Dental plan!

jiltloop

Lisa: I'm going to become a vegetarian.
Homer: Does that mean you're not going to eat any pork?
Lisa: Yes.
Homer: Bacon?
Lisa: Yes dad!
Homer:Ham?
Lisa: Dad all those meats come from the same animal.
Homer: Right Lisa, some wonderful magical animal!

jiltloop

Actually here's my favourite:

"Marge I'm pulling an all nighter for my little girl, put on a pot of coffee, drink it and start making burgers."

here.from.day.1

A 21 page tread from "Lisa needs braces." Is there anything the Simpsons hasn't done!

allanb49

take everything wrote: »

HOT STUFF, COMING THROUGH!!!

You've got a spark,

ooo get it out get it out.

bonerm

here.from.day.1 wrote: »

A 21 page tread from "Lisa needs braces." Is there anything the Simpsons hasn't done!

Cancel the show while they're still behind.

ilovelamp2000

you'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel.

Dolbert

Now I may not have any 'credentials', or 'training', but I do have a PHD... in pain.

Busi_Girl08

Homer - "Oh God! Give me a sign!!"

*phone rings*

Homer - "...Yelloooooo?"
"Hello Homer, this is God........frey Jones"

Gunsfortoys

Dramatisation may not of happened!

Pookah

A random thread or is it some sort of Simpson's anniversary?

hal9000

Homer: Scooby Doo can doo doo but Jimmy Carter is smarter!

Homer: Lets just say he is barking up the wrong bush
Homer's Brain: There it is Homer. The smartest thing you'll ever say, and nobody heard it.
Homer: D'OH!

This is hour 57 of our live, 'round the clock coverage outside the Simpson estate. Remember, by the way, to tune in at 8:00 for highlights of today's vigil, including when the garbage man came and when Marge Simpson put the cat out. Possibly because it was harassed, we don't know.

krudler

here.from.day.1 wrote: »

A 21 page tread from "Lisa needs braces." Is there anything the Simpsons hasn't done!

It was 12 when I last looked, ha what have I done :pac:

I just figured AH needed a thread that wasnt about Ireland bashing, banks, the government or anything else that makes people argue.

Plus I'm in tears laughing at some of the quotes on here, it really was the pinnacle of tv during its glory years.

Sam Vimes

When I was seventeen, I drank some very good beer
I drank some very good beer I purchased with a fake ID
My name was Brian McGee
I stayed up listening to Queen
When I was seventeen

MR.VICE PRESIDENT

Links234 wrote: »

feels like I'm wearing nothing at all!

Nothing at all! ... Nothing at all !

SeaFields

Haw Haw!!

/nelson

abouttobebanned

What am I...made of airports?!

My name is URL

Sure.. now he's a little boy stealing little toys. But one day he'll be a grown man, stealing stadiums.. and quarries

krudler

dont ever come back here again, capishe?
....
Well? do you understand?
everything but capishe...

ilovelamp2000

Fat Tony: Ah Johnny Tightlips, how was your flight?
Johnny Tightlips: I ain't saying nothing.
Fat Tony: I understand, how's your mother?
Johnny Tightlips: Whoa whoa whoa, who said I had a mother?

Shelga

You pressed you, referring to me. The correct answer is YOU! :pac:

IvyTheTerrible

Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals... except the weasel.

davrho

Dont you hate pants

RolandIRL

Me fail english? that unpossible

IvyTheTerrible

The fingers you have used to dial are too fat, to obtain a special dialing wand please mash the keypad with your palm now.

the purple tin

-Outta my way, I got a date with an angel.
-You don't know how right you are.

Susie_Q

Hi, I'm Troy McClure. You might remember me from such self-help videos as "Smoke Yourself Thin" and "Get Confident, Stupid!"

Susie_Q

You don't win friends with salad! You don't win friends with salad!

Gunsfortoys

Isn't this great milhouse? The sun is shining, the birds are singing....bees are trying to have sex with them....as is my understanding.

klose

Mono rail.

Mono meaning one, and rail, meaining rail!

SeaFields

Its a program from that guys funeral, Frank Grimes. Hey Marge, whatever happened to that guy.

bonerm

Where's the any key?

the purple tin

Work hard Zutroy and every day you'll receive a shiny new penny.

You there, fill her up with petroleum distillate and revulcanize my tyres post haste.

krudler

Dad you shouldnt wear glasses that arent prescribed for you.
Lisa, just because you're 10 feet tall doesnt mean you can tell me what to do.
I'm Bart.

Wossack

Some of my favs, which suprisingly havent been posted yet (skimmed whole thread, love it!)

<Homer passed out drooling on deck of boat>
Lisa: Oh, no! Dad's been drugged!
Marge: [annoyed] No, he hasn't.

Wiggum: Get up Simpson. You're going to the chair.
Homer: *gasps*
Wiggum: The interrogation chair.
Homer: *phew*
Wiggum: Plug it in boys!
Homer: *gasps*

Homer: You can't send me to prison! They pee in a cup and throw it on you! I saw it in a movie!
FBI Agent: You won't be seeing any prison movies where you're going.. -prison!

Marge (as cop): You have the right to remain silent.
Homer: I choose to waive that right. RARRRARGHGGHHH

Homer: Well, he's got all the money in the world, but there's one thing he can't buy.
Marge: What's that?
Homer: [thinks] A dinosaur

Wiggum: Mr. Simpson, you're under arrest for the murder of Moe Szyslak and Apu Nahasa... pasa... has... ah just Moe, just Moe.

Truley

"Have you got any grease?"

"Yes, yes we do."

"Then grease me up, woman!"


"It's spanking season and I got a hankerin' for some spankerin'."

krudler

The PTA has disbanded, arrghhhh!
*jumps out window*
No no, the PTA has not disbanded
*jumps back in window*



Bart, you cant trust your perception at this altitude..

Yes, the glue will stop me!
That glue leaking?
Naw that glue aint going nowhere..


there goes the glue after all!

krudler

BONJOURRRRRRRRR! ya cheese eatin' surrender monkeys!

Sam Vimes

A turkey is a bad person. And to shake one's booty means to wiggle one's butt

krudler

Mom! Dad! Barts dead!
*gasp*
thats right! dead serious about going to Itchy and Scratchy Land!

Wossack

Is it weird that I only have to half read these to know immediately the scene, the characters, and which voice to do in my head?


Deploy the de-loch-inator!

xzanti

My dad's a pretty big wheel down at the cracker factory..

krudler

xzanti wrote: »

My dad's a pretty big wheel down at the cracker factory..

Son do you want to see how crackers are salted?
Do I!


I like...Langden Auger
.....I have no idea who that is

Busi_Girl08

Skinner says the teachers are going to crack any minute. Purple monkey dishwasher.

Well! We'll show him! Especially for that "purple monkey dishwasher" comment.

Aldebaran

It's a ring-toss game.

SeaFields

Amazingly this hasn't featured yet....

D'OH!

And it has even been added to the Oxford dictionary!

8-10

Works On Contingency? No! Money Down!

Creature

I'd like to send this letter to the Prussian consulate in Siam by aeromail. Am I too late for the 4:30 autogyro?

take everything

My name is URL wrote: »

Sure.. now he's a little boy stealing little toys. But one day he'll be a grown man, stealing stadiums.. and quarries

Brilliant.
Lawrence Tierney nailed that role.

krudler

take everything wrote: »

Brilliant.
Lawrence Tierney nailed that role.

thats right, Don Brodtka!
uh huh.