Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi all! We have been experiencing an issue on site where threads have been missing the latest postings. The platform host Vanilla are working on this issue. A workaround that has been used by some is to navigate back from 1 to 10+ pages to re-sync the thread and this will then show the latest posts. Thanks, Mike.
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Returning emigrants who big themselves up in an unsuccessful bid to impress

1235»

Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,359 ✭✭✭ceadaoin.


    My opinion would be what’s the good in doing well if your not living among family and friends.

    There is plenty of opportunity to do well for yourself in Ireland, even more so for people who live around home and have access to a free site to build a house on (a house many living abroad could only dream of). Ireland is one of the best places in the world to live in, people move here from every corner of the world. I really just don’t understand why anyone would want to leave

    Maybe because most people don't just get given a "free site" and if they did, they wouldn't have the money to build a house. Also, have you seen the standard of houses in countries like the US? Like seriously, most irish people could only dream of owning a house that is just a normal one there. Its really not that hard to understand why anyone would leave.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,435 ✭✭✭mandrake04


    My opinion would be what’s the good in doing well if your not living among family and friends.

    Well thats all that is just your narrow opinion which you are entitled to, people can always make new friends and make their own family and still lead a fulfilling quality of life.

    Plenty people live abroad, move home.... then they move abroad again.

    They would have a far broader opinion than you.


  • Registered Users Posts: 894 ✭✭✭cian68



    even more so for people who live around home and have access to a free site to build a house on

    Sure if I had that opportunity I'd never leave my parents post code but I'm not sure that is the norm


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,435 ✭✭✭mandrake04


    cian68 wrote: »
    Sure if I had that opportunity I'd never leave my parents post code but I'm not sure that is the norm

    I have that opportunity, but even then it’s not ideal as I would presumably have to work in Dublin which is at best 1.5hr commute. This was always my backup plan for the last 20 years, but it’s funny how an open mind and unintentional choices can influence the hand of fate on your shoulder and guide you to unexpected opportunities.


  • Posts: 17,728 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    My opinion would be what’s the good in doing well if your not living among family and friends.

    There is plenty of opportunity to do well for yourself in Ireland, even more so for people who live around home and have access to a free site to build a house on (a house many living abroad could only dream of). Ireland is one of the best places in the world to live in, people move here from every corner of the world. I really just don’t understand why anyone would want to leave

    Weren't you in galway for years as you couldn't get a job in Cork? If you had to go to England or wherever for work you would have done so.
    Your family weren't in galway and you had to bring your laundry home to mammy every weekend iirc.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,806 ✭✭✭Sunny Disposition


    Even the collison brothers have to come home for a pint down the local occasionally!

    Those lads seem quite grounded, doubt they steer
    Conversations around to their income to people they know from old and meet once every year or two.


  • Posts: 24,714 [Deleted User]


    Augeo wrote: »
    Weren't you in galway for years as you couldn't get a job in Cork? If you had to go to England or wherever for work you would have done so.
    Your family weren't in galway and you had to bring your laundry home to mammy every weekend iirc.

    I wouldn’t have. I spent a brief period in the Uk but absolutely hated living away from Ireland so I packed in the job and moved home. I just stuck it out without a job from then until something suitable could be found Ireland (excluding Dublin as I never wanted to live there either).

    Your locations are the wrong way around also. But living elsewhere in Ireland from home was ok with me as it was always temporary and always easy to head home any day you felt like it. Also same pace of life, same news on the tv, same everything really and totally different to being abroad. I always angled by career to make sure it would give me opportunities close to home sooner or later and I managed that over a year ago. It just happens so also be a pretty good career but I’d have settled for lesser jobs to enable me settle down back home.

    Just to add I’ve no issue with people who want to live abroad, good luck to them I just find it very very hard to understand why people want to do it, an opinion I’m very entitled to have. I was just talking to a neighbour last weekend who was saying how great it is I’m settling down back at home and how they are so disappointed that two of their children are fairly settled abroad and show no signs of returning. They would love to be seeing them everyday and be doing stuff together the way I do with my parents.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,474 ✭✭✭Obvious Desperate Breakfasts


    My opinion would be what’s the good in doing well if your not living among family and friends.

    There is plenty of opportunity to do well for yourself in Ireland, even more so for people who live around home and have access to a free site to build a house on (a house many living abroad could only dream of). Ireland is one of the best places in the world to live in, people move here from every corner of the world. I really just don’t understand why anyone would want to leave

    While there are immigrants from many countries, let’s not kid ourselves that it’s a major dream location. We’re a minor nation and the weather alone puts a lot of people off.

    As for a free site, my parents had one for me but I didn’t use it as it would have meant staying in an economically-depressed part of the country. I’m glad my parents made money from selling it instead.


  • Posts: 24,714 [Deleted User]


    While there are immigrants from many countries, let’s not kid ourselves that it’s a major dream location. We’re a minor nation and the weather alone puts a lot of people off.

    As for a free site, my parents had one for me but I didn’t use it as it would have meant staying in an economically-depressed part of the country. I’m glad my parents made money from selling it instead.

    The site was more of an example of one way how it can be beneficial to your finances to be living in your home area. I would definitely see in my group of friends that the people who have always lived at home/around the home area or have moved back to settle down are more financially secure also, own their own homes sooner and with smaller mortgages, have much cheaper or free child care etc.

    As for econimcially depressed areas, yes there are but in most cases people are within a reasonable commute of a city large town with lots of employers and if living in their home area (or even living in Ireland for good) is your goal then you should be tailoring your area of work and work experience to match the jobs available.

    Also Ireland is far from a minor nation we have one of the best places in the world to live for a long list of reasons and we are a very important country in word business (tech, medical and pharma in particular), world agriculture and tourism among other things.

    Anyway the above isn’t really what the thread is about to me it’s one part of why I want to live in Ireland but there are many others, simply not wanting to live abroad being a main reason.


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,103 ✭✭✭Mr.Wemmick


    Hope this thread doesn’t come off like I dislike most people who emigrate and come back.
    It’s really just ones who do a lot of boasting in a short space of time in an effort to impress.

    I suppose what’s really interesting is why such a person would want to impress someone they mightn’t see again for a year or two.

    There is no perfect place to live. All places have their positives and negatives.. and I reckon those who come back and talk up their position in life in their new adopted country has more to do with them trying to convince themselves of their own success in living somewhere new, grass greener etc.. and using the old crowd as an audience for that purpose.

    Truth is you can live anywhere and be happy. I have moved umpteen times and lived all over. I can tell you all the sh!te things about each place and the positives. No matter where we are in the world, we largely stay the same and could easily live anywhere. We just need to let go of the idea that one place is better than another, it's not.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,816 ✭✭✭skooterblue2


    ceadaoin. wrote: »
    Maybe because most people don't just get given a "free site" and if they did, they wouldn't have the money to build a house.

    A free site isnt everything it is cracked up to be either. I have the chance of one and its the back end of nowhere I would never stand a chance of getting a proper job. Then you have to put with your parents interfering with your wifes opinions. Recipe for disaster. That is bad enough you have to work out an exit strategy or live with the consequences for 20 years.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,426 ✭✭✭Jamsiek


    As for econimcially depressed areas, yes there are but in most cases people are within a reasonable commute of a city large town with lots of employers and if living in their home area (or even living in Ireland for good) is your goal then you should be tailoring your area of work and work experience to match the jobs available.

    Ireland is and for a long time been one of the most centralized countries in Europe with most opportunities centred around Dublin which is the most expensive city in the euro zone right now.
    Most of the cities around Ireland are small with little to offer many people in various professions.
    Also Ireland is far from a minor nation we have one of the best places in the world to live for a long list of reasons and we are a very important country in word business (tech, medical and pharma in particular), world agriculture and tourism among other things.
    But still emigration remains high which shows people still have reasons to leave. Where I live, the Irish community is huge and still getting bigger, although a lot of that is down to the quality of life keeping them here, etc.
    Anyway the above isn’t really what the thread is about to me it’s one part of why I want to live in Ireland but there are many others, simply not wanting to live abroad being a main reason.
    That’s fine, but for many people, it’s not enough.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,874 ✭✭✭Edgware


    A free site isnt everything it is cracked up to be either. I have the chance of one and its the back end of nowhere I would never stand a chance of getting a proper job. Then you have to put with your parents interfering with your wifes opinions. Recipe for disaster. That is bad enough you have to work out an exit strategy or live with the consequences for 20 years.

    But Mary would like the site so she can be near Mammy, Auntie Bridie and all her cousins.
    Then she can start popping out littles P.J. and Maggies and you can spend your life wondering how the **** you ended up there


  • Posts: 24,714 [Deleted User]


    A free site isnt everything it is cracked up to be either. I have the chance of one and its the back end of nowhere I would never stand a chance of getting a proper job. Then you have to put with your parents interfering with your wifes opinions. Recipe for disaster. That is bad enough you have to work out an exit strategy or live with the consequences for 20 years.

    People don’t actually believe these soap opera mother in law and daughter in law fighting stories do they? My wife gets on brilliantly with my mother and has no hesitation whatsoever in living next door to her and next door to other family members who also have houses close by too.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,584 ✭✭✭✭elperello


    Edgware wrote: »
    But Mary would like the site so she can be near Mammy, Auntie Bridie and all her cousins.
    Then she can start popping out littles P.J. and Maggies and you can spend your life wondering how the **** you ended up there

    And alternatively you could live a happy life among people who care about you who would be there for you if you need them.

    And if you were lucky yourself and Mary might be blessed with healthy children who would bring great joy to you both.


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,461 ✭✭✭Bubbaclaus


    People don’t actually believe these soap opera mother in law and daughter in law fighting stories do they? My wife gets on brilliantly with my mother and has no hesitation whatsoever in living next door to her and next door to other family members who also have houses close by too.

    Of course your wife and mother get along great, they are second cousins after all.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,426 ✭✭✭Jamsiek


    People don’t actually believe these soap opera mother in law and daughter in law fighting stories do they? My wife gets on brilliantly with my mother and has no hesitation whatsoever in living next door to her and next door to other family members who also have houses close by too.

    It happens though, I know a guy who’s wife left him over his mother interfering in their marriage. She couldn’t live there any longer. Sad situation especially for the kids


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,816 ✭✭✭skooterblue2


    Jamsiek wrote: »
    It happens though, I know a guy who’s wife left him over his mother interfering in their marriage. She couldn’t live there any longer. Sad situation especially for the kids

    Yeah, heard that one too often. Mothers and Daughters in Law/ Fathers and sons in Law who dont know where the boundaries are drawn. "But we gave ye a site off the farm!"
    Dont start with that crap. My first girlfriend, her father had a face like a bull dog that had a face like a bulldog that stuck his face in a nest of hornets. God be good to the man, he was tormented, I know that now. I wouldnt want him as a neighbour. My girlfriend at the time wanted us all to live together. That marriage would have been fine if they all moved 10 miles down the road. It makes bad family history and blood that lasts for years afterwards.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,816 ✭✭✭skooterblue2


    Edgware wrote: »
    But Mary would like the site so she can be near Mammy, Auntie Bridie and all her cousins.
    Then she can start popping out littles P.J. and Maggies and you can spend your life wondering how the **** you ended up there

    You are constructing a nightmare there. Firstly you are indebting one side of the family more so than the other. Then you are dissolving proper family authority and constructs where a young couple need to find their own feet. I like my mother in law but she is 20 miles away and I wouldnt want her in my kitchen every morning when I leave and every evening when I get home. Proper space and borders. Good borders make good neighbours.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,435 ✭✭✭mandrake04


    I think we are going off topic, all this talk of sites, living with parents, family feuds and marrying cousins sounds like Rathkeale.


  • Advertisement
  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,816 ✭✭✭skooterblue2


    mandrake04 wrote: »
    I think we are going off topic, all this talk of sites, living with parents, family feuds and marrying cousins sounds like Rathkeale.

    You are nothing but a bucket o' sh-ite and I am calling you and your lot out. I bate your brother around the place and when I was done I bate your father and now I am calling you out now in 2020. You just name the time and the place and I will be there with my crew. The Horse fair or Buttervant you know I will show up.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,816 ✭✭✭skooterblue2


    People don’t actually believe these soap opera mother in law and daughter in law fighting stories do they? My wife gets on brilliantly with my mother and has no hesitation whatsoever in living next door to her and next door to other family members who also have houses close by too.

    Buddy its been documented in the Bible and the Koran that you need to keep a bit of distance between these two parties.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,343 ✭✭✭dwayneshintzy


    Edgware wrote: »
    Some people prefer not to travel and continue to live in some one horse town with a high level of inbreeding between cousins unknownst ( some times) to each other.. Highlight of the week is the two Martys.
    Marty on Winning Streak and Marty of the Sunday Game giving the rundown on d'match that was on d'telly
    Which Marty is it that gives the rundown of "d'match" on the Sunday Game?


  • Posts: 24,714 [Deleted User]


    Buddy its been documented in the Bible and the Koran that you need to keep a bit of distance between these two parties.

    There will be 100 metres between our houses (less if you use side gates and walk through the field). Is that far enough for you?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,816 ✭✭✭skooterblue2


    There will be 100 metres between our houses (less if you use side gates and walk through the field). Is that far enough for you?

    Distance helps but its really about borders.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,874 ✭✭✭Edgware


    There will be 100 metres between our houses (less if you use side gates and walk through the field). Is that far enough for you?
    You'd still need to keep the window closed when you're riding or Mammy might hear


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,584 ✭✭✭✭elperello


    Edgware wrote: »
    You'd still need to keep the window closed when you're riding or Mammy might hear

    You underestimate Grannies.

    Where do you reckon they think little PJ and Maggie came from?

    Besides in an apartment in the Bronx you could have an Italian Mama listening in from the floor above.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,816 ✭✭✭skooterblue2


    Edgware wrote: »
    You'd still need to keep the window closed when you're riding or Mammy might hear

    Do you remember the scene from the "Savage Eye"?
    The one where the Mother in law is correcting the new daughter in law?
    "You're not doing it right, He likes his potato mashed fluffy"
    "You're not doing it right, You're holding the baby the wrong way"
    Later at night when the couple are in bed at nocturnal activities in the dark,
    and she is facilitating him orally... the door opens....
    "You're not doing it right. You need to caress his balls"
    Son nods enthusiastically and grins.


  • Registered Users Posts: 28 huddledDuke12


    It sounds like someone has a not-so "Sunny Disposition"! ;)

    Anyway, I have many mates who have been abroad and have shared their experiences upon their return to The Emerald Isle at the Christmas period. While I am a bit of a home bird myself due to my sentimental nature, I can also appreciate why others do go abroad whether it be a lifestyle choice or out of necessity for their career. I love hearing about their new lives and career paths.

    It just comes off as petty and resentful when people are so overwhelmed that their friends succeeded abroad.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,806 ✭✭✭Sunny Disposition


    It sounds like someone has a not-so "Sunny Disposition"! ;)

    Anyway, I have many mates who have been abroad and have shared their experiences upon their return to The Emerald Isle at the Christmas period. While I am a bit of a home bird myself due to my sentimental nature, I can also appreciate why others do go abroad whether it be a lifestyle choice or out of necessity for their career. I love hearing about their new lives and career paths.

    It just comes off as petty and resentful when people are so overwhelmed that their friends succeeded abroad.

    Rapier wit my boy.


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,435 ✭✭✭mandrake04



    It just comes off as petty and resentful when people are so overwhelmed that their friends succeeded abroad.

    In fairness the OP did say that the guy is not really a friend but more of an acquaintance, what he saying is he thinks it’s strange that the guy (apparently) volunteered the details within 30 sec of being asked about the weather in Auckland.

    We have to take OP at face value here, in that he says that’s the way it happened but he also said that it was a 20 minute conversation, 20 minutes conversation with an acquaintance is a fair old chat so I would imagine there’s a lot of details about a lot of things in there. It’s just the bit about hyper income and his role that OP wasn’t impressed by.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,806 ✭✭✭Sunny Disposition


    Your man is back from New Zealand for a while now.

    He has sought to immerse himself in local life, training hurling teams, local committees etc. He has quickly developed a reputation as being utterly, utterly insufferable. My neighbour read an article about someone called 'The Pothole' because people swerved to avoid him, and he refers to your man as the pothole now.

    I guess the question is a wider one than first posed, it's why he acts the way he does at all times now. It actually wasn't related to insecurity about being an emigrant at all.





  • mod

    @Sunny Disposition please dont bump 3 year old threads.

    closed



This discussion has been closed.
Advertisement