sleeping with a guy first dates

lola_run

Is it always a bad move to sleep with a guy on the first, second or third date?

A friend of mine is convinced that it's impossible to know if a man likes a woman if he is not made wait... like six months or before getting engaged or married... before making love.

Rob_l

:eek: :eek:

Six months or married/engaged

So I take it this woman has never had sex due to no idiot man being born who would go out with such a domineering/lunatic

acctually no I do know someone who waited that long before!

patrickc

lola_run wrote:

Is it always a bad move to sleep with a guy on the first, second or third date?

A friend of mine is convinced that it's impossible to know if a man likes a woman if he is not made wait... like six months or before getting engaged or married... before making love.

this is AH and not PI so I say no it's all good, tell her to sleep with him 1st date....;)

Tak3n

2 hours seems an appropriate time to wait. Any longer and shes not interested and the guy should move on.

Tar.Aldarion

There is no correct time. Depends on teh people of course. Less time is better of course, and that is my objective subjective definite opinion.

Biggest load of bullcrap altogether. I dunno where this comes from to be honest. If the 2 of you are into it, then why the hell not go for it? This crap about "only slappers shag on the 1st date" is ridiculous, and you'd be more likely to chase someone away by deliberately holding out for 6 months, especially if you were dying for it yourself (to put it crudely). You'd end up getting pi$$ed out of your face and end up making a balls of it, or worse, pregnant cos you were too out of it to think straight.

In fact, I and a lot of blokes would be more likely to come back for more if we thought that she was more relaxed in her attitude towards sex.

I reckon the "she's a slut cos she only met him last week" thing is perpetuated by other women a lot more than by blokes.

Niamho!

lola_run wrote:

Is it always a bad move to sleep with a guy on the first, second or third date?

A friend of mine is convinced that it's impossible to know if a man likes a woman if he is not made wait... like six months or before getting engaged or married... before making love.

Thats a load of ****. not many men are ever gonna like her if thats the case.... thats just the way it is. there are not many men around now who are prepared to wait and i think your mate is fooling herself if she thinks there is. Harsh but true i think.

Dudess

Deleted User wrote:

I reckon the "she's a slut cos she only met him last week" thing is perpetuated by other women a lot more than by blokes.

Agreed. Just like body fascism - for which men get blamed.

OP, it depends on the person.

Duggy747

:eek: :eek:

6 months, or before marriage!?! Good grief!! A quick exchange of a fiver and a quick one in the jacks should be suffice.

Seriously though, in the circumstances of the dating game there's nothing wrong with the shag on the 1st date ( ) I'd probably wait till the 2nd or 3rd date myself, just so you know it's actually clicking and you don't end up being clawed in and then having to deal with a pyscho. Unleashing the Dragon I believe it's called when the true personality comes out after the shag. But again, that's the dating game. I'm more prone to the ol' "night out on the town" thing.

But if the 2 of ye are clicking together then shag the night away!! You'll always have dry-arses sticking their noses in your business where it don't belong.

KdjaCL

Duggy747 wrote:

Unleashing the Dragon I believe it's called when the true personality comes out after the shag.

before in my case

/pets trouser dragon



kdjac

Dudess

My cousin's with her fella over six and a half years and I've a feeling she hasn't slept with him :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:

She takes her catholicism very seriously (and seems to be good at sticking to the auld rules).

KdjaCL wrote:

before in my case

/pets trouser dragon

KdjaCL, you filthy young man!

arybvtcw0eolkf

Shagging on a first date, ya sure.

But its my experience that nothing good ever comes from it. Put it this way, I've never dated a girl I shagged on the first night.

Its usually bang 'em and leg it.

Cuddlesworth

Dudess wrote:

My cousin's with her fella over six and a half years and I've a feeling she hasn't slept with him :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:

She takes her catholicism very seriously (and seems to be good at sticking to the auld rules).

He must have some mean callouses.

tallus

Duggy747 wrote:

:eek: :eek:

6 months, or before marriage!?! Good grief!! A quick exchange of a fiver and a quick one in the jacks should be suffice.

Hmm what do you get for a fiver ?

Senna

Dudess wrote:

My cousin's with her fella over six and a half years and I've a feeling she hasn't slept with him :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:

he must have the right arm of a bodybuilder

MAYPOP

Mairt wrote:

Its usually bang 'em and leg it.

wyndham

Mairt wrote:

Its usually bang 'em and leg it.

Lol. Visions of you running down the road half dressed, zipping up your cacks and laughing your head off in the dawns early light.

Jesus Wept

lola_run wrote:

Is it always a bad move to sleep with a guy on the first, second or third date?

A friend of mine is convinced that it's impossible to know if a man likes a woman if he is not made wait... like six months or before getting engaged or married... before making love.

make love? What is this, a poem?

Anyhow, you will find the answer at 2 mins into this clip:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lkt9zMpV7CA

m83

Mitch Fatel... funny guy!

Terry

Blown to much of me time
Buyin' Dinner and Wine
And me money on flowers and lollies
Only to find
That what's on me mind
Isn't on hers and she's sorry
So I've made up some lines
That save wastin' time
And keep me from blowin' me brass
I'm ever so cool
I just prop on me stool
Right next to hers and I ask

Do you **** on first dates
Does you Dad own a brewery
Could I feel Your tits
Or would you show 'em to me
Cause you've got a nice head
And you look pretty honest
So me face'll be leavin' in quart of an hour
I'd like you to be on it

You know how it feels when you first meet a sheila
And the bull**** you gotta go through
Like callin' her up
An' tellin' her you love her
When all that you'd love is just a screw
But she wants to hold hands
And meet her old man
And sit around for hours and talk
But me new method is, you just cut through the ****
And get down to the goodies straight off

Do you **** on first dates
Does you Dad own a brewery
Could I feel Your tits
Or would you show 'em to me
Do you sleep in the nick
Do you give head very often
If we can decide you place or mine
We can **** off then

You know how it feels when you first meet a sheila
An you'd give a weeks pay to hold her
Don't sit actin' dumb
Just front her full on
and drop a few lines that I told ya
This new method of mine
Doesn't work every time, but then again no method does
I've been spat at and slapped
and need in the nackers
But then I've got a few ****s as well

Do you **** on first dates
Does you Dad own a brewery
Could I feel Your tits
Or would you show 'em to me
If the answer is no
to me questions above
Then be a good sport and give me the name
Of a girlfriend who does

.

Seth Brundle

first date?
feckin tramps - bring back the no sex before marriage ethos

Reku

Dudess wrote:

Agreed. Just like body fascism - for which men get blamed.

OP, it depends on the person.

Yet any women I have made this point to have vehemently denied it and start claiming that "oh no, I've never heard a woman say that, I have heard numerous men say it though", yet oddly I've found the opposite...
Is it possible no-one infact says it and it's all in our heads?

Anyway as to how long you should wait:
minimum:- long enough to verify he has no STDs and to get contraception.
Ideal:- long enough to at least be friends if not better, the post-sex cuddling is so much nicer then.

In this day and age you don't have the time to wait for marriage to start putting your all into a relationship, especially those women out there who want kids (and any who want to use science to have them post menopause should simply be told NO! I feel, artificial inception was meant for those who couldn't have kids, not those who were just too busy/self absorbed/felt no man was worthy).

Black Swan

Everybody is different. Some separate sex from love, while others cannot. Some toss religion into it or upbringing. I cannot separate sex from love, nor do I believe in love at first sight, so sleeping on the first date won't happen with me. Besides, to make it really passionate and grand, you need to know and care about your partner. Don't think there is a magic number of dates or length of time, although I'm certain (for me) it's not the first date.

randylonghorn

lola_run wrote:

A friend of mine is convinced that it's impossible to know if a man likes a woman if he is not made wait... like six months or before getting engaged or married... before making love.

Who told her that? ... her grand-aunt the nun? :rolleyes:

Might have had some validity when cailiní were dancing at the crossroads guarded by battalions of priests with blackthorn sticks, but societies change, and social mores in Ireland have undergone major changes in the last few decades.

Tbh, while I certainly don't expect any woman to ride the cowboy on the first date (not that I would object either! ) I think if we were heading for six months I would be worrying about what kind of emotional / sexual hangups were driving her, and would probably be very tempted to head for the hills, tbh.

Edit @ Terry: Kevin Wilson?

Tha Gopher

Im more shocked that people in the real world still say "sleeping with"

K-9

Depends on the person alright.

6 Mths? After 4 or 5 dates I'd be wondering whats wrong? Is there no spark or attraction?

On a first date, there is also the chance she was just wanting shag as well or was embarassed and you'll never see her again. Maybe the night went too well, she doesn't normally do it and it just felt right. Usually with those girls it dosn't feel right the next day.

Usually, waiting a date or 2 is better and helps with the imagination too.

jellie

this has come up with a friend of mine. his opinion seemed to be that a girl that had sex with him quickly (as in 1st night) wasnt the kind of girl hed want a relationship with, though hes perfectly happy to be with her that night.

MAYPOP

sar84 wrote:

though hes perfectly happy to be with her that night.

sometimes, that's just what we want

Pherekydes

Mairt wrote:

But its my experience that nothing good ever comes from it. Put it this way, I've never dated a girl I shagged on the first night.

Let me disabuse you of this notion. Still with my first-date-shag after 17 years (and 4 kids).

lola_run

Slow coach wrote:

Let me disabuse you of this notion. Still with my first-date-shag after 17 years (and 4 kids).

Wow! Thanks for that!

I do think my friend is generalising. I mean you can't date a person for ages before you even touch each other, although you do have to be sensible (if you're looking for something long-term) and be able to judge when a guy is just after you for one thing. However, if a guy brings a girl presents on a regular basis and keeps in regular contact with phone and sms I guess these are signs that he appreciates her for other things besides sex.

randylonghorn

lola_run wrote:

... although you do have to be sensible (if you're looking for something long-term) and be able to judge when a guy is just after you for one thing.

... or a girl, these days! (and fair play, sez I!)

Seriously, I think it's all about the people involved, their attitudes, what they're looking for and how they actually feel about one another ... and feck all to do with some imaginary set of "rules".

To echo Slow coach, I know a couple who never even made it as far as dinner on their first official date (though admittedly they had known one another slightly for years) and are still very happily together 8 years on. No kids as yet, but that was a deliberate decision, they're starting to think about it now.

And rumour has it they still miss dinner now and again ...

Anto McC

If you haven't dropped the lámh within 2 hours, give up, go home and look after yourself. That my experience anyway.

Dudess

MAYPOP wrote:

sometimes, that's just what we want

That's cool as long as the girl feels the same. If a girl wants things to develop into something more and you don't, then don't shag her. Likewise if you reverse the genders.

Dave!

It's highly recommended.

2 stroke

Keep looking untill you meet someone you can't resist, hopefuly they cant resist you either. It bothers me that so many carry on dating people they don't realy fancy. When 2 people realy have the hots for each other is it better for them to share some mutual satisfaction or to masturbate separately.

Dirk Gently

Slow coach wrote:

Still with my first-date-shag after 17 years (and 4 kids).

First kid a result of first date shag?

StephenC_IRL

ride him first date, simple as !

eoinhealy

Call me old fashioned but if the girl wants to wait until she is completly ready thats her choice. If the man can wait that long then it just shows that he really loves her, and if the love is that strong then it worth waiting. There is much more to a relationship than just sex.

Anto McC

What if the man wants to wait because he has problems getting an erection?

Steez

Then they'll have a beautiful friendship

eoinhealy

Then he has 2 choices...

1. The embarrasing way and tell her. She might understand and make him feel more comfortable and relaxed or

2. Go to the chemist and get viagra and say nothing.


In any situation in a serious relationship, honesty is usually the best policy.

Anto McC

I have to admit mate, that i was completely taking the piss when i asked that question but you answer well all the same

Pherekydes

clown bag wrote:

First kid a result of first date shag?

Nope. And the hand wasn't dropped after 2 hours, as someone else mentioned. Just sat and talked all night, no loud music, no dinner, no sloppy kissing or groping.

Hey, I'll tell you this, we knew each other a lot better after 3 hours than most couples would know each other after months.

Anto McC

Slow coach wrote:

Nope. And the hand wasn't dropped after 2 hours, as someone else mentioned.

That was me and you obviously live up to your username then

K-9

lola_run wrote:

be able to judge when a guy is just after you for one thing. However, if a guy brings a girl presents on a regular basis and keeps in regular contact with phone and sms I guess these are signs that he appreciates her for other things besides sex.

Could be the presents are because he only wants one thing!

Anto McC

Seanies32 wrote:

Could be the presents are because he only wants one thing!

Especially if they consist of lingerie, a big rubber dildo and a hardcore porn movie etc

arybvtcw0eolkf

Slow coach wrote:

Let me disabuse you of this notion. Still with my first-date-shag after 17 years (and 4 kids).

Yes, but I legged it before you arrived

Pherekydes

Mairt wrote:

Yes, but I legged it before you arrived

I know. And you're still with my ex-wife. Fair play to you. But I got the better deal. And the kids.

jester77

What's the definition of a first date?
Is that when you ask someone out or do people count shagging someone you met 15 mins earlier while out and about as a first date?

K-9

Anto McC wrote:

Especially if they consist of lingerie, a big rubber dildo and a hardcore porn movie etc

Subtle!

Rob_l

lola_run wrote:

However, if a guy brings a girl presents on a regular basis .

WTF :eek: :eek:

Right this is a wind up yeah