Even more adverts you despise

Must be at least a week since we last discussed them.I have spare time on my hands so I will kick off......
I am partly influenced to rant by the new godawful food hygiene ads.People with their faces blurred talk about how they got food poisoning.Is food poisoning something you ought to be ashamed of?I got gandhis revenge for a few days once from a bad burger bun at a local sham- hang- out -cum -takeaway(that I still go to,more fool me:D ).But I am not ashamed of it-much like waiting in hospitals for hours,it annoys you but at least it gives you something to rant about.Whats with the blurred faces?These people go on tv blurred and you think Poor guys,probably on some ad about sex abuse,being victims of crime or something similiar.But no,they are talking about food poisoning
The Nike stickman ads are beginning to really bore me.Maybe its just that I never liked Nike ads much anyway because of their whole Man U arse kissing thing.
The Halifax one where the cartoon guy sings Who Gives You Extra.
The shampoo or bubblebath ad which ends with the fat woman in the bath singing badly.
The Irish ad with the angry looking old lawyer with the moustache trying to entice shams to lodge nuisance claims on a no win no fee basis.
Tampon ads.Nuff said.
The ad for carloans(or is it insurance)where the people ask a question and a girl in a mechanic suit keeps anwsering"Yes,you could!".Happens about 5 fcuking times at least!
The one for those roll up Mexican bread thingys(I think it is El Paso tacos or something)where the guy is making them and thewoman is on the phone to her friend complaining that he will make a crap job of it.Id ****in piss in the food to really give her cause to complain.
Im not sure if they still show it but Sky News used to have this ad for an irish sex chat service with possibly the most boring voice heaard on tv since that priest with Father Ted who also managed to get lost in Irelands largest lingerie department.A girl,making about as much effort as a councilman,would say"Sexchat,Irelands newest and most exciting adult chat service.Chat,date and text.....".It sounded like it was being said by a nun who had a gun out to her head in order to make her read the script.
And has anybody seen the Pele viagra ads recently?:D You will never see them anywhere except on low on funds satellite channels in the wee hours,but it is the stuff of Tarrant on TV.Pele talks as if he is struggling to read an autocue about how he and the guys never discussed impotence after a game.Which is funny,as when I played after a match the first thing we would talk about was whether we had any impotence concerns.We talked about it for about 5 minutes before we would even comment on the gameplay and how we had played.
OK,unless the sarcasm detectors are broken you can see this is bollix,but WTF is he talking about??!!?
"Get advice,I would"
Hmmm,I advise you to get a new agent who might get you a football punditry job rather than making yourself look like a tool(pardon the pun) by selling sex drugs on late night telly.Next we will have Saddam trying to make a George Foreman style comeback with his own exclusive line
"In 1988 I killed 5000 Kurds with it.And at last in 2003,you can kill up to 5000 woodworm/termites/fleas/whatever with Saddam Husseins patented gas in a can!"
Im sure the execs are trying harder than the CIA to find him first.

Edit-99% of sponsorship ads annoy the head off me.They are ALL crap!The guy putting on the rehab voice in the smarties simpsons sponsorship ads really pisses me off.And the Coronation Street Cadburys one where the guy uses a pile of French in order to make his egg and chips sound more upmarket.The only funny sponsorship ad I can recall is the Sopranos Miller ads
"Do I wanna notha Milla?Course I wanna notha Milla ya fukin gamoosh!"