Dumb/Great Facebook Status {merge} [No Names]

Mr Benevolent · 24-05-2013 10:01AM

LexieOnRale wrote: »

This girl is a lesbian, with an ex husband. shes been dating this chick for about 10 days.
At 7pm
Was a great night with my love, finally got some sleep, we just laid here laughin and smiling being absolutely ridiculous together. Thank you for understanding me and my sense or humor and loving me for being me. Thank you my love for being my lover and my best friend, it's wonderful to wake up next to you, roll over and see your smile. Keep your head up and remember I'm by your side. Loving you to infinity and beyond. - feeling loved.

At 11pm.
Going to do a show cause I just can't take it anymore. Broken once again, but what's new? *tags ex husband* you are the coolest friend ever, I miss you like a fat kid misses snack time. I'd be lost without you, who else would tell me about bears riding motorbikes while drinking vodka? Nobody else, only you. Love you.

At 2:30 am.
I don't know what to really think or feel at the moment. I feel like a retard and an idiot. Story of my life. Why do I never let myself be happy? I don't know if that day will ever come. I run from love like it's the plague. Why I don't know but I just do and it's fuked up. I may have lost a great person tonight, but ill always have the memories if I did in fact lose them. Don't think ill be sleeping tonight. Sigh.

Dealing with one woman is challenging, but two together? It'd be a tsunami of tears and periods. Imagine Red Flag Week extending indefinitely into the future...

nucker · 24-05-2013 10:05AM

I get people who are either so in love in their babies or constantly putting up statuses about their dead babies, I don't mind the odd one or two statuses, but every day? Come on people, y'know, I'm sure that everyone loves their children, but to constantly go on about it is just silly...plus do they really have the time to go on facebook when they have children and constantly post things about how much they miss them etc....?

mackeire · 24-05-2013 10:14AM

u_c_thesecond wrote: »

lol if that's a girl names Natasha then we have the same person on our friends list

no her name happens to be Mona, which is quite funny because she never actually stop moaning!!

Plazaman · 24-05-2013 10:25AM

Moving for a moment from the Dumb to Great Status section, I seen this recently from a 40 year old guy :-

The kids next door have challenged me to a water fight. Just thought I'd update my status while I wait for the kettle to boil.

XxMCRxBabyxX · 24-05-2013 10:29AM

WhiteRoses wrote: »

Nope, pretty sure its 47 because someone commented saying "Its not goodbye, its a see you later, you'll see her in heaven hun xx" and the girl who put the status up replied: "What do you mean its a see you later are you mocking me, I never even got to meet her kinda tactless thing to say hun "

How can you miss someone that you never met?

Did anyone question her over that?

24-05-2013 10:55AM

I can't stop checking this persons posts everyday, its like a drug for me. Latest gem.

Ad A Dacent Visit Wit My Man Dis Mornin Jst Me, him & Our Lil Man It Was Luvly His In Great Form & Luks Vry We'll Tank God Onli Anoder Few Mnths Til His Hme Wit Us Wit Da Help Of God Miss Him Terrible He Made Luvly Stuf Anal 4 Me & Da Child Telpis Soo Much 2 Luk Foward 2 Wen He Gets Out Luvs My Lil Family Millions xxxxxxxx

TPD · 24-05-2013 10:59AM

Evalyn Spoiled Unicorn wrote: »

Anal 4 Me & Da Child

......

kunst nugget · 24-05-2013 11:00AM

Evalyn Spoiled Unicorn wrote: »

I can't stop checking this persons posts everyday, its like a drug for me. Latest gem.

Ad A Dacent Visit Wit My Man Dis Mornin Jst Me, him & Our Lil Man It Was Luvly His In Great Form & Luks Vry We'll Tank God Onli Anoder Few Mnths Til His Hme Wit Us Wit Da Help Of God Miss Him Terrible He Made Luvly Stuf Anal 4 Me & Da Child Telpis Soo Much 2 Luk Foward 2 Wen He Gets Out Luvs My Lil Family Millions xxxxxxxx

Are you sure that's not from Are You Ok Hun?

24-05-2013 11:05AM

kunst nugget wrote: »

Are you sure that's not from Are You Ok Hun?

This person is real. Her fella and her brother are in jail, she has a young toddler. Her updates are just gold.

Toto Wolfcastle · 24-05-2013 11:05AM

Thwip! wrote: »

Yes, great thanks. Got good news for a change. Things are looking up for me. Get up out of that

Someone grab me some whiskey I need to cleanse myself

It's amazing what taking a few vowels out can do. I would have read that start of it as 'Yes, great to get good news for a change...'

batistuta9 · 24-05-2013 11:09AM

Bobblehead Panda wrote: »

It's amazing what taking a few vowels out can do. I would have read that start of it as 'Yes, great to get good news for a change...'

that is what it says at the start

Toto Wolfcastle · 24-05-2013 11:16AM

Evalyn Spoiled Unicorn wrote: »

I can't stop checking this persons posts everyday, its like a drug for me. Latest gem.

Ad A Dacent Visit Wit My Man Dis Mornin Jst Me, him & Our Lil Man It Was Luvly His In Great Form & Luks Vry We'll Tank God Onli Anoder Few Mnths Til His Hme Wit Us Wit Da Help Of God Miss Him Terrible He Made Luvly Stuf Anal 4 Me & Da Child Telpis Soo Much 2 Luk Foward 2 Wen He Gets Out Luvs My Lil Family Millions xxxxxxxx

It's pretty bad when the misuse of the word anal is not the worst thing about a post.

kunst nugget · 24-05-2013 11:18AM

Bobblehead Panda wrote: »

It's pretty bad when the misuse of the word anal is not the worst thing about a post.

Knackers seem to love anal. It's in all their posts.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 24-05-2013 11:22AM

kunst nugget wrote: »

Are you sure that's not from Are You Ok Hun?

Boys ill be damned if that's not the funniest page on the Internet. I cry TEARS at some of those! I eagerly await the next post today to see how she got on on her date last night.

kunst nugget · 24-05-2013 11:25AM

LexieOnRale wrote: »

Boys ill be damned if that's not the funniest page on the Internet. I cry TEARS at some of those! I eagerly await the next post today to see how she got on on her date last night.

Calling the priest a profiterole because she couldn't take photos at the communion was a classic. The karma chameleon will get him.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 24-05-2013 11:26AM

kunst nugget wrote: »

Calling the priest a profiterole because she couldn't take photos at the communion was a classic. The karma chameleon will get him.

4m Kannada? Weres dat is it neer disney wurld

thesandeman · 24-05-2013 12:41PM

Bobblehead Panda wrote: »

It's pretty bad when the misuse of the word anal is not the worst thing about a post.

I understand the anal bit but what does Telpis translate as?

batistuta9 · 24-05-2013 12:53PM

thesandeman wrote: »

I understand the anal bit but what does Telpis translate as?

i think it's 'to help us' :pac:

that makes sense anyway when reading/translating it

krudler · 24-05-2013 01:01PM

thesandeman wrote: »

I understand the anal bit but what does Telpis translate as?

its shortened version of "ah god help us"

pc7 · 24-05-2013 01:55PM

Anyone have the link to you ok hun?

kunst nugget · 24-05-2013 02:36PM

pc7 wrote: »

Anyone have the link to you ok hun?

https://www.facebook.com/hopeurokhun?ref=ts&fref=ts

nucker · 24-05-2013 02:49PM

Another dumb one is "I need a hug" or "I'm bored" or depending on their spelling abilities "Im board" lol

Drakares · 24-05-2013 02:57PM

http://i.imgur.com/AptDMFR.jpg

Fúck off and die.

pc7 · 24-05-2013 03:00PM

Drakares wrote: »

http://i.imgur.com/AptDMFR.jpg

Fúck off and die.

How old is the poster? Please say 13

nucker · 24-05-2013 03:02PM

pc7 wrote: »

How old is the poster? Please say 13

Why do you want this to be a 13yo?

kunst nugget · 24-05-2013 03:05PM

Drakares wrote: »

http://i.imgur.com/AptDMFR.jpg

Fúck off and die.

I'm going to presume that's a teenager. I'm so glad I didn't have facebook back in my teenage days because they all come across as horrible, self absorbed cünts on it. It's great to go through life without any sort of permanent record of what a dick you were when you were 15.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 24-05-2013 03:06PM

Drakares wrote: »

http://i.imgur.com/AptDMFR.jpg

Fúck off and die.

Hahaha I am wakkkkkkkke. I would totally comment "haha" under that.

pc7 · 24-05-2013 03:08PM

nucker wrote: »

Why do you want this to be a 13yo?

Because 13 year olds can be excused for being dramatic and attention seeking, a grown adult posting like this on facebook is mortifying.

ronan45 · 24-05-2013 03:15PM

Drakares wrote: »

http://i.imgur.com/AptDMFR.jpg

Fúck off and die.

DRAMA QUEEN BOTH OF YAS:rolleyes:

SunnyDub1 · 24-05-2013 03:17PM

kunst nugget wrote: »

I'm going to presume that's a teenager. I'm so glad I didn't have facebook back in my teenage days because they all come across as horrible, self absorbed cünts on it. It's great to go through life without any sort of permanent record of what a dick you were when you were 15.

not just teenagers. I see posts like this daily from grown adults:rolleyes:

One I cam across a while ago.

person 1 (status) - "ugh so annoyed one of them days"

person 2 - "you ok babe? call over for a cuppa"

Person 1 - "thanks Hun, but not really in the humor of seeing or talking to anyone, just one of them days"

person 2 "ah Hun I understand, the offer stands anyway, we could even have wine instead of tea

"

Person 1 " thanks but I'd rather not talk about it"

THEN WHY BLOODY POST ANYTHING!!!

These woman are both in their early 30's

Dumb/Great Facebook Status {merge} [No Names]

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