Eight years ago, my life changed because of drugs. My story.

02-04-2016 04:55PM #1

When I was younger, I was the funniest person in the room. I was successful, nailed uni and had a good job in a bank. I had a great personality.

I had three years of amazing times on acid while doing everything I needed to do. Then I had a mad night where I ended up taking some "legal" drugs and acid at the same time. Chaos, terror and tears ensued and my personality changed forever. I couldn't look at people for months.

I spent about six months trying to get my old personality back. Didn't work. So I left Ireland.
I traveled around Asia. Didn't work. I could manage to be mad but not fun and nice.
In the end, I decided to not go to Australia because I knew my head was screwed so I spent a few months more in Asia learning how to be social and make friends again. Which used to be so easy. It kind of worked.

Five or six years later, my personality is still a bit "off". I've never gotten back my interest in people. I have an amazing girlfriend and we have a great life but I miss the old me. I wish she could see and experience how much life and energy I had, and lost that night.

I'm fine. I can laugh. But the difference is black and white.

MrStuffins · 02-04-2016 04:56PM

Cool drug story bro

Fr_Dougal · 02-04-2016 04:57PM

Go on, caller, go on...

TheHillOfDoom · 02-04-2016 04:58PM

Sorry to hear that. Are you clean of all drugs now?

02-04-2016 05:00PM

TheHillOfDoom wrote: »

Sorry to hear that. Are you clean of all drugs now?

Yea, for years now. Everyone thinks it's fun and games and they think they can handle anything.

I woke up different. I could feel it and it never left.

diomed · 02-04-2016 05:02PM

Why did you take drugs?

02-04-2016 05:02PM

Surely the lowest point of your 2008 was joining Boards.ie?

Lost in Time · 02-04-2016 05:04PM

I remember reading on a drugs forum where some guy said he wasn't the same after taking mdma. Killed himself half way through the thread. Scary.

Nomis21 · 02-04-2016 05:04PM

"had a good job in a bank"

Is that why you started taking drugs?

Specialun · 02-04-2016 05:05PM

Jayop · 02-04-2016 05:06PM

Acid is the only drug I'd believe a personality change on one dose. Mental drug

Alf Stewart. · 02-04-2016 05:06PM

Drugs are bad kids mmmmmmkay.

Never dabbled with it meself, got into more than my fair share of bother with the grog in me day, never felt the need to take the illegal shìt tbh.

Hope your recovery eventually takes place op.

sabat · 02-04-2016 05:08PM

From reading about your usage history and the night in question, I'm guessing that the 'legal high' just accelerated a process and highlighted the damage that was already well under way due to your habitual acid use. I reckon the average person can go on a maximum of about 20 hallucinogenic trips of whatever type over a lifetime before they lose their marbles to some extent.
You never even know, it might actually have done you a favour in the long run and prevented you becoming a proper acid casualty.

Schwiiing · 02-04-2016 05:13PM

Deleted User wrote: »

When I was younger, I was the funniest person in the room. I was successful, nailed uni and had a good job in a bank. I had a great personality.

I had three years of amazing times on acid while doing everything I needed to do. Then I had a mad night where I ended up taking some "legal" drugs and acid at the same time. Chaos, terror and tears ensued and my personality changed forever. I couldn't look at people for months.

I spent about six months trying to get my old personality back. Didn't work. So I left Ireland.
I traveled around Asia. Didn't work. I could manage to be mad but not fun and nice.
In the end, I decided to not go to Australia because I knew my head was screwed so I spent a few months more in Asia learning how to be social and make friends again. Which used to be so easy. It kind of worked.

Five or six years later, my personality is still a bit "off". I've never gotten back my interest in people. I have an amazing girlfriend and we have a great life but I miss the old me. I wish she could see and experience how much life and energy I had, and lost that night.

I'm fine. I can laugh. But the difference is black and white.

Your own choice, your own fault.

No sympathy here.

TheHillOfDoom · 02-04-2016 05:14PM

I went to see a psychiatrist years ago for depression and he asked me about drug use. I told him that I had used E twice in my youth and on the second time got a really bad paranoid buzz. He looked at me with raised eyebrows and said 'hmmmm, interesting'.

Not sure whether he was implying that my bad buzz was because I was prone to depression or whether the drugs had potentially triggered me to be prone to depression.
In any case, don't look back on those times with euphoric recall. Life is a journey. Your girlfriend loves you just as you are now. Try to accept your new normal.

Little CuChulainn · 02-04-2016 05:15PM

You spent three years on acid and you blame your personality change on one night on a legal high?

tomwaterford · 02-04-2016 05:17PM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Yea, for years now. Everyone thinks it's fun and games and they think they can handle anything.

I woke up different. I could feel it and it never left.

Would you try it again??

I believe ya....it's a very unfortunate thing to happen,...but look it...such is life and the risks you take

I do believe stories like this would highlight the risks of drugs to kids....not bullsgit stories told to kids in schools

Lights On · 02-04-2016 05:17PM

Moderation is key, like everything. Acid is the kind of thing you only need to be doing once or twice a year at most if you're taking it.

TheHillOfDoom · 02-04-2016 05:17PM

Schwiiing wrote: »

Your own choice, your own fault.

No sympathy here.

To be fair, I don't think the OP is looking for sympathy. I read it that he is trying to warn others of the dangers.

20Cent · 02-04-2016 05:19PM

Bit like drinking 10 pints then blaming the burger on the way home for feeling sick the next day.

deandean · 02-04-2016 05:20PM

Have I got this right? So one night of heavy use (albeit with a hx of acid use) led to permanent mental impairment?

Jeebus.

Liberosis · 02-04-2016 05:20PM

Lights On wrote: »

Moderation is key, like everything. Acid is the kind of thing you only need to be doing once or twice a year at most if you're taking it.

Or, y'know, just don't take it at all...

TheHillOfDoom · 02-04-2016 05:21PM

20Cent wrote: »

Bit like drinking 10 pints then blaming the burger on the way home for feeling sick the next day.

Not remotely. The OP is clearly acknowledging the cause of the change in his personality i.e. prolonged acid use + adding more into the mix.

02-04-2016 05:21PM

Schwiiing wrote: »

Your own choice, your own fault.

No sympathy here.

Eight years later, you think I'd post this for that.. It's merely a warning.

Little CuChulainn wrote: »

You spent three years on acid and you blame your personality change on one night on a legal high?

Yes, it was a change that happened within a day. And while it was for three years, its was every two months or so instead of drinking.

tomwaterford · 02-04-2016 05:21PM

deandean wrote: »

Have I got this right? So one night of heavy use (albeit with a hx of acid use) led to permanent mental impairment?

Jeebus.

Thinking the two reacted to each other??

Menas · 02-04-2016 05:22PM

I tried acid twice. Once with someone and we had a great night. We had someone looking after us who was not tripping though, to help keep us on enjoying it and not going dark.

I tried it on my own the second time and it was a nightmare. Walls melting, paranoid....I ended up a bumbling mess and panicking that the acid would never wear off. It did wear off after about 14 hours.
I had a couple of flashbacks over the next year but would never touch a hallucinogenic again.

Some people can take it with no/little ill effect, some cant.

dixiefly · 02-04-2016 05:23PM

Deleted User wrote: »

When I was younger, I was the funniest person in the room. I was successful, nailed uni and had a good job in a bank. I had a great personality.

I had three years of amazing times on acid while doing everything I needed to do. Then I had a mad night where I ended up taking some "legal" drugs and acid at the same time. Chaos, terror and tears ensued and my personality changed forever. I couldn't look at people for months.

I spent about six months trying to get my old personality back. Didn't work. So I left Ireland.
I traveled around Asia. Didn't work. I could manage to be mad but not fun and nice.
In the end, I decided to not go to Australia because I knew my head was screwed so I spent a few months more in Asia learning how to be social and make friends again. Which used to be so easy. It kind of worked.

Five or six years later, my personality is still a bit "off". I've never gotten back my interest in people. I have an amazing girlfriend and we have a great life but I miss the old me. I wish she could see and experience how much life and energy I had, and lost that night.

I'm fine. I can laugh. But the difference is black and white.

I havent read all of the thread, but this stood out. In my humble opinion this was / is your problem not just the mix on the night.

Liberosis · 02-04-2016 05:24PM

tomwaterford wrote: »

Thinking the two reacted to each other??

Either that, or maybe it was a bad batch or something.

thattequilagirl · 02-04-2016 05:24PM

Schwiiing wrote: »

Your own choice, your own fault.

No sympathy here.

This is such an overly simplistic response.

OP, I feel for you.

In my early 20s, I became more and more dependent on alcohol, a legal, society-approved drug. It totally changed my personality, but instead of happening overnight, it happened slowly - so much so I barely even realised it was happening.

I quit drinking two years ago, and my life is so much better now, but I don't think I'll ever 100% get back who I was.

I experiemented with pills and acid too, but thankfully never had a bad experience, my ex did though.

Lights On · 02-04-2016 05:24PM

Liberosis wrote: »

Or, y'know, just don't take it at all...

Yeah of course, if you don't want to take it it's not mandatory! But if you do want to try it/enjoy using it, doing it responsibly is the right way to do it, not going overboard.

thattequilagirl · 02-04-2016 05:27PM

dixiefly wrote: »

I havent read all of the thread, but this stood out. In my humble opinion this was / is your problem not just the mix on the night.

Unless you've taken hallucenogenics, it's hard to describe the impact it has on you. I believe it happened to me too, but luckily mine was a positive experience. If something fundamental changes overnight, you know.

Eight years ago, my life changed because of drugs. My story.

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