before the nurse told me I was getting overweight.

    It seems bizarre that you would be overweight at a size 10, may I ask what she was basing this on? Some measures are so rough, they can be incorrect...


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 204 ✭✭wivy


    BMIGraphBBC.gif

    BMI - Body Mass Index


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,390 ✭✭✭Stench Blossoms


    dearg lady wrote: »
    It seems bizarre that you would be overweight at a size 10, may I ask what she was basing this on? Some measures are so rough, they can be incorrect...

    BMI.

    ^^^ and that one up there would have put me at the higher end of normal.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 22,819 ✭✭✭✭g'em


    Ugh, BMI is a guideline that's useful for a lot of people but it can be taken with a pinch of salt in a lot of cases.

    The hip:waist ratio is a much healthier guide.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,675 ✭✭✭beeftotheheels


    wivy wrote: »
    BMIGraphBBC.gif

    Is the apricot underweight or the white? I think the apricot but then I don't see why white needs to be a different color.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,091 ✭✭✭dearg lady


    BMI.

    I thought as much. Well I would tend to take BMI with a pinch of salt, it can be useful, but there's so many factors it doesn't take into account. I have quite a number of healthy friends who would be in the 'underweight' category.

    I'm no expert so I wouldn't give advice, but there's so many different measures, I wouldn't rely solely on BMI!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,091 ✭✭✭dearg lady


    g'em wrote: »
    Ugh, BMI is a guideline that's useful for a lot of people but it can be taken with a pinch of salt in a lot of cases.

    The hip:waist ratio is a much healthier guide.

    ha, how funny that we both used 'pinch of salt' expression in reference to BMI. I don't even like salt! :P


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,390 ✭✭✭Stench Blossoms


    dearg lady wrote: »
    I thought as much. Well I would tend to take BMI with a pinch of salt, it can be useful, but there's so many factors it doesn't take into account. I have quite a number of healthy friends who would be in the 'underweight' category.

    I'm no expert so I wouldn't give advice, but there's so many different measures, I wouldn't rely solely on BMI!

    Oh yeah I know it's not an accurate measurement but it was just being told, by a health 'professional' that I needed to lose weight that got me worrying about calories etc.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,091 ✭✭✭dearg lady


    Oh yeah I know it's not an accurate measurement but it was just being told, by a health 'professional' that I needed to lose weight that got me worrying about calories etc.

    Yeah, it's pretty poor form, and honestly laziness on the part of the professional too, to just rely on this one measurement, which is well known to be a very basic guideline.
    I hope you're not too stressed about calories, it sucks worrying about everything you eat.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,390 ✭✭✭Stench Blossoms


    dearg lady wrote: »
    Yeah, it's pretty poor form, and honestly laziness on the part of the professional too, to just rely on this one measurement, which is well known to be a very basic guideline.
    I hope you're not too stressed about calories, it sucks worrying about everything you eat.

    Ya know, I'm pretty sure the worrying about calories is down to some sort of control issues I have.

    I find it very hard though to not count calories and don't really like eating food that don't have an obvious calories content. Mainly because it was eating these foods that made me a little pudgy in the first place.


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,698 ✭✭✭✭Princess Peach


    Oh yeah I know it's not an accurate measurement but it was just being told, by a health 'professional' that I needed to lose weight that got me worrying about calories etc.

    One of the things that spurred me on was after I had been sick a few months and lost a lot of weight very unhealthily, and afterwards started on the pill, my doctor told me to watch my weight as I was slightly overweight.

    If I remember correctly I was living off fruit and energy drinks at the time! But it was her first time weighing me and she never asked any questions, just said it.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,390 ✭✭✭Stench Blossoms


    One of the things that spurred me on was after I had been sick a few months and lost a lot of weight very unhealthily, and afterwards started on the pill, my doctor told me to watch my weight as I was slightly overweight.

    If I remember correctly I was living off fruit and energy drinks at the time! But it was her first time weighing me and she never asked any questions, just said it.

    Another thing that recently happened me was in the canteen here in work. I took a fairly decent size bowl of porridge and a staff member said 'that girl needs a bucket' to another person - implying that I was eating too much.

    She doesn't know what kinda issues I have about food and it was really innapropriate for her to say something like that. I've since stopped eating there and have my breakfast before I go to work.


  • Posts: 0 CMod ✭✭✭✭ Eleanor Attractive Pension


    Another thing that recently happened me was in the canteen here in work. I took a fairly decent size bowl of porridge and a staff member said 'that girl needs a bucket' to another person - implying that I was eating too much.

    She doesn't know what kinda issues I have about food and it was really innapropriate for her to say something like that. I've since stopped eating there and have my breakfast before I go to work.

    wha?
    i thought it meant "wow she needs to eat a bucket full of porridge she's skinny"


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4 lynch10


    i've always struggled with my weight, but i know why to this day i count calories, skip meals etc.
    when i was 7 i overheard my father tell my mother that i was a very fat child. completely untrue and very hurtful but he said it! these kind of comments continued throughout my teens and right up until the day i left home at 21.
    thus started a lifetime of a very unhealthy relationship with food.

    i try very hard to not let it get to me, and i have had counselling because of it. nothing seems to work, perhaps because i know in my heart i will never truly forgive him and cannot move past it.

    i suppose it must be lovely to want to be thin for healthy positive reasons. cos it totally sucks to want to be thin so you feel loved or meet someone's opinion of approval.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 31,974 ✭✭✭✭Mars Bar


    I used to be between a size 8 and 10 when I started in secondary school. As time went on, I gave up more sports and ate more and the weight crept on. I remember weighing in at around 64kg in 5th year. I was between a 12 and 14 all throughout college until 3rd year and I put on a load of weight due to medication and generally being miserable. I was 68kg last April at my heaviest and for my 4ft11 frame, that was way too heavy.

    I've worked hard it over the summer and now I'm playing football and working out and putting on muscle. I'm between 59kg and 60kg now. My aim is 55kg but depending on muscle, I could be 57kg and look good so I'm not too worried about numbers.

    I've never done so much running around in my life and yet I'm not loosing weight according to the scales. However, my shape has changed for the better so I'm taking that as a positive.

    I want to be healthy, I want to look good and I want my shopping experiences to be a lot less harrowing than they currently are! :pac:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,675 ✭✭✭beeftotheheels


    Another thing that recently happened me was in the canteen here in work. I took a fairly decent size bowl of porridge and a staff member said 'that girl needs a bucket' to another person - implying that I was eating too much.

    She doesn't know what kinda issues I have about food and it was really innapropriate for her to say something like that. I've since stopped eating there and have my breakfast before I go to work.

    Sweetie you need to take a step back. As Bluewolf has pointed out the comment could have been interpreted in two ways and you heard the negative one.

    Your struggle with calories and the fact that you have difficulty watching other people eat, the fact that you're doing your own eating in private because you don't want to be judged for eating too much (when in reality you might be eating too little) is all very familiar to me.

    At what point a healthy diet crosses into an unhealthy obsession I have no idea. I know it certainly can't be measured by any particular weight loss matrix. A person starting at 70 kg could have crossed into problem territory while still being a healthy weight whereas a person starting at 50 kg might still be mentally fine even though their weight is unhealthy.

    It might be an idea for you to talk to someone, to try and figure out where the line is for you and which side of it you are on.

    Because if you cross the line, and I have no idea where that line is for anyone other than me, it is very difficult to get back the right side of it.

    I don't mind what other people eat now. I don't count calories. I don't mind eating a steak in public if that's what I feel like eating.

    Yet if I step on a thread mill I expect that regardless of how long since I last ran I will run 5km in 30 minutes, my mind makes it so and my body has no say in the matter.

    I don't let my BMI go above 18.5 or under 17 (tends to stay at 18.3 or so). I don't think about it consciously (I do at 17, then I make an effort to get it back up) but I know I don't eat like a normal person.

    But this is the compromise I came to with an illness that took over my life in my teens, caused me to wind up in hospital, and over the last 14 years we've made our peace with each other.


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,509 ✭✭✭hollypink


    I have a tendency towards emotional eating and as a result I'm now closer to a 14 than the 10 I'm more comfortable at (and 10 is the size of all my nice summer clothes). So that's why I want to be thinner. I'm quite envious of some of my siblings who seem to eat whatever they want and stay slim, although I know in reality they aren't probably eating that much but rather treat themselves occasionally rather than being very strict. My waist measurement isn't in the healthy range and neither is my BMI so although people have told me I don't need to lose weight, I know I do.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,241 ✭✭✭barleybooley


    I don't want to be significantly thinner, as such, but I would love to be able to wear a bikini with confidence.

    I'm 5'8'' and a 14 on the bottom and a 16 (usually) on top which I don't think is enormous and the only area that bothers me really is my abdomen but it seems all girls in my family get that too, regardless of their weight.

    As for being much thinner, my sister has lost over three stone in the last year and since then she obsesses over her points (WeightWatchers), weighs everything she puts in her mouth, doesn't really go out for meals and has smaller, saggier boobs as result. Oh, and she still has the same flabby tummy we all do.

    Tbh, I'd take my current figure over being tied to a diet for the rest of my life any day. Also, I really love most of my clothes and can't really afford new ones so more's the reason to stay the same.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,698 ✭✭✭✭Princess Peach


    Another thing that recently happened me was in the canteen here in work. I took a fairly decent size bowl of porridge and a staff member said 'that girl needs a bucket' to another person - implying that I was eating too much.

    She doesn't know what kinda issues I have about food and it was really innapropriate for her to say something like that. I've since stopped eating there and have my breakfast before I go to work.

    Friends of mine used to joke about how much food I could eat and how I was always hungry, and how amazed they were at my appetite.

    Don't think they realised I ate so much because I was bringing it back up afterwards (even though I had tried to tell them but thats a different issue altogether).


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,484 ✭✭✭username123


    Gawd, weight.

    Ive been a size 16, Ive been a size 8 - I looked awful at an 8, I got loads of male attention at a 16.

    I became an 8 through illness and stress. I was scrawny and my bones stuck out. I was eating less than 500 calories some days, many days. It would never have been a sustainable weight without constantly being on the brink of starvation and it didnt look attractive.

    I go up and down like the proverbial jockeys you know what. Im usually a size bigger on top due to a large bust, so dresses are always a pain, too loose on the hips, too tight on the bust.

    I spend most of my life thinking 'I could do with losing 10 lb'. You could probably put it on my headstone.

    I like food, I get hungry, I eat! I exercise plenty, Im healthy, but its a constant struggle not to turn into a blimp.

    Generally you can track my self esteem with my weight, the fatter I am, the better I am feeling about myself, the skinnier, the worse!!

    Most friends of my own age who are very slim are constantly denying themselves any food pleasure. They wouldnt even admit it but if you eat out with them you see the control. I just cant live like that. If I want a piece of cake Ill have a piece of cake.

    I had a meal out with 2 friends last week, one of them commented on how much I ate, it was tapas, I thought we all ate the same amount - but suddenly because I was hungry there was what I perceived as a negative comment being made. I hadnt eaten since breakfast that day. I addressed it to her later - she was honestly shocked, she had meant it as a compliment to my healthy appetite. But it shows how our minds perceive innocent remarks.

    Just for context Im currently a 12 on my lower body and a 14 on top. I could do with losing a stone. I dont have the mental strength to suffer the hunger that thats going to take right now. Im hoping for a solid dose of stomach flu :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,194 ✭✭✭saa


    I know I look good but I just want to be a healthy weight so other people will treat me with due respect and see me as a person before they see me as a fat person or someone with a weight issue, I have been a size 14 for a long time crept to 16, last year I was 18 pushing 20 I believe now I'm back to 14-16 even wearing a size 12 fitted coat.

    But I'm not on a plan for a long time I have been changing habits so I can feel my best by taking care of myself, my body will be imperfect but with a healthy lifestyle will in its own time find its own happy place once I get my fitness to where I want it to be.

    I had given up on tracking numbers and thinking happiness and acceptance is at the end of a weight loss plan its not, I am focusing on how I feel now, today and my health and really the fitness thing helps when I can now run for a bus or go for a nice cycle without getting wrecked.

    I thought to myself if I lost enough weight to be healthy what would I do differently, I would feel more comfortable, exercise and eat well or else I'd end up overweight again and then I thought then how the heck and I going to be a healthy weight without doing the things a healthy person does which is not restriction, obsession, time limits etc. but its about finding out what works for you, I used to weigh myself and if I lost weight I'd think I was doing so well I would slack and if I gained or maintained I had failed, that is so ridiculous I used to think in terms of good and bad.

    I lost 20 something pounds in the last year which many people interested in loosing weight would think is really bad I don't I am happy I have made lifestyle changes and maintained a healthier weight and im now not in a yo-yoer.


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,256 ✭✭✭metaoblivia


    I'm happy with my weight and size as it currently is. I make a conscious effort to maintain it by balancing my diet and doing the conditioning core exercises I learned as a gymnast and dancing (badly) to music on my ipod every night.

    It wasn't always like that though. I remember when I was 11-13, I hit puberty before most of the other girls in my school. I felt very subconscious about my hips, boobs and thighs. One time in PE, we were making a human pyramid, and one of the boys referred to me as "sturdy" and not in a mean way. Its just all of the other girls were still in that lanky tween phase and I wasn't, and as an 11 year old, he didn't quite know how to communicate that. But it stuck with me. They were skinny and I was sturdy.

    But then I stopped growing at 13 - my measurements then were the same as they are now, at 30 - and the other girls caught up with me, and I slowly began to realize that being 5'7 and a size 6-8 was really quite slim, all things considered. So I've been happy with my figure since and as I said at the beginning, do what I can to maintain it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,032 ✭✭✭Bubblefett


    When I was young I was very very ill and spent a good few years on steroids. I put on a lot of weight as a result. By the age of 12 I was wearing an adult size 16. I was bullied continuously, some stuff which has still stayed with me today. I asked my mom every day to let me stay home from school- she even tried to get me moved to another school. I had to go to dietitians to try help me loose the weight- until the kids in school found out I was going to one and began bullying me over that. I refused to go see her again after that.
    When I was 15 puberty happened and I had a growth spirt and I suddenly found myself 5ft 11 and a size 12. I was so happy about it. However it was at least another 4 years before my confidence recovered to a point when I believed I wasn't the fat ugly girl any more.

    I put a few pounds since those days, my own fault though- bad eating habits and lack of exercise- but I'm working on correcting it and trying to make myself a healthier fitter person.

    Ran into one of my old bullies a while back. He couldn't believe it was me when we were introduced, said I'd changed completely. Made me feel great, but not as great as when I saw how much weight he'd gained. I love Karma :o:)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,713 ✭✭✭✭Novella


    What are your reasons to want to lose weight?

    I'd like to lose weight 'cause I'd like to look skinnier. While I'm not particularly big - I'm a size 10 and quite tall - I really hate parts of my body. Realistically I know that my body is okay, (could probably do with toning up but I've been lazy on the gym front lately) but yet I can't help but be self critical.

    It's funny, even here I have to tell you that I hate "parts of my body". I can't tell you which parts 'cause I worry that if I ever point them out, people will notice and it will be all they see when they look at me. The way it is for me.

    Is it to be healthier because you believe you are overweight, is it because you feel unhappy with how you look, do you compare yourself to other girls?

    It is definitely not to be healthier because I don't believe I'm overweight. I know I'm not overweight. I could lose a few pounds, definitely, maybe I could even lose a stone but the only reason I have ever wanted to lose weight is because I'm unhappy with my body. This is a real inwardly thing for me too. I'm not the girl who's ever gonna tell her friends she's on a diet and I'll walk around in my underwear like I don't have a care in the world. Deep down though, I am severely weight conscious.

    I compare myself to other girls, sure. Again, it's not really something I'd ever talk about. But I do.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 646 ✭✭✭cactuspaw


    welll, to be blunt, becouse i want to walk into the pub at home and say to all the b1tchs i went school with "look at me now ya pack of tramps!"


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,211 ✭✭✭Susie_Q


    My BMI is fine, I weigh somewhere under 9 stone, but because I'm an apple shape my waist-to-hip ratio is teetering on the dark side. I'm more concerned with long-term health issues in terms of weight; I want to be healthy and have lots of babies in the next few years so gotta look after myself! :)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,080 ✭✭✭McChubbin


    I want to be thinner so I can have the simple pleasure of walking into a shop like Penneys or Dunnes and be able to buy off the rail, fitting comfortably into a pair of jeans without having to go to a specialist shop and get charged through the nose for the pleasure.
    I'm well aware of my girth- I'm currently wearing a size XXL tour shirt and it's straining and rolling up on me-and I know I need to loose at least 2 stone for the sake of my health.

    The main problem is that I'm a binge eater which is a recodnized eating disorder. I've yet to get help on the subject but I've got the number of a dietician handy so with a little luck, I hope to start on the road to recovery.

    In the meantime, I chalk my weight gain up to a number of factors, mainly:
    -Gluttony. I LIKE to eat and I'm not ashamed to admit it.

    -Emotional over eating. I eat because I'm unhappy and I'm unhappy because I eat. It's a vicious cycle.

    -Hormonal contraceptives. Since getting a Mirena coil fitted nearly 4 years ago, my weight has ballooned but getting it out is not an option as to do so would mean a return to crippling monthly torture with no guarentee of weight loss.

    -Medication. I've been on anti-pyschotics since suffering a nervous breakdown 2 years ago (complete with hospital stay) and ever since, the weight has just piled on.

    It's been well pointed out to me that at the age of 24, it's going to get much harder to shift the weight seeing as my body has grown accustomed to being so large. I've tried various diets but they only seem to work on a short term basis and because I have such a hard time with emotional over eatting, I always end up back to square one.

    Food diaries don't work as they make me obsess even more about food and although I might be good for a few months at the most, ultimately, I end up secretly binging and the shame that makes my eatting habits spiral out of control. :(

    I ****ing hate this constant battle with my weight. As a woman of 5"10 height, I should be around a size 16-18 as an ideal figure but currently, I'm inching my way slowly towards a size 24 jeans and 22 top. It's getting harder and harder to find clothes that fit let alone anything remotely stylish and I find myself getting depressed over the fact that I look like a lump of lard dressed in oversized men's clothes, looking ten years older than my real age.

    I'm at a loss over what to do in the face of so many failed diets. The only thing that worked for me was supervised meals. When I spent 6 weeks in hospital, my meals were strictly monitored and had TINY portions divised by the nurses and the weight just FELL off me. I could fit easily into a size 18 blouse.

    That blouse sits in the back of my wardrobe mocking me.

    If I had the money, I'd get a gastric band or bypass as right now, it looks increasingly like my only option.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,357 ✭✭✭Fiona


    McChubbin wrote: »
    That blouse sits in the back of my wardrobe mocking me.

    Don't let that blouse win, you can do it xx


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,107 ✭✭✭booboo88


    Nearly the exact same reason mccubbin has posted.



    At the risk of sounding ridiculous, Im tired of being the big friend, and I'd love to go into pennys and find something that doesnt block circulation to my boobs
    and obviously to have a guy notice me and not just with beer goggles :(


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,080 ✭✭✭McChubbin


    booboo88 wrote: »
    Nearly the exact same reason mccubbin has posted.



    At the risk of sounding ridiculous, Im tired of being the big friend, and I'd love to go into pennys and find something that doesnt block circulation to my boobs
    and obviously to have a guy notice me and not just with beer goggles :(
    I know the feeling of being the fat friend. I have pictures on my Facebook page from where I went to a fancy dress party with a mate and oh sweet Chtulu, I look like a right pig standing next to my skinny little friend. Granted, she IS a dancer but that's no excuse.
    The mission is clear: I need to get up off my ass and do something. The only thing is, I have no idea where to start.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,107 ✭✭✭booboo88


    McChubbin wrote: »
    I know the feeling of being the fat friend. I have pictures on my Facebook page from where I went to a fancy dress party with a mate and oh sweet Chtulu, I look like a right pig standing next to my skinny little friend. Granted, she IS a dancer but that's no excuse.
    The mission is clear: I need to get up off my ass and do something. The only thing is, I have no idea where to start.
    oh theres nothing wrong when theres photographic evidence, I went to killarney for a weekend in feb, i look like a whale :(

    Yea and the bad habits always creep back in, like sugary drinks :(
    and fast food, and irsh mammy size dinners are all my bad habits:(


  • Advertisement
Advertisement