That time of year again... The dreaded Love Day

Toto Wolfcastle

We don't celebrate it. I don't have a problem with other people celebrating it. To me it's not important.

QueenOfLeon

It always annoyed me that it was so close to my birthday...:( Although there was one hilarious year where my friends organised a dinner before a night out on the 14th where we kept getting pity looks from all the coupley tables for being a big gang :P Ah its a grand day, this year its marred by exams so meh.

Ms2011

Yeah I like it. It's a day to put aside all other stresses in your life for a short time and make some special time for you and your other half. Sometimes life can get in the way of romance, Valentines Day is a nice reminder to stop and smell the roses

metrovelvet

I don't think Valentines is just for lovers. We always did cards to each other in primary school in the US and gave out those little heart shaped candies that said 'be mine' and 'I love you' and 'kisses.'

It would be nice if as adults we did something similar to our nearest and dearest, friends and family, and told them a couple of reasons why we love them so much. We don't do that enough and we need to hear it sometimes.

girvtheswerve

Never thought about it really when in a relationship but now i'm single i'm not looking forward to it to be honest.

Reminder of happier times.

It'll come and go too.

Dolbert

I hate going out for Valentine's Day, one of us usually cooks a nice meal or gets a takeaway and we'll have a beer & DVD night. Neither of us expect a present or anything, though once or twice I've drawn him a comic strip and this year I've ordered Season 1 of the Powerpuff Girls for him as a surprise

jonnieonathan

I don't really mind it. It's just another day, is it not?

I can understand the pressure associated if you're seeing someone, though

new member by the way. Hello :-)

Birdie086

I love all these holidays, i am quite aware that they are entirely commercialised but I am one of those peoples who needs a little nudge to show people they care. dont get me wrong I am extremely generous - if i have a lot everyone benefits but if i am suffering everyone suffers also!!!
My mam is great for putting the spirit into things, even after i had bought my own house i would go back and stay in her house at chrimbo and go to bed chrimbo eve and chrimbo morning santa would have been there!!!! Valentines day I always got a card(from mam of coarse)

OK so it is now commercialised - whats the harm??? the planet needs more love floating around.
this applies in my opinion to most other 'holidays' - especially christmas - I work with people of all different religions and we all agree that christmas is just a nice way to say 'hey - you are important to me, lets eats lots, drink lots(optional), swap gifts and all get together for a good day'

Acoshla

I hate Valentines Day, but my biggest problem with it is that if I say to anyone that I hate it they automatically assume that I secretly love it but my boyfriend won't get me anything so I say I hate it, such stupid logic. I hate hate hate it, I would much prefer my boyfriend to show up any other day of the year with a nice surprise or something than to be stupid enough to pay three times the normal amount for dinner in a restaurant crowded with suckers, or get me the same card with hearts and teddy bears as every other desperate guy at 6pm in Tesco.

For our first Valentines together I told my boyfriend how much I hate it and not to be an idiot and pay a fortune for anything for me, told him to buy me cheap roses in Lidl the next day when they'd all be discounted because roses are my favourite flower and I love a bargain! Valentines Day he shows up with a huge thing of roses, ugh, was so mad that he hadn't listened to me and the he'd wasted so much money.

My birthday comes soon after it and my boyfriend always has to go away for work the week of 13-17 Feb, so I'm going with him on the 15th just for a day out but of course as far as any girl I talk to is concerned we're doing it for Valentine's Day, gah.

Im Only 71Kg

I hate love day.:P

--LOS--

Valentines day is a load of bs, never cared for celebrating it, definitely no presents, pretty lame to be told when you're supposed to act lovingly. People going away for valentines or getting engaged on valentines is sooo cringey.

Up-n-atom!

I'm single so it's not going to be a big thing for me, but eventhough most of my friends are all coupled up they never really make a big deal out of it. I don't think many people go out on the day itself coz it's too expensive, but just do something that week instead.

Talking of being brainwashed by advertising, this year I've decided I'll be taking up that rather attractive "2 DVDs and a tub of Haagen Das" offer, and eating it all by myself:p

shinikins

Cgoodie wrote: »

It's my birthday so there's always a card for me...even if it is from my mammy & daddy:D

It's a bit of a crap day for a birthday at times though because it's not a great night for going out or eating out.

Me too, its always been a bit of a let down in terms of my birthday, and i'm not really into the whole Valentines day thing. My last ex had flowers delivered to my workplace(i think i might have posted about this before, but anyhoo) we had a lovely evening planned, and i was thrilled as noone had made such a fuss over my birthday before. He was to pick me up from work so i waited outside, and waited, and waited, and waited....eventually i got throught to him on his mobile. He had gone to the pub after work. On my birthday/Valentines day, when he knew we had plans made, and i was sitting in the middle of town with a massive arragement of roses and helium balloons in the rain. Worst birthday ever.

My OH now is great, he's of the same opinion that Valentines day is a con, but goes out of his way to treat me. He's not particularly demonstrative, no big bunches of flowers, but he knows that i love Crunchies, so every so often he'll bring one home as a surprise, he told me the other day that he saw a pair of boots in a shop window that he was going to buy for me but he wasn't sure if they would fit so he's bringing me into town to try try them. He makes me coffee when i don't want to move off the couch, and he makes me laugh. To me, these daily reminders that he cares mean so much more to me than a bunch of over priced wilting roses.

parker kent

Valentines Day may be an invented holiday, but most holidays are an invented holiday. The Romans decided Christmas would be the Dec 25th to cynically win over pagans who celebrated the winter solstice at Sol Invictus. So you could say it is an invented holiday too. The only difference with Valentines Day is that it has been invented in an era far closer to our own lives, so we see it as a cynical cash in.

I view it as a nice occasion. Sure anniversaries, random moments of romance etc may have greater meaning, but surely there is no harm in what is essentially an opportunity to have a nice day with somebody you care about? There is no real harm in getting a nice card for somebody/buying a present/going to dinner together/making dinner for somebody etc. Hallmark might make some extra money, but if we view everything with cynical eyes we'd never have any fun.

Though maybe if I was cynical I wouldn't be having it on my own this year :pac:

Khyra24

I hate Valentine's day...it's always so stressful and embarrassing...:( Damn you Hallmark!! You've made my life hell!

Malari

Spadina wrote: »

I hate Valentines Day, but my biggest problem with it is that if I say to anyone that I hate it they automatically assume that I secretly love it but my boyfriend won't get me anything so I say I hate it, such stupid logic.

Yeah, I get this too. Same with weddings, same with babies, neither of which I want. Many of my boyfriend's friends assume it's actually HIM that doesn't want these things, and I'm just going along with it, secretly plotting a wedding and babies and pining over Valentine's days lost :rolleyes:

Just cause your wife is female-by-numbers, matey, don't paint all girls with the same brush!! :mad:

Tallon

I really won't be worried about not doing something special on Valentines day as said already, any other day of the year would be far more romantic

Silverfish

Tallon and Krudler, if you want to have a joke about a poster from another forum, perhaps do it by pm.

Thanks.

Dudess

I think love of course should be celebrated, but not in this way... ew... To me it's not about love anyway, it's just a bit of light, fluffy stuff. Never had time for Valentine's Day, apart from when I was a teenager and stuff like getting cards from admirers. Got a card fom the same guy for several years running - and never found out who it was!!! That stuff is nice - and a little bit intriguing.
I don't get annoyed by people doing Valentine's Day stuff like a meal (but I fully agree it's silly to let yourself be dictated to by a date on the calendar/by companies that make a mint from it) but I do get annoyed by those who take it REALLY SERIOUSLY, it's a fun day ffs - that includes single people who are suicidal when their life is no different the day before and the day after. They're actually the most annoying of all. Those quite embittered "anti Valentine" nights with the girls where they're claiming not to care about it... eh, seems like they very much do care.

And I personally know plenty of guys who feel coerced into observing it.

Count Duckula wrote: »

It's all very well to say that you should show love the other three-hundred and sixty-four days of the year, but the fact is that Valentine's Day gives you a chance to just totally focus on one another. You can't do that on any other day, because then nothing would ever get done. Real life gets in the way.

Why can you on Valentine's Day? It's not like it's a day off...

Malari wrote: »

Yeah, I get this too. Same with weddings, same with babies, neither of which I want. Many of my boyfriend's friends assume it's actually HIM that doesn't want these things, and I'm just going along with it, secretly plotting a wedding and babies and pining over Valentine's days lost :rolleyes:

It's kinda like the "Every woman, from when she's a little girl, dreams of her wedding day" claim.



I'm sure it's true for some, but I can't think of one woman I know to whom this applies... that I know of anyway.

Deedsie

I tried to get opinions from TGC, but to be honest, i would much prefer the opinions of TLL.

How about this, I have been seeing a girl for the last month, I like her. So i wanna get her something that lets her know that. Dont want to give an overly committed gift either.

She said she never got a card in the post before, so I was gonna post her one. Just wary she will hand me one and i wont have one for her. So wanna have something small she will like.

Would chocolates be a bit miserable?

Sarn

The most troublesome Valentines IMHO is when you've just started seeing someone and are not sure what way to go. I've done the dozen red roses, the cards, the Valentines dinner at the start of a relationship, even a Valentines webpage (way back in the day). It was adjusted over time to the other person. The Valentines dinner out should be avoided.

In hindsight, small gestures from time to time make the difference. Although it may be that the little extra effort is more likely to be noticed around Valentines. Now I just see it as any other day, but that could be down to the absence of any perceived pressure.

♥:)

Couldn't resist.

Scarinae

With one of my exes, I told him that I didn't want anything for Valentine's day (I really didn't). Apparently he told his friends this, and they all said "IT'S A TRAP!!" The consensus was that I was only saying this, and would be really offended if I was not given the appropriate presents. Are there people who really do this? No wonder so many people are confused about relationships!

I'm not hugely pushed about Valentine's day anymore, although I'm not as against it as I once was. I just feel that if someone is going to get me a present, that they would get me something that I'd like rather than something that they're 'supposed' to get. Roses are nice and all, but I prefer lilies or tulips, and they aren't as overpriced at this time of year!

The first Valentine's day that I was with my current boyfriend was the day of my beloved grandfather's funeral, so I wasn't exactly thinking about what presents I might get. The next day, however, my boyfriend gave me a collage he'd made of his favourite photographs of the two of us. It was a complete surprise and he'd gone to the effort of framing it and everything

Michellenman

I've had bad luck with valentines days. My first one with my ex I had to have emergency dental surgery done. Spent all day making food for us with a blinding toothache and finally gave in and went to the dentist. Couldn't eat any food!

Last year I was away from the guy I was kinda seeing at the time. This year I'm away again for it.

I don't really go in for the whole expensive gifts and ridiculous gestures of affection. A nice card and a hug is plenty for me.

I realise it's a hallmark created holiday but I still think there's a nice sentiment behind it really (on behalf of those who take part, not the card industry :pac:). It's nice to take one day and make an effort to show those you care about how much you love them

This year I'm away with a group of 5 otheres. 2 are in a relationship and 1 is seeing a girl so us other three are going to go out and have dinner and a movie for fun I don't think they really go in for valentines day in france. I suppose Ireland has been covered in pink ribbon and heart shaped balloons for weeks but I haven't seen so much as a box of heart shaped chocolates here Quite refreshing

magneticimpulse

Michellenman wrote: »

This year I'm away with a group of 5 otheres. 2 are in a relationship and 1 is seeing a girl so us other three are going to go out and have dinner and a movie for fun I don't think they really go in for valentines day in france. I suppose Ireland has been covered in pink ribbon and heart shaped balloons for weeks but I haven't seen so much as a box of heart shaped chocolates here Quite refreshing

Haha I thought that until I visted a female friend of mine in Limoges and we searched everywhere for dinner. Every place was fully booked. Then we found a "cheap" chinese buffet place. It said "12euro" at the door. Went in a ate a little bit. Then woman comes out with bill for "24" euro each. Dont get me wrong it be great if we had a proper meal, but it was just a few nibbles. It was more the fact that there were no signs saying they had increased the price just because it was Valentines.

The French are a weird bunch. They are all show and displays of affection in public, but in private its the complete opposite.

Make sure you book a place for dinner...even in France.

I might be heading up your direction for it towards Nantes.

cdaly_

Michellenman wrote: »

I suppose Ireland has been covered in pink ribbon and heart shaped balloons for weeks but I haven't seen so much as a box of heart shaped chocolates here Quite refreshing

Nah, Ireland's all covered in Easter eggs already instead! :mad:

The only thing I like about this time of year is the amount of red stuff available in shops.
Me and the boy will not be doing anything.

Deedsie

Deedsie wrote: »

She said she never got a card in the post before, so I was gonna post her one. Just wary she will hand me one and i wont have one for her. So wanna have something small she will like.

Would chocolates be a bit miserable?

The posted card bit, sounds like a definite hint.
I'd run with it, of I were you.
Chocolate is a good something small. They might be more personal if you make them yourself, or find a particular favorite of hers.
A single flower of some description, would fall into the understated but nice category too.

G86

Fishie wrote: »

The next day, however, my boyfriend gave me a collage he'd made of his favourite photographs of the two of us. It was a complete surprise and he'd gone to the effort of framing it and everything

See THIS is what Valentines should be about , anyone can buy flowers or chocolates, but it's the little things like this that mean so much more. If I'm in a relationship I do little things like that all of the time, because there's nothing better than seeing a smile on the face of the person you love.

So no, it doesn't have to be Feb 14th to celebrate your relationship, but at the same time it's a nice way to remind people who may sometimes take it for granted to show that they care.

Why does everyone have to be so cynical about it, simply because it's a 'hallmark' holiday? Who cares? It's one day a year, that celebrates love, and regardless of whether you do that 365 days a year, or just that one day - it doesn't make it any less fun to do

Jebus, it turns out I'm a big oul romantic after all....:p

Deedsie

Moonbaby wrote: »

The posted card bit, sounds like a definite hint.
I'd run with it, of I were you.
Chocolate is a good something small. They might be more personal if you make them yourself, or find a particular favorite of hers.
A single flower of some description, would fall into the understated but nice category too.

Thanks for the reply MB, see I have only just started seeing her, but I have known her a long time. I think she would be embarrassed by the flower. She still lives at home, so she will get enough grief for the card in the mail. I think chocolates is the way to go. I would like to get her something more thoughtful but it's hard to when you have only been together a few weeks.

G86

Deedsie wrote: »

Thanks for the reply MB, see I have only just started seeing her, but I have known her a long time. I think she would be embarrassed by the flower. She still lives at home, so she will get enough grief for the card in the mail. I think chocolates is the way to go. I would like to get her something more thoughtful but it's hard to when you have only been together a few weeks.

You should sooo make her a card It's really thoughtful and it kind of takes away the need for another gift. Plus buying cards can be kind of awkward anyway when you're only together a short while, as they're all full of 'I love you's' etc.