Half-baked Republican Presidential Fruitcakes (and fellow confections)

BuilderPlumber

joseph brand wrote: »

Michele Bachmann Is Excited For The Rapture!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sWOCpiqMyqY

She's as mad as a bottle of crisps, yet she's a former member of the United States House of Representatives. It really is the 'land of opportunity'. Anyone can make it, even her . . . . or Palin . . . or Santorum . . . or the rest of the religious Republican asylum* escapees.

*insane asylum, not the other kind.

This person looks like Sarah Palin the second. And what with her masculine name???!!! 'Michele' is the Italian form of Michael. The female name is spelled 'Michelle'.

robindch

BlaasForRafa wrote: »

Coincidentally, Oklahoma is a large producer of shale gas....

Total co-incidence, I'm sure.

Still, you can't fault the Republicans for not trying to unearth corruption wherever it might happen. Last week, Louis Gohmert, the Texas Republican who heads up a subcommittee of the House Committee on Natural Resources held a hearing into something he termed 'Zero Accountability: The Consequences of Politically Driven Science'. In a moment of what I'm sure was complete oversight, Mr Gohmert forgot to invite any actual scientists:

http://naturalresources.house.gov/calendar/eventsingle.aspx?EventID=398357

http://news.sciencemag.org/policy/2015/05/house-panel-holds-hearing-politically-driven-science-sans-scientists

Thargor

robindch wrote: »

Total co-incidence, I'm sure.

Still, you can't fault the Republicans for not trying to unearth corruption wherever it might happen. Last week, Louis Gohmert, the Texas Republican who heads up a subcommittee of the House Committee on Natural Resources held a hearing into something he termed 'Zero Accountability: The Consequences of Politically Driven Science'. In a moment of what I'm sure was complete oversight, Mr Gohmert forgot to invite any actual scientists:

http://naturalresources.house.gov/calendar/eventsingle.aspx?EventID=398357

http://news.sciencemag.org/policy/2015/05/house-panel-holds-hearing-politically-driven-science-sans-scientists

“The purpose of this hearing is to hear from real people, mammals called human beings that have been harmed by the federal government,” Gohmert said in opening the 29 April hearing

Poor man is trying to sound intelligent by successfully identifying humans as mammals

BlaasForRafa

A heavy metal fan in Kentucky was held in jail for 8 days because he posted song lyrics on this facebook account. http://metalhammer.teamrock.com/news/2015-05-05/exodus-fan-sues-over-lyric-arrest

An Exodus fan who was arrested for posting song lyrics online is suing the authorities who locked him up.

James Evans spent eight days behind bars last year after he posted lyrics from the Exodus song Class Dismissed (A Hate Primer). He was charged with making felony 'terrorist threatenings' and faced between five and 10 years behind bars.

When the case got to court it was dismissed and now he's suing for wrongful arrest amongst other things

ACLU lawyer Brenda Popplewell says: "This case is not only about Mr Evans' right to engage in non-threatening speech online, but also his right to be free from unlawful police tactics in securing his arrest and prosecution for a crime he did not commit.

"We look forward to representing Mr Evans in this case, and we hope that by doing so we will not only vindicate his rights but help ensure that others' rights are protected in the future."

robindch

UKIP run into a spot of bother with Robert Blay, candidate for North East Hampshire, when Blay explained how he felt about his Conservative rival, Ranil Jayawardena:

http://www.thejournal.ie/ukip-shooting-threat-2086446-May2015/

Robert Blay wrote:

If this lad turns up to be our prime minister I will personally put a bullet in him. That’s how strong I feel about it… I won’t have this f*cker as our prime minister. I absolutely loathe him. [...] I’ve always said in my constituency you could put a monkey out there with a blue rosette on and it would win.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qHLXkDbo6gk

Vivisectus

robindch wrote: »

In a 50-49 vote, the Republican-controlled US Senate (54-R vs 44-D + 2-Ind) denied that humans have anything to do with climate change.

http://bangordailynews.com/2015/01/22/politics/senate-not-ready-to-tie-climate-change-to-mankind/

Great stuff - I propose they vote that sealevels aren't rising next.

Permabear

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robindch

Permabear wrote: »

This post had been deleted.

I suspect less of an "attack" and more of a "laugh".

And in fairness, there's a lot more to worry about with Bachmann and her weird constituency, policies and beliefs than her distinctly androgynous name.

BoJack Horseman

robindch wrote: »

there's a lot more to worry about with Bachmann and her weird constituency

Nah, just her constituency.

F*ck Minnesota.

That's right Minnesotans, I went there.
Come get me!

Hotblack Desiato

Michele Merkin

Wow, there's an unfortunate surname.

Permabear

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jank

Permabear wrote: »

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Wha? I always thought our Robin was dude!

ArtSmart

jank wrote: »

Wha? I always thought our Robin was dude!

Robins are both male and female, but almost never at the same time.

Junkyard Tom

ArtSmart wrote: »

Robins are both male and female, but almost never at the same time.

Also, it was 'Robin Hood and his Merrie Men' not 'Robin Snood and her Sexay Sistas'.

robindch

Permabear wrote: »

This post had been deleted.

Because one fairly recent poll claims 61% of the Republican party take a "favourable" view of her:

http://big.assets.huffingtonpost.com/tabs_Bachmann_0529302013.pdf

It's no doubt a co-incidence that that approval of Ms Bachmann is, broadly, inversely correlated with level of education.

Permabear wrote: »

Just curious -- do you feel "distinctly androgynous" with a username like Robin?

Nope. If you read my post again - carefully, this time! - you should notice that I was referring to Bachmann's name as "distinctly androgynous", rather than Bachmann herself. Apologies if the distinction between a person and their name is unclear

Vivisectus

Hey, but let us not forget the wonderful Christine "Not a witch" O'Donnell

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/10/11/christine-odonnell-snl-spoof_n_758519.html

“If he already knows what pleases him and he can please himself, than why am I in the picture?” -- 1996

Indeed Christine, what good are you to your husband, except as a source of sexual relief?

"America is now a socialist economy. The definition of a socialist economy is when 50 percent or more your economy is dependent on the federal government."

If you dont know what a owrd means, just redefine it!

Also, calling gheys gheys = hitler!!!

Adolph [sic] Hitler once said that to engineer a society you must first engineer its language. Starting with the youth, he set in motion a design to erode the power of words, to steal the significance and beauty of a single word. We can see the unfolding of that plan in our society. Society’s 'sexual liberation' has unleashed an entirely new lexicon. For example, 'gay' has always meant joyful and gleeful. Yet, today, when we say that Ellen is gay, we’re certainly not talking about her emotional well being.”

Also, creationism is scientific:

“Well, creationism, in essence, is believing that the world began as the Bible in Genesis says, that God created the Earth in six days, six 24-hour periods. And there is just as much, if not more, evidence supporting that.”

but science isn't:

“Well, as the senator from Tennessee mentioned, evolution is a theory and it's exactly that. There is not enough evidence, consistent evidence to make it as fact, and I say that because for theory to become a fact, it needs to consistently have the same results after it goes through a series of tests. The tests that they put—that they use to support evolution do not have consistent results. Now too many people are blindly accepting evolution as fact. But when you get down to the hard evidence, it's merely a theory. But creation … ”

and finally, she talks to an invisible friend!

During the primary, I heard the audible voice of God. … He said, 'Credibility.' It wasn't a thought in my head. I thought it meant I was going to win. But after the primary, I got credibility."

Pherekydes

Pherekydes wrote: »

I presume many have seen this on FB already:



Some good stuff in there. She got 67 votes last time out. Could be close this time. God willing, she will get elected!

Oh yeah, forgot the constituency: Fermanagh and Omagh.

This fruit got 166 votes. Good enough for ninth. Out of nine. She got less than a third of the votes that the Cannabis Is Safer Than Alcohol candidate got.

Constituency is West Tyrone, incidentally.

Vivisectus

You gotta hand it to her though: she has avoided all the mealy mouthed, semi-politically-correct beating about the bush in favor of good old fashioned stark raving lunacy. What this country needs is more child-smacking, public executions, and the stoning of adulterers!

robindch

Alabama lawmaker: My bill protects kids from learning ‘they came from a monkey’

http://www.rawstory.com/2015/05/alabama-lawmaker-my-bill-protects-kids-from-learning-they-came-from-a-monkey/

Raw Story wrote:

On April 30, 2015, an Alabama Republican introduced legislation to allow the state’s public school teachers to substitute lessons in the assigned science curriculum with religious teachings.

The bill’s sponsor is Mack Butler, who represents the interests of Alabama’s 30th District at the state Capitol. Formally titled H.B. 592, the bill would see approved science surrounding “biological evolution, the chemical origins of life, and human cloning” subject to religious scrutiny by teachers in Alabama’s public schools.

Butler is now squarely in the sights of free speech and science policy advocates nationwide.

“This is a thinly-veiled attempt to open the door to religious fanatics who don’t believe in evolution, climate change or other scientifically-based teaching in our schools,” Susan Watson, executive director of the ACLU of Alabama, tells AL.com. “It also opens Alabama to costly litigation that it just cannot afford.” [...]

robindch

robindch

After failing to win sufficient support for his policies, Nigel Farange announced his resignation last Friday:

http://www.bbc.com/news/election-2015-32654046

After failing to win sufficient support for his resignation, Nigel Farange announced his unresignation yesterday:

http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-politics-32696505

joseph brand

God Helped Ben Carson Ace His College Chemistry Final By Giving Him All The Answers In A Dream.

Republican presidential candidate Ben Carson was among the featured speakers at the official National Day of Prayer gathering in Washington, D.C. this morning where he told the story about the time that God helped him ace his college chemistry final by providing him with all of the answers in a dream.

As Carson explained it, his goal of becoming a doctor was nearly derailed in his first semester at Yale University when he was failing his chemistry class to such an extent that he would not have been able to pass even if managed to get an A on the final exam. Fortunately for him, this particular professor had a policy that anyone who was failing the class could receive double credit on the final and so Carson asked God for a miracle before committing himself to study for the exam the night before.

But instead of studying, Carson fell asleep and had a dream in which he was alone in an auditorium as some "nebulous figure" wrote out chemistry problems on the blackboard.

"When I went to take the test the next morning, it was like 'The Twilight Zone,'" Carson said. "I opened that book and I recognized the first problem as one of the ones I dreamed about. And the next, and the next, and the next, and I aced the exam and got a good mark in chemistry. It worked out okay and I promised the Lord he would never have to do that for me again"

I'd say the National Day of Prayer gathering is itself 'like 'The Twilight Zone'.

God has a sense of humour, which he has shown us, through the Republican nominees.

Thargor

Don't suppose any journalist there asked Ben why he thought he was getting all this divine attention in order to pass an exam while thousands were suffering and dying around the world at the same time?

joseph brand

Poll: One-Third Of Republicans Think Obama Wants To Invade Texas

A new survey from Public Policy Polling finds [PDF] that one-third of Republicans believe the Jade Helm 15 conspiracy theory that “the government is trying to take over Texas,” and another 28 percent of GOP voters haven’t made up their minds yet about the matter.

The right-wing frenzy over an upcoming military exercise called Jade Helm 15 has swept up the Republican governor of Texas and several other GOP leaders who wonder if the drill is part of a plan by President Obama to seize Texas, impose martial law, confiscate firearms and throw conservatives into closed Walmart stores that have been converted into FEMA camps.

Among Republicans, PPP found that supporters of former Texas Gov. Rick Perry and Texas Sen. Ted Cruz were most likely to believe the conspiracy theory.

These Republicans absolutely love their military and hate to see defence spending cut. On the other hand, they're afraid that the federal government is preparing an attack (with its shiny weapons) on Texas.

oldrnwisr

joseph brand wrote: »

Poll: One-Third Of Republicans Think Obama Wants To Invade Texas

These Republicans absolutely love their military and hate to see defence spending cut. On the other hand, they're afraid that the federal government is preparing an attack (with its shiny weapons) on Texas.

I think this just goes to show how spot on South Park's writing can be:


"Cartman: Oh really? Well did you know that over one-fourth of people in America think that 9/11 was a conspiracy? Are you saying that one-fourth of Americans are retards?
Kyle: Yes. I'm saying one-fourth of Americans are retards.
Stan: Yeah, at least one-fourth.
Kyle: Let's take a test sample: There's four of us, you're a retard, that's one-fourth."

TwoShedsJackson

Thargor wrote: »

Don't suppose any journalist there asked Ben why he thought he was getting all this divine attention in order to pass an exam while thousands were suffering and dying around the world at the same time?

Or why he bothered doing any course work or study at all if The Lord could just give him all the answers in a dream?

Shrap

oldrnwisr wrote: »

I think this just goes to show how spot on South Park's writing can be:

Hmm. Some would consider me a Very Bad Parent for giving my 13 yr old the box sets last Christmas. I personally consider them educational. He needed to know what satire meant, right after he claimed to have the upper hand in sarcasm

Hotblack Desiato

The thought of being treated by a doctor who is both a Jesus freak and a bit crap at chemistry wouldn't exactly fill me with joy.

joseph brand

Louisiana GOPer claims ‘scientists’ burned heretics — Dem smacks him down with DeGrasse Tyson quote

In a debate in the Louisiana Statehouse over a bill to repeal a law that allows creation to be taught side-by-side with evolution, a lawmaker made a bizarre claim that in the old days it was “scientists” who burned heretics alive.

His comments were met with incredulity, stunned looks, and a fellow lawmaker correcting him before quoting astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson.

According to the Friendly Atheist, State Senator Elbert Guillory (R) was attempting to make the case for teaching “both sides” in the evolution/creationism debate when he provided a convoluted version of the history of scientific controversies.

“There was a time, sir, when scientists thought that the world was flat. And if you get to the end of it, you’d fall off. There was another time when scientists thought that the sun revolved around the world,” Guillory explained. “And they always thought to ensure that anyone who disagreed with their science was a heretic. People were burned for not believing that the world was flat. People were really badly treated.”

In response fellow State Senator Jean-Paul J. Morrell (D) dropped some knowledge on the Republican by reminding him of the story of Galileo, as on-lookers laughed.

“Just a quick addendum to my good friend Sen. Guillory’s comments. Actually, you talk about the world being flat and not the center of the universe? [It was] Galileo and it was the Church that locked him up for nine years for advocating that theory,” Morrell patiently explained. “So, although I appreciate your comments about [how] there are alternative theories, when you look at history, oftentimes, when science pushes the envelope, the leading person to lock that person up, is oftentimes religious leaders.”


“I want to say a quick quote that I’ve been saving for this measure,” the Democrat said as he smiled. “It’s from Neil deGrasse Tyson, who I’m sure many of you are familiar with: ‘The good thing about science is that it’s true whether you believe in it or not.'”

This Republican Senator got laughed at. Sometimes it's hard to tell whether they're [Republicans] actual politicians, or actors being satirical. Sen Guillory certainly got some unintended laughs.

Peregrinus

This is ironic, though. Morrell quotes Tyson to the effect that "‘the good thing about science is that it’s true whether you believe in it or not". But he himself asserts that Galileo was locked up by the church for nine years for advocating the theory that the world is not flat, and that it is not the centre of the universe. This is, of course, untrue on two levels. First, the flatness of the world was not in issue. Both Galileo and his antagonists affirmed the roundness of the earth. In fact, SFAIK, a flat earth has never been the subject of religious controversy. And as for the theory that the earth is not the centre of the universe, it it correct that it is not but Galileo's own theory, that the sun was the centre of the universe, was equally false.

Science may be true whether we believe in it or not, but not everything we believe in is science. Just because Sen. Morrell's ideas are not religious doesn't mean they're not every bit as wrong as Sen. Guillory's ideas.

(PS: Is there any basis for Guillory's claim that "people were burned for not believing that the world was flat"? It strikes me as B.S., but it's the one claim that Morrell doesn't contradict. Mind you, Morrell's grasp of the facts doesn't appear to be much better than Guillory's, so maybe I shouldn't read too much into that.)