The Online Dating Thread Part II **Mod Warning** Read First Post/or Post 7389

ChannelNo5

Ha something like that yeah!!

ChannelNo5

Rattlehead_ie wrote: »

I think its an option you have to pay for. Its in under profile options.

Nope! Can't find it there!

Larianne

Maguined wrote: »

Feel like absolute crap.

Had a lovely second date with an even lovelier lady last Saturday and just did not feel any spark. Letting her know I did not want to take things an further was absolutely horrible, I have done it before and it nowhere near as bad but because I did like this girl, she is everyone I want on paper but just don't feel that unquantifiable connection to take things any further.

Might take a break from online dating, pretty disheartened at this point.

Its a horrible feeling but that's the nature of online dating. :cool: Take a break from it and maybe go back to it in a month or so.

Honey-ec wrote: »

Had a date on Friday, it went great. First guy I've actually fancied - I'm not dead inside, yay! Going for dinner on Saturday to celebrate the end of my exams, I can't wait

Ha, good woman! I had that exact same feeling. "I'm Alive!". Hope it works out for you.

LoTwan wrote: »

Date #4 is organised

Yay!

Rattlehead_ie wrote: »

Out of interest people whats a normal time between emailing a person and asking someone to meetup? I seem to keep mailing people who just want to chat / bored as opposed meeting up

Have you asked people out? I guess it depends on how long your mail conversations are, but I'd say a week of messaging is about right. Having said that, if it is only someone new to online dating they may want to wait a wee bit longer to meet up with someone.

Maguined

ChannelNo5 wrote: »

Hi all. There is a setting on POF that allows you to view profiles without the person knowing you have viewed it? Saw it a couple of weeks ago and can't find it now. can anyone point me in the right direction please?
Trying to fend off a potential stalker but just want to check its definitely him

If you know the name of the profile you can just sign out of POF and look at it without being logged in to see if that is the person.

... and now everyone will assume I am a seasoned stalker. :pac:

hollypink

ChannelNo5 wrote: »

Hi all. There is a setting on POF that allows you to view profiles without the person knowing you have viewed it? Saw it a couple of weeks ago and can't find it now. can anyone point me in the right direction please?
Trying to fend off a potential stalker but just want to check its definitely him

I deleted my profile so I can't check but from memory, isn't it under mail settings? (I may have used it once or twice for similar reasons )

Larianne

ChannelNo5 - If you look up the FAQ its in there:

Log into your POF account, click on 'Inbox', then 'Mail Settings', and select the drop down menu 'Allow a user to see that I viewed their profile' and select 'No'. Remember to update your mail setting when you're done by pressing the button at the bottom of the page.

Larianne

Maguined wrote: »

... and now everyone will assume know I am a seasoned stalker. :pac:

cc181187

signed up to pof about 2 weeks ago and went on my 1st date from it this weekend, read a lot of stuff on here about what to look out for, was just looking for a few dates, messaged this girl about going for a drink, got one back the next day..great.
met her in a busy pub in town but found a table to talk so all good.... girl defo the one from the pics anyway.. but completely different to what it says on her profile,
doesnt like to jump into anything lol..loves a good chat...had to keep the convo going, enjoys reading...last book she read was her leaving cert book but loves magazines:o, horse riding...hasnt done it since she was 13....gigs...she went to oxygen last year..oh dear god.... after 4 or 5 drinks she was inviting me back to her house :eek:, said i had stuff to do tomorrow but would meet her again..
why lie on your profile????

Northclare

I don't know why people lie on their profile.
For some strange reason the ones that say they are not into one night stands, seem to be the ones that are more likely to ask you back for a coffee and a laugh that leads to endless possibility.
Tge sky is the limit

Galvasean

Hey Maguined, if the girl is indeed perfect on paper amybe you should give her another shot? Was it Daisez that popped in here recently that she was in a similar situation to you but went out with her guy again only to get smitten by him soon after?
I'm beginning to think this organised dating may have us focusing too much on this mystical spark which is there from the get go. There's more than one way to fall in love IMO.

LoTwan

I don't get the lying thing either. It makes for disappointment and hard work.

Maguined

Galvasean wrote: »

Hey Maguined, if the girl is indeed perfect on paper amybe you should give her another shot? Was it Daisez that popped in here recently that she was in a similar situation to you but went out with her guy again only to get smitten by him soon after?
I'm beginning to think this organised dating may have us focusing too much on this mystical spark which is there from the get go. There's more than one way to fall in love IMO.

Could always happen though messaged the girl and she said she felt the same so no spark her side either.

Ah sure maybe it's for the best, sure it will be your birthday soon so throw another party and I can chance my arm with The Doctor. :cool:

sharper

cc181187 wrote: »

why lie on your profile????

People easily fall into a trap of writing about in idealised version of themselves, the person they wish they were or aspire to be rather than who they are. "I like to read!" can mean "I never read but I wish I had time/energy/interest".

Online dating hardly encourages people to be honest or critical either, the person presenting the best view gets the most dates over the person presenting the most accurate view. The more accurate person may have better but fewer dates, the other will probably have worse dates but more of them. Dating favours the latter because of the all important chemistry - if you'd clicked with her you wouldn't care so much whether she reads or rides horses.

LoTwan

Galvasean wrote: »

I'm beginning to think this organised dating may have us focusing too much on this mystical spark which is there from the get go. There's more than one way to fall in love IMO.

I am with your there Your Awesomeness.

Galvasean

Maguined wrote: »

, sure it will be your birthday soon so throw another party

Okay.

Maguined wrote:

and I can chance my arm with The Doctor. :cool:

I believe she's fully qualified now - someone to call when the pulse stops. huzah! :pac:

ChannelNo5

Larianne wrote: »

ChannelNo5 - If you look up the FAQ its in there:

Thanks Larianne. Done and done! It was the same guy!!

Having a nightmare on POF. Got suckered by a guy who i thought was really nice and genuine. Turns out he was a total as$hole of the highest order. strung me along and then nothing.

Rattlehead_ie

Sorry to hear that ChannelNo5, seems to be a lot of that online with PoF anyway.

There is one thing to be said for match.com and paying site like that, is that you do seem to get a more genuine person on it, don't think anyone likes wasting money :P

ChannelNo5

Rattlehead_ie wrote: »

Sorry to hear that ChannelNo5, seems to be a lot of that online with PoF anyway.

There is one thing to be said for match.com and paying site like that, is that you do seem to get a more genuine person on it, don't think anyone likes wasting money :P

Its really upset me to be honest. I'm no innocent but it was just all so uncalled for head games and playing with my emotions that was all so unnecessary. Anyway it's knocked me a bit so i'm giving it all up again

Daisies

Galvasean wrote: »

Was it Daisez that popped in here recently that she was in a similar situation to you but went out with her guy again only to get smitten by him soon after?
.

Wasn't me unfortunately

Esoteric_

ChannelNo5 wrote: »

Thanks Larianne. Done and done! It was the same guy!!

Having a nightmare on POF. Got suckered by a guy who i thought was really nice and genuine. Turns out he was a total as$hole of the highest order. strung me along and then nothing.

This only the guy had been an online friend for over 5 years before I accidentally ran into him on POF. 'I want a relationship, I really like you, let's go on a few dates and see how it works being more than friends,' and the last two days - bam, totally ignoring me. Used to talk every day til he admitted he had feelings for me and wanted more than friendship and then bang, the feelings turned of as fast as they were announced. :pac:

Hurts bro.

LoTwan

LyndaMcL wrote: »

This only the guy had been an online friend for over 5 years before I accidentally ran into him on POF. 'I want a relationship, I really like you, let's go on a few dates and see how it works being more than friends,' and the last two days - bam, totally ignoring me. Used to talk every day til he admitted he had feelings for me and wanted more than friendship and then bang, the feelings turned of as fast as they were announced. :pac:

Hurts bro.

Ouch... that is not good

Honey-ec

I think I'm going to delete the POF app until my exams are over. Obsessively checking my phone every 5 seconds doesn't make for the most immersive study experience...

Esoteric_

LoTwan wrote: »

Ouch... that is not good

Not at all! It's more the inevitable loss of the friendship that's going to hurt though! By the look of things, he was just trying to use me for sex. Oh well! Time to go 'fishing' again. :pac:

Polloloca

LyndaMcL wrote: »

Not at all! It's more the inevitable loss of the friendship that's going to hurt though! By the look of things, he was just trying to use me for sex. Oh well! Time to go 'fishing' again. :pac:

I'm sorry to hear that. But unfortunately it seems to be what most guys (that message me) on pof are looking for, and can be quite nasty too when their efforts prove to be a waste.

hairyprincess

I deleted my profile!

For a few reasons, 1) my heart was elsewhere , 2) absolutely no men on there to interest me, 3) creepy ex started messaging me.

So I'm done with it. For how long I don't know, possibly permanently. I'm not into going on countless dates. The next time I get with someone I rather it would be through mutual friends.

Polloloca

Just logged onto POF, and some guy instant messaged me, no photo. I accepted the chat, deciding to give him a chance, and asked him if he had a pic. He launched into a verbal tirade about how he was sick of "shallow minds" on the website, that if it was all about photos then "i wasn't his cup of tea" and whatever happened to talking to someone, and giving them a chance without basing judgement on their photo.

Woah buddy. My first block.

Galvasean

Hard luck all round ladies. There are approximately 4 genuinely decent fellows on POF go see if you can find them! :pac:

ChannelNo5

Galvasean wrote: »

Hard luck all round ladies. There are approximately 4 genuinely decent fellows on POF go see if you can find them! :pac:

Is one of them you?...;)

Galvasean

ChannelNo5 wrote: »

Is one of them you?...;)

Nope. I'm erratic at the best of times.

Maguined is one. That_Guy is another. There's definitely two more. Damned if I remember their names.

finipops

Galvasean wrote: »

Nope. I'm erratic at the best of times.

Maguined is one. That_Guy is another. There's definitely two more. Damned if I remember their names.

*Cough*:D