Haven't touched a drop in...

First weekend and I went out both Friday night and tonight; both in familiar places with drinking buddies. No one passes comment that I'm on the n/a beers. I really do have a pub centred social life, but that doesn't mean it has to be drink centred. I decided to face these locations head on from the very beginning rather than avoid them and dread them. My next step may be one of my favourite craft beer pubs... now that's a challenge.

emmabrighton

Had my little boys christening on the weekend. We just invited our siblings and their children and the grandparents.

My mom can be a bit of an auld terror on the drink so it was an alcohol free zone. It is a year and a half off the drink for me and I did a program to help kick start my new life.

That meant there were no questions asked as to why there was no drink at the party - just fizzy drinks and tea and coffee. We had a great time. Everyone came back to my house for party games and cake. After 2 hours, I was shattered and when everyone did go home, I went straight to bed.

My hairdresser asked me if I had a baby sitter and would I be heading out after? My immediate response was "fcuk, no" - I was so tired from all the preparation for his christening that I knew that I would be heading to bed for a rest once the party was over.

But that got me thinking that there are people that treat christenings/childrens birthday parties as an excuse for a booze up. I think that is wrong anyway. Growing up with an alcoholic mother I feel that children and alcohol don't mix, period!

But, I think that if I was still drinking, even with the very best of intentions I would have gotten rat arsed drinking glass after glass of wine. Other people would have had to taken care of my son, and I would have been completely ashamed the next morning with a crippling hangover to boot.

I thank god today for my sober life.

ConFurioso

Emma, that's a great story and happy for you that it worked out. Proof that booze isn't needed at a party to have a good time.

DieselPowered

This thread will only make sense to people who are off the drink and want to be off the drink

5 months off it now don't miss it at all.I may not stay off it for ever but I can't see it going back to being boozing weekends down the road.

FloatingVoter

Still off it since Jan. 17th ( I'm not counting my pre-planned one night blip on May 7th). While the sun makes the beer gardens tempting, I just remind myself how lousy a hangover feels in hot weather. Even one or two pints of cider on a sunny day leaves me with a nasty headache once I stop.
I'm actually becoming addicted to those little fruit juice things that you get in Lidl (like Capri-suns only cheaper). Perhaps I'll need a thread for that next .

DieselPowered

Out of curiousity, is drinking non-alcoholic beer considered 'on the beer'.

There is a nice weissbier beer out there, very nice to taste and gives the satisfaction of a pint if you want to calm a thirst, while others are just not nice.

As mentioned, its hard to stay out of beer garden country with the heat wave

DieselPowered

DieselPowered wrote: »

Out of curiousity, is drinking non-alcoholic beer considered 'on the beer'.

There is a nice weissbier beer out there, very nice to taste and gives the satisfaction of a pint if you want to calm a thirst, while others are just not nice.

As mentioned, its hard to stay out of beer garden country with the heat wave

I wouldn't consider it "on the beer" myself but I don't drink it. I loved my beer when I was drinking and I don't want to create unneccessary temptation by drinking that stuff. I've actually come across a few people that went down this route and were back on the real stuff within a month or two.

Wattle

I had a non-alcoholic beer a few weeks ago. No big deal as long as your not craving the real stuff.

DieselPowered

Deleted User wrote: »

I wouldn't consider it "on the beer" myself. I don't want to create un neccessary temptation by drinking that stuff. I've actually come across a few people that went down this route and were back on the real stuff within a month or two.

Had 2 non-alcoholic's last night and I have no temptation to go back on to main beer. just wanted something to drink that wasn't minerals at a BBQ, so each to their own I suppose.

DieselPowered

DieselPowered wrote: »

Had 2 non-alcoholic's last night and I have no temptation to go back on to main beer. just wanted something to drink that wasn't minerals at a BBQ, so each to their own I suppose.

Ah yeah exactly whatever your preference but I genuinely know two people off the top of my head that blamed drinking the non alcoholic stuff as a contributor to going back on the proper stuff. For that reason I just avoid it but I'm sure it's not like that for all people at all.

ncmc

DieselPowered wrote: »

Out of curiousity, is drinking non-alcoholic beer considered 'on the beer'.

There is a nice weissbier beer out there, very nice to taste and gives the satisfaction of a pint if you want to calm a thirst, while others are just not nice.

As mentioned, its hard to stay out of beer garden country with the heat wave

I enjoy the non alcoholic beer I must say, I find it easier to drink than soft drinks or water and if you’re in a group of drinkers, it’s less obvious that you’re not drinking so you don’t have people making a big deal of it. Although, I am not drinking at the moment, I wouldn’t consider myself to have a serious issue with alcohol and don’t crave the real stuff, so as KaG says, I suppose it differs from person to person.

Becks is the worst of them and unfortunately it is the most common. I have had Erdinger and Krombacher non alcoholic lately and I really enjoyed them I must say. I felt less ‘left out’ in the beer garden with everyone else having beer!

DieselPowered

ncmc wrote: »

Becks is the worst of them and unfortunately it is the most common. I have had Erdinger and Krombacher non alcoholic lately and I really enjoyed them I must say.

Thank you - Thought it was just my taste, Becks is definitely the worst, I now will not drink it again, even if they have nothing else, its not nice.
Blue Erdinger is a refreshing drink and it nice at the same time.

Clover

8 days so far , still early days but I want it to last.

quinrea01

Okay let's get one thing straight. Non-alcoholic beer is one of the most dangerous things anyone can drink if they are sincere about packing up drink. I personally know of 3 or 4 people who fell into that subtle trap and blame the n/a beers for their downfall. Also, frequenting pubs is another big mistake. If you go into a barber shop often enough you will get a haircut....if you go into pubs often enough you WILL drink!!!

DieselPowered

quinrea01 wrote: »

Okay let's get one thing straight. Non-alcoholic beer is one of the most dangerous things anyone can drink if they are sincere about packing up drink. I personally know of 3 or 4 people who fell into that subtle trap and blame the n/a beers for their downfall. Also, frequenting pubs is another big mistake. If you go into a barber shop often enough you will get a haircut....if you go into pubs often enough you WILL drink!!!

Don't think so, sounds like you have it in for Non-alco beer, its being very dangerous and all that, never mind frequenting pubs.

Wattle

quinrea01 wrote: »

Okay let's get one thing straight. Non-alcoholic beer is one of the most dangerous things anyone can drink if they are sincere about packing up drink. I personally know of 3 or 4 people who fell into that subtle trap and blame the n/a beers for their downfall. Also, frequenting pubs is another big mistake. If you go into a barber shop often enough you will get a haircut....if you go into pubs often enough you WILL drink!!!

I agree with you to a certain extent. It's better to stay clear of pubs in the early days and establish a life outside of that environment. You also have to fully fall out of love with booze. No carving it, no nostalgia for the good days. I think establishing a life outside of the pub and appreciating it gives you a certain kind of power. I'm very very rarely in pubs these days because I have other things to do. I was with some friends a few weeks ago who wanted to go to the pub. Usually I have a sparkling water but I just fancied trying a N/A beer. It doesn't automatically mean that my next order is going to be a triple vodka. But like I say if it's early days it's best to avoid drinking situations.

Wattle

DieselPowered wrote: »

Don't think so, sounds like you have it in for Non-alco beer, its being very dangerous and all that, never mind frequenting pubs.
Maybe you need a drink.;)

Please don't come in here touting that line. We've each heard it too many times and it isn't going to help anybody that reads this forum.

quinrea01

DieselPowered wrote: »

Don't think so, sounds like you have it in for Non-alco beer, its being very dangerous and all that, never mind frequenting pubs.
Maybe you need a drink.;)

I really think you are frequenting the wrong site. All a big joke to you is it? Do you not understand that people on this site are trying to turn their lives around? And yes, I do have it in for n/a beers because they instill a false sense of security into people who are trying their best to re-join the human race and try to regain some semblance of sanity and freedom in their lives, so why don't you take a hike and bring your little smiley face with you.

DieselPowered

quinrea01 wrote: »

I really think you are frequenting the wrong site. All a big joke to you is it? Do you not understand that people on this site are trying to turn their lives around? And yes, I do have it in for n/a beers because they instill a false sense of security into people who are trying their best to re-join the human race and try to regain some semblance of sanity and freedom in their lives, so why don't you take a hike and bring your little smiley face with you.

I'm in this thread too, so calm down a little and give some credit to folks who can enjoy a non-alco in a pub environment without the need to turn back to beer. no need for the heavy hand.

quinrea01

DieselPowered wrote: »

I'm in this thread too, so calm down a little and give some credit to folks who can enjoy a non-alco in a pub environment without the need to turn back to beer. no need for the heavy hand.

Heavy hand not intended, simply pointing out inherent dangers in trying to preserve old lifestyles while at the same time combatting life-destroying practices. I take on board that you are doing your best in your own way and I wish you every success. Maybe I come across as some type of fundamentalist do-gooder without a sense of humor, but I'm only making my comments based on my own experiences and maybe what didn't work for me might work for you and others. I'm not an expert and I don't suppose anyone is, I'm simply throwing in my own tuppence worth. Good luck to all.

Ed The Equalizer

quinrea01 wrote: »

Okay let's get one thing straight. Non-alcoholic beer is one of the most dangerous things anyone can drink if they are sincere about packing up drink. I personally know of 3 or 4 people who fell into that subtle trap and blame the n/a beers for their downfall. Also, frequenting pubs is another big mistake. If you go into a barber shop often enough you will get a haircut....if you go into pubs often enough you WILL drink!!!

Ok, let's get another thing straight, the non-alcoholic beer did not make those 3 or 4 people pick up a drink. They're using it as an excuse.

I was scared ****less of NA beer because of what some people told me. Then I met a hardcore alco off it 22 years who enjoys them and I had one with him. Have been enjoying it ever since and has been a very satisfying part of my 4+ years sobriety.

Lots of 'rooms' stuff creeping into this thread recently, it was going great before that...

ConFurioso

quinrea01 wrote: »

Okay let's get one thing straight. Non-alcoholic beer is one of the most dangerous things anyone can drink if they are sincere about packing up drink. I personally know of 3 or 4 people who fell into that subtle trap and blame the n/a beers for their downfall. Also, frequenting pubs is another big mistake. If you go into a barber shop often enough you will get a haircut....if you go into pubs often enough you WILL drink!!!

This is a flawed logic. A barber only serves a haircut. A pub does not only serve alcohol.

FloatingVoter

Taok wrote: »

Lots of 'rooms' stuff creeping into this thread recently, it was going great before that...

Agreed on the NA drink being used as a handy excuse for falling off the wagon.

On the last point, this is a broad church - we've people in here who are choosing not to drink as a lifestyle choice (like vegetarians not eating meat), people quitting drink because they made an idiot of themselves at too many parties, and chronic alcoholics who've wrecked their lives and those of others due to drink. We're bound to disagree every now and again. One fundamental point of agreement is nobody here sees drink as a solution to anything.

Well said, whenever I post on this thread I do always say it's from my own experience and could differ greatly to others. I don't think non alcoholic beers would be bad for everyone at all, they just aren't for me.

Ed The Equalizer

FloatingVoter wrote: »

On the last point, this is a broad church - we've people in here who are choosing not to drink as a lifestyle choice (like vegetarians not eating meat), people quitting drink because they made an idiot of themselves at too many parties, and chronic alcoholics who've wrecked their lives and those of others due to drink. We're bound to disagree every now and again. One fundamental point of agreement is nobody here sees drink as a solution to anything.

Yes agreed, I bring it up though because I'm pretty sure I've read a few times earlier in this thread that no AA or treatment stuff is to be discussed here (forum rules)...

ncmc

Six weeks today, finally made the decision that I needed a period of time off alcohol after yet another occasion where I made a total idiot of myself due to too much alcohol which in turn caused a massive row with my husband. As the previous poster talked about a broad church of people, I fall in the category of not being a heavy drinker day to day. In fact I can go weeks without a drink, but 3-4 times a year, I go out intending to have a few drinks or plan to come home after an hour and instead do the total dog and stay out 10-12 hours. I also suffer a bit from blackouts when I drink heavily, I don’t pass out or anything, but there could be an hour or more when I have little or no memory of what has happened or what I said. This causes a really chronic dose of ‘the fear’ the next day when I imagine the worst case scenario of what I have said. This fear can actually last for days and even weeks later I can wince with shame when I think about nights out.

So with all the above in mind I decided to set a goal of 12 weeks alcohol free (will see how I feel after the 12 weeks are up) I am hoping by going out for nights out and not drinking I will learn that I don’t need a bucketful of alcohol to enjoy myself. I am hoping that this period of abstention will teach me that moderation is ok and I can have a good night without getting totally pie eyed.

So far, I have found things ok, I have met some incredulity and resistance from some people (people I would have drank with) Some have argued with me that it’s better to learn moderation rather than total abstinence, but my argument would be that I have tried that in the past and failed, once the few drinks got on board, all good intentions go out the window. To be honest, I would be of the opinion that some of the people questioning my methods are people who have slight issues with alcohol themselves and maybe they don’t like the fact that I am looking at my drinking as it puts a mirror up to their own drinking. I have had a couple of nights out where I would normally get quite drunk and have actually had quite a good night without alcohol (and nice to be able to drive home) I do find I get bored at about 1pm though as people get progressively drunk.

I have one slight issue though. I have a hen night coming up this weekend. I will know a couple of the people going very well and a couple only slightly, the rest will be practically strangers. I am getting really anxious about how to deal with not drinking as I don’t really fancy having to talk about my reasons to people who I barely know. We are getting a bus quite early in the morning and I know the drinking will start early. There will probably be a kitty as well. I am just finding I am really getting worried about the whole thing, that would normally be a prime reason for me to drink – the nerves of being with new people would be dulled by a few drinks. I was thinking of not getting the bus and driving myself later in the afternoon, but I don’t know how to deal with the kitty situation or the inevitable ‘are you pregnant or something’ if I say I’m not drinking.

quinrea01

ConFurioso wrote: »

This is a flawed logic. A barber only serves a haircut. A pub does not only serve alcohol.

Pedantic response, especially when you consider you can get a shave in a barbers, too. But more to the point, I standby my earlier warnings re: n/a beers. If you feel you can handle it go right ahead and you might be lucky enough to be able to enjoy the pub atmosphere without it fooking your head up, like some posters on here insist is possible. It all depends really on how bad you are/were with too much gargle on board. It also depends, to a large extent if you are determined to stay sober for ever, a day at a time, or if you just want to give your liver a little holiday. Only you know your own limitations....and only you know what you want for yourself. Ciao for now.

hedgehog2

Was off it 11mths until last month.
Had some time off foreign,first night in the bar ordered a water finished late in a club drinking spirits.
Just like that,had no desire to break until I put myself in the hol/pub atmosphere.
Drank a dozen times with a few occasions having to be told to come home.
I made it a point of not entering a pub after that,off it about a week now and I have no desire to drink once I have my routine and creature comforts.
I have to agree with others about non alco beers,for me only reminds me of drink and I get that feeling to get s#@t faced.
Same for the pub scene until I break 2yrs off the drink I know I cant set foot in one and will refuse all functions/weddings in the meantime.
I have been trying to kick the drink for yrs,this time I am taking no chances and putting stop barriers along the way to steer off the drink.

ConFurioso

quinrea01 wrote: »

Pedantic response, especially when you consider you can get a shave in a barbers, too. But more to the point, I standby my earlier warnings re: n/a beers. If you feel you can handle it go right ahead and you might be lucky enough to be able to enjoy the pub atmosphere without it fooking your head up, like some posters on here insist is possible. It all depends really on how bad you are/were with too much gargle on board. It also depends, to a large extent if you are determined to stay sober for ever, a day at a time, or if you just want to give your liver a little holiday. Only you know your own limitations....and only you know what you want for yourself. Ciao for now.

I had a massive reply written, going into far too much depth.

But **** it. I'm going to apologise for my comment, it was flippant. I'm sorry.

We're all in this together, but some of us are taking different measures to get to the same goal. All we can really do is give each other help and support along the way.

quinrea01

ConFurioso wrote: »

I had a massive reply written, going into far too much depth.

But **** it. I'm going to apologise for my comment, it was flippant. I'm sorry.

We're all in this together, but some of us are taking different measures to get to the same goal. All we can really do is give each other help and support along the way.

No problem ConFurioso, we are all fighting the good fight to our best abilities. In our own separate ways we are helping our friends on here to consider alternative approaches and find their own levels of recovery. The important thing is that we raise these issues and point out the dangers and pitfalls. I have ten years of unbroken sobriety behind me now, and believe me, at times it wasn't easy and I came close to disaster on more than one occasion. The reason I seem to come across so anti-n/a beers is due to strong advice I got from friends who fell into the trap and lived to regret it (actually, some didn't). It was only through listening to these people that I avoided that trap. All that people are really doing is perpetuating the drink mindset and although most would deny it, even to themselves, there will come a time when they resent the lack of 'kick' in the stuff and break out again. I wish you well and I wish me well too, as I do for all of us who seek a better life, free from slavery.