That time of year again... The dreaded Love Day

Whispered

To be honest I never got the feeling men were expected to do more for V-day, I always thought it was a 50/50 thing.

Count Duckula

bluewolf wrote: »

Never heard this

Perhaps it's a British thing! There was an advert once that summed it up perfectly, I wish I could remember for what product because it was brilliant. It showed a woman browsing through an entire aisle of Valentine's Day cards, looking through dozens, trying to find the perfect one. Then it cut to the man and he was buying petrol, and as he pulled his wallet out of his back pocket he just reached over and pulled the nearest card out of the small display on the counter.

bluewolf wrote: »

Because for an anniversary, it's got specific memories and history for the couple. Sure, I don't care about the specific day in my own relationship, just "oh it was around this week sometime, that's nice"

Well the only memory an anniversary has is that first one. All subsequent anniversary memories are only memories because they were done on that day. Valentine's Day could hold lots of happy memories in the same way if people celebrated it and did something special each year.

Neyite

Best Valentine was the first one with himself.

He (who would burn water) cooked me a 3 course meal. That knocked my socks off because he didnt just buy something, he spent hours slaving outside his comfort zone to give me something nice.

Usually we stay in, snuggle up with after a nice home cooked dinner with a bottle of wine or two, nice treats, a good movie and an early night .

LenaClaire

My first real date with my husband was valentine's day; he waited too late and all the big shops were closed and so he bought me a kinder egg at a little corner shop. I thought it was cute and so now just about every year I get a kinder egg for valentine's day.

We don't really do much else as neither of us really are the type to make a big deal out of it, it is just a reminder of our first date and I think it is very sweet.

midlandsmissus

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

It's right next to my birthday so it's always been a non-event in lieu of birthday celebrations....I think valentines is a complete hallmark day anyway, so no I can't imagine I'd be a fan regardless.

Snap. My brithday is a few days after it, used to think it sucked as I'd always get teh one present for the two days.

Now i'm older and appreciate the real things and I quite like being born in the week of love! It's a nice week to be born in I think.

Maj Malfunction

Its right next to my own birthday, so myself and my wife tend to celebrate my birthday a week or two later.

Valentine's day is probably the worst day to eat in a restaurant, food is usually below par and the people are crammed in like sardines and if I brought flowers home, my wife would be wondering what I did wrong and what I was trying to apologise for!

Much better to get a nice bottle of wine and bring home a box of chocolates and have a nice home cooked meal.

phasers

I hate valentines day, I'm single so always get roped into babysitting other people's kids! I think I'll invent a boyfriend this year so they won't pester me.

Lia_lia

Why do people care so much about being single/having a partner? I don't understand why people get so upset on valentine's day if they are single I am single, and was single last year, and valentines day doesn't upset me in the least. Never really "celebrated" it either whenever I've been in relationships.

Anyway I'll probably be working. Most likely in the restaurant/residents bar of the hotel I work in. So I get to see annoying couples being lovey dovey.

Puke.

starlit

Nay. Don't like valentines day. Its a money making racket. I treat it like any other day. I find other special holidays and occasions worth more when celebrating those days. I've never had a bf or even gone out with someone on valentines day so cynical about that cause I've always been single for valentines day and never gone out for it. Its so clichéd to have to go out for valentines day and send valentines day messages/give gifts/cards. If I got a card at all it be a farce or a joke on me it be from a family member prentending I have an admirer when I don't. So wouldn't like to be sent a card unless I was seeing someone or had a bf. I can't stand it I prefer romance any time of the year than just to have to romance for one day. Its means very little if you romance someone for one day and not do so any other day of the year!?

Puke - yuck! Gross day if you ask me having to see people display pda's on the day its sickening so surely those loved up could go do it in private and in their own time without other people looking at them whether single or not!? Personally if I were going out with someone I wouldn't want much to do with valentines at all! A card be enough or just stay in or something not to show off blah blah...valentines day doesn't mean much to me!

squishykins

I don't celebrate Valentine's day per se, we give each other cards with really nice messages but that's it I use every day to show him how much he means to me

KiLLeR CoUCh

My grandad died a few years ago on Valentine's day, so for a couple of years afterwards I found it a really upsetting day. All the teddies and heart shaped crap in the shops seemed even more superfluous than usual. The year after his death my ex got into a serious mood because I didn't want to celebrate it in any way and I hadn't made him a card. I frequently went out of my way to do nice things for him as well, so it's not like he was deprived of affection either.

My OH now understood completely why I didn't even want the day mentioned last year so this year I've made him a card (I didn't know if I'd have time closer to the day so I have it made and stored away) and I'm going to make him cookies. Nothing big or flashy, just something so he knows I appreciate him. I certainly wont be going near a hotel or restaurant. Regardless of how I feel about the day I'd never let myself be ripped off that badly

Cgoodie

It's my birthday so there's always a card for me...even if it is from my mammy & daddy:D

It's a bit of a crap day for a birthday at times though because it's not a great night for going out or eating out.

Novella

I think V Day is ridiculous, but... I still kinda like it.

snooleen

I agree that it's a Hallmark day and a silly waste of money. Best Valentines Day was the first one with the OH when he got me a little bouquet of red flowers and we went to Dublin Zoo and made out beside the elephants (we were 15/16).

This year he asked if I wanted a big deal-I said no, were both just gonna have dinner at home together and he said I'm allowed watch one of my soppy films :P So basically an ordinary night in for us. We'll each write a little letter to eachother because we both find cards stupid. I think it's nice in the sense that we both know we'll be spending that day together.

magneticimpulse

Im not a big fan of Valentines and have never enjoyed it when Ive had a boyfriend. Its always been hyped up and hate going to restaurants that are overpriced.

Also one year ex went to the trouble of ordering roses...however I did want to stay at home alone over valentines (he was working in Ireland...im abroad) and had already made plans to visit some girly friends. He then had to tell me he had ordered roses to be delivered. Obviously i never got them on Valentines as I was away. (it was a saturday). So come Monday I went to florists after work but it was closed. Tuesday it closed even earlier. Finally got them on the Wednesday (5 days after valentines)...they were nearly dead and only lasted that night and died the next day. He had ordered champagne and chocolates...instead the florist gave me sparkling peach juice that had gone brown and was out of date...and coffee flavoured sweets. It was just awful and i felt really bad as ex had spent €100 on them and it just was not good service at all.

Another year a different guy, never booked a restaurant, so we spent the whole evening wandering around lots of towns in Holland looking for a free table. In the end, he managed to find one at 11pm in a restaurant near his house.

Then another year (another ex)...was driving and we went to the restaurant. So it was only me drinking the wine. Half way into the meal I was completely pissed and he got really angry over it!! He didnt get me roses or chocolates and because i was so pissed i made a comment over it. I normally would expect things, but it was the 1st boyfriend i ever had during Valentines and I think I was about 22!!! When you spend your life never getting a Valentines card because your single, you at least expect something after 22 years. We ended up having a fight. It was so horrible.


As a woman its one day of the year I like to hide away at home and just hope Valentines disappears quickly.

shrewd

Nervous Wreck wrote: »

....... I spend a grand on a weekend away and she spends 30 quid on knickers and bras. Whore.

Anyway! What say yee, ladies/man-ladies?

best part in bold :D

RacoonQueen

I'm not a very soppy/emotional person so when I'm in a relationship I hate it because it's stupid. When I'm not, I hate it because I'm bitter. :pac:

An ex used to send me flowers on the 10th and wish me a happy 10th of February. I miss that.

MissOphelia

I made a card for my now ex last year, covered it with hearts etc. I spent ages looking in antique/junk shops for an old fashioned ornate key which I tied on the card with red ribbon and a message along the lines of 'you have the key to my heart'. I made a little heart shaped cake too. He surprised me with an overnight in a 5 star hotel which was bliss.
When we split up he returned the card and he'd ripped it up in bits :mad:
Hate Valentines this year, too many memories..

epgc3fyqirnbsx

I look at Valentines as being kinda cheesey, like the 80's. But like the 80's you can have good fun with it if you just take the piss and have a laugh. And you'll probably have a much better night than if you were staring into each others eyes through the candle light in some soppy restaurant
:pac:

yogalady

Hi all
I am recently out of a five year relationship. Was devastated when it ended. Came out of the blue. Still picking up the pieces but doing ok. I would like to do something nice for MYSELF on valentines day and not having it being about memories of the past.

anyone any suggestions?
I just want to be kind and loving to myself on the day. God knows I need it as do many more women out there i'm sure. I be very grateful for any ideas

Thanks
x

Censorsh!t

MissOphelia wrote: »

I made a card for my now ex last year, covered it with hearts etc. I spent ages looking in antique/junk shops for an old fashioned ornate key which I tied on the card with red ribbon and a message along the lines of 'you have the key to my heart'. I made a little heart shaped cake too. He surprised me with an overnight in a 5 star hotel which was bliss.
When we split up he returned the card and he'd ripped it up in bits :mad:
Hate Valentines this year, too many memories..

That's horrible :( I can feel my heart breaking so god only knows how you felt

Morag

Blush_01

I like the idea of Valentines, just not the execution.

In college my friends and I used to make little handmade cards for eachother and swap them, just for fun, and it was nice, just a little gesture to remind you that someone was thinking of you (even if it was in a non-romantic way).

I'm pretty sure I said this last year (and the year before) but the thing about it is, we usually do take the people we love and care about for granted a bit, and it's nice to have something squishy to look forward to after the usual blues of January.

I'm not into the ridiculous expensive gift thing, but I'd really appreciate some squishyness. Especially from a certain someone. (Universe, can you hear me?? )

Maple

Threads merged, Maple.

pow wow

Single or in a relationship it's always a solo affair - I've never been on the same continent as an OH on Valentine's :rolleyes:. When I was younger and invariably crushing on some guy I'd make a big effort with it but lately there's no-one I'd even bother with Personally I'm not into presents but love a card!

No cards or pressies this year (might manage a text or three!) but I still love Valentine's.

Eve_Dublin

I´ve always celebrated in some way in a very low key way when I´ve been in a relationship. Just dinner at home and a homemade card and cake or something. Nothing bought. I suppose I´ve been so loved up in the past that any excuse to be with them was all good.

Jaysus, my worst Valentine´s memory was when I just moved home to Dublin temporarily from London after I got my heart royally smashed to pieces and I was walking back to my flat after work and was walking past the St. Stephen´s Green shopping centre and I´m not joking you, about 20 couples were walking down the street towards me hand-in-hand like something out of the Dawn of the Dead. It was truly awful, I never felt so lonely and ridiculous in all my life. That memory still haunts me. Delighted it´s not celebrated here in Spain although apparently it´s gaining popularity.

I don´t mind it when I´m in a relationship but I do feel somewhat bitter if I´m single. This year I´m going to round up the single friends and head out for a few. No biggie.

SheRa

I love Valentines.

I dont care about presents, dont ever go out for a meal as its usually horrible, rushed and a rip off, but I love love love getting a card from my OH. That is really special to me. I love the thought that he puts into every card that he has written to me:).

seenitall

MissOphelia wrote: »

When we split up he returned the card and he'd ripped it up in bits :mad:

Look, if it's any consolation, no-one does something like this unless they had deep feelings for the person in the first place (love turned to hate etc.)

Valentine's... It can be good fun when it happens to fall within the optimum time-frame of a relationship , and when I'm single I don't mind it one bit and actually even weirdly enjoy it somewhat (maybe cos I'm like the Pavlov's dogs, my brain immediately associates any red hearts imagery I see in shops with the taste of chocolate ).

candy-gal1

Ah screw it! "Ghost" being played all day in the cinema (going early with my mate to avoid seeing some of the couply antics lol), then head home for a horror movie marathon myself and then getting buckled out somewhere that night with another mate! Good times to be had methinks!

allandanyways

Ah here, it's not even a real holiday, I hate the way people go on like you "should" do something or sit around feeling sorry for themselves if they're single. The only thing different about Valentine's Day to any other day of the year is that it's a gazillion times easier to find a card that says "I love you" on it. You pay 3 times the amount for absolutely everything only to be surrounded by other couples? No thanks. I'd prefer to have to make the effort to find a card that says "I love you" in the middle of July or turn up on the 16th of November with a homemade cake and their favourite DVD.

I don't begrudge happy couples at all, but the emphasis that is placed on a day that is actually only commemorating the burial of an ancient Roman martyr really, really annoys me. I'm all for the little gestures all throughout the year, and maybe one or two big gestures when the person is least expecting it. Tbh, people say that Valentine's day is all about showing someone how much you love them? If you really love someone, why would you want to confine it to just one, overpriced and overhyped day a year? When I was with my ex, I tried to do something every day of the year to show them how much I loved them.

IMO, it's a load of crap and shows just how much people are affected by commercial brainwashing. The fella I'm seeing at the minute went to get a DVD the other night and left me up in his apartment to wait for the Chinese to be delivered. When he came back, he had two small bags of toffee popcorn because I'd told him about a month ago how it's annoying that it's really hard to get toffee popcorn in anything other than those big bags from Xtravision. That was the 23rd of January, the date meant nothing but the little gesture did.