Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

I would put this in personal issues, but it's kind of funny so.....

  • 19-08-2008 10:44pm
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 469 ✭✭


    Fake names btw.....

    I was at a session there about two months ago. Myself and friends hit the town, flootered, great craic, etc.

    Went back to my mate Jimmys house, it was just three of us (males) drinkin away and the clock struck 6am and I said "f*kit jimmy I'm wrecked I'm kippin in your bed head to toe if you don't mind."

    Jimmy said "yeh no worries" and conked on the couch on the spot in a sitting upright position.

    Then my other friend Paddy said, "yeah I'm wrecked I'll hop in the bed too, Jimmy can stay on the couch, look at him he's bolixed, not gettin up".

    I looked over at Jimmy. He was slowly slipping into sleepyland with each breath.

    We left him in the sitting room.

    So asleep we went. Head to toe. Nothin' wrong with sleepin in the same bed as mates, I've done it loads of times before. And I was in my own sleeping bag as well so I was extra protected from what was about to happen......

    Ready?

    So myself and paddy were in jimmys bed. I drifted off.... I started to dream.....

    zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz......

    And I was awoken, gently, by a rhytmic squidgey sound with somebody breathing heavily "oooh ohhh yeah ohhh ohhhh yea ohhh my god ohhhh ohhh".

    I opened my eyes, staring at the wall with the sound coming from behind me. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. What the fuck was it? There was no way my two good mates were going at it, in the same bed as me, RIGHT BEHIND ME!!!!

    I was 100% awake now, still staring at the wall in front of my face "oooh ohhh yeah ohhh ohhhh yea ohhh my god ohhhh ohhh" and I plucked up the courage to turn around and find out exactly what was goin on.

    My mates can't be doing that can they. No way. They're the boys. The lads.

    I turned around.

    Jimmy had Paddys boner gripped tightly and was **** the shyte out if it.

    Paddy was the one screaming "oooh ooh ahh mmmm".

    They didn't notice me turning around.

    I turned right back around to the wall as quickly as possible as my mind raced 100mph.

    "How the fuck do I get out of the room?" I thought.

    Do I just tell them to stop?

    No that's embarrassing.

    This is embarrassing for me! What am I thinking! Of course they have to stop!

    But I should just pretend I didn't notice until the morning. Yeah. That's it.

    As horrible as it is I'll just wait till it's over and then go back to sleep....

    And I wont mention a fucking thing at breakfast...

    I continued staring at the wall as the **** started to die down.

    Phew.

    Sleep. At last.

    ****Tinkle****

    "What the fuck was that????!!!!"

    Suddenly, I heard a BELT BEING UNBUCKLED.

    Ooooohhhh SHYTE!!!

    SHYTE SHYTE SHYTE SHYTE SHYTE!!!!

    The bed started to rock back and forth.

    Paddy was being pushed up against me.

    "I can't stay here any longer" I thought to myself, "I'm going to get jizz and shit sprayed all over my face and all over my lovely new sleeping bag."

    So I said fcuk it. I got up. Without looking of course. And just walked out the door. They didn't stop.

    I should have walked out in the first place but I really was in a state of shock. I've never even seen gay porn on a magazine or film, and to see gay porn for the first time ever in the form of my two good mates shagging right beside me....... phuck.

    It's been two months now, and I've talked to paddy, barely. He says they only kissed. He says Jimmy started it.

    I haven't talked to Jimmy since that night. It's been a good solid two months. We were good college mates. Lived together. Did the same classes as eachother. Now nothing. He knows I know. And I know he knows I know.

    What the fcuk will I do? Will I call him and pretend nothing happened? Or should I ask him what the fcuk was he thinkin. Maybe we can have a chat about it.....

    Now can ye see why it's not fit for personal issues? I wouldn't be able to tell the story seriously enough for personal issues anyways.

    So what ya think?

    Would you say anything to your mate?


«13456

Comments

  • Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,698 Mod ✭✭✭✭Silverfish


    Pics or gtfo.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 19,080 ✭✭✭✭Random


    I think you should publish this. This is priceless material.

    Do your mates use boards? Just send them an anonymous link to this thread and it'll all be grand in the morning !


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 260 ✭✭adsgirl


    Poor guys are probably mortified , you should talk to them seperately at least, if you are to stay mates.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,008 ✭✭✭Bijoux


    Jesus, thats a terrible position to be stuck in (no pun intended)....

    If you and him were such good mates, surely it's worth giving him a ring? Ask how he's been... whatever you feel like.....and if that night comes up, just (a) play it casual like it wasnt a big deal or (b) ask about it, if you want.

    I'd say play it casual, try and keep in contact with him, and sure the situation seems to be awkward enough as it is, surely a few minutes of potential awkwardness on the phone would be worth it if it saves your friendship?


  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 47,537 CMod ✭✭✭✭Black Swan


    This thread has been rated 17. No admission for those below this age without a parent or guardian.


  • Advertisement
  • Users Awaiting Email Confirmation Posts: 827 ✭✭✭Phlann


    el oh fúcking el


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 19,080 ✭✭✭✭Random


    Bijoux wrote: »
    Jesus, thats a terrible position to be stuck in (no pun intended)....

    If you and him were such good mates, surely it's worth giving him a ring? Ask how he's been... whatever you feel like.....and if that night comes up, just (a) play it casual like it wasnt a big deal or (b) ask about it, if you want.

    I'd say play it casual, try and keep in contact with him, and sure the situation seems to be awkward enough as it is, surely a few minutes of potential awkwardness on the phone would be worth it if it saves your friendship?
    LOL .. "play it casual like it wasnt a big deal" ... :D

    Sorry .. it's late, I'm tired ..


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,676 ✭✭✭genericgoon


    You were in the same bed as them . You are now ghey by association.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,727 ✭✭✭✭Sherifu


    Fair play to 'Jimmy' & 'Paddy'. Did balls touch? You may have th3 gay now, i'd get that checked...


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,130 ✭✭✭✭Kiera


    Funny feckin story. I think i wont my housemate up laughin. Rim Ring him and just say nothing?


  • Advertisement
  • Closed Accounts Posts: 16,165 ✭✭✭✭brianthebard


    random wrote: »
    I think you should publish this. This is priceless material.
    Dear penthouse...


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,008 ✭✭✭Bijoux


    random wrote: »
    LOL .. "play it casual like it wasnt a big deal" ... :D

    Sorry .. it's late, I'm tired ..


    Ya.....easier said than done obviously! :pac:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,817 ✭✭✭✭Dord


    Is one of them from Tallaght and posts on boards by any chance?


  • Users Awaiting Email Confirmation Posts: 827 ✭✭✭Phlann


    btw I hope that's the last time I ever see the names 'Jimmy' and 'Paddy' in the same sentence as '**** the shyte out of his boner'

    *shudder*


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,797 ✭✭✭bobcar61


    That was well worth the read,it was hilarious.

    I don't know what I would do if it was my two best mates and I was in your position,I would probably say talk to him about the night but then again it might be too embarrassing for you to bring up so it might be easier to play it cool and keep it casual but you should definitely call him.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 469 ✭✭0utpost31


    As far as I know, they don't use boards.

    But they are on bebo, and I can set up an anonymous account and post the link to this thread. But that would be lousy, since they're my mates. I think.

    I can still hear it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,727 ✭✭✭✭Sherifu


    Dord wrote: »
    Is one of them from Tallaght and posts on boards by any chance?
    Lenny said he was too tired to post alright. It all fits.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 36,634 ✭✭✭✭Ruu_Old


    Get some of the action while you still can!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,676 ✭✭✭genericgoon


    0utpost31 wrote: »
    As far as I know, they don't use boards.

    But they are on bebo, and I can set up an anonymous account and post the link to this thread. But that would be lousy, since they're my mates. I think.

    I can still hear it.

    Bet you're having a tug to the thought right now. :D


  • Registered Users, Subscribers, Registered Users 2 Posts: 47,352 ✭✭✭✭Zaph


    Dord wrote: »
    Is one of them from Tallaght and posts on boards by any chance?

    :D


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 33,760 ✭✭✭✭Princess Consuela Bananahammock


    0utpost31 wrote: »
    As far as I know, they don't use boards.

    But they are on bebo, and I can set up an anonymous account and post the link to this thread. But that would be lousy, since they're my mates. I think.
    .

    In that case, I'm guessing the story had a sh1tload of exaggeration (especially re: amount drunk and time of incident) and that it's just down to a little preteen experimentation. They'll grow out of it before the Junior Cert at the latest.

    Everything I don't like is either woke or fascist - possibly both - pick one.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,716 ✭✭✭✭Earthhorse


    I am gay for this thread.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,138 ✭✭✭takola


    Dord wrote: »
    Is one of them from Tallaght and posts on boards by any chance?

    Feeling paranoid are we? :p

    :D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 260 ✭✭adsgirl


    0utpost31 wrote: »
    As far as I know, they don't use boards.

    But they are on bebo, and I can set up an anonymous account and post the link to this thread. But that would be lousy, since they're my mates. I think.

    I can still hear it.
    Ah no you wouldn't post a link on Bebo, god you are mates, try and talk to them..


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 469 ✭✭0utpost31


    Dord, they are not from tallaght. But one of them is from Dublin.

    I'm on holidays this week, with nothing to do, and I'd really like to call up to the main culprit, Paddy, and have a few pints.

    With my arse to the wall.

    The worst thing is, I'm bored shitless on my week and a half off work, and there's that mad World Culture Fest in Dun Leery (I couldn't be bothered spelling it - it's something like "loighre" is it??). Since we've all split up after college and gone our ways we usually get togeter and hit random towns and fests around the country for a weekend, tearing then place up. This Culture Festival is a great oppurtunity to get back together for a chat and a laugh.

    Glad ye enjoyed the story. I got a b1 in hons english and it's finally cumming oops coming to fruition.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,676 ✭✭✭genericgoon


    0utpost31 wrote: »
    Dord, they are not from tallaght. But one of them is from Dublin.

    I'm on holidays this week, with nothing to do, and I'd really like to call up to the main culprit, Paddy, and have a few pints.

    With my arse to the wall.

    The worst thing is, I'm bored shitless on my week and a half off work, and there's that mad World Culture Fest in Dun Leery (I couldn't be bothered spelling it - it's something like "loighre" is it??). Since we've all split up after college and gone our ways we usually get togeter and hit random towns and fests around the country for a weekend, tearing then place up. This Culture Festival is a great oppurtunity to get back together for a chat and a laugh. shag.

    Glad ye enjoyed the story. I got a b1 in hons english and it's finally cumming oops coming to fruition.

    Fixed


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 469 ✭✭0utpost31


    Ikky Poo, who isn't on bebo nowadays? (good idea for a poll..... maybe)

    Even yore ma is on bebo as well as other things.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,817 ✭✭✭✭Dord


    takola wrote: »
    Feeling paranoid are we? :p

    :D

    No, I'm not.. :pac:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 469 ✭✭0utpost31


    genericgoon ya bolix!!


  • Advertisement
  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,440 ✭✭✭GirlInterrupted


    0utpost31 wrote: »
    Dord, they are not from tallaght. But one of them is from Dublin.

    I'm on holidays this week, with nothing to do, and I'd really like to call up to the main culprit, Paddy, and have a few pints.

    With my arse to the wall.

    The worst thing is, I'm bored shitless on my week and a half off work, and there's that mad World Culture Fest in Dun Leery (I couldn't be bothered spelling it - it's something like "loighre" is it??). Since we've all split up after college and gone our ways we usually get togeter and hit random towns and fests around the country for a weekend, tearing then place up. This Culture Festival is a great oppurtunity to get back together for a chat and a laugh.

    Glad ye enjoyed the story. I got a b1 in hons english and it's finally cumming oops coming to fruition.


    Dun Laoghaire. Ring your mate. It may have been a little inconsiderate of him to er, do it, so er, close.... but he's still the same guy he always was.

    Good luck with the really awkward conversation....


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 33,760 ✭✭✭✭Princess Consuela Bananahammock


    0utpost31 wrote: »
    Ikky Poo, who isn't on bebo nowadays? (good idea for a poll..... maybe)

    Even yore ma is on bebo as well as other things.

    1 - everyone over 22

    2 - As I said in an earlier thread, she's your maw too, Brandine.

    Everything I don't like is either woke or fascist - possibly both - pick one.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 488 ✭✭Arathorn


    That story was hot, too good to be true


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,008 ✭✭✭Bijoux


    Fixed

    :pac: LOL


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,005 ✭✭✭✭Toto Wolfcastle


    Man up OP and talk to them.

    Worst case scenario you go your separate ways.

    On the other hand, you might end up getting some, so it might work out for the best.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,851 ✭✭✭PurpleFistMixer


    I can feel the heat of the flames before I type this, but... would you be as sickened were your friends both girls? Maybe your friends were just experimenting/never told you they're gay, or something.

    That said, doesn't excuse getting up to stuff while you're in the room. That's just poor form.


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,555 ✭✭✭✭AckwelFoley


    Get new drinkin friends..

    u cant trust dem gheys..

    great story

    snyper approved 'shock value' story


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 244 ✭✭KateF


    Woah!!! I'd be disgusted if a male and female friend did that in the same bed as me....so its still digusting behaviour. Gay or not. Friends or not. No one should ever be so inconsiderate. Yo just don't wanna hear or see that!! :eek:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 255 ✭✭baglady


    Ikky Poo2 wrote: »
    1 - everyone over 22 .

    so not true!!!

    OP, obviously if you try to talk to them it will be mega awkward but once you get it over and done with then hopefully things can start to go back to normal. I mean, he probably feels the same, he probably wants to talk to you as well, but doesn't know how to approach it. I would bite the bullet and go for it, if it means that much to you. Good luck :)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 469 ✭✭0utpost31


    I can feel the heat of the flames before I type this, but... would you be as sickened were your friends both girls?

    Dude if those two mates were girls I would have no willy left from rubbing it to a shtump thinking about it.

    Actually, I must try and set up the exact same scenario with my girl-mates. Same time, season, level of drunkeness.... mmmm.....


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 260 ✭✭adsgirl


    0utpost31 wrote: »
    Dude if those two mates were girls I would have no willy left from rubbing it to a shtump thinking about it.

    Actually, I must try and set up the exact same scenario with my girl-mates. Same time, season, level of drunkeness.... mmmm.....

    Will you write an article on it?


  • Advertisement
  • Closed Accounts Posts: 469 ✭✭0utpost31


    outpost31 wrote: »
    Who isn't on bebo nowadays??
    Ikky Poo2 wrote: »
    1 - everyone over 22

    Ikky Poo.... look at your username. You must still be sucking on yo' mommas titty.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 469 ✭✭0utpost31


    adsgirl wrote: »
    Will you write an article on it?

    I will definitely keep you guys updated.


  • Moderators, Education Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 35,125 Mod ✭✭✭✭AlmightyCushion


    So you're pissed off that Jimmy wanked off Paddy but wouldn't **** you off?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 260 ✭✭adsgirl


    0utpost31 wrote: »
    I will definitely keep you guys updated.

    Prepare for massive log in of posters into Ah:D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,005 ✭✭✭✭Toto Wolfcastle


    0utpost31 wrote: »
    Dude if those two mates were girls I would have no willy left from rubbing it to a shtump thinking about it.

    Actually, I must try and set up the exact same scenario with my girl-mates. Same time, season, level of drunkeness.... mmmm.....

    You get me Dita von Teese and I'll re-enact that same scenario for you.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,367 ✭✭✭Agamemnon


    0utpost31 wrote: »
    Jimmy had Paddys boner gripped tightly and was **** the shyte out if it.
    If that's what was coming out of Paddy's knob, then this is far from the first time this has happened.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 469 ✭✭0utpost31


    janeybabe wrote: »
    You get me Dita von Teese and I'll re-enact that same scenario for you.

    PM sent


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,366 ✭✭✭ninty9er


    Your friends are gay (or bi). Big whoop. They're still the same Jimmy and Paddy, except now you know something you didn't know before, like a best friend's birthday that you wouldn't have known immediately.

    Act as you normally woul


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,676 ✭✭✭genericgoon


    adsgirl wrote: »
    Will you write an article on it?

    I think you mean setup a webcam for it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,283 ✭✭✭Ross_Mahon


    This is just like a Tucker Max story, Gas!


  • Advertisement
This discussion has been closed.
Advertisement