The Online Dating Thread Part II **Mod Warning** Read First Post/or Post 7389

hollypink

Dovies wrote: »

Morning boys and girls!

Maybe its me but I really cant be bothered going on dates! The thoughts of getting ready, heading into town or wherever and meeting someone new and (9 times out of 10) it being a disaster is not appealing to me anymore!! Maybe its just the January blues :rolleyes:

I've been feeling like that too, although I'm not so much worried that dates will be a disaster but rather that yet again there will be no chemistry. At one stage I was genuinely thinking I'd never meet anyone I was attracted to ever again and only for a guy I met briefly the traditional way late last year (i.e. in the pub!), I'd still feel that way.

Fortunately I've never got messages containing photos of genitalia so thats something!

stargazer 68

hollypink wrote: »

rather that yet again there will be no chemistry.
Fortunately I've never got messages containing photos of genitalia so thats something!

I meant no chemistry etc - havent had too many real disasters. Ah maybe I just need one decent one and I will change my mind!

gemi

awec wrote: »

Four! Nice.

Going to hunt later for one with nice eyes then...

Beginners luck, I think. Bit of fresh blood is always appealing I imagine, or at least that's what I'd gather from the two messages prior to me updating my profile with any real personal details or any hint at my personality at all.

hollypink wrote: »

Fortunately I've never got messages containing photos of genitalia so thats something!

Yeah, it's a bit bizarre. I honestly don't know what they expect to happen with that.

Dovies wrote: »

I meant no chemistry etc - havent had too many real disasters. Ah maybe I just need one decent one and I will change my mind!

The chemistry thing is going to be interesting. I did dip my toe in this once before a few years ago, my only ever OD date. I met up him in a bar in Galway after chatting for a couple weeks. We had absolutely no chemistry in person at all, I'm sure the fact that we were the only two in the bar didn't help at all and that I wasn't really attracted to him. The awkwardness of the whole thing put me off, but I'm back now with a thicker skin hopefully!

hollypink

gemi wrote: »

Yeah, it's a bit bizarre. I honestly don't know what they expect to happen with that.

It's wierd alright, I assume the guys doing it are fairly young and immature? Because if they're not, that's even more bizarre.

gemi wrote: »

The chemistry thing is going to be interesting. I did dip my toe in this once before a few years ago, my only ever OD date. I met up him in a bar in Galway after chatting for a couple weeks. We had absolutely no chemistry in person at all, I'm sure the fact that we were the only two in the bar didn't help at all and that I wasn't really attracted to him. The awkwardness of the whole thing put me off, but I'm back now with a thicker skin hopefully!

God yes, the awkwardness of it is off-putting alright. Last year after a few different 0% chemistry dates, I thought maybe I wasn't giving it enough time so I went on a few dates with one guy and looking back it was pointless really. He was late every time we arranged to meet so I don't think he was that bothered either.

stargazer 68

hollypink wrote: »

It's wierd alright, I assume the guys doing it are fairly young and immature? Because if they're not, that's even more bizarre.

.

Immature yes, young - unfortunately not always!! :eek:

Owen

I finally got a message this morning. Despite my profile saying no pic no reply, and no replys if you use txtspk, I got the most indecypherable of messages a teenager wouldn't write from a 36 year old with no photo.

gemi

Dovies wrote: »

Immature yes, young - unfortunately not always!! :eek:

God help us all.

hollypink wrote: »

It's wierd alright, I assume the guys doing it are fairly young and immature? Because if they're not, that's even more bizarre.



God yes, the awkwardness of it is off-putting alright. Last year after a few different 0% chemistry dates, I thought maybe I wasn't giving it enough time so I went on a few dates with one guy and looking back it was pointless really. He was late every time we arranged to meet so I don't think he was that bothered either.

I think you can know on one date, but I try to give it two if I can at all.

I was asked out by a friend of a friend a year or so ago, we got on really well (still do), I wasn't attracted to him really but figured I'd give it a go. First date was the cinema, and went for a coffee and chat. I kind of knew then, but thought I was being too harsh and we were chatting pretty much daily and he kept mentioning things that had come up in conversations with others about what I'd like in someone or things I had thought were a great idea...it was weird. The next date we were meant to go for food, but ended up in the pub (with no food) and amazingly he was the one that ended up hammered. Although, he was kind of trying to be all over me as a result, which made me realise how much I wasn't attracted to him and the fact that that actually was important. I felt incredibly shallow, but I couldn't help it or force myself to keep it going just because I felt bad. Lovely guy, still friends and one of my biggest disappointments that I just couldn't make myself like him that bit more.

awec

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gemi

awec wrote: »

If you didn't like him you didn't like him, forcing yourself into liking him would never have worked.

I know, that's why I didn't carry on with it. It wouldn't have been fair on anyone. Also make myself was the wrong choice of words there, disappointed that I didn't just like him more would have been more apt, because I couldn't force myself to like anyone.

awec

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itsallaboutheL

awec wrote: »

Can't believe he got drunk and tried to come on to you whilst sober though

That's pretty much top of the list of things i will believe when told.


I'm almost positive a girl is mailing me again and has just changed her username and a tiny bit of her profile. Weird.

gemi

awec wrote: »

Yea and you were doing him a favour too, saves him getting hurt down the road.

Can't believe he got drunk and tried to come on to you whilst sober though

Exactly, and we're still friends. No messiness.

I was quite surprised, because he'd be known as quite the drinker. We only went for couple and he was hammered, although he maintains I got him drunk because we didn't go for food first. Anyway, it was a warning to me to always make sure I eat before any date that involves alcohol, as it can all go downhill quite quickly otherwise!

awec

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Pembily

awec wrote: »

TBH I wouldn't drink enough on a date to get myself drunk. A few pints would suffice, just enough to be sociable.

Wouldn't like her to get drunk either, total waste of time if she does.

I got quite quite tipsy on a date before, made a total tit of myself I didn't plan it, it just happened!

awec

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gemi

Pembily wrote: »

I got quite quite tipsy on a date before, made a total tit of myself I didn't plan it, it just happened!

There's that too. Drunken me, though pleasant I'm sure, picked up a bit of a habit of falling over....which is why it doesn't happen all that often anymore.

awec wrote: »

TBH I wouldn't drink enough on a date to get myself drunk. A few pints would suffice, just enough to be sociable.

Wouldn't like her to get drunk either, total waste of time if she does.

I would have no interest in getting drunk on a date either, it's not really the point. Presumably you're only going to get to know someone, and generally if I'm drunk I won't exactly recall a lot of conversation, so it kind of defeats the purpose. But as Pembily says, despite not being your intention, it can just happen!

I think if I organise a date in the anywhere near future with this, I'll be suggesting coffee

awec

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Pembily

awec wrote: »

Too many wine gums?

I fixed it!:o :rolleyes:

awec

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GrumPy

I told this story to a few close friends, and they thought it was all hilarious, so I might as well share it with you guys.

I went on two dates with a pretty little lady from POF. We had date 3 organised provisionally and everything seemed good. However, date 3 never happened cause I told her it wasn't a good idea after hearing some of the stuff she told me....

Some of that very stuff:

1. She lost her virginity at 15 to a 24 year old (technically this is rape, right?! Also, shes "still good friends with him now")
2. The last guy she was sleeping with, was in a relationship already, with his long term girlfriend of 4 years. She was okay with this though?
3. The same guy seen her out with me during our date 2 (small world), and she told me he texted her almost straight away (he was with his gf at the time) Saying "I knew I couldn't trust you"

Reason he said this (Because obviously I asked!!!) was because she received a text from him earlier in the day, asking her what she was up to later, so she lied and said she was meeting the girls to go shopping? Eh, wat? :pac:

Some other stuff that comes to mind, she crashed her car into a parked van during the week (I wasn't there when this happened, thank god)

She also said from the start one thing she really, really hates, and has no time for is people who lie?!

I'm sure there are some other "odd" things about her that I can't think of right now, but it's really put me off younger girls. I know that's not fair and a huge generalisation, But I'm 4 years older than she was and I'd be far more weary of an age gap in the future, when usually I wouldn't consider it a problem at all!

Needless to say, I legged it. :pac:


Anyway, that folks, was my first experience of online dating. Here's hoping it gets better.

awec

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GrumPy

awec wrote: »

Nutcase.

4 year gap is fine!

Ahh I know, and I'v never considered age to be an issue in general to be honest. I'm 24 in April, if I found an interesting, intelligent, mature, attractive 18 year old, I'd still be very much interested. :pac:

I'd just be a bit more cautious about it in future!

awec

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GrumPy

awec wrote: »

That's 6 years mate...

Whoooops. :pac:

Maths was never my strong point.

awec

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stargazer 68

awec wrote: »

Half your age +7.

24 / 12 + 7 = 19, so 18 is outside your boundary of acceptability.

That's scientific fact, that is.

Hmm so that makes 29 + year olds for me - nah I have to draw the line at 35+

awec

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gemi

awec wrote: »

Half your age +7.

24 / 12 + 7 = 19, so 18 is outside your boundary of acceptability.

That's scientific fact, that is.

Dovies wrote: »

Hmm so that makes 29 + year olds for me - nah I have to draw the line at 35+

And makes 20.5+ for me. I'm sure that half year is really important in the maturing stakes, but I still wouldn't date a 20 year old, or a 21 year old for that matter.

awec

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finipops

gemi wrote: »

And makes 20.5+ for me. I'm sure that half year is really important in the maturing stakes, but I still wouldn't date a 20 year old, or a 21 year old for that matter.

Even though you say you wouldn't date a 20/21 year old would you date say a 25/26 year old but who looked like 21?