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Online Dating

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    #362
    parker kent
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,289 ✭✭✭parker kent


    mood wrote: »
    I know there are more than just guys who ignore what a girl has on her profile but like I said it is the main reason I ignore e-mails.

    I am not ignoring the experiences of a lot of people on dating sites I am simply trying to give advice based what I have experienced.

    And I never said it is just men who send poor, inappropriate or ill-judged emails getting ignored. Obviously someone could be ignored for a variety of reasons.

    Note: I am speaking for myself and from my own experience. I don't claim to speak for the entire female population.

    I was just clearing it up for the guy who asked. Giving him a little dose of reality. You'll get to talk to lots of great people, but be prepared to be ignored. And be prepared to ignore at times as well.


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    #363
    kingtut
    Registered Users Posts: 6,487 ✭✭✭kingtut


    mood wrote: »
    The main reason I wouldn't reply to a guy is that he doesn't fit what I want in a boyfriend. If you read a profile and not just look at a girls picture you can easily see if there is a point contacting her or not. Make sure you fit what they want before you contact them ie age, location, smoker/non-smoker, want kids/don't want kids.

    If I send someone a message on a dating website I think it is only polite to reply and say sorry but I am not interested. I think it is rude not to reply.

    Obviously there are exceptions to this if the message is something explicit...!


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    #364
    mood
    Registered Users Posts: 4,264 ✭✭✭mood


    kingtut wrote: »
    If I send someone a message on a dating website I think it is only polite to reply and say sorry but I am not interested. I think it is rude not to reply.

    Obviously there are exceptions to this if the message is something explicit...!

    I tried that at first. Some guys appreciate it and are fine with it but other start begging you to give them a chance, be friends, keep asking why and try to get you to change you mind. A small amount even send a nasty reply back. Also it takes a lot of time to reply to everyone who contacts you. Not everyone has that kind of time on there hands.

    Not getting replies is part and parcel of internet dating for men and women.


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    #365
    kingtut
    Registered Users Posts: 6,487 ✭✭✭kingtut


    mood wrote: »
    Not getting replies is part and parcel of internet dating for men and women.

    As is dealing with sickos and people who only want one thing, as well as those annoying people who start with "hi" or "how are you"...

    Each to their own I suppose I am pretty much giving up on online dating now anyway. Complete waste of time! :mad:


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    #366
    juma
    Closed Accounts Posts: 259 ✭✭juma


    danh789 wrote: »
    I've just started using a dating site but not having much luck so far. I've mailed a few girls but no responses. What is the best thing to write in the first message to get a girls attention and hopefully a reply?

    OK, here's what you do. Go onto Facebook. Find a good looking girl (try not to use an Irish girl) "Borrow" a picture of her's that she is looking well in. Create a fake profile on pof or whatever site your on. Use this photo. The mails will start flooding in from guys and you are bound to get some good material from a few of them. Worked for me!


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    #367
    mood
    Registered Users Posts: 4,264 ✭✭✭mood


    juma wrote: »
    OK, here's what you do. Go onto Facebook. Find a good looking girl (try not to use an Irish girl) "Borrow" a picture of her's that she is looking well in. Create a fake profile on pof or whatever site your on. Use this photo. The mails will start flooding in from guys and you are bound to get some good material from a few of them. Worked for me!

    That's a terrible idea. What gives you the right to use a girls photo? How would you like if someone created a fake profile using your photo? You could break up a relationship doing that or create problems with their job etc.


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    #368
    parker kent
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,289 ✭✭✭parker kent


    mood wrote: »
    That's a terrible idea. What gives you the right to use a girls photo? How would you like if someone created a fake profile using your photo? You could break up a relationship doing that or create problems with their job etc.

    Plus face legal action for using their photo without consent. It's a terrible and potentially costly idea for you and the person who's photo you are using.


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    #369
    danh789
    Closed Accounts Posts: 414 ✭✭danh789


    mood wrote: »
    That's a terrible idea. What gives you the right to use a girls photo? How would you like if someone created a fake profile using your photo? You could break up a relationship doing that or create problems with their job etc.

    You have to give him credit though because it actually works! Cheers for the tip.


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    #370
    Larianne
    Registered Users Posts: 35,954 ✭✭✭✭Larianne


    danh789 wrote: »
    You have to give him credit though because it actually works! Cheers for the tip.

    Em, but you're starting off the relationship on a complete and utter lie.

    What's the point then?


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    #371
    Otis Driftwood
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,925 ✭✭✭Otis Driftwood


    It's not only creepy that people would consider this kind of thing but very sad too.If you cant even manage to come up with something interesting to say without resorting to that kind of crap then online dating is clearly not for you.


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    #372
    danh789
    Closed Accounts Posts: 414 ✭✭danh789


    Larianne wrote: »
    Em, but you're starting off the relationship on a complete and utter lie.

    What's the point then?

    How is it any different to coming onto Boards and asking users here to give me lines to use for sending first time mails?


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    #373
    Otis Driftwood
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,925 ✭✭✭Otis Driftwood


    danh789 wrote: »
    How is it any different to coming onto Boards and asking users here to give me lines to use for sending first time mails?

    Its one thing to ask for advice,its another thing entirely to consider stealing someones picture and creating a fake profile just to get an idea of what to say.


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    #374
    mood
    Registered Users Posts: 4,264 ✭✭✭mood


    Otis Driftwood wrote: »
    It's not only creepy that people would consider this kind of thing but very sad too.If you cant even manage to come up with something interesting to say without resorting to that kind of crap then online dating is clearly not for you.

    Agree. It's nearly enough to put me off internet dating!


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    #375
    Larianne
    Registered Users Posts: 35,954 ✭✭✭✭Larianne


    danh789 wrote: »
    How is it any different to coming onto Boards and asking users here to give me lines to use for sending first time mails?

    My mistake, I see what you're doing now.

    Still, as others have said, it's very wrong to use another person's pic like that.

    I think its rather creepy and a little bit sad.


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    #376
    pablomakaveli
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,752 ✭✭✭pablomakaveli


    I don't really see the point in being deceitful. You'll get caught out in the end and if you did find someone you like they might be angry and then thats a potential relationship thrown away.


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    #377
    parker kent
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,289 ✭✭✭parker kent


    pablomakaveli wrote: »
    I don't really see the point in being deceitful. You'll get caught out in the end and if you did find someone you like they might be angry and then thats a potential relationship thrown away.

    I think the people being deceived by the above scheme are the men sending emails to a guy they think is actually a girl.


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    #378
    mood
    Registered Users Posts: 4,264 ✭✭✭mood


    The worse thing (and most likely illegal) is using some ones photo with out consent.


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    #379
    Maj Malfunction
    Registered Users Posts: 194 ✭✭Maj Malfunction


    Why would someone feel the need to create a fake profile on the internet to harvest 'material' in order to chat-up the opposite sex?

    Like really! Have some people put their social skills in the bin and only communicate via a PC? If your life is that boring you should get out more often and meet real people.

    What are you going to do if you manage to arrange a date with a real person and they discover you have no social skills? Your not going to be able to Google your way out of that one!


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    #380
    parker kent
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,289 ✭✭✭parker kent


    Maj Malfunction wrote: »
    Why would someone feel the need to create a fake profile on the internet to harvest 'material' in order to chat-up the opposite sex?

    Like really! Have some people put their social skills in the bin and only communicate via a PC? If your life is that boring you should get out more often and meet real people.

    What are you going to do if you manage to arrange a date with a real person and they discover you have no social skills? Your not going to be able to Google your way out of that one!

    Whilst I'm in no way advocating the creepy, illegal and just outright wrong use of a fake profile, there are fair questions you can ask about what to send in a dating site message.


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    #381
    stupidusername
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    so how many of you have considered deleting your profile?


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    #382
    Galvasean
    Registered Users Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    stupidusername wrote: »
    so how many of you have considered deleting your profile?

    I'm thinking of deleting my connectingsingles and okcupid accounts tonight.
    Haven't received a mail in ages (apart from a 67 year old guy asking me to tell him about my sexual history). I'd say my mail/receive a reply ratio is about 1 in 50. Nobody from Ireland ever views my profile. I've only been involved in one mailing conversation and ironically that was from the first ever mail I sent on okcupid - about 5 or 6 replies before I got blanked (about 5 or 6 more than usual). Never got anything close to a date from online dating ever.
    Plus from what I've read on this thread you need a lot of hard work and a truck load of luck to get your mails so much as noticed by a girl on one of these sites.
    I think online dating must be the one thing on Earth more soul destroying than the 'IRL dating scene'.
    In the same time-frame (since joining both sites), I've been on many dates with some very nice girls simply by asking them out 'the old fashioned way'.

    In summary: Online dating was an interesting experiment for Galvasean, albeit ultimately one that failed.


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    #383
    Newsite
    Closed Accounts Posts: 820 ✭✭✭Newsite


    Galvasean wrote: »
    In the same time-frame (since joining both sites), I've been on many dates with some very nice girls simply by asking them out 'the old fashioned way'.

    In summary: Online dating was an interesting experiment for Galvasean, albeit ultimately one that failed.

    Mind if I ask what that time frame was? Seems like if you can get a decent number of dates the old fashioned way then prob not much need for dating sites :)

    Haven't been on a date in ages myself :( Time to get out and meet some new people methinks...


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    #384
    Galvasean
    Registered Users Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    Newsite wrote: »
    Mind if I ask what that time frame was?

    Think I joined cs about a year ago. OK about 5 months ago.


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    #385
    Galvasean
    Registered Users Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    Galvasean wrote: »
    I'm thinking of deleting my connectingsingles and okcupid accounts tonight.

    Done. Well, hidden/disabled anyway.


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    #386
    stupidusername
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    I've had three dates, but that was all my own doing. and two of the three were disastrous. not that i didn't get initial emails from guys, i did. though about half were very 'meh'.

    the thing I find difficult about it is getting a feel for the kind of person they are. I mean, i feel you can only really know by meeting someone, and by the time that happens you've spent quite a while talking to them, and if things end there, well it feels like a bit of a let down. i mean my last one, i spent more than a month chatting to him, and met up, and while I thought we got on well enough, I wasn't interested physically, but he apparently didn't like me. not that i'm not willing to put the effort in, but it seems a little bit of a backwards way to go about it. so I'm thinking i'll delete mine, and accept spinsterhood :pac:

    oh by the way galva, I think I had a look at yours...


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    #387
    Galvasean
    Registered Users Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    stupidusername wrote: »
    oh by the way galva, I think I had a look at yours...

    Handsome fellow? 14 feet tall? Nice sharp teeth? Short arms? Big head? Long tail?


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    #388
    stupidusername
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    Galvasean wrote: »
    Handsome fellow? 14 feet tall? Nice sharp teeth? Short arms? Big head? Long tail?

    yes, greenish kinda tone to the skin....


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    #389
    cantdecide
    Registered Users Posts: 11,465 ✭✭✭✭cantdecide


    Galvasean wrote: »
    Handsome fellow? 14 feet tall? Nice sharp teeth? Short arms? Big head? Long tail?

    LOL. I think I kissed your sister once.

    I joined OKC. There appears to be six girls in my area. Deleting this will be the easy peasy. Big waste of time for me. I too will be accepting bachelorhood.


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    #390
    stupidusername
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    cantdecide wrote: »
    LOL. I think I kissed your sister once.

    I joined OKC. There appears to be six girls in my area. Deleting this will be the easy peasy. Big waste of time for me. I too will be accepting bachelorhood.

    I know the feeling! i definitely come across the same people all the time. odd really.


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    #391
    tallaghtmick
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,724 ✭✭✭tallaghtmick


    cantdecide wrote: »
    I too will be accepting bachelorhood.
    stupidusername wrote: »
    so I'm thinking i'll delete mine, and accept spinsterhood :pac:QUOTE]

    AH gangbang:pac: lets see who else will join in lol


This discussion has been closed.
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