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‘People think I’m the devil for having an abortion, but it’s the only option that&

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  • #332
    eviltwin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    pwurple wrote: »
    ???
    How can you say that it's not normal because you had a different experience of it.

    Would you like to be told you're not "normal"?

    It's just different. She sounds like she was pressured into it in the first place. Perfectly "normal" to regret doing something you were not sure about.

    Do you think carrying around a huge mental burden like that is normal? Someone should have organised counselling for that woman years ago.


  • #333
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,809 ✭✭✭✭smash


    bjork wrote: »
    Are condoms the only type of protection?

    The pill etc isn't 100% either. I used condoms as an example because RobertKK did.


  • #334
    K4t
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,362 ✭✭✭K4t


    B_Wayne wrote: »
    Every time a person masturbates you may have lost out on the cure for cancer by this logic... There's always a road not taken,part of life. Could be the next Hitler,mass murderer etc too for all you know but possibilities are just possibilities, nothing more.
    He's right, I might possibly be the reason we lose the life that would cure cancer tonight...
    How will I go on knowing the millions of deaths I will be responsible for! The shame! The guilt!


  • #335
    bjork
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,554 ✭✭✭bjork


    sup_dude wrote: »
    Sperm create life, don't they?



    Are all contraceptive fool proof?

    No but there seems to be a lot of fools about.


  • #336
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,809 ✭✭✭✭smash


    RobertKK wrote: »
    There is a varying degree of fertility.

    I guess all women should be forced to get checked to see where they fit on the scale before they have sex... :rolleyes:


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  • #337
    Ave Sodalis
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,555 ✭✭✭Ave Sodalis


    wonderfullife wrote: »
    This "never met" anyone line of arguing has to stop. Can you not see how ridiculous it is?

    I've never met a rapist, serial killer, I've never met a zoologist or marine biologist, I've never met anybody from Guatemala and I've certainly never met anybody who plays the trombone.

    All these people do exist.

    Likewise some people get pregnant via one night stands or flings and decide to keeo the baby, in full knowledge its a decision to become a single parent - for the moment.

    Except you don't know how many I've met...

    They do. Maybe they don't think they can have an abortion, maybe they can't afford one, maybe they don't think they can deal with adoption. Either way, I very very much doubt any of them set out to be a single parent.


  • #338
    Shrap
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,163 ✭✭✭Shrap


    wonderfullife wrote: »
    Well in my case we had been together 3 years and I wasn't going anywhere. I'm still in touch with her today a decade later. But yes I agree that is a worry for many who have an unplanned pregnancy.

    A lot of people do decide to be single mothers - even when the father wants to be involved. Its a very very complex issue and very few cases are the same. The factors that go into abortion and how it affects the woman and man are very individual. I was cut up over it and still think about it sometimes. Whereas another man might think "phew lucky escape". All depends on the persons involved.

    Most unplanned pregnancies will involve either or both partners being torn in different ways, sometimes in different ways to each other. I can completely understand how someone who's parents are advising one way and who's very young partner is wanting another will be very badly placed to know what she wants and why she wants it. That's always a risk alright, as is the risk that the decision might not sit well with a person 10 years on. How and ever, that was what she decided and I respect that she erred on the side of caution about not being ready to be a parent.

    I'm sorry she and you haven't managed to respect the decision she made though. I can only say that feeling guilt over something you can no longer control, to the extent that it is effecting your life, is something that needs counselling.


  • #339
    B_Wayne
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,039 ✭✭✭B_Wayne


    RobertKK wrote: »
    Masturbation doesn't create a life to destroy. You could easily have used a wet dream, but that natural way would not have suited your point of view.

    Not really, one chooses to masturbate so surely the lost potential for a cure for cancer by choice is an issue? Why haven't you addressed the possibility of baring the next Hitler? There's an endless list of possibilities but that means feck all...


  • #340
    bodice ripper
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,681 ✭✭✭bodice ripper


    RobertKK wrote: »
    Masturbation doesn't create a life to destroy. You could easily have used a wet dream, but that natural way would not have suited your point of view.


    or, the fused egg and sperm could fail to implant, but that natural way would not have suited your point of view.


  • #341
    Ave Sodalis
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,555 ✭✭✭Ave Sodalis


    smash wrote: »
    I guess all women should be forced to get checked to see where they fit on the scale before they have sex... :rolleyes:


    I know a woman who did that. Highly religious. Has 12 children.


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  • #342
    Dandy Dandridge
    Closed Accounts Posts: 45 ✭Dandy Dandridge


    Abortion is wrong and should only be an option in the case of direct physical threat to the life of the mother or if scans have identified PROFOUND physical deficiencies in the fetus which would lead to a terrible life of existence. Otherwise adoption is the way to go. Tough **** on rape victims, rape is no excuse for adoption. No one was born a rapist.


  • #343
    Ave Sodalis
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,555 ✭✭✭Ave Sodalis


    Dandy Dandridge wrote: »
    Abortion is wrong and should only be an option in the case of direct physical threat to the life of the mother or if scans have identified PROFOUND physical deficiencies in the fetus which would lead to a terrible life of existence. Otherwise adoption is the way to go. Tough **** on rape victims, rape is no excuse for adoption. No one was born a rapist.


    :confused::confused::confused:

    What the fudge?!


  • #344
    RobertKK
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 33,771 ✭✭✭✭RobertKK


    sup_dude wrote: »
    Sperm create life, don't they?



    Are all contraceptive fool proof?

    Sperm are not a new life, they need an egg.

    Yes all contraception is foolproof, I learned this from the people who argue condoms are the solution to the HIV/AIDS problem.
    Have sex with a condom it will protect your partner, now here we are getting a different argument in regards to pregnancy...
    Love these arguments made to suit an argument.


  • #345
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,809 ✭✭✭✭smash


    RobertKK wrote: »
    Masturbation doesn't create a life to destroy.

    Sperm is alive by your standards. So are eggs. Is male masturbation considered murder? Is allowing yourself to have your period and not get pregnant considered manslaughter?

    Just because the two combined forms a new form of life, doesn't make it a life which automatically demands its own rights. Especially at the early stages.


  • #346
    K4t
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,362 ✭✭✭K4t


    Dandy Dandridge wrote: »
    Abortion is wrong and should only be an option in the case of direct physical threat to the life of the mother or if scans have identified PROFOUND physical deficiencies in the fetus which would lead to a terrible life of existence. Otherwise adoption is the way to go. Tough **** on rape victims, rape is no excuse for adoption. No one was born a rapist.
    I see your true colours, and that's why I love you, so don't be afraid to let them show...your true colours...


  • #347
    B_Wayne
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,039 ✭✭✭B_Wayne


    Dandy Dandridge wrote: »
    Abortion is wrong and should only be an option in the case of direct physical threat to the life of the mother or if scans have identified PROFOUND physical deficiencies in the fetus which would lead to a terrible life of existence. Otherwise adoption is the way to go. Tough **** on rape victims, rape is no excuse for adoption. No one was born a rapist.

    So their psychological well being takes a back seat? That messed up tbh... Forcing a person to bare a pregnancy against their will, what a lovely world people dream of.


  • #348
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,809 ✭✭✭✭smash


    Dandy Dandridge wrote: »
    Tough **** on rape victims, rape is no excuse for adoption. No one was born a rapist.

    Just... wow :eek:


  • #349
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,809 ✭✭✭✭smash


    RobertKK wrote: »
    Yes all contraception is foolproof, I learned this from the people who argue condoms are the solution to the HIV/AIDS problem.
    Have sex with a condom it will protect your partner, now here we are getting a different argument in regards to pregnancy...
    Love these arguments made to suit an argument.

    Did you forget the sarcasm smiley?


  • #350
    mikom
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,391 ✭✭✭✭mikom


    Dandy Dandridge wrote: »
    Abortion is wrong and should only be an option in the case of direct physical threat to the life of the mother or if scans have identified PROFOUND physical deficiencies in the fetus which would lead to a terrible life of existence. Otherwise adoption is the way to go. Tough **** on rape victims, rape is no excuse for adoption. No one was born a rapist.

    23 posts.
    Hello again.


  • #351
    Ave Sodalis
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,555 ✭✭✭Ave Sodalis


    RobertKK wrote: »
    Sperm are not a new life, they need an egg.

    Yes all contraception is foolproof, I learned this from the people who argue condoms are the solution to the HIV/AIDS problem.
    Have sex with a condom it will protect your partner, now here we are getting a different argument in regards to pregnancy...
    Love these arguments made to suit an argument.

    There's a difference between using condoms for HIV and condoms for contraception. To be honest, I don't really give a damn what people said about using them for HIV. I'm talking about their use for contraceptive. Condoms, pills, injection, nurvaring etc are not 100% and may fail


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  • #352
    bjork
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,554 ✭✭✭bjork


    sup_dude wrote: »
    There's a difference between using condoms for HIV and condoms for contraception. To be honest, I don't really give a damn what people said about using them for HIV. I'm talking about their use for contraceptive. Condoms, pills, injection, nurvaring etc are not 100% and may fail

    What's the difference? I found RobertKKs comparison extremely apt. Could you point out the flaws in the argument? because I'm having difficultly!


  • #353
    eviltwin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    RobertKK wrote: »
    Sperm are not a new life, they need an egg.

    Yes all contraception is foolproof, I learned this from the people who argue condoms are the solution to the HIV/AIDS problem.
    Have sex with a condom it will protect your partner, now here we are getting a different argument in regards to pregnancy...
    Love these arguments made to suit an argument.

    Abortion is not a replacement for affordable contraception, good sex ed and proper support for those who want to continue with an unplanned pregnancy. Just as condoms don't replace AIDS education and research into a cure. No one is saying its a "solution", just reminding you that it is an option and as valid a one as keeping the child or placing it for adoption.


  • #354
    Ave Sodalis
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,555 ✭✭✭Ave Sodalis


    bjork wrote: »
    What's the difference? I found RobertKKs comparison extremely apt. Could you point out the flaws in the argument? because I'm having difficultly!

    The main one being this isn't about HIV/AIDs. I wasn't involved in that discussion and therefore never claimed anything with regard to it. So how could I have one argument for one, and another for another, when I never presented the first argument? But every health professional will tell you that contraception is not 100% effective. If you don't know that, that's worrying.


  • #355
    wonderfullife
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,924 ✭✭✭wonderfullife


    Slightly back topic I wonder was the girl paid to take part in this piece? People are commending her for stepping up/bravery so just wondering what sort of financial motivations present in doing a documentary like this.


  • #356
    bjork
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,554 ✭✭✭bjork


    sup_dude wrote: »
    The main one being this isn't about HIV/AIDs. I wasn't involved in that discussion and therefore never claimed anything with regard to it. So how could I have one argument for one, and another for another, when I never presented the first argument? But every health professional will tell you that contraception is not 100% effective. If you don't know that, that's worrying.

    I was interested in your answer because you said there was no difference, but unfortunately you can't formulate one, pity!


  • #357
    Ave Sodalis
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,555 ✭✭✭Ave Sodalis


    bjork wrote: »
    I was interested in your answer because you said there was no difference, but unfortunately you can't formulate one, pity!

    I didn't say there was no difference? In fact, I specifically said there was a difference. How can I formulate an answer for something I never said.


  • #358
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,809 ✭✭✭✭smash


    wonderfullife wrote: »
    Slightly back topic I wonder was the girl paid to take part in this piece? People are commending her for stepping up/bravery so just wondering what sort of financial motivations present in doing a documentary like this.

    Does it matter? She didn't have the abortion to get on TV, it wasn't the driving factor. For what it's worth, I hope she was at least compensated enough to cover her costs for the procedure.


  • #359
    Shrap
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,163 ✭✭✭Shrap


    wonderfullife wrote: »
    Slightly back topic I wonder was the girl paid to take part in this piece? People are commending her for stepping up/bravery so just wondering what sort of financial motivations present in doing a documentary like this.

    Being an Irish woman and knowing exactly how vilified she would be by telling her story, I doubt any money would give you the required thick skin to be unaffected by the haters. I imagine that she has a sense of duty to break the omerta on Irish women who travel in their thousands every year to do exactly the same as she did.


  • #360
    Dandy Dandridge
    Closed Accounts Posts: 45 ✭Dandy Dandridge


    Dandy Dandridge wrote: »
    Abortion is wrong and should only be an option in the case of direct physical threat to the life of the mother or if scans have identified PROFOUND physical deficiencies in the fetus which would lead to a terrible life of existence. Otherwise adoption is the way to go. Tough **** on rape victims, rape is no excuse for adoption. No one was born a rapist.

    Typo on the second last sentence. it should have read, rape is no excuse for abortion.

    For some poxy reason the edit function is not working so I couldn't edit the post hence my explanation now.


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  • #361
    Ave Sodalis
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,555 ✭✭✭Ave Sodalis


    Dandy Dandridge wrote: »
    Typo on the second last sentence. it should have read, rape is no excuse for abortion.

    For some poxy reason the edit function is not working so I couldn't edit the post hence my explanation now.


    I think there needs to more of an explanation of your post than that...


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